Vervainstar

WARNING: This character's profile contains content that may be unsuitable for some readers.
This character has a dark past (and future).
Please only continue reading if you are not sensitive or made uncomfortable by these topics:
Fighting, Gore, Animal Death, Poisoning, Manipulation, Gaslighting, Generational Trauma

.•Name•.
Vervainstar (Current)
Vervainshade (Warrior/Deputy)
Lavendergaze (Medicine Cat)

.•Gender•.  
Male

.•Clan•.
Oak Clan

.•Mate(s)•.
Shiverstrike/Shiverstar (Previous Mate)

.•Family•.
Lightstep (Mother), Halfheart/Halfstar (Father)
Antumbra (Sister)
Erminefang (Son), Ferrettuft (Son), ??? (Daughter)

.•Theme Song•.
"We Must Be Killers" By Mikky Ekko
"Bad Habit" by Black Pistol Fire

.•Shortlist of Descriptors•.
Ambitious, Traditionalist, Headstrong, Tough, Protective

.•Personality & History•.
Born as the only son to the fearsome leader Halfstar, he had large paw steps to fill from birth. Named Lavenderkit from his unique eye colour and his scent of flowers since birth, his father feared that his name would mean that he would end up being soft. While his sister was born as one of the smallest, docile, cats the clans have ever seen, Lavenderkit was one of the largest and strongest but that didn't stop his father from being especially hard on him even as a kit. Lavenderkit was highly competitive, often hurting his den mates to prove himself as the strongest, most resilient, and even cunning of his clan to his father who already had high expectations of him. While he was no doubt ambitious and full of pride, he was also trying to protect his little sister Antkit who was always a target from others in the clan due to her size and lack of strength. Even her status as the leader's daughter often wasn't enough to protect her from the harsh tongues of her clanmates.

It came as a complete shock when the clan's medicine cat Snailpelt demanded that he was to train as her apprentice. The clan thought for sure that Antkit would have been their future medicine cat, and Halfstar was anything but thrilled with Starclan's decision. After trying to reason with Snailpelt, he gave in knowing that it would be impossible to argue with her. Lavenderkit, now Lavenderpaw was forced to become a Medicine Cat. He struggled with the decision that had been made for him as he didn't have the paws or patience to work with herbs. Despite Snailpelt's warnings, Lavenderpaw managed to convince his father to continue training him as a warrior in secret with the hope that Snailpelt would give up on trying to train Lavenderpaw. 

In the middle of a chill winter's night, the camp was infiltrated by a surprise attack from Birch Clan. His father had threatened them at a previous gathering for hunting on their land and Birch Clan didn't take too kindly to it. His mother, Lightstep, was killed in the battle. While Birch Clan insisted that it was an accident and was just trying to stand up for themselves with the only way Oak Clan would understand, Halfstar felt as though they knew what they were doing and intentionally murdered Lightstep to get their point across.

The death of Lightstep hit the family hard in many ways. Not only was she the only one who was able to reason with Halfstar and keep his temper under control, but she was also heavily respected in the clans and had kept them at peace for many moons. She was often regarded as the mediator of the clans and with her gone it only sent the four clans to turn against each other. Without her by Halfstar's side, the clan was at great risk of being torn apart by him and even more so with his increased grief as he grew hard and lacked the compassion needed for him to properly care for his clan. His training with Lavenderpaw grew more difficult and dangerous as he was left unchecked without Lightstep to step in or talk him out of anything. He stopped trying to hide his training from Snailpelt and would often get into arguments over training with the she-cat as he was making warrior training for Lavenderpaw more of a necessity. While Lavenderpaw had little care for herbs and poultices, he did take an interest in the more dangerous herbs that grew in and around their territory. Belladonna, Oleander, and Vervain (which looked much like the Lavender plants he was named after), were of great interest to him for use outside of healing. He was very interested in learning about their properties as a fighter and warrior, trying to figure out the best strategies in how to use them against his opponents in battle. While this made Snailpelt uncomfortable, she was at least glad that Lavenderpaw was taking some interest in her work and was starting to hold onto some of his medicine cat knowledge that she was teaching him.

With a paw in two worlds, Lavenderpaw was drawn more towards the life of a warrior, but his role as a medicine cat became important to him due to the knowledge gained not only from the herbs and medicines he was learning, but from the half moon meetings with the other clans. He made a deal with Halfstar that if he continued to share this sacred information with him, that Halfstar would fulfill his wish of making him a warrior no matter what Snailpelt said or did. His warrior training lessened (much to Snailpelt's relief) and he worked hard at trying to learn everything he could from Snailpelt so that she would finally have no choice but to make him a full Medicine Cat.

