Benin B. Burns Diane

Benin burns diane, born into a place full of money, but for what? Only to be neglected by his parents, attending private school, with no friends or his own family to turn to, soon he rebelled against his parents, convincing them (somehow) to let his attend public school instead, though his father was harder to convince, being emotionally and verbally degrading towards him, since he was a child, his father would always be someone that he could never face or look directly into, because of this, he developed a habit of being able to cry without any sign of emotion, silent crying in his room every night, soon that habit evolved to something more drastic, tired of crying every night, he resorted to self harm, but immediately stopped because he couldn't go through the physical pain he was conflicting on himself, at this point, he resorted to stealing alcohol from his parents, they never noticed of course, his mother would only drink wine, his father stayed locked in his office all day, no one ever noticed, not until he met a small little blonde boy, he made his life mean something,,, he was something he looked forward everyday, he helped him make friends, and become,, someone better than he was,,, maybe that why he,, fell in love.

They spend their high years together, eventually Ben confessing his feelings and Stanley having mutual feelings for him, of course, for their own personal reasons, they kept their relationship a secret, every valentine's day, since they first met, they gave each other gifts with meaning, and Ben kept every single one of them, and so did Stanley, but as time passed, they became more opened at their relationship, which would be a fatal mistake, because Ben has enemies, because of the family he belonged to, it wasn't when it was particular day where they were holding hands and walking, and they were attacked, Ben could handle himself, but be ause he wasn't alone on this day, he was distracted by Stanley, the last thing he was his lover being cornered, which sent Ben into a rage, it wasn't until he was already too late, a deafening gunshot echoing, outnumbered by many, he could only watch, eventually punching and kicking his way to him, he held him in his arms as he desperately tried to stop the bleeding, soon using what strength he has left to carry him all the way to the emergency room, when they took him away, he objected, he didn't wanna let him go, but he had to, he suffered minor injuries, cuts and bruises that would definitely scar, a reminder of this day, and he'd never forget it how could he?,, it was just a week before valentine's day, their anniversary.

As a last desperate resort, he stole money from his parents purchasing some rings of mateonity, he and his lover had wanted to get married someday,, but, it seemed fate had other plans, he returned to the hospital the next day, his family, was there, and it was a stab to the heart, knowing that his family only saw both of them as friends and nothing more, it was after they'd left, he took advantage of his sedated state, where things seemed more real than they actually were, twisting the reality and making it seem like,, they were getting married.

It made Stanley so happy, but as he held his hand, both seemed to tell each other their vows, Stanley just couldn't keep himself awake any longer, his gunshot being fatal, he watched as he smiled at him and told him he would always love him,, Benin just held his hand and watched the life within his one and only lover, disappear, for the first time in years, he showed strong and sorrowful emotion, and he cried and cried, until his face hurt. He carried a heavy guilt and burden on his heart now, the awful lie he'd told his lover, that they were married, when in reality, they would only be, lovers and now bound to each other for life until death. 

Ben didn't know what else to do and frankly he didn't care anymore, but his mother had taken pity on him, despite not knowing Stanley or liking their relationship, she pitied him enough, to pay for the funeral expenses. After the funeral, he spiraled down, down into the first few nights of drinking and crying for his beloved, wasting any money he had left. Shortly after, his father found out, he was enraged to find out he'd disgraced the family name, he didn't care about his dysfunctional family or anyone, the friends that his only helped him make, he didn't care anymore, nothing made sense anymore, nothing held meaning. It wasn't until his parents decided, that he'd ruined the family name, and disowned him in the worst way they would to anyone, they cancelled off all connections they had with him, taking everything he'd ever owned, including his precious memories that he'd created, including what he had left of his beloved, in a matter of a few days, everything he worked for was gone, he had nothing left. and to make this break his very soul, he was left with nothing, none other than on their anniversary, he was alone, he truly had nothing left. He wandered the streets, thinking maybe he wasn't worthy of such a beautiful thing, love and happiness. he spent the next few months wandering the streets, developing a bad health habit, eating small things to avoid starvation, he found a small friend, a feline that was attacked by other awful cats, he named the small kitten, 'socks', he used what small money he had left to feed his small friend, doing this for the entire year left, but unfortunately couldn't keep his need to wallow and drink his pain away, breaking on the one year anniversary of Stanley's death, he made the bottle last, withering way and becoming skin and bones, exhausted, his nightmares of his dying beloved in his arms, his blood stained into his clothes and his head. 

He begged on the streets, barely getting by, he wouldn't last for very long he could feel it now, his body giving away with each passing day, he was waiting for his death, to see his beloved, and to finally be rid of his shame and guilt, but it wasn't until he'd met someone, he was forcing his body past its limits to dance, he'd been able to get money from street dancing, but because he lost his balance, he'd bumped into a rather tall man, a stoic expression, but Ben wasn't phased, he'd seen worse, he'd quickly gotten off, straining his legs to stand up again, he apologized for ruining his suit with his filth, hoping he wouldn't be too upset, it wasn't until the taller man stopped him in his apology and asked if he'd like to accept a meal from him, Ben hesitated, unsure of the man's true intentions, people who were picked off the streets, usually never came back, Haha maybe this was his lucky break,,, so he accepted, unknowingly making a decision that would change his life for the better again. Breaking the promise that he'd made on his lovers grave.

that he would never love anyone again.

because it tore him apart.