Say something nice about the above person's lit!

@ProfessionalDumbass

Alright! Right away I love how your descriptions incorproate a lot of the senses. I love reading about what a character is feeling, touch-wise, not emotion-wise, and it's often overlooked in most things I read nowadays. It makes sense that Ulik would be all hot and sweaty from being in a forge all day, laboring over a sword, and I loved that you describe it right as we get into the literature! Your descriptions are fantastic in general, in just a few sentences I got a great picture of the setting, the characters and the scene. I admit, I'm a bit wordy when describing settings and such, so I always commend authors that can get both to the point, while also taking the time and care to describe a setting without skimping on the details. Well done!

I also really loved your characterizations, specifically how the hot-headed, proud and brash Ulik clashes with the sneaky, sly and slippery (ha! alliteration) Advisor. Seeing characters with personalities that will inevitably come to blows is always one of my favorite dynamics in literature and writing, and I loved seeing it here. The way the Advisor threatens Ulik, but he's both stubborn and set that he just doesn't care for her threats? Incredible, simply excellent.

Great work! Keep it up!

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NP: Please read Cemetery! Warnings for mentions of death and a brief description of a flashback. Nothing too detailed, but it is one. Use your own discretion. And ping me too!

EDIT: I've uploaded a new literature: Sunny! It's not as heavy as the one above, if you would prefer something a bit lighter ^^

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I ABSOLUTELY ADORE the descriptions. theyre all so nice and detailed and i feel like im in the car on this road trip - also i love the fact that poor aspens just suffering while theres a literal LEOPARD IN THE BACK OF THE CAR just chilling - i love the banter between farran and aspen abt the country music playing on the radio!!! you write dialogue rlly well and it flows nicely.. 1000/10, absolutely stunning story

here's my fave character's diary :D but heed the warnings. unfortunately all of my lits are content-warned and this is the least severe one in terms of content so SOB

aaand i forgot to ping them im so sorry Commodore

angeliic_gestalt WOW! What a diary! I really love how natural the writing feels. Sure, some of the words are fancy, but its very fitting for a rich man's daughter, who is expected to be perfect, even in her own thoughts. She has a very sad life, a very loveless one as well.

 "Despite being rich in everything else, we were poor in the one thing that mattered." This has to be my favorite line from the whole thing. It hits so hard, especially after you finish reading the literature. Truly summarizes her in one depressing line. 

Your writing is very mature, and extremely beautiful. And its easy to read as well! I'm not a fan of huge chunks of paragraphs personally, so seeing something broken up into smaller, more manageable bits was excellent for me! It was a pleasure to read, and it seemed like it was very fun to write as well! I really have nothing bad to say about it! Great work! You'd be a wonderful author!

NP: Please ping me! 

This is a bit into Boss's life. Nothing too long, nothing too graphic. Though there is mentions of bodily harm and drinking. You don't need much context on her backstory to understand it, but hey, I won't complain if you read that as well!

I am very open to constructive criticism, but be polite about it! I am a newer writer, and I'd love a tip if you've got one! Enjoy!

Esterofila I am so sorry to keep being a Boss fangirl feel free to chase me off. First, and admittedly I'm far from a professional, but it doesn't show at all that you're a newer writer. you've got an amazing sense for structuring paragraphs to have that awesome almost-musical sentence flow, you definitely know what you're doing and it feels so easy and good to read. The only critique I feel like I could possibly give atp is literally just changing the first "it has" to "it's" because it reads weird to see the no contraction next to "ain't" LOL

Boss especially shines so much, I think something that this made me realize has always drawn me to her, and i'm sorry to bully her like this, but it's that really human pathetic side. Even in third person it's such a delight to be in her head; Her voice comes across so clear and it's so fun to read, the use of the name Bessie gives it that extra cozy edge, the weight of her fear and anxiety and anger and the vitriol she puts out because of it. the horse. the ambience of the A+ title. the "you gonna drink that?" after she was stuck in her own head. the mirror. she's just the perfect sympathetic bad guy, my heart is full and I want to read more like this

Liberry. Choose whatever catches your interest + please feel free to look at the older ones, I will not lie some of them are definitely better than some of the newer ones. Don't have to write as much as I did + random thoughts and concrit both welcome o/

v Sorry there was no Black Lantern info for you in there, it is in fact an AU exclusively for that self indulgent 'what if these two guys talked' scenario so I'm glad that part worked well lol, tysm :] Have had your scenes open since this morning, excited to find out a bit more abt the animation 💙
updates: I Love Aranine

^ ayeee glad you took a peek

zeta-male 

I chose this one because I because, ngl, I got pretty excited to see how Maggot and Ines would interact. Those two seem to have pretty contrasting personalities and it plays out really nicely here, I especially feel like it characterizes Ines well. But really, both of their personalities stand out so well because of how different they are from the surface. The subject seems like a great thing to write about too, just because it really says so much about both of them in a short amount of words. The tension between them is enough for me to be pretty damn curious about this whole Black Lantern thing, so I found myself reading up on their profiles after I finished it. Because of that, I think you did a pretty nice job giving a glimpse into your world building, whether that was intentional or not. I appreciate when authors provide that sort of information only through action and that was done quite effectively here. 

