I hate feeling like this, but there's not really anything I can do about it, Especially since I know it was unintentional. Maybe I just gotta stop making things about me, and assuming people have a problem with me.
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This thread is locked indefinitely. TH doesn't really need an excuse to create more negativity than already exists on the site. Goodbye!
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way more than a couple times lately i find myself apologizing to everyone
what is happening
am i just becoming more of a failure in even just communicating with friends
i just want to be able to have fun normally
It's a nice night out, so I wanted to head out and just look at the stars for a bit. I open the door, and am assaulted by the scent of skunk. Not going to test my luck in that arena. =/
I honestly just feel... so inadequate. My boyfriend takes such good care of me, spoils me, buys me flowers and cooks for me and keeps our apartment clean and goes to school and lets me freelance and follow me dreams of being an artist... and every once in a while, my dumb brain will remind me "oh yeah, you need to actually act like a girlfriend too" and I'll do something tiny like put away dishes or give him a neck massage or make him some basic food that requires no effort, and he acts like I'm doing something huge and like I'm this amazing person and it kinda just makes me feel worse about the fact that I'm so checked out most of the time. I just wish I was a better girlfriend, I wish I could focus and that I considered him and what would make him happy more often. I know he isn't necessarily unhappy, I know he loves me and thinks I'm just fine, but I feel like he deserves so much better and like if I don't pull my shit together, eventually he's going to realize that too.
I stilll can't fucking believe I declined that job interview....... to make things even better the internship I was holding out for is apparently for the summer........... of next year??? Did they just copy n paste some old ad??????? ohhhhh my god I want to kms that was an actual entry level job why the fuck am I so goddamn STUPID
Please stop insulting me whenever I'm in a bad mood, pretty sure calling me a "bummer" while I'm pretty pissed off isn't gonna help.
I just fucking got told "nevermind" like I don't even matter at all twice today and it fucking hurts. I didn't want to hear that again rather they meant it that way or not because the first time I heard it today already meant it so I to hear it again just,sighs, I'm sick of being treated this way by the people I think wouldn't do this to me. I just want to be shown and told I'm important too, is that too much to ask? People always say they hate being treated that way or want the things but then they don't do it or do the thing they hate. Sighs.
I think my little brother is abusive, he follows the cycle near-perfectly. He's always beating me up both physically and emotionally, giving me false apologies, then doing it again. I don't know what to do, I don't want to get my parents in trouble but at the same time I'm a minor so I can't take things into my own hands... My parents refuse to see that it's not my fault, even when he brandishes knives and threatens my life... Some days I think I should write a will and an autobiography or account of this because I know it can only end one way...