Profile
"Everything that is lost will be given a name, and will not come back but will live forever."
- Safia Elhillo, 'Asmarani Makes Prayer'.
Basic Information
He/Him, They/Them. Bisexual.
21 years old. Born Sep, 9th.
5'11", 180cm.
Profile
Akarnai is a tiefling monk, travelling merchant and adventurer recovering from his past life as a former devotee in a religious cult. Having been previously taken in by a humble group, which oversaw the protection of the city, he quickly became enamored with the group leader, Feiyem. Growing close with her, she then indoctrinated Akarnai into their veiled practices. It was in this cult where his obsessive devotion festered into his self-destruction, as the contents of their faith sought to destroy him.
Through ego death, he seeks to pick up the pieces of his life, untwisting what he believed to be his faith, his love, and himself. His travels are also a recounting, a once-again exploration of how he serves the world now, as well as how the world serves him.
Personality
Akarnai is an extremely polite and soft-spoken man. Reticent and sheepish in social situations, he prefers to listen and follow directions. Still, in conversation, Akarnai is unreluctanly courteous, and is willing to help out anyone in almost any circumstances. Those aroud him regard him as a closed off yet generous man, and very few consider him an enemy.
Often misjudged as weak and a pushover, Akarnai is rather strong both physically and mentally. He is devoted to that he follows, strongest under the guidance of someone's hand. In action, he ensures nothing get between him and completing a task; while outwardly silent, his mind is loud and fortified.
Backstory
If given the chance to hear Akarnai's story from him, or be one of the five to witness it yourself, here is what you know. [CW: fantasy racism, self-mutilation]
Before everything happened, Akarnai was a travelling merchant, a cold and quiet man wandering around the world making ends meet with his simple collections. Around the age of 18, he arrived to a strange place with his brother, Ozaro. An isolated, circular-built city, constructed almost to be hugging itself. It was in this time and place that Feiyem, a bar owner, took the lowly merchant in. She tended to Akarnai and allowed him to join her group of 'city protectors', a humble group of four who sought to keep their city safe. Akarnai quickly fell in love with Feieyem, and she appointed him as one of her loyal guard-dogs, with their whispered relationship being kept behind closed doos.
As he falled deeper in love with her, they became eachother's most trusted allies. Soon, Akarnai was lead in onto their secret, the closed-off religion that their group holds faith in. Upon becoming the newest follower, he dove deep into his prayer, signing himself off to this faith and becoming entirely loyal. His love for Feiyem and his faith for the religion intertwined; these two devotions became more and more indistinguishable.
This faith, which Feiyem believed would keep their city safe, is supremacist in nature. It believes in the strength of humans over others, citing the tales of their deity as proof humans were the people fit to proceed the world. From this, Akarnai was stuck— being a devotee to a gensis that aimed to destroy him. His fidelity was trapped between love and destruction. He could only hide from his deity for so long, and as tensions rose in the group that followed under Feiyem's feet, he made a dire decision. He could hide his skin, eyes, ears, under a dark cloak, but his horns would always reveal him to his god. In his desperation, he attempted to sever his horns himself, only being able remove one before he passed out.
Tensions grew even stronger, and as the group destroyed themselves, Akarnai was the last piece left standing in their internal battle. In these final moments, Akarnai wished to sacrifice himself to his faith- to Feiyem- but she stopped him, allowing herself to be taken from rule in order to protect him. However, protecting him meant pushing him out entirely. Scarred, and without his heart or faith left to guide him, was forced to leave the city, and travel alone again. Now, without an identity or ego, the world is his living purgatory, unable to understand who he is or the world that's much bigger than knew.
Though, in fact, there is a lot to the story that obscures the truth. Click here to reveal it.1. His Horns
"Akarnai passed out while cutting his horns." This statement isn't incorrect, but doesn't reflect the full truth. For the most part, Akarnai's horns contain no nerve or blood vessels. The truth is that Akarnai had first severed his tail, and had begun on his horns, before passing out due to blood loss. It was a lengthy process of about an hour in which he spent slowly sawing through his horn, weak and dizzy from the grueling pain of his tail."
2. His Faith
"Akarnai became religiously devoted because of Feiyem" is not entirely true either. His parents were religious people, and even while Akarnai did not actually know who they worshipped, their devotion nonetheless put a strain between him and his family. He began deovting himself to the religion, for Feiyem, but also to repent for his misdeeds against his family.
3. His Brother
"He was forced to leave the city alone" Is also not true. He left with his brother, but Ozaro ran away from him very quickly after leaving. After Ozaro learned of all that happened, the tense apprehension he had towards Akarnai had snapped, and Ozaro no longer felt being around Akarnai. Moreso, Ozaro has always been uncofmortable around Akarnai to some degree, but what had happened here rung many alarms for Ozaro, so he fled.
Design
Akarnai has a tall, atheltic build. His body is thoroughly toned, with notably strong legs. His facial features are soft, with his kind eyes and smile maintaining his gentle expression. He has extremely dark black hair, parted to the side and often falling in front of his face. As a tiefling, he has a soft red complexion, with pointed ears and yellow sclera. His horns are long and straight, his right horn being severed and raggedly healed.
His clothes is composed of multiple layers, in which he takes off or on depending on the cirumstance. His tighest layer consists of a black bodysuit, covering his legs, torso, and part of his neck. With this, he commonly wears a dark cloth tied around his waist, a slit around the skirt part that allows for free leg movement. A sligthly lighter cloth hangs around his hips, which can be worn around the right shoulder, covering his abdomen. At most times, this clothing is accompanied with handcrafted wooden sandals and a wooden bead bracelet.
Over of this, akarnai may choose to don on an outercoat, a thick darkbrown fabric with hangs down to around his ankles. Sometimes, he may choose to wear his hooded cloak, from which he obtained from his time in the religious cult.
Akarnai's Playlist
(Spotify Version Here)► at dust • ゆうらん船
► Taken • Amy Vachal
► Why Do You Love Me? • Cocateu Twins
► The Woman that Loves You • Japanese Breakfast
► Reflection Nos. 3&4 • Vansire
► Your Name • Bernache
► Follow Me Down • Swallow
► Returns to the Orange Grove • Brokeback
