Jin

"I'ma fuck up my life"

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P E R S O N A L I T Y 

Jin grew up pretty awkward due to not having any friends and barely a relationship with his parents, but at heart he's a good person. He likes to look out for and protect others, and when he does establish close friendships with others he's sure to take good care of them. Raum and Sammy are two close, reckless friends that he has and he often has to run after and take care of them. Jin however does have a habit of succumbing to their behavior as he's not perfect--say he'd go over to one of their places to make sure they clean up or are eating right, but he finds them smoking or marathoning shows on netflix instead of going to work. Jin would give them hell over it but time and time again he finds himself sitting down and smoking with them, or eating up all their junk food and throwing his plans out the window for the day. He tries to be the mature one and someone you can depend on, but most of the time he simply doesn't have the answer and gets sad overthinking, feeling he isn't capable of being depended on. 

He does have a lot of anxiety, mostly about if he looks or sounds weird when he talks to people or if they get the wrong impression of him. His expression is naturally gloomy, and due to his face and dark colors and how he dresses he often comes off as a dark vortex and like an angry/mean person. He used to be a lot more welcoming to strangers and want to make friends, but as time goes by and his cards were dealt, he prefers to stay close to his few friends instead of venturing out more. That's why it was so hard for him to get close to Gin; He was new, and while Jin immediately liked him a lot, Jin still hadn't gotten over his aversion to touch and had to work up to something as small as holding hands..slowly. He still doesn't like strangers touching him WHATSOEVER, but when someone he cares for touches him he feels just fine. It can even be comforting to him, something he seeks out when he's stressed. 

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"I'ma fuck up my life
We gon' party all night
She don't care if I die"

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B A C K G R O U N D (WIP)

Jin as a child wasn't fond of being held or touched in any way by any one. This included his parents, which caused a lot of emotional turmoil for the small family as Jin was their first born after years and years of trying for a child. It wasn't out of malice, Jin still loved being in the presence of his parents and seeked protection, kindness, and love from them-but he would sob and cry when he was held for more than a few moments. Growing up, his parents tried to seek help for their son, thinking he may be sick or there may be something psychologically wrong with him; He often stared at nothing for hours on end, seemed to randomly cry as if he was scared despite nothing being around, and made attempts to talk to thin air. When evaluated as a young child (around 4-6) he said he saw people in his home and they always wanted something from him. He explained that when someone touched him, he felt sick and he felt like he was in danger. The 'people' in his home told him he was special and that he was a vessel-but that he was in danger. They would tell him that he should go to sleep and try to leave his body so that they can come in and suffer for him. Jin didn't trust the voices and often grew scared of them. 

He was born with the ability to see, communicate and later grows the ability to control spirits and entities in his realm and in purgatory. As a kid, being from a very religious home, his parents believed that he was schizophrenic and were heartbroken. Jin realized that when he spoke of the 'people in the house that no one else could see' his parents grew unreasonably upset and made him go to the doctor. He didn't like his therapist, doctors or psychologists because they analyzed him for hours and hours on end when he just wanted to go home to his parents. He quickly learned that he wasn't normal and these things he told adults--weren't normal. He decided that he would pretend he didn't see them any more and stop talking about them, even if he had to lie. 

It worked for awhile, but his parents always seemed to keep a too-close eye on him. He wasn't allowed outside and was always told to stay inside, unable to socialize with the neighborhood children until he started first grade. (He didn't go to preschool or kindergarten and instead was taught beginning math and language at home from his father-a scholar in language and history.) 

Jin was excited to go to school as he felt that he wanted to reach out to other kids his age and make his first friend. Watching cartoons and movies gave him the impression that he'd make a solid group of close friends and they would embark on life together. However school became yet another issue for him as he suddenly developed seizures, sometimes once in a blue moon and sometimes daily. The trigger was unknown to doctors as Jin said they happened out of nowhere, but he knew what caused them. The spirits grew angry with him that he wouldn't give up his 'vessel' and forced violent imagery into his head of his family and himself being hacked up, tortured and murdered. This was a shock to Jin as a kid, but as the years went by he became numb to many things like gore and death. He was ostracized by other students due to these seizures and sticking out like a sore thumb-his gloomy expression often pushed many away when it was just his normal face. At this age, despite being numb to his parents being hard on him and generally being alone, he retained a happy personality that took everything with a grain of salt and figured tomorrow would be better. However as years went by and Jin found it increasingly hard to make friends, he realized just how alone he was. The only company he had were the spirits that littered the streets, and he had enough of their games by now. 

Elementary school and Middle school were lonely years for him as he wasn't able to make friends-for a few reasons from his seizures to his habit of staring at girls that he'd have crushes on. He wouldn't approach them, just..stare and smile. Clearly that didn't sit well with anyone :v He got a job his last year of middle school and decided that he should move out as quickly as possible due to his parents failing marriage. They seemed to argue a lot, mostly about Jin and what they should do to 'fix' him. 

