Eggward Eggcellent

Personality: Seems like a sensual, calm guy when you talk to him in public, but one wrong move can set him off to a strange grown man tantrum. He's basically just a big baby trapped in an adult egg's body. He's also a pretty big dick.

Backstory: Eggward was raised in a house nearby Arthur's goat farm. The 2 immediately became close friends. He lived a pretty nice life with Arthur, until one day, as a joke, he pushed him into goat feed. They laughed it off at the time, and Eggward quickly went home to grab something while Arthur went to feed the goats. Next thing he knew, when Eggward came back outside, the first thing he saw was his best friend running away with Lucky, crying. Eggward called after him, but to no avail.
At the time, a girl 2 years older than Eggward and Arthur had always jokingly terrorized the friends. She was an angel in front of adults, but a little fiery ball of Satan when she's alone. Eggward immediately blamed her for this, but couldn't tell any adults because of how much of a "perfect angel" she was. So Eggward decided he'd have to deal with this himself.
Eggward visited the girl's house a few days later, pretending to be cool with her. It turns out, the girl actually had a huge hankering for Eggward at the time, and thought this was her chance to confess her love. But to the egg kid, on the other hand, he felt this was the chance to get revenge.
Eggward grabbed a kitchen knife, entered the girl's room, and began attacking. The girl cried out in agony, leading to her father running in and tackling Eggward. He was prepared for this, and sliced the father in the leg, before making his quick escape.

Extra notes: Is a homosexual due to his hatred of the female gender, bleeds yolk, cries yolk, and blush is yellow,doesn't have a mouth, or genitals, or any holes in his body whatsoever, monocle can change shapes depending on his emotions (and even blink), voice claim: StamperTV (suggested by Hoagie on the forums), theme song: Studio Killers - All Men Are Pigs