I also enjoy how the story starts off right in the action, pretty much just cutting to the point. The conflict builds and plays out at the right pace which makes it easy to follow along. Something about your writing feels artistic in a way, I can't really describe it but it has a really nice flow and everything just feels very intentional. I'm pretty bad at picking up on random typos or grammatical errors but I didn't notice anything off when I read it through   Overall good stuff, I like seeing your character's dynamics. 

Here's my library, not much of a choice, the two stories in there are actually the same one told from differing perspectives, so feel free to go with whatever one you fancy (or both if you want the full picture). If you notice anything off-sounding / grammar issues feel free to point it out. 

Might take a while so I will @ when done.

Lordbrianc

First of all, love the very concept of this story; I love anything and everything to do with rockstars and music in general. Throw in some high stakes and action and you've got a compelling plot! And starting off with “You know, you actually have to kill me to get the money,” is quite the hook! It draws a reader in and lets them know that the story will be fast-paced and exciting. I'm not going to lie, I'm not usually into first person POV, but I think that you made it work really well and it helps the reader get into each character's headspace better than third person would have.

Of all of the lines, I think that this one is my favorite; "We lock eyes, but I don’t see a killer. I see an angel sent to perform divine execution on a maggot with a long, overdue list of unrepented sins." Idk there's just something so raw about it. I'm a sucker for metaphors and this one put an image in my mind. To me it's one of those character defining lines where you just get a sense of their personality through their voice/thoughts and I think that that's really cool.

NP: I have original stuff in my library and fanfics on my Ao3.

i'm reading silver chips, and WOW it's fuckin amazing!! your repetition in this story is so useful for building both the scene around you and the almost dizzy euphoric feeling of the roller disco. in particular, my fave line is "The roller rink is just that circles within circles within circles, an endless plane of spinning and rotating and spiraling." I love how you show bellazhanna having fun with her friends, finally owning up to her humiliations as you put it, and just.. allowing herself to be free underneath the fractals of light!!! ESPECIALLY the run-in with the teacher at the end - seeing her accept herself for everything abt her, good and bad, is just....... MWAH PERFECT. overall, amazing work and beautiful imagery <3

SapphireBatWings

NP: here is your list of options :3

1. broken canon and prose (just one chapter is fine <3)
2. two slow dancers
3. black friday
4. finding life in death
5. crimson ties

angeliic_gestalt

I just finished reading Crimson Ties, and I just wanted to say something, and that is I like the way you write dialogue and actions here, it makes the literature full of life and well, character, you really know how to make stories flow so well and take the time it needs to, it makes it feel like you put all the love, care and effort into this one-shot. If I had to pick my favorite part, I think it has to be the start of it, especially this part "pain helps people to grow, as she’d seen herself over the years" It just really is interesting to me, it's hard to explain why this part's so interesting but it is in a way!

My second favorite part was when reverie opened the jacket, revealing the gratuitous amount of ties inside, and laid them out on the bed with the snap of her fingers, it just gives of some fancifully magical vibes (in a great way at that!)

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This is just a literature answering/explaining the lore and stuff about the universe my webtoon takes is set in, a bit of a warning, some of the chapters have bright backgrounds and potentially sensitive topics, please proceed with caution

understandably for lore-related works, it goes pretty in depth with the world. what i do enjoy most abt it, tho, is its varying scopes of sorts! from talking abt bigger overarching things like species and ability systems to smaller bits like kongphobia and q&as. the chapter “(DON’T) Follow Your Heart (seriously don’t do it)” is pretty interesting with how dreams and ambitions can become a crime. surely this has no moral repercussions! surely!

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@np: comedy or (mild) tragedy. take ur pick

manual bump…

LocalSnowi

"He remembers how he got those. At night, he had taken someone behind bars in the accursed town of Salem." So props for setting! I do love the Salem era--one of the most fascinating eras of history in my opinion. I also love a good vampire story. Just everything about this concept is really cool. On the same note I very much enjoy how this story talks about his scars one by one and how each comes with its own flashback; again, super cool concept!

"Under the dark clouds of a thundering rainstorm, they traded blow after blow, and a swipe of her spear cut across his face." This is probably my favorite sentence in the story. There's just something about it that really establishes tone and adds to the atmosphere. I can very vividly visualize this in my head so that's super cool.  

"Tapestry of tragedy" is such a cool phrase. I really love that. It has a nice ring to it. Overall, I enjoy your prose and the way that you describe emotions specifically. It's very intense and compelling.

NP: I have original stuff in my library and fanfics on my Ao3.