In high school, things seemed to look up for him. He had hit puberty a bit late but had grown taller, more handsome and while he was a bit socially inept, he still was a good person at heart. Though at this age he was balancing his grades and work, he was excited to actually make a friend or two. By this point he'd mainly spent time online and had met a friend or two but had never met them online. One friend, Aspen, was a dark web enthusiast and the two were rather close. By high school his seizures had come to a stop as he was able to block any images from spirits from his mind; He'd spent much of his time online and in old bookstores trying to find as much information on his ability as possible. He didn't so much want to control his ability, he wanted to get rid of it. 

Despite being awkward, he tried his best to upkeep friendships and relationships and even went to parties. He had developed severe anxiety from his childhood and frankly, was depressed from how lonely he was and how he seemed to be a disappointment to his parents. He tried to keep a positive outlook, reading that the worst thing you can do is succumb to your demons. He did try. 

Around this time in his life was where he began to experiment sexually; He was too awkward to ask anyone out but figured out that people messed around a lot at parties. His solution? Get drunk and let whatever happen, happen. He figured out that he simply..didn't have the drive he thought he should have had when having sex with girls, but with guys he was more emotionally and physically inclined. So, he was gay. It was a realization he'd keep to himself..though with that realization, he also realized he had a problem with getting hard enough for sex. With girls this was an awkward situation, but he understood that with guys he could opt for the passive role and there wouldn't be an issue. Admittedly it made him quite nervous and afraid that there was something wrong with him, and after experimenting with a few guys he was too embarrassed to continue and left it at that. His issue stemmed from his life of depression and anxiety and now had an even bigger anxiety with preforming good enough for his partner. gr8

Once he lost his virginity he pretty much became a horndog and all he thought about was sex, sex, sex. This was an issue as he was too embarrassed to have sex but too needy to abstain from it. 

After high school, he had been living on his own for about two years. His parents marriage was saved-it seemed that the only thing keeping them apart was--well. Jin. Their disappointment uvu. Jin tries to keep in contact with them, but his texts go unanswered and they either aren't home when he visits or they simply don't answer the door for him. This broke his heart as he truly did love them, but he accepts that they must not feel the same. 

As if his bad luck simply hadn't run out for his lifetime, Mako soon finds him (having heard that there was an exceptionally powerful esper, as they're rare and usually stay hidden--which Jin had no idea anyone would know who he was, but there are eyes and ears eeeverywhere. uvu.)  and enlists Jin to work under him as an Esper. Jin wanted absolutely no part in this, but seeing Mako and his team--he didn't really have a choice. He was practically kidnapped from south Korea, from the only life he'd known, and brought to Russia. He was trained under the Magik division and Jin was to track and hunt witches and necromancers specifically because they use souls in their magik.

Mako and Jins relationship was anything but peaceful. Jin had no idea he was immortal, and Mako showed him time and time again that no matter how many times he'd kill him-Jin would come back. This was the hardest time in Jins life-he was forced into a foreign land, forced to learn abilities and information on how to kill, forced on a schedule he wanted no part of. His freedom was stripped from him completely. Mako was also in a dark place at this time and often took his frustrations out on Jin. The reason being that Jin reminded Mako of himself when he was younger. Dealt a rough past but refusing to let that make him a bitter person. Jin tried to remain a good person and wouldn't let anyone take that from him. 

Not even Mako. 

While initially he was absolutely terrified of the Clans soon-to-be-ruler, with time and support from no one else but himself, he was able to stand up to Mako. It took a lot of time, and dying, in the process, but Jin refused to give way to this tyrant. Jin was often given orders to track witches, give their locations and find their 'nest' or 'hut' where they were staying. Then he was to be back up if it was needed-eventually he was asked to kill them. Which he refused. He didn't want to kill anyone, he didn't want anyone to be hurt because of him. He began giving false information, tried talking Mako out of the missions and if he was forced into a battle between a witch, he would do what he could to let them run. Worst comes to worst, he'd just die and come back tomorrow a failure. A failure according to Mako, but to himself, he was proud. He couldn't help but feel that his life was meaningless due to the fact he couldn't die, and if he had to die again and again it was no biggie. Just another day. Years later he snaps out of the habit due to Raum smacking some sense into him. 

Mako eventually does come to terms with Jin, even growing fond of him and growing respect for him as a team mate. Jin helped him realize that the way Mako chose to carry on his power as the head hunter of his clan didn't need to fester and take form under his fathers shadow. Mako does eventually step down from his tyrant role and lets Jin go to the States to build a life for himself again. Unable to return to South Korea, (Mako had Jin declared as 'dead' and destroyed all of his identification papers, so if he were to return and try to get a job he could be sent to jail for fraud) Jin settles down and tries to piece a life together for himself again. 

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"Yeah you bet I know that she ain't
Never give a single fuck about me
Yeah, you bet she know that we ain't
Never gonna be together, I see"

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R E L A T I O N S H I P S

Raum/Sammy:

Gin:

Mako: 

Ram/Caries: