Snowball

Snowball, who has no chance in Hell | he/him

Have you ever heard the phrase "He doesn't have a snowball's chance in hell?" Well, meet Snowball. He's been wandering around Hell, trying to find a way out for all of his existence. And he's not happy about it. But really, what is there for Snowball to be happy about? Because he's so cute, nobody takes him seriously... and because he's so foul-mouthed, nobody wants to be around him. Yep, life really sucks for ol' Snowball. 

Snowball has a squeaky, grating voice and a very colorful vocabulary. He's crass and ornery, but also very desperate for help, and is often begging for someone to just give him a chance. Yet anyone who meets him knows that, in fact, he is doomed to have no chance at all.