almos (more info)

chipiko

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- smiles very frequently. it’s rare to see her without some sort of smile on her face… atleast, he tries not to let others see her without one. it’s gentle, understanding and optimistic, free from negativity that may be brewing on the inside to outsiders

- however, this smile is nothing but a shell in order to please others out of fear and personal distrust of the world that she currently lives in. he entertains  whatever the other person wants, only making exceptions if it personally conflicts with her ideas and opinions at the moment. what will happen if nobody will like them anymore? would he lose purpose? would they abandon her too?

- whenever angry, which is more than possible for almos to become, their face takes on a more neutral expression if the anger is easy to mask. nobody would be able to tell unless her tone of voice made itself very clear. the stare he gives off is uncomfortable 

- small bursts of enragement are even worse. he completely drops his kind act in order to completely show the other person what he is truly feeling. and.. oh.. this emotion? it is not pretty in the slightest. it is dirty, monstrous and gnarly. and in worst cases — uncontrollable. it makes you question how can someone like almos have such a thing inside of them in the first place

- holds grudges. will not forgive easily, despite their friendly persona. the grudge is hidden behind a white lie

- trusts others minimally. it’s better to have some faith in the other person before they betray that trust of yours 

- they have a feminine, baby face, in contrast to their body. despite their body being hidden underneath clothes, it’s quite masculine with a mix of daintiness

- although they have long hair now, almos used to have slightly shorter hair before death. maybe it is about time to cut it again…

- his butterfly wings begin to crack during colder temperatures. in order to avoid the severity of such cracks, she wraps them up with warm fabric. the con is that she won’t be able to fly (thumbs up)

- a bird person. loves doves and swans the most

- insects interest almos quite a bit, barely showing any fear or disgust towards them

- occasionally takes the time to water flowers. he doesn’t absorb himself in gardening though, seeing it as a pity if the flowers would have died because of him

- flowers associated with him are spider lilies, bluebells and violets

- goes through infrequent periods of self harm. does his best to hide this itch to completely ruin parts of herself. sometimes these periods can mix with her hypersexuality, which leads to days of uncontrollable addiction. it’s complicated. she can’t take on these issues well on her own, accepting them as they are instead, in spite of how harmful it all is

- has a subconscious fear of pursuing romantic relationships due to her past. it requires trust and dedication, however everything can fall apart in an instant.. which is something he wouldn’t be able to handle. (this fear is still there, albeit deep deep down, even when almos and yue managed to get into a relationship in canon; yue also has a similar fear but for opposite reasons)

- dependable, yet… how long will it last? when will someone like almos get to rely on another person when she needs help or comfort? when can she finally break down her walls? answer: [     ]

- during his life before death, almos began dating others at around 15 as a way to receive attention he was never able to get from his parents due to neglect. most of early relationships didn’t last long because of how clingy almos was to the ones they would have dated, making them somewhat annoyed at how much she wanted for herself. however, everyone back then was inexperienced and didn’t realize how relationships truly worked yet. at around 16 to early 17 he tried experimenting a little with dating and decided to go for people who were his classmates at the time. he had made a big discovery about himself (finally getting the confidence from others to identify as a trans girl at the time after a while, before realizing later that he felt more comfortable being nonbinary; was misguided) and quite a alot of people began showing interest in him when he became a popular figure in her own class. they saw it as a great opportunity, but his intentions as to why he wanted to date became a bit more muddied, as it went from being something to do in order to receive attention, to a necessity as a means of escape from their horrible, depressing life full of nothing, as well as a method of self harm. they were almost obsessed with the idea of belonging to someone, since it meant that they could have been loved more than their parents would have ever loved her. but that decision of theirs was also almos’ biggest mistake. they were hurt, abused even. almos became even more dependant on her partners, holding onto them and begging them to stay with him, pleading that he would do anything, yet all they did was use her and then push him away.  …her relationships, just like before, remained short. except for one, that almos seems to remember. longest than all of them, lasting about a year and a half or so. however, it was also the one where she displayed hatred towards the one she thought she had loved. the one almos thought that finally saved her from everything she had to endure

- (related to the one above ^) almos used to date a guy almost 2 years older than her. or was it 3? maybe 4? she doesn’t remember herself, and wishes not to. it was a relationship that lasted longer than it usually would. yet the way it ended was… quite gruesome. he had done something to almos, and that ‘thing’ that he did was unforgivable. she never felt this toyed with her entire life, and it seems that it awakened an emotion inside of her. all of that humiliation, all of those snarky, disgusting words he said about her to his friends as a means of bragging, while she had to smile and laugh out of embarrassment, even if it made her want to choke up all of her tears that she had poured out not available to the public eye…. fucking pig. horrible human being that he was, despite everyone else being a pig, just like him. 

the man disappeared next night. and now that knife, stained with his blood, will remain as a core memory to almos, forever. she will never unsee the sight god gave her on that day: those eyes looking down upon her for acting out such terrifying violence.  they were scum.