Jessie

STORY

Here is a not-so extensive list of the weird, wacky and bizarre adventures that Jessie had:

- When she was 8, she decided to explore an abandoned factory near her home. She accidentally activated a conveyor belt that led to a furnace and decided to use it as a treadmill, almost killing herself. She was saved when a loose pipe fell and broke the machine. Jessie gave up and went home after moaning about her 'fun being ruined'.

- Jessie joined a circus as a volunteer. She was assigned to help the lion tamer, but she mistook the whip for a toy and angered the lions. She ran away from the cage, but she tangled and tripped over her own damn feet and fell into a cannon that was about to fire. She was launched into the air miles away from the circus. How she survived is both unknown and amazing.

- When she was in middle school, Jessie went on a school field trip to Egypt. She wandered off from the group and entered a pyramid. She triggered a trap that released a swarm of poisonous scorpions, but she was protected by a mummy that wrapped itself around her. That same mummy used her to escape this pyramid - making Jessie the reason for a known missing mummy (that is still wandering about today).

- When she was 14, she backpacked across Europe. She hitchhiked with a truck driver who turned out to be a serial killer, but she escaped by jumping out of the moving vehicle. She landed in a flower field where she was chased by a swarm of bees.

- Jessie stumbled into a castle one bright day, discovering a secret meeting of vampires. She was about to be bitten, but she was rescued by a werewolf who had a crush on her.

- Jessie went to a casino in Las Vegas (after being told multiple times NOT TO by her twin brother) and gambled away all her money, but she won a jackpot on a slot machine. She was chased by a gang of thugs who wanted to rob her, but she escaped by riding a motorcycle. She crashed into a wedding chapel and is now enemies with a billionaire's wife and best friends with a billionaire.

- Jessie joined a reality show when she was 16 that involved surviving on a deserted island. She ate a poisonous mushroom and she hallucinated that she was a superhero. She fought a giant snake, but then decided to befriend it. She built a raft and sailed away, taking the snake with her. She proceeded to drift into a storm like an idiot. She was rescued by a pirate ship and became the captain after introducing them to Yahtzee.

- Jessie went to a haunted house on Halloween. She got lost and lead herself to a portal which entered, leading to another dimension. She met an alien and taught it how to dance Electric Boogaloo. She returned to Earth with an army of aliens, bending reality permanently.

- She (accidentally) became a spy for a secret organization. She infiltrated a villain’s lair, but she fell in love with Jessie. She betrayed her mission, but still saved the world by swooning the villain and convincing her to stop all evil and dedicate to 'their relationship'. She then proceeded to fake her death and to 'retire' from spying.

- Jessie has won 71 grammys. She has 0 musical talent.

- One day, Jessie slipped on a banana peel, but instead of falling, she phased into a parallel universe. She is met with alternate versions of herself who have the highest IQ humanly possible and know the answer to everything. What does she ask them? How much wood can a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood. She is now being witchhunted by 100 parallel versions of herself.

- Jessie is self aware.

- Jessie believes Noah's Arc happened, and that she built the boat. To spite her, her twin brother wrote, designed, edited, illustrated and published a version of Noah's Arc - replacing Jessie with Noah. It is one of the best selling books in modern day.

- Jessie has survived 16 plane crashes, she was driving the plane in 4 of these situations.

DESIGN

MOODBOARD

LINKS

TRIVIA

PERSONALITY