His sister was made into a full warrior, however she didn't pass her warriors assessment. Halfstar still made her a full warrior, but not even he would give his daughter any exceptions. She was named Antumbra, as even as a medicine cat apprentice, Lavenderpaw outshone her in every way and she was and would always be in his shadow. While Lavenderpaw had no say in this decision and even tried to change Halfstar's mind, it drew a rift between him and his sister. Lavenderpaw knew that he had to continue to be strong enough for the both of them to protect his sister, even from his own father as his pain took over him. Despite her small stature and lack of strength, she had managed to at least win over most of the clan with her ability to talk others through their problems and was always able to cheer anyone up who was around her. She spent a lot of time trying to talk to the other clans as well, trying to feel useful as she attempted to fill her mother's previous role in the clans. The only cat she was unable to reason with was the leader of Birch clan, and her own father. 

A few moons later, Lavenderpaw finally became a full medicine cat. He was named Lavendergaze, receiving the name from his mother in Starclan when Snailpelt wasn't sure about Lavenderpaw being ready to receive his name. The other medicine cats were weary of the decision as well, especially Birch Clan's medicine cat, but they weren't about to disagree with Starclan's decision.

However, Lavendergaze also was shown a vision from his mother once they were away from the other medicine cats. He found himself being taken away in a rushing river. At first it was slow and easy, but it was lined with cliff faces on either side of him that were impossible to climb up. The further he got down the river, the faster the current became and he could barely lift his head above the water to breath. As he poked his head above the surface he saw the river split into two, the torrent being more difficult and dreadful up ahead of him which led to a torrential ocean and the other path heading towards a completely calm lake with barely a ripple in the water. As he tried to swim towards the still waters, he noticed snails clinging onto the cliffs around him and floating in the waters. They stuck to his pelt and the clinging of the snails in his thick fur made him heavy and his paws unable to move him in the direction he so desperately wanted to go in. He was pulled under, tossed and turning in all different directions of the water as the river met with the ocean. It thrashed him about as if it was unable to make up its mind until everything fell still. All he could do was hear his mother's voice whisper in his ear to "Find the Shore" before he woke up beside the other medicine cats. 

The vision swirled in his head for moons along with the echo of his mother's voice as he tried to make out the vision that he had. He felt as though the vision was for him and him alone, and as each day went past he grew more and more suspicious of Snailpelt. The two rarely saw eye to eye as is, but Lavendergaze couldn't shake the feeling of the snails in his fur from his vision. His sister was trying to tell him that he should let go of the past and to "find the shore" within his new future as a Medicine Cat, but he couldn't help but feel as though he was meant for better, greater, things then sorting herbs all day and healing minor wounds. Against Snailpelt's wishes, he dove into his research on toxic and poisonous herbs and flowers and even used his medicine cat title to spy on Birch clan to plot their next attack. The two clans were constantly at odds with each other since that first battle, attacking each other over the slightest disagreements. Even at gatherings it was impossible to prevent the two from trying to go after each other's throats. In each battle, Halfstar would get Lavendergaze to test these new methods on Birchclan while he was healing their wounds. He would report back to his father which methods worked best and for what. He learned what he could from Roseclan too, pretending to be incredibly interested in learning their talented medicine cat secrets from Talis while investigating the dangerous plants and herbs that grew on their territory as their form of defense. He started growing his own plants and herbs in secret away from Snailpelt, knowing that if she found out his cover would be blown. 

Lavendergaze was almost even enjoying his new job, yet that changed when his sister Antumbra told him that she was expecting kits and how she regretted the father of them. The father was a Birchclan tom named Crookedfern, and the son of Birchclan's leader. Feeling as if she didn't belong in Oakclan because she wasn't as tall and strong as the Oak trees that surrounded them, they became friends and often met up in the forests above the border. He was strong and handsome, he promised that he would protect her, that her strength was simply in different places... and she fell for it. She had been meeting with him for many moons, even before her mother's death, and he was one of the reasons why she felt the need to take up her mother's role within the clans. She didn't realize that he was also using her to gain information on Oakclan, and how he played a part in the battle that led to Lightstep's death. When she found out that she was expecting she tried to hide it from him, even finding a new mate in Oakclan and trying to pass the kits off as his. But Halfstar was more proud that he was about to have grandkits and was one to brag about how his legacy was strong and would continue after all. She knew that Crookedfern would be after her clan and her kits, especially with the knowledge that the Birchclan deputy was old and Crookedfern was the next most likely deputy to be chosen for the clan. Lavendergaze grew restless, wondering when Halfstar would keep to his promise of letting him become a warrior so he could protect her.

