A Warlock's Demons

8 months, 10 days ago

Mild Violence

Kazu muses on his current state of being.

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It didn't take much to cause Kazu'ran to get that restless and confined feeling. Friends becoming busy or outright disappearing, events becoming rare or nonexistent, and his favorite hangouts being closed more than they were open.. It all meant that the troll spent a lot of time at home. A lot of time in the basement, mostly, reading his stolen books and bonding with his demons. He'd thought it was something he'd have to keep hidden, but it turned out that it was very standard behavior for a warlock. He'd been cautious for nothing and hated himself for it.

How much time had he wasted with being so careful and paranoid? On this, on everything else? Why did he even care anymore? It wasn't like anyone was going to hold him accountable for a damned thing. They all knew what he was becoming, but nobody batted an eye at it. Not even the few demon hunters that he knew. Hell, if Jarisold was allowed to walk around and even be the headmaster of a college, then Kazu could definitely get away with more than he already was. He brought a hand up to run his digits through his hair. Briefly, his fingertips paused at the twin bumps that were starting to bulge just within his hairline, knowing that someday the skin there would split and reveal the horns-to-be. He hadn't told anyone about them yet, and none of his mates had noticed. It was fine.

Sighing, he moved to tie a length of rope around the ankle of one of three dead blood trolls that were currently shoved in the alcove at the back of his workshop. Bheephom -- or 'Beef', as he affectionately called him -- stood nearby, panting, eager for the meal that would soon be placed in front of him. Kazu gave him a soft little pat-pat before pulling the other end of the rope, hoisting the ma'da up, and guided her over to the massive basin just a few feet away. With a practiced motion, he drew a blade from his pocket and cut her open, sighing as the crimson liquid flowed freely from her and fell into the container below. Messiest part of his day. But he needed the blood for his potions, and Beef needed his food. Thank the loa that blood trolls were plentiful and unwanted.

He trailed a finger down the face of the ma'da, quietly amused at remembering her look of terror when he'd dropped down onto her from above. He was very sure he'd broken her neck on impact, making the process so much easier. Strangled her, just to be sure. The male blood trolls that had seen him coming had all fled; many from that village knew of him one way or another and knew that they would simply be left alone as long as they let him go for the ma'das. It was a chance of freedom for those that wanted it. Those that tried to fight, well.. they just ended up in the pile. A shame. Some of them were cute. Granted, some of the ma'das were, too, but he found it impossible to let them live, let alone befriend one. Not with the assault on his loa all that time ago that nearly erased him from existence. He held a solid grudge. And Bwonsamdi was always happy to get the souls, of course.

The warlock waited until the basin was filled an acceptable amount before bringing the body back down. It was unceremoniously tossed onto the slab in front of Bheephom, and the felhound quickly got to work, tearing the flesh and consuming it. The bones would be saved, either to use as decor or to be ground down for potion-making. He favored the skulls in particular, but the ma'das rarely had sizable tusks worth putting on display. As he tied up the next body, Voltik scurried over to try to take a bite of the body that Beef was tearing into-- and was promptly chased off by the larger demon after managing to score himself a finger. Kazu spat out a comment in Demonic, and laughed, hoisting up the body to drain it like the last one.

The gentle clicks of hooves on stone caused his ears to twitch and swivel, though he did not turn his head. Gentle, clawed hands wrapped around his midsection after he tied the rope to its anchor, and he rumbled, looking back at the incubus that had snuck up behind him. He was a new addition. Or rather, a substitution. He was an easily-swayed idiot. Too scared to keep his succubus around.. but this literal winged twunk? All the same dangers, just wrapped in a more masculine package? Yeah, alright. This, too, was fine. The incubus gave him a squeeze before wandering off, murmuring something soft and flirty in Demonic before he was out of range.

Kazu smiled to himself, though it didn't last long. His mind drifted over his current state, and his past. Sure, yes, he had loving mates and a healthy, happy child. But he was still a warlock. Still a disappointment to his parents-- or he was at least very sure that they were disappointed in him. Not like he could ask them. Or ever could have. He had barely gotten confident in his abilities before their deaths. And so many times, he'd wanted to quit. For them. Even if it wouldn't bring them back, maybe it would have brought him some peace. And yet, here he was. A room full of demons, blood, bones, corpses.

His gaze unfocused as he mentally slipped back into the past. The taunting laughs of the orcs that had basically peer-pressured him into researching fel still haunted his dreams. It had been his fault. He had gotten too good at his studies. His 'friends' had gotten jealous and made threats when he refused to share his research with them. 

He could still see the broken bodies of his parents, the life long gone from their eyes, being kicked about by the bigger of the orcs. Everything after that had been a blur. He only remembered gazing very intently into the similarly-lifeless eyes of every single one of those orcs before he pushed them out into the open sea to be devoured by the deep-sea predators that lurked below the waves.

And yet despite all of this, he couldn't let go of the power. He couldn't bring himself to be anything but a warlock.

His hands began to tremble, only to stop when Beef got up on his hind legs and pushed his bloodied snout into Kazu's palms. He began to pet him almost automatically, sighing out a breath that threatened to pull his soul out along with it. Could a demon be an emotional support animal? Beef was surely trying. Kazu undid the rope holding up the second body and tossed it on the pile for the felhound, his eyes still vaguely unfocused as he sat on the edge of dissociation.

The troll deeply wished he could be literally anything else.