SOLEIL HYLTHARROW 𖤓

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Cocoa Hooves (Stripped)
Glass Animals
0:04 3:35


SOLEIL HYLTHARROW
BISHOP OF THE COVENANT

Oh, how lonely the sun must be — the moon has the stars, while it only burns everything that gets too close...

I don't believe I'm of a good heart
PERSONALITY
integrity
empathy
temper
confidence
rationale
sincerity
sociability
optimism


⟣ — If the felines of the Wastelands were a spectrum of wondrous hopes and bright ambitions persisting in spite of the desolate reality they reside in, then Soleil Hyltharrow would be akin to that of a distant, fading dream. Drifting through the physical world yet almost disconnected from the present itself, this split-face feline exists forever as a solidarity figure amongst an otherwise close-knit community; the mournful spectre of the forest, characterized by a perpetually dispassionate visage and an inexplicable melancholy that cascades from every wisp of their being and emulates from every word softly spoken. Lengthy interactions with them are rare, for they avoid the company of others as would a rabbit flee the howling of wolves, yet oftentimes can leave those involved with feelings of mild impatience, for although they try to treat everyone with civility and kindness, they have an unfortunate tendency to get lost within their own introspection during the middle of conversations and thus, become terribly oblivious to social cues and even momentarily forgetful of the other participant’s very existence. Indeed, the creature's mind is an absolute enigma to all, a winding woodland shrouded with a fog so heavy, the only way to navigate this labyrinth safely would require the forest’s blessing itself.

⟣ — Upon first glance, the feline gives the outward impression as warm-hearted yet unapproachable, intelligent yet impulsive, courageous yet ultimately forgettable. Compared to those with personalities vibrant and charismatic, their distant presence scarcely leaves a noticeable impression upon the minds of others; a curiosity, and little else. And yet, hiding behind mist and haze glows an incandescent flicker bursting with ferocity and determination, a predator lying in wait for an opportunity to strike, a rebellious warrior beneath the guise of a dutiful healer. Of sharp-tongued remarks and unwavering resilience in spite of being someone broken, beaten, and damned, perhaps the most intriguing of Soleil’s characteristics are their beliefs — though such things are cloaked in closely-guarded secrecy, disguised by false prayers and mild-mannered murmurs of agreement. The final echo of their progenitor, a ‘heretic’ is what they would undoubtedly get labeled as should the iconoclastic thoughts privately mused upon be unveiled to their congregation — a title they shall wear with bitter pride.

⟣ — In a similar fashion to the other colonies’ reproachful perception on the rather… unorthodox religion of The Covenant, to say the least, the creature views their group’s oh-so dearly coveted deities as nothing more than monstrous abominations, hellish beasts mindlessly killing for little reasoning other than twisted instinct rather than saintly gods deliberately blessing those devoted and purging those unworthy. And yet, neither do they place value in the concept of burying the deceased so the souls may return to the earth like the residents in The Caballada and Fort Cathmore, for even believing in such matters like ghosts and spirits is something they personally refuse to partake in, nor do they merely think of The Covenant’s worship with simple dismissal, for the collective scorn of both factions combined is naught but a feeble spark in comparison to the wrathful flame of hatred towards all faiths festering within this single individual, a pyre which only festers and grows in intensity with every moment spent alongside the deluded worshippers of the Unseen. Disconnected, they feel, from the vast majority of their fellow colonymates, so faithful as the masses are, and although they are in a respected occupation within the allegiance, their loyalty towards the Covenant is a truly minimal thing indeed.

⟣ — Raised with the expectations of acting as a mere tool for creatures of a worthier purpose, they are both unshackled and chained; a masterless puppet. Liberated from the clutches of their former overseers, and yet, if one had been so adamantly controlled by the wishes and whims of others for so long, how could they ever be expected to stand by themselves once those strings had been cut? Indeed, Lyssa had crafted a fine weapon, but without guidance, without a reason for existence, so dementedly fitting for one with such a namesake that Soleil would be a frenzied helios, continuously destroying themselves whilst it burned within a confinement unable to restrain such ferocity. For although they maintain an outwardly impassive demeanor, to describe them as level-headed is as much of a truth as saying mice could take flight — that would imply some resemblance of stability in their psyche, after all. No, it was the fleeting things known as emotions, rather than the collected sensibility of logic and rationale, which ultimately guided every decision and move — and their emotions were volatile.

