Godot's Links
Tallest husband, beloved Nim!!! He is the most practical out of the three of us, the tallest, the best at fighting, the one with the most freckles, the most likely to carry me around places. We’re all still adjusting to this new situation, but Nim makes sure we keep a good outlook on things and stay grounded. He also gives such nice hugs and is so secure to be against. Being against him is one of the safest feelings in the world. I still feel like I have a lot to make up for, but I’m starting to think that the best way I can do that now is by being as present and available as I can. I just want to do right by him and love him as much as he deserves. (He deserves so much, he is an amazing man, so good, so kind, so hot, so safe, so gentle!) We used to go out drinking together, but my new typing is awful for this. Will I let this stop me? No. And I know Nim will not make me feel bad for having to recalculate how much alcohol I can manage. He is supportive and good like that. There are a few things we need to settle at some bars together, after all, even if going out anywhere will be greatly reduced. Note: How long have I had feelings for Nim? What's the timeline? I had such a big crush on him after he talked to me on the field during the war. Before that, I was a bit intimidated, but it's hard not to be! He was my commanding officer, very good with weapons, and he had me practicing with his little brother. So easy to get intimidated. But when he talked to me about what I could work on and asked me to help with troop placements... Oh, that was too much. How could I not fall for the tall, handsome commander who valued my opinions and cared about my progress in things? I didn't expect anything to come of it since, really, look at who I am and who he is, not to mention the superior officer thing. But, Ellie found a way to make it happen and to bridge that gap.
Dot and me have been through a lot but we’re in a good spot now. It’s. A lot to adjust to, but it helps to have someone here adjusting with me. He’s always had a lot of potential for things, and I’ve always Tried to support him in the endeavors he wanted. Which. Well. He hasn’t always wanted healthy things for himself. And I didn’t quite realize how bad a situation that would put him in, and how willing he was to suffer for an ultimately useless goal. I don’t think even he knew until he killed me for it. Dot actually needs a lot of support from others or he has a tendency to fling himself into situations where he tries to handle things on his own, and it needs to be restated and retold because while he never really forgets anything, he is good at ignoring the fact when making snap judgments if it hasn’t been said recently. …he’s gotten a bit better about that over time. And he’s finally letting others take care of him more these days too. Which I mean, I’m very ready to give him some care after the last decade we’ve had. He deserves that.
Most graceful husband, beautiful beloved Ellie!!! Ellie is the kindest, most selfless person I know. He is maybe a bit too selfless sometimes, putting his own wellbeing on hold for the sake of others. It’s the sort of person he is, though, and I love him so much. I wonder if that will get a big more managed now that he has Nim and myself around almost all of the time. They both keep threatening to spoil me, but honestly, isn’t Ellie the one that needs that even more? Still, I love and appreciate everything Ellie does. I don’t understand how so many people write him off as only nice! Do they not spend enough time with him or something? We have so many funny little jokes and references together. We’ve had them since we first met years and years ago. Like, how if he needs me to do something that I absolutely do not want to or cannot do, all I need to do is get very serious and say, yes, of course. Here, I need you to do this for me. And then go gather any laundry that needs washing. It’s worked far more times than it should have. I’ve known Ellie for such a long time, but it’s only now that I’m starting to realize just how protective he is about the two of us. Even if it’s just rumors and gossip. Luckily, there’s so few opportunities for that these days. Ellie’s also one of the most caring people I know. He’s built his sect into such a good place with the help of his family. I want to help him with his goals, too. I want to find a way to help him, even in this state. I don't deserve either Ellie or Nim. Not after what I've done. I try very hard not to think about that, but I literally killed Nim and hurt Ellie and lied to him through omission for ten years. I don't know if I'll ever feel good about my life, but that's not important. They want me here, so I will be here. I love them, so I will be here. I just wish it felt like I deserve this second chance.
Dottie saved me when I needed it, and I fell for him very quickly, though I didn’t get to act as much on it as I would have liked. Circumstances kept being bad. I didn’t quite realize I wanted both him and Nim until I really got to see them together later, but things just kept getting in the way of me acting on anything until after the war where I.. ended up finally doing so in a very forwards manner. While drunk I’m very glad Dottie eventually told me about it, because it ended up solidifying it into an actual married bond of sorts. even if it couldn’t be official, it could still be real.
