MONSOON

haughty, callous, and burdened by the pathological need for control, monsoon is a far cry from a nice fellow. it's not that he intends to be as cruel as they come, but a blighted conscience reinforced through training apt for a zealous warlord has steered him well into the suffocating clutches of apathy.

underneath a scratchy exterior lies a people-pleaser with a startling lack of autonomy. monsoon wants to live up to his namesake and the expectations thrust upon him by his (former) empire. a byproduct of past edifications, he, as much as he tried to deny it, was a tool of war, a tool of politics, not to be valued for who he was but what he represented. in his world—the only world—there is no room for inadequacy or failure.

hyper-critical of others and, more importantly (read: dangerously) himself, the imposition of unrealistic expectations has become as familiar as breathing. soo has seldom experienced what it feels to live life outside of a chokehold but he does not appear to wish for liberation, much less recognizes the opportunity to be free. the sickening shackles of perfectionism are comforting; monsoon, obstinate and hellbent, clings to the belief that he is the warden and not the prisoner with a borderline desperation.

in the simplest of terms, compassion and connection are not to be expected from a cat like him—in spite of his endless wiles and glamour, soo bears a large degree of social ineptitude that only an unholy amalgamation of privilege, deliberately taught ignorance, and masochistic, self-imposed alienation could breed. while a brilliant tactician and tyrant, comprehending the nature of others at the individual-level eludes monsoon: something he has expressed a repeated and deep-rooted resentment of.

even less so does monsoon understand his own thoughts and feelings. yearning for a closeness he simply cannot attain, his arrogance and hostility results from blind indoctrination, pent-up frustration, and a last-ditch effort in the name of dignity. soo does not despise the existence of his fellow beings—he genuinely enjoys the prospect of company—his quarrel is chiefly with his shattered sense of self and the society which both shaped and betrayed it.