⟣ — Through infancy to bishophood, it has only ever been them and the claustrophobic headspace of paranoia, worries, and nightmares known as their mind struggling to keep their barely-understood feelings in check. Anxiety, they possess, a constant flow of catastrophizing thoughts and unfounded fears haunting their mind with each inhale and exhale, and when such turmoil overwhelms their senses, and the torrential hurricane of pent-up emotions imprisoned within rises to an unbearable crescendo — to describe such an occurrence as a cataclysmic explosion likened to the extreme force of an inferno ravenging an overgrown forest would be an extraordinary understatement indeed. A wildcard, truly, contradictions and unpredictability is the essence of their character. The terrible consequences that have resulted from this — Soleil is continually horrified of themselves, of what they have done, of what they have yet to do, but still, as unchanging as the rising and setting of the dual celestial planets, their tempestuous heart commands the actions of the helpless marionette that was the very animal it kept living.

⟣ — For as incredibly flawed as they are, Soleil still harbors some share of doubtlessly positive qualities, softly-spoken whispers and gentle smiles achievable despite the ceaseless displays of cruelty and horror witnessed throughout their life. While they bear plentiful similarities with the innately destructive nature of the sun, so too lingers warmth. In some aspects, a short-fused impatience and unfortunate tendency to react violently upon even mild provocation are the results of an dysfunctional youth, yet in other manners, said background has additionally instilled within them a determination to at least try to treat other individuals with the compassion so achingly absent in their past. Regardless of allegiance, open-mindedness greets all who encounter the split-faced feline, and individuals who manage to earn their tentative trust might bask in the comforting light of their — admittedly awkward, but incredibly genuine — company. And while they scarcely feel a particular passion in the art of medicine at all, stepping into the duty of a Bishop solely in order to protect themselves — and potentially other non-believers — from a ranking of a elevated status, Soleil still strives to utilize the highest quantity of effort in healing and caring for their patients as best as virtually possible in the legacy of Ianis.

⟣ — And yet, inside them, as integral to Soleil’s existence as the beating of the life-vital organ within their ribcage, seethes a beast of glittering teeth and hooked claws and eager eyes, of a primal hunger shrieking a wretched choir for scarlet fluid and mutilated flesh, of something horrid that dreamed of the sweet satisfaction of murder. Their bloodlust was something cultivated through days upon days of talons slashing across their body, lacerations cutting through their tissue, toxic manipulation poured directly into their skull. A weapon of violence forged from agony and ichor, the blade would forever be still sharpened, poised to attack, forever dripping with crimson regardless of their attempts to dull it with shame and solitude. The feline would never seek battles, but when their tongue tasted iron and pallid claws punctured skin and that oh-so intoxicating adrenaline flooded their veins, the instincts that were so carefully encouraged would always sing with sickening euphoria. In another reality, they could have been sinless and intact and well, yet the possibility of emerging from despair as someone ‘good’ was instead slaughtered by the very figure who ‘loved’ them. But what else could they have done? They were so young when they were destroyed and sculpted back as this masterpiece of a tragedy.

⟣ — In truth, Soleil Hyltharrow is nothing more than a tortured animal trapped in a cycle of violence and regret, a terrible consequence of the generational trauma tainting their lineage, imprisoned everlastingly by anxieties of a frighteningly visceral degree — a poison that infected their very soul itself, refusing to allow their psyche from ever truly reaching the bliss that was peace, for relaxing would surely cause their broken form to crumble at the mere gust of the wind. The wistful possibility of breaking free from this repeated torment is obtainable, a truth they are painfully aware of, yet denial, self-loathing, and uncertainty chains their being from enacting that first step. All they have ever done was bring harm to others; they were a beastly thing ruined and tarnished, someone destined to burn those close to them, disintegrating into soot and smoke at their touch. They are selfish, they have to be, in order to continuously wallow in remorse yet never improving themselves, equally loathing and relishing every opportunity where their bloodlust runs rampant, to allow themselves a few connections to ward off the loneliness despite how certain they are that everything will inevitably unravel because of them.

⟣ — Was it truly worth the effort to try, when they would surely remain alone in the end?

Memories of my past are a constant torment...
HISTORY

INFANCY

⟣ — The tale of Soleil Hyltharrow could be described best as a tragedy in every essence, and yet as sprawling as the complete story is in its entirety, this here shall only be a simple — and temporary — summary of the events which shaped them into the tormented individual they are at present.