Yet secrets can only stay secret for so long...

Lavendergaze and Halfstar were discussing which flower to use in their next planned battle against Birchclan. It had been over 12 moons since Lightstep's death, yet Halfstar still wanted his revenge. While he wasn't about to risk his sister's secret, Lavendergaze mentioned that the best way to get revenge would be to go after Crookedfern as he would likely be the future deputy and clan leader of Birchclan. Approving of this idea, Halfstar planned on hurting Crookedfern enough to be injured only for Lavendergaze to mix Vervain and Marigold into his wounds when "trying to heal him" as death berries would be too obvious. They didn't realize that Snailpelt had overheard the conversation and tried to run off to warn Birchclan, but it was too late. Halfstar dragged the old medicine cat back to camp. She begged Lavendergaze to help her and he nearly did until she let slip that she never should have betrayed Starclan. Before reaching the camp, Lavendergaze demanded that she tell him everything, although he already felt like he already knew what she had done.

Snailpelt explained that when him and his sister was born, she had a prophecy from Starclan telling her to guide him in the right direction. She also felt in her heart and knew that Starclan wanted Antumbra to be the future Medicine Cat of Oakclan, but she feared that Lavendergaze would be headed for a dark path if she didn't take him on as a medicine cat apprentice. Even as a kit, she saw his ambition and hoped that having the title of a medicine cat would be enough for him, while also making it so that he would learn to heal instead of harm others. She didn't realize that turning him into a medicine cat would give him access to cause more harm to others, and that she had made a mistake in understanding Starclan's messages. Now that they were planning on murdering a cat on the battle field using the same teachings that she had taught him, she knew that she had made a huge mistake.

Halfstar and Lavendergaze didn't take this very well. While Lavendergaze just had his suspicions proven and was upset over Snailpelt's meddling with his future, Halfstar was even more furious that his medicine cat had lied and betrayed him. He tossed the old she-cat into the clan camp and called a clan meeting. To make an example of what would happen to those who betrayed or lied to him, he forced her to eat the pile of Vervain that they had gathered for Crookedfern. Lavendergaze begged his father to let him help her, as while what she did was inexcusable, it was not worth killing her over as she had served Oakclan for many many moons as their medicine cat despite this secret she had. The only words his father said to him and his clan was
"Lavendergaze, you have suffered the most under this cat's paws. You were never meant to be a Medicine Cat. All of those moons, you should have been training to be a warrior, and you have proven yourself as one despite training in the medicine cat den. You will continue to use the knowledge that you have learned from Snailpelt to train the next medicine cat, and utilize your skills as a warrior of this clan. As my first words of advice to you as the future deputy and leader of this clan, you cannot give mercy to those who deceive you. From this moment forth to signify this change in your future, you will now be known as Vervainshade." 
Halfstar forced the clan to watch as Snailpelt lost functions of her body and eventually passed painfully while holding back his son from being able to help her. The clan was forced to cheer Vervainshade's new name over Snailpelt's lifeless body, and while Vervainshade mourned that his mentor had turned out to be a traitor to himself and his clan, he was glad that he finally would become the warrior that he dreamed of being and would make sure to live up to his father's expectations. 

Once Snailpelt was buried, Halfstar didn't waste any time gathering the clan and preparing them for battle. No one was aloud to sit vigil for Snailpelt due to her being named as a traitor. They struck Birchclan in the middle of the night and the plan worked, but Vervainshade started to wonder if following his father was the right path to take as he barely needed to 'patch up' Crookedfern after he was finished with him. He didn't bother with the vervain that night as he already knew that Crookedfern would pass from his wounds no matter what he did to try to help him. He also unfortunately met his sister in the process who snatched up her brother's body from him. She irritated him beyond belief, not only with her attitude towards him, but also how beautiful that he thought that she was.

Both clans took a large hit and the storm calmed for a few moons as both needed time to heal from their wounds. Antumbra had her kits safely, and as expected he received a sign that one of them would be his apprentice and the future medicine cat to replace him.

(TBC)