…
A lot happened. and I’m not entirely ready to face it just yet, but Lin and Wit managed to get them both back to me.
I couldn’t deal with losing both of them, it broke me rather badly.
I love Dottie so so much. I want him to be happy. I want to make sure he knows he’s loved. I want him to stay with me. he’s so so important.
I never disliked Solomon. Maybe people would say I should have, seeing as he is the only child father's ever wanted. But, in truth, we're both caught up in an awkward family situation and trying to make the best of it. I was content to keep my distance from him until Jasmine started to talk to me more and get Solomon to visit now and then. I know his mother is not happy about that, but with Jasmine pushing for us spending more time together, she can't say no. My brother is rash and does not think things through, but he has a good heart and genuinely wants the best for people. He just needed a bit of guiding from his delightful wife. I am looking forward to helping balance him out a bit in decision making as well. If there's one thing I'm good at, it's thinking things through. We'll make things work! We just need to hold out a bit longer.
One of my Father's.. many. iligitamate sons. we're the exact same age, which is still odd to wrap my head around. He's certainly a complex individual, but he's very good at what he does. Jasmine.. seems very convinced we need to get along better, which. I don't have any reason to repute, and, looking back, I think my mother was trying to keep us apart on purpose. Why? He's fundamental to the sect now, that's becoming painfully obvious. Why has- Something feels.. wrong about how buisness is being constructed here... I don't think he'd tell me yet if I asked though. I'll... I'll keep working on it.
My favorite brother-in-law. Little Min had to go through so much. I put him through so much. I never stopped to think how things would hurt him ahead of time, and I didn’t manage to do the right thing for him while I was alive. I’ve got more chances now. We’ve both hurt each other and ourselves a lot. I’m ready for that to stop happening. I want to go back to being honest and talking about art and how he managed to get free dessert at a restaurant using one simple social hack. I’m ready to spend time talking again.
.....
Godot was always really supportive of both my interests, and me being myself, and I really. I really apprecaited that and amired him for being really impressive with all he did, and how he could wedge my brother into being a little less overbearing with sabers and-
And I guess that's why I never saw what was coming until it was far too late.
I hated him for awhile because of that. and he left me with incredibly nasty internal sect problems involving- it just made me more upset. Did you know?? Did you know what killing him would do to me? I don’t think you did. I didn’t even know. My sect is so so complexly built around its dead.
It took awhile to figure out the scope of things, traveling helped. Things got easier internally but kept difficult overall.
And then I got my revenge and it wasn’t anything like I wanted. So we got you out and fixed up now and it’s better. A lot better. I got my brother back and we’re a lot more level with eachother and it feels closer to how it did at the start, I’m really glad for that.
Kunal! Kunal, why are you sending vaguely threatening letters now? What am I supposed to say to these?! This is not the letter writing etiquette we went over in the past! Is this how all of your letters have been? Kunal, this is-
He... Uncle Godot was- It's really complicated right now. He did so many things, and- And it's so hard to reconcile the man I know with the one I keep hearing about from the rest of the world. I've come to the conclusion that I can't get to the bottom of my feelings on him alone. I really just- I can't. But, no matter what, despite it all, I refuse to believe that he was bad. I can't bring myself to hate him. I just feel so sad right now. I keep thinking over the last days I was with him before everything got uncovered. Just stupid little mundane things, too, like what we talked about and him asking about how the night hunt went and it's all so- ... It makes my heart hurt. So I have to get to the bottom of this. I have to settle my emotions.
My little brother. He’s painfully insecure about himself and his abilities and hates speaking up for himself. I guess that’s the work of the family I sent him back to. I’m not sure I’ll be able to forgive myself for doing that without checking on what kind of people they were first. No matter what Mort would lead others to believe, he is an intelligent, caring individual who is clever and good at problem solving. He doesn’t give himself enough credit in general. I won’t stand for it. He deserves a lot of credit! Mort, you are generous and thoughtful, sharp and thorough, and you deserve so much more than the world has given you so far. I’m so proud to have you as my brother.
Godot cares about me a lot, and he thought he was doing the best for me when he sent me home, and I know that now, it's. My fault I didn't tell him otherwise but I thought I had dissapointed him and deserved that. He got very upset when he found out. Then he got ripped away again for awhile. I.. I asked Wit to give him his memories back, and now he's spending time with me, while.. he recovers a bit. I can't do much for him other than.. just be there, and I hope that helps. I want to help him feel better about things. I don't know how to do that.. but he's... very important to me.
I... I should have done more for you... found some way to lead you in a better direction rather than just accepting the help you offered. You truly were talented and you deserved a lot more than you got... It's awful to feel like you're never good enough... But the ways you went about it caused so much harm. I ended up embracing that. It's not a pleasant feeling.
Godot is truly a great man. He does good for and yet also understands the nature of the world. He remembered even one such as me, and I respect him greatly. I’ll do my part to help him however I can.
My brother-in-law, Esy. He’s one of the few people who understands some of the social trauma I’ve been through. Maybe that’s why I decided I could trust him with helping me work through some of my issues? Whatever the reason, he’s been a huge help and a good friend. It’s still strange that he has my brother’s body, but Mort doesn’t have any regrets and Wit had no say in matters when it happened. It’s nice to see the sides of him Jasmine used to tell me about. He’s sharp, considerate, and looks for ways to improve the lives of the people around him. Very impressive, very nice to spend time with. Might also need someone to pull him to the side and get him to stop helping people for a few minutes soon, but I think he gets more of a pass than me since he’s been dead for thirteen years. He must feel like he has a lot to catch up on. New game to play: leave him coded notes in various places around the recesses that I know he will interact with and see what happens. You know, just for fun.
Dotters! Dragon-lover-in-law haha. Inicially we just sort of never really interacted much, since he was off with the older brothers all the time, and only came around during the war which meant I was dark stupid at the time. but THIS lifetime I got to see and unwravel his rather horrifying downfall, and.. actually got to help pick him back up from it. There were a lot of reasons for it but I was content to just help him get back onto his feet and to his loved ones... didn't expect him to ask me personally for additional help but hey, I'm decent at navigating people, and he super needed a new perspective leaver to sort out some of his bad trauma. side effect is I know him suuuper well now, and we got prety close! which is really nice. We are a lot alike when it gets right down to it, which is intresting! and probubly pretty dangerous for the Cloud Recesses as a whole, ha!!
One thing I KNOW I can count on is that Senior Fairy is looking out for Kunal, even after all of this. I picked her for many reasons including her kind determination, her thoughtfulness, and her genuine care for others. Hopefully she is managing against most of Peony alright...
Smart Uncle's great! I'm so happy he put me in charge of protecting the young master when he was Sect Leader. I hope I get a chance to talk with him again since he's back now.
I hate you I hate you I hate you, why don’t you love me, why don’t you care, what did I do wrong?? I want to tear you apart I want you to die again and again just like this I hate you-
You were a political necessity after the war and I've already heard enough about bringing you in, you better not make me regret it, understood? You're only here because you are useful, you will only remain as long as you are useful.
Now go make sure that cat isn't causing any more trouble!
I'm never sure how I'm supposed to feel about Cultivator Melissa. She's been very clear that she does not like me at all. She has insulted me to my face. She has gotten me mad enough that I was willing to fight her. And yet, she's helped me in the past. It feels complicated. However, I'm not overly fond of her brash style in general. Every time she has a conversation with me, I feel like I'm being punched with words, even when she's being polite. Though, more often than not, she is just yelling at me as if she knows my life better than I do. Not that I anticipate dealing with her ever again.
What... a weird person to try and navigate. It feels like most of the time we're at best Cordial , but sometimes, we find something that we can go on about together for hours? It's *really* weird. Otherwise he feels stuffy and standoffish. Then he just. Went off the deep end? Not long after he got badly hurt. It was a pretty terrible time for everyone. I didn't quite get the full story on how he died, but from what I understand it wasn't great. But... somehow we can relate on just enough things that even now I GUESS he's invited to the wedding. Again, I don't get it either.
Back at it again with trying to help Sincere figure out morals and navigate being something more than a wrathful, spiteful being. He already has the WANT to accomplish this. Not because he thinks it's right or anything, of course, but? He has someone he cares about a lot. And sometimes, that's what it takes to start being a better person. Sincere is the first kid I failed to help, despite thinking I was doing my best. I can't make up for that, but I don't like seeing him so unhappy while he's trying to actually change.
Okay. FINE! You get to help since you now like me? For some reason? You used to hate me and now that I'm dead you're just fine? With me? I don't get you but it's been...nice..
Whatever I'll just accept that you don't hate me now even tho I don't have a clue what changed.
Older sister... We didn't get a lot of time to know each other. I wish we had more. I don't- ....I don't think I'll ever see you again, but hopefully life treats you well. Father did a lot of damage to you, too, but you found ways to deal with it. I respect that.
Man. What the hell, dude? It hurts to see family die but like-- you were kind of awful about it. What needed to happen to stop you from going off like that...? :/ Whatever, it's whatever. We could have been friends if you weren't up your own ass.
I'm pretty sure I said plenty in the temple. I might have been in a terrible mindset at the time but he's just- he's very hard for me to deal with. I don't think we speak the same sort of language at all. Ugh...
I just- I don't know what to say about him. I'm mad about a lot of things he did, but- ....the way Kunal's taking things... It has me hesitant. I don't know what to say to help him, either. So I guess I'm just going to shut my mouth about him until Kunal and Hamin start talking more, since they're the two people I know who get to have the strongest opinions. Lin, do not interact.
Jasmine is one of the kindest and sweetest people I have ever met. She has a gentle strength about her that reminds me a bit of how Ellie deals with others. She achieves things through kindness and genuine care. Properly meeting her and talking to her made me realize just how much I wanted a connection to my family and how much I want to be close with everyone here and be accepted. Jasmine is one of the few people I feel comfortable being open with. We've spent a lot of time together in the kitchen, sharing favorite recipes. It's so relaxing and always a nice time.
He’s such a hard worker and such a good cook! If Solomon is going to run this sect he needs to be connected to his brother, and I’m going to push that. My silly husband is getting cooking lessons from the very best! but even aside from that, he’s a wonderful and interesting person to have gotten to know. I know we can turn things around here if we work together!
My brother-in-law who is most likely to kill me. Even though he's not the one who accomplished this, I still feel that vague threat every time I see him and I am quite sure that is lasting for a long time after what happened. I... I have no idea how to fix that and right now I'm just... I'm so tired... I don't want to try solving complicated social puzzles right now...
Never understood him as well as Munim. Talked a lot. I feel like I'm learning more about him now that he is dead. I do not know what will happen. I do know that Wit is planning something.
My older brother. I am sure father had a heavy impact on him as well, but he hides things a lot better than his twin sister. I know what that's like. Either that or he found a good way to avoid the damage Father brings to every child he comes in contact with. Really, both options are very impressive. I enjoyed meeting you. I don't think I've ever had someone get so worried about my wellbeing so quickly. I hope your cultivation is going well and that you have had many interesting adventures. I'm sorry we can't meet again, but maybe that's for the best. I'm sure you've heard nothing good about me recently, and things are going to stay like that for a while.
Okay, what's weird is that. We're actually pretty similar in personality, he just decided to be a workaholic while I take it easy. He's very much the face of the town and the face of the trio he works with. Lex is attractive, but Godot sounds like he knows exactly what to say at any given moment as not to wrap people up into promises they can't keep. I just wish that he didn't live like a hobo in his office bedroom , it's kind of sad.
Melissa says he's gone and lost his head, but if he's panicking then I doubt shouting at him will bring him in, come on, Melissa, I could have told you that!
I don't know how this newly discovered younger brother of mine manages it, but he is talented at saying things that hit me right where it hurts. It's not his fault. He's curious and young. It just hurts sometimes. Mort told me I don't need to be responsible for him. That I'm allowed to focus on myself and getting better. But, it turns out I'm very stupid when it comes to my family members and little Newt is causing Mort quite a bit of stress. I want to make sure he's squared away a bit better on that front, at least.
He had a lot to work on too when I first met him. He's getting much better now! He got to go back to his people! He deserves that. I hope he'll still come by sometime tho. I think Mort does better when he's here for reading time.. I have sooo much to tell you the next time you come by! I picked your name for me! You picked a really good one just like you did with Sin's X3
I love my mother so much. She was my support growing up and she gave me so much love and care. She wanted the best for me, and I wanted the best for her. I used to wonder what she would think of Ellie and Nim, but I'm pretty sure she would have loved them. Which... is nice to think about.
My brilliant, talented baby boy! I love him so much! He is kind and clever and works so hard. He's going to become a powerful cultivator someday, I know it.
Shuu is an old friend of Ellie's who I like spending time with. I think we each have a lot of things we both regret doing and are trying to make up for, but we don't talk about them with each other much. Which. It's nice. I know I ran into him years ago, but it feels like he's one of the few people I can be open with and get to know without apologizing to for years. Shuu is one of the few people in this world I have not personally hurt. He's getting back into Cloud Sect training right now which is... tough. I cannot help you with this, Shuu, I am so sorry. I can only offer you moral support and music to help you through these challenges!
My dear nephew, Jules! He's a sharp young man. Very clever! Sensitive as well. He seems to pick up on other people's feelings and try to mitigate damages from there. It's something I'm sure he'll grow into. Right now, I'm sure it's a challenge for him, since he has his own feelings to work out as well. We cook together a lot and we talk while we cook. I know he has a lot of questions he isn't asking, and I'm sure I'll have to answer them someday, but... It's nice to just have uncomplicated discussions while making something nice in the kitchen.
Uncle Godot... I really look up to Uncle Godot! We tend to spend a lot of time in the kitchen together, and that's where we talk about everything, from recipes to politics to gossip. Dad used to seem a little uneasy about me spending time with him, but he's relaxed a lot lately. There's a lot of things I wish I could ask Uncle Godot about, just... I know I absolutely cannot.
Ah yes, my darling niece. I’m happy to play whatever role you need of me in your grand saga. Though, perhaps I can convince you to take a step back now and then and figure out the story of Amie as well. But, for the time being, I don’t mind being The Puppeteer. All brave heroines need something or someone to push back against, and so! Princess Friedel, while you may weave the threads of fate, how fare thee against one who pulls at those threads for mine own amusement? Thou art powerful indeed, but dost thou have the valor and mettle to best one such a myself??
Hark! Thy ancestor of dark sorceries sees fit to test my own skills against his. He is truly skilled in all manner of fields but I shall not falter!! I shall prove myself worthy of the position I hold!!!
I have so many emotions about my little niece. She's so serious about things in a way that only little kids are. I once watched her walk along and pick up acorns for an hour with a look of grim determination on her face, as if the fate of the world rested on picking up those acorns. She wouldn't let me help out because she was making the three of us a special surprise. (It was acorn soup. Just... acorns in a bowl of water with some leaves.) I don't feel like there's much I can teach her, but that's alright. I can just enjoy having her around and seeing how attached she is to Nim. ...that makes me a bit sad sometimes, but just for a second or two. The cuteness of the situation always wins over any sort of regrets.
My littlest uncle! Littlest uncle taught me how to balance a ball on my head and said I was really good at it. He's really smiley, but sometimes he comes out and watches me practice with biggest uncle and he looks kinda sad. He always makes snacks when we visit, though! He's my secret uncle.
I am absolutely terrified of running into Severus. I don't think I want to know what his thoughts on me are these days. Actually, I'm terrified of that knowledge. I think I might die if I found out. Are ghosts supposed to get stomachaches? I think I'm getting one just thinking about this. Collectively, we have one living relative who fulfils a guardian or parental role in any of our lives and that is Severus, and I nearly killed his nephew by dying and did kill his future nephew in law and--
I don’t know what I expected, but it certainly wasn’t all of that. Looking at everything now, I believe you were sitting at the edge of madness, toeing the line for a great many years. I suppose now we will see the true person you have held underneath that weight you’ve carried and hidden behind. I take solace in that his love IS genuine and pure for both Munim and Lex. Their support has pulled lex from possibly a very early death. He was rapidly approaching that state despite any of our efforts… Munim coming back did help slow it down, but this one put an actual stop to it. I don’t see him too much, either of them, but I deeply appreciate them continuing to give my nephew his reason to live.
I have no idea what to say to him! I know Jia a bit from before, but everything is much more complicated now.
I've talked to him a number of times before his death. I'll be honest, I could NOT have predicted any of this. I haven't seen much of him now that he's staying here. I ran into him once a few weeks ago. He scrambled back into the shadows before I had a chance to say anything. I haven't seen many people come back as a mimikyu... Not the happiest thing to come back as.