⟣ — Born to Eclipse Hyltharrow and sired by Flicker, the latter of whom perished weeks before his situationship’s pregnancy had even been realized, Soleil would be raised beneath the indifferent gaze of their lone guardian. Eclipse’s history alone was interlaced with religious zealotry and familial bloodshed, and while they truly did try to care for their only daughter with love at the very beginning, a virulent combination of underlying resentment towards the late Flicker, heavy disappointment towards the lack of giftedness displayed by the kit, and the unresolved trauma of his own past would all result in him abruptly withdrawing cherishment and consequently emotionally neglecting the young Soleil, who would never be told why her caregiver had suddenly stopped loving them.

⟣ — Eclipse would provide the bare necessities for survival, and nothing else — neither physical punishment and verbal insults, nor comforting affection and warm praise. It did not help that the single parent found great difficulty in gathering enough food for the two of them amidst competition from other strays in the area, so frequently would the malnourished child be left alone for great durations of time, accompanied only by her increasingly anxious and tumultuous mind, while he searched for prey — and even when Eclipse was present, tension festered ceaselessly in the air as he spoke only with frigidity and barely-veiled bitterness as she listened with somber silence.

⟣ — And then, the apocalypse struck. Soleil was six moons old at this point, and while the small family lived a fair distance away from human civilization, it was only a matter of days before she and Eclipse encountered an infected monstrosity for the first time. There is little recollection of that day, besides the memory of how she had ever seen her parent wear an expression of genuine fear rather than his typical emotionless visage for the first time in her life, but she does remember the feeling of the overwhelmingly powerful agony radiating from countless vicious wounds as the similarly injured Eclipse carried his daughter and fled the still-screeching beast.

⟣ — Drifting constantly between disoriented consciousness and complete unconsciousness, to this day Soleil is unsure how long Eclipse ran for in order to reach the shadowed woodland of The Covenant, only the memory of blackening out on the forest floor and reawakening inside of the abandoned church. Soleil would be confined to the Bishop’s nave for a moon to recover before officially starting her training as a pawn — though not before Eclipse would pull her aside and hiss a fierce warning to “resist their teachings.” Having been so far isolated from the members due to their injuries and thus ignorant of the affiliation’s faith, the young molly wouldn’t understand what her parent meant at that moment, but she would quickly come to realize upon meeting her new mentor, Lyssa.


PAWNSHIP

⟣ — A fanatical zealot who believed fervently in cleansing the Wastelands of non-believers in the righteous name of the Unseen, those holy harbingers ushering the world into a new era of brilliance by bringing souls to salvation through death, Lyssa viewed Soleil as a promising little thing to utilize in her savage crusade against those faithless and heretical. Trained as a living weapon, Soleil would be subjected to moons of savage abuse and horrific cruelty beneath the guise of “lessons.” Barbarity, it was, how Lyssa’s preferred method of forging a tool of violence was through days upon days of back-to-back sparring sessions and combat training, a full-grown knight regularly viciously assaulting a young pawn with unsheathed claws and sadistic delight, where so incredibly frequently did cuts and bruises need to be concealed after hours of merciless brawls.

⟣ — Worse, Lyssa taught extremely minimally in the art of hunting, so when she commanded Soleil to cease taking prey from the communal fresh-kill pile one day, the young molly was forced to depend entirely on her for food. Through silver-tongued words and venomous manipulation would the mentor try her best to indoctrinate Soleil fully into the Covenant’s religion, preaching constantly about the divinity of the Unseen with vibrant language and sweetly-spoken coos, and although she had grown up listening to Eclipse’s persistent scorn towards religion, she would outwardly accept such teachings with numbness.

⟣ — It was towards the end of Soleil’s pawnship when everything fell into place and shattered in a horrific apotheosis, when their mentor urged them — who had since realized their identity after one solemn conversation with their parent, the first in moons — to follow her deep into the winding woodland in order to ambush an unsuspecting Eclipse, who Lyssa had observed as lacking in devotion, when their parent and their mentor fought each other whilst Soleil watched on in horror, when they instinctively prevented Eclipse from killing his opponent — and in doing so, granted Lyssa the opportunity to swoop in and execute the traitor herself.

⟣ — It was as Eclipse released a final, choked breath that the rapidly-brewing emotions of Soleil reached the breaking point, and something finally clicked. in their mind, and they turned to face their true enemy. The battle between them and Lyssa was a sanguine-stained dance of life and death, of shrieks and utterly ruthless attacks, of bitterness and wrath and twisted satisfaction, where the bloodlust instilled by Lyssa within Soleil had finally been realized in its gloriously violent entirety. And in the end, the split-faced feline stood alone amongst the corpses of their only loved ones, and screamed.

⟣ — Upon returning to the church, heavily wounded, through sobs and wheezes would they manage to convince the rest of the Covenant that Lyssa had attempted to slaughter both them and their parent in cold-blood, and how they were forced to kill her in self-defense after Eclipse had been horrifically struck down before their eyes. Once again, Soleil would be required to remain healing within the Bishop’s nave for a moon — yet this time, they weren’t alone.


BISHOPHOOD

⟣ — Ianis served as a Bishop of the Covenant through the reigns of two Overseers, and still remained alive during the third’s. The two had spoken previously a few occasions prior, in brief interactions when the wounds inflicted by upon Soleil during their mentor’s sparring sessions were major enough to render the typical act of brushing them aside an impossibility, yet always had such conversations between patient and healer been limited with Lyssa always close by to ensure nothing substantial was revealed. Now, however, with her death Ianis could finally talk with this peculiar little pawn in complete peace for the first time — and through tentative chats and gentle reassurance did he realize two things; just how broken Soleil was, and how he wanted to help.

⟣ — It was a rather immense difficulty, building even a semblance of trust between him and the horribly traumatized adolescent, who had not received genuine kindness from an adult figure since the earliest moments of their life, who only knew neglect and abuse from those who were supposed to support them, and thus reacted to Ianis’ support with the immense wariness of an abused mutt towards a held-out hand. Yet trust was being built, steadily and gradually, so when he offered a chance to study under his guidance in the ways of a Bishop, for it was “a path away from the violence which knightship inevitably brings,” Soleil accepted cautiously, and the pair’s bond only solidified and strengthened from that point on.

⟣ — There was another Bishop as well, one by the name of Filigree, yet he was entirely too devoted to the Covenant’s faith from the perspective of one who had suffered beneath religious fanaticism, so they rejected his presence as a secondary mentor entirely in favor of exclusively training with Ianis, who they would learn lacked faith in the Unseen; a contributing factor to a future decision of theirs. Things were far from perfect, yet things were getting better — which only meant it was an inevitability when their life was ruined once more.

⟣ — The titanous beast of rotting sinew and sharp bone seemingly appeared from thin air despite its enormity, impaling Inais with a twisted crown of impossibly colossal antlers in a mere blink of an eye whilst him and his pawn had been both searching for herbs and investigating reports of trampled plantlife at the territory’s outskirts only a week after Irin’s demise. Soleil could do nothing but watch in stunned silence as thick streams of blood began to spurt from several puncture points before the mutated cervid flung the speared body off with a single swing of its massive skull and disappeared into the shadows. Already was Ianis dead when they reached him, and when they clutched the carcass as though embracing their cherished teacher for a final time and began to weep, just as when Eclipse and Lyssa had died, in the tenebrous depths of the forest did their shrieks remain unheard by all.

⟣ — The tiny feline would graduate incredibly soon after despite having only trained as a Bishop’s pawn for five moons, pushed to fill the vacancy left by Ianis with immediate haste. And it was during their assessment, as they watched the helios start to rise above the horizon in solitude, perched at the very top of the tallest pine they could locate with tears silently dripping from their eyes for those distant and wicked and tender who had been lost throughout the course of their existence, was a choice made. After experiencing the horrors of the Covenant’s twisted worship and in honor of the non-believer who had shown them hope afterwards, while the Overseer hailed them as a full Bishop upon their successful return to the church, Soleil Hyltharrow would resign themselves to a life as a sworn heretic in a colony of devotees.

Truthfully, there's not much to my life
TRIVIA
  • Physical combat.
  • Moths & butterflies.
  • Privacy.
  • Religious zealots.
  • Deceitfulness.
  • Their occuptation.
  • Collecting insect wings.
  • Lone patrols.
  • Singing alone.
  • Being watched.
  • Emotional attachments.
  • Themselves.
⟣ — A canvas of lovely sunset pigments interrupted by flowing patches of charred ebony, Soleil holds the appearance of ash settled across a desert floor. Streaks, not unlike the sun’s rays, cascade across their body, darkening all it touched into caramel as though tastefully sun-kissed, while sections of their legs, chest, and muzzle were lightened with creamy hues of vanilla until it almost shone with a lambent glow. The feline could be considered as something of a beauty, where a petite stature and rounded features provided a unique contrast with an athletic physique and lean musculature. And yet, the most captivating characteristic of the creature’s appearance was a feature that always caught the interest of strangers: their visage.

