$12 // Alex

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Info


Created
7 years, 19 days ago
Creator
Ziiatax
Favorites
2

Profile


Profile
Name Alexa Madelynne Paquette.
Age 19.
Build Short;chubby.
Species Panda.
Gender Male.
Orient. Homosexual.
Pronouns He/Him, she/her.
Occupation Bartender, barista.
Creator @celestialgalaxychan.
Worth $12.
Personality

Alex is a precious boy. He’s very delicate, from his frame to his trust. Though he’s a bit insecure, he finds security when dressing in feminine clothing. Due to his upbringing, he finds solace and confidence when wearing things such a skirts or dresses. He clings to the mentality that he’s doing the right thing when he’s wearing clothes that he was forced to wear during his childhood. Alex isn’t the wisest or sharpest person in the world, coming off a bit naive and dense, sometimes blatantly ignorant to the trouble that people may bring, or how the things he does may affect him in the future. One of these instances is his unhealthy schedule that he was bent to grow accustomed to to provide a delicate safety net. When he was in high school, there were many people around him trying to help him, though perhaps it was his pride--- or perhaps it was his attempt to grasp what little humanity he had left, he didn’t allow anyone to help him. During his high school years, he worked extremely hard to keep himself afloat. He juggled multiple jobs, deriving himself of most physical and intimate contact with others, nor did he take good care of himself at all. He leveled himself down to scum and felt undeserving of the attention others’ wanted to give him. When it comes down to it, alex isn’t very confident in himself. He was never quite given the chance to, constantly changing so that people wouldn’t bat an eye at him for being weird or awkward. he finds interactions extremely hard, trying his best not to talk to others unless he truly had to, or if it were a friend.

He’s infinitely subservient to anyone, taking many odd jobs no matter how big or small. He tries to never do anything that’s less than what he believes he can do. Alex bathes in the little affection he is given, striving to help anyone he can even when there’s no assurance that it will help him in the end. He loves meeting new people and enjoys hanging out with them, he finds it difficult to ever get close to others due to his own trust issues. He finds himself unworthy of such thing, sometimes punishing himself whenever he caught himself falling into a state of vulnerability in front of others. He becomes reclusive when he senses that someone is trying to get to know him, hesitant to tell others about himself in fear that they may leave him. A part of himself that he hates is how quickly he is to jump to conclusions. His trust in others bend and snap really easily, and he can never keep relations healthy with others since he’s constantly anxious that the person may think he’s too much or that he’s being petty. In his attempt to stay calm, he ends up making brash decisions that he does almost impulsively without thinking about what others may think--- he allows his feelings to override reason over his words and actions and he sometimes accidentally ends up hurting himself or burning a bridge.

History

Alex was the first son born into an influential family. Though his parents did value the need for a male heir, that wasn't their main priority for their first child. They wished for a daughter and treated Alex as such. It influenced his every move. From his name to his clothing, and even to his mannerisms. He was taught at a young age how to be a proper lady, being quite sheltered and never learning that what they were doing was ever wrong. Who grew up thinking the way he was treated as normal, never having experienced any outside influence outside of tutors and maids that took care of him in his parents' stead.

This made him become overly dependent on the affection that he received for being as he was. Complacent and never questioning anything due to his own ignorance. He reveled in the attention more than he wanted to admit. He was dressed in the finest of wear and even grew out his hair. Anything that would sway his perception of his lifestyle was blocked out entirely. The tutors that he had were under the tight hand of his parents to prevent them from teaching anything that might make Alex thing differently. This all happened unbeknownst to Alex, and he lived blissfully unaware under the careful watch of his parents up until his freshman year.

He never knew that his gender had influenced how he was treated, and only learned the expense of it when he was kicked out of his own home, having no credentials that would help him in the future. It didn't help that he had had private tutors all of his life and was rarely let outside of the manor that his parents lived in. It was only after a week or so alone that he internalized the reason why he was suddenly tossed out without a second thought.

There had only ever been sparse rumors around him, fleeting words from the maids around him that his mother was once again carrying, this time with the perfect little girl they had first hoped for. They had become financially unstable, unable to sufficiently take care of him. It was only their silver lining that they had no need for a boy that they hadn't wished for, who hadn't met each of their expectations. Even if they lost money and had to drop a few workers, they would have their baby girl.

During this time, having been thrown out mentally broke Alex beyond repair. It wasn't that he cared for having a roof over his head, no, it was the lack of affection that was suddenly cut off. He was used to being pampered, hugged, and spoken to on a daily basis that it made him almost fear being away. Just the notion that he would most likely never see his parents again (not after they so vehemently voiced their hate for him) made him quake and want nothing more than to crawl back to them and beg for forgiveness for a sin he didn't know he had committed.

He was forced to stop schooling and only survived because a cafe owner took pity on a street rat and took him in. Of course, the owner didn't pity him so much that he allowed Alex to leech off of him, but made him work for food and a small cot that was in the backroom of the establishment. Alex proved himself to be of use, and he remained there for two years. He still hadn't gone back to get a proper education, figuring that that could wait, even if it was a large setback that caused many people who didn't know him well to look down on him.

After two years, Alex managed to work up enough money from odd jobs to rent a tiny apartment that he still owns to this day. It took much more time to scrape up enough money to make due with each month, but eventually, he was even able to pay an attend small classes online. Even when he couldn't make ends meet, the owner of the cafe would always be there to support him when he couldn't do so himself. He would be endlessly scolded for taking on so many jobs that consumed any hope of Alex obtaining a social life.

The only people he really ever interacted with were the regulars that came by the cafe. Though he was still a tad bit shy, people adored him for his adorable demeanor that he didn't know he exuded. He's rather dense, people learned, so many of his friends also tend to be overprotective when strangers decide to try and make advances on him (which really isn't often, Alex proclaims. His friends say otherwise.) His night job as a bartender differed from this, where Alex was a lot more reserved and tended to hide behind his co-workers whenever someone got a bit too tipsy.

His own obligation to his work as well as gaining his high school diploma consumed his life, causing him to be reliant on caffeine and schedule naps to get him through the day. During this time, many of the people he was close to attempted to voice their concerns, but they full onto deaf ears as Alex was usually too tired (and sometimes annoyingly stubborn) and their words went through one ear and out the other. Old habits died hard, he learned once he had finished all of his credits and was able to earn his high school diploma.

During the years it took to gain the diploma, he had continuously told everyone that he was old enough to take care of himself, though they could all see that he was suffering. He never quite had the time to properly sit down with someone about how he was doing, but when he was forced to, he ended up realizing how hard he had fallen. It wasn’t easy building his life back up after falling into such an unhealthy schedule. He had to quit many of the jobs he had taken, opting to only ration his time between the cafe and bar he worked at and made sure to push in a few breaks in between so that he didn’t crash again.

He became much happier, more secure. With his schedule dispersed between a day job and night job, he was able to also ration his time to spending time with the friends that stuck around long enough to get to know him. Before he knew it, he had even opened up enough to become a bit affectionate, no longer skittish about touch when it came to people he truly trusted. He relished in the affection he was able to get, and his friends soothed the bubbling anxiety that he might become too needy or annoying, reassuring that they would always be up for a hug or cuddle if he wanted it. He wholeheartedly appreciated each and every friend he had met, and the voice in the back of his head that was a constant reminder that he might be a nuisance has disappeared.

Notes
➳ Alex finds comfort in his femininity even though he really wants to leave that part of himself behind.
➳ His smile is described as infectious by his friends.
➳ He's a total light weight and tends to become a sad drunk when he's given too much alcohol.
➳ On his days off he prefers to tidy up his apartment and settle with a book than going out and doing things.
➳ He falls in love easily, but never has the courage to confess his feelings no matter how close he is to the person.
➳ When his friends are able to drag him out for any type of partying, he prefers karaoke than crowded areas.
➳ He can't swim for his life. He'll sink like a rock if his body touches water (he even has to be cautious during baths.)
Likes
Likes:
   ▵ affection and intimacy.
   ▵ nights out with friends.
   ▵ coffee and 5-hour energy.
   ▵ cruising in the passenger seat with friends.
Dislikes
Dislikes:
   ▵ one night stands.
   ▵ loud noises when he's alone.
   ▵ quiet when he's in the company of friends.
   ▵ ending friendships/relationships.

Relationships

Leo ⏐ Close friend
[21]

Latte ⏐ Best friend
[21]
theme credit | vom