⟣ — The right side of their head was as one might expect: a base of pale copper painted with intricate russet stripes, similarly to the rest of their pelage. The left side, however, spoke of a completely different story, for it was almost as if the half of another feline’s face had been stitched seamlessly onto the original. Likened to a perfect half-moon, abyssal shadow shrouded and divided an otherwise warm countenance, where only an outline of tawny around the eye stood out amidst the black. Forward set in the Soleil’s cranium stare wide, unblinking orbs coloured a vibrant golden akin to the very helios above. Two curious points of intrigue was the vicious bite mark around the right, engraved near perfectly into the creature’s skin and astonishingly close to the eye itself, as well as permanently mismatched pupils thanks to head damage from moons ago, where the right pupil is destined to forever remain as a thin sliver regardless of the environment’s illumination.

⟣ — Much of the feline’s coat consisted of thin, wavy fur that presented itself upon their body in the form of mesmerizing ripples, but rather unusually, delightful curls blessed the darkest areas of their body, only intensifying the difference between the light and the shade. The longest parts of their pelt was at their neck, where ink trickled down their throat and rested over their shoulders like a silken scarf, and their extensive tail, which trailed behind them like living twine and ended with a tuft akin to those possessed by a unicorn. Soleil Hyltharrow carries themselves with adept grace and carefulness, yet if one looked closely, a constant tension besetting their muscles would be observed, as though the feline was constantly on-guard, ready for an attack. This paranoia never made itself apparent in their expression, however, an everlasting impassive deadpan it was; emotionless yet, in a strange manner, serene.
  • Soleil has a Spotify playlist! Link here.
  • Similarly to their parent and their lineage from that side of the family, Soleil is a naturally gifted singer. They don't often use this talent to its full potential, but they do like to hum little tunes when they're alone. Very occasionally, during the day, kinmates may faintly hear them sing from outside of camp — mournful and hauntingly beautiful.
  • Their voice claim is Melinoe from Hades 2.
  • Despite their position as a healer meant to remain pacifistic, Soleil's most guilty of pleasures is fighting, something which was realized in their final battle with their mentor. It's one of the few situations they can wholeheartedly concentrate in, and as someone who's incredibly listless in life, they enjoy feeling like they have an objective — no matter how temporary it may be. They hate how much they relish the few brawls they've been in.
  • In a theoretical "The Magnus Archives" AU, Soleil Hyltharrow would be an avatar of The Slaughter. The day they killed their parent and mentor would've been their metaphorical avatar death.
  • They share their parent's response of acting extra passive-aggressive and subtly sarcastic towards anyone who irritates them.
  • The one of the few hobbies Soleil has is collecting moths and butterflies. It's one of the few things in their life that brings them a hint of joy, and their free-time is often spent hunting the bugs down. Their collection is what decorates their nest, and as a bit of humor, they make sure all the wings with "eyes" point directly outwards, surrounding them, to creep out others.
Loved ones, best forgotten
RELATIONSHIPS
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My child, in another reality, we could've been great...
“He... He never loved me. They couldn’t have, not when he changed from a doting guardian to a complete stranger so quickly, so naturally. It was all a lie, but despite knowing that… I wish I could still be trapped in that facade. Isn’t that silly? I — I’m rambling again. Even though he was cruel and horrible and didn’t care for me at all, I… A tiny part of my heart still loves him, maybe. Or maybe that too is false, a lingering hope that the sliver of love I had was reciprocated? Or perhaps to make myself feel even guiltier over… ”
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.....
“When I was young, I had asked about my father a few times. The first, Eclipse had merely scowled and muttered in a foul voice how he was “a fool they had humored”, and that was that. Later, I was told that Flicker was his name, and that he died weeks before Eclipse found out that he was pregnant. They had said he was kind. Would my upbringing have been better if he was by my side? …It doesn’t matter. He died long before he could save me from those two.”
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My lovely pawn! Quiet, but the potential... It's marvelous.
“An interesting character, wasn’t she? I had loved her with every drop of my soul, back when I was an pawn. Now? It's easy for me to say that I loathe her, and what she did to me. Well — it’s… more complicated than that, but that’s not as easy to explain. I didn’t realize this back then — or perhaps I did, and I was just in denial — but mentors aren’t supposed to beat up their pawns with their claws out every day as ‘training’. …No, I think Lyssa’s attempts to make me into the perfect Covenant member only led me further astray from the Unseen. Ironic, isn’t it?”