Sarah Radish

Check out her Wiki page [here] for additional information!

General

Sarah Radish is a main character in Story Beats, serving as the femme fatale, or dangerous woman, of the cast. She made a brief appearance in Season 1, later officially joining the main cast during Season 3 where she became a huge presence over the course of the year. Clever and conniving, she is a rather formidable woman with a love of chocolate and hunky men that borders on the extreme.

Personality

Sarah is very cunning and intelligent, often the brains behind a lot of the schemes that unfold during the Seasons. She effectively stole the role of "dangerous woman" away from Amber, who stopped serving her dual-purpose role of sparkly diva and volatile hothead in the beginning of Season 3. Sarah doesn't stand for any form of sass or insulting and is fully prepared to counter all of it a thousand fold. Being as intelligent as she is, she also cannot stand idiocy and often berates the other characters for their foolish actions or decisions. While she always tries to be graceful and elegant to distance herself from the buffoonery in the house, this is proven to be just an act that drops rather quickly at the first inconvenience. She has been shown to be quite athletic with a surprising amount of agility and coordination- something that lends itself to her skills with handling various weaponry- but this is wildly inconsistent and she likely has a high chance of hurting herself depending on the stunt she's trying to pull. Not afraid of mischief, she is more than happy to break the law to ensure her plans succeed and has actually evaded arrest on more than one occasion. She is also extremely flirtatious, often trying to seduce other men (Kyle Prow and Johnny Depp being two recurring love interests) or present herself in ways not suitable for children. Nathan often comments on how she "threatens the age rating" of the novel with her succubus-like antics. In Season 3, she became such an overwhelming presence with her charm and tenacity that she quickly took over the entire year, hosting a variety of talk shows, creating her own marathon chapter, and even getting her own spinoff series that continued until the end of the novel. To summarize, Sarah is the kind of woman you'd want on your side and be very afraid to have as your enemy.

Physical Description

Sarah is a short woman of curvaceous, busty build with black, rectangular glasses and long brown hair. In the novel's official artwork, she wears a red t-shirt with green hems coupled with blue shorts and black shoes. Her redesign instead has her wearing jeans and a red hoodie that has devil horns on the hood. Her main color is red, and anything she owns typically is of the same color. She has been known to dress up in more extravagant outfits from time to time and sometimes even dons full disguises that come with their own unique names and personalities, such as Latisha McBride from Ringmasters or Quaznie Kokador from the chapter of the same name.

Strengths & Weaknesses

Strengths

• Is very intelligent and cunning, leading to all sorts of ingenious plots and ideas
• Her tenacity allows her to achieve things that other people could not
• Has a lot of confidence so she can't be brought down easily

Weaknesses

• Is rather short
• Is not a morning person
• Her lust for chocolate and men often clouds her vision
• Has a short temper and it takes very little to make her furious
• Her overconfidence can sometimes lead her to her demise
• Often looks down on the other characters because they're not a smart as she is
• Her "do whatever I want" attitude gets her into all sorts of trouble

List of crimes

Below are all of the crimes that Sarah has committed over the course of the novel. These include crimes, felonies, and things that are outlawed in the novel's universe.

• Assault - Has used brute force numerous times in order to get her way.
• Attempted murder - She's basically always trying to kill Zack, though thankfully it's within the confines of her own home so it rarely attracts the attention of the police.
• Carjacking - While a bit loose on the official definition, she once commandeered a car that Nathan was driving without his permission and sped around destroying things, then ran over Zack in front of a police officer.
• Destruction of private property - Has destroyed parts of the mall on more than one occasion, most notably when she tore vending machines and other things out of the ground to throw at Zack in The Sarah Show: World Premiere. Frou Frou Frillies was also destroyed after she visited it in Girls' Day Out, though that was more Amber's fault.
• Evading arrest - Has run from the police several times, most notably when The Sarah Show got canceled and when she accidentally set fire to the neighborhood in Ready Player Four.
• Fraud - She sometimes wears disguises to pretend to be other people. While this is fine in and of itself, the things she says she is qualified to do while wearing these outfits is in no way official or certified.
• Illegal music downloading - When Nathan mentions that the government will soon be cracking down on piracy in Dawn of the Prinzessin, Sarah exclaims that downloading music illegally is how she keeps herself alive.
• Illegal show broadcasting - Filmed The Sarah Show from a closet and was nearly arrested by a squadron of Little Bangs because the entire thing was being done illegally.
• Kidnapping - An undisclosed incident at the local Build-a-Bear saw her holding several children and their parents hostage.
• Manslaughter - Has killed Zack on numerous occasions. Went to prison once for it but claimed it was still worth it.
• Possession of firearms - She always seems to have some sort of bazooka or other explosive on her person at all times.

Weaponry

Sarah is no stranger to weapons of mass destruction. It has been shown that she has her own hidden weapons panel in her room that houses all of the various knives, guns, and other death weaponry she uses over the years. Below are a few of the main weapons she has been known to use.

• Iridium Glove: A deep purple glove that appears harmless at first glance but packs devastating slapping power. The strongest of all gloves used for violence, the Iridium Glove is capable of knocking people unconscious just by snapping it on. She was seen using this during Against My Will: Familiar Enemy to easily defeat the strongest Zack Hakton clone.
• Lipgloss of Death: A tube of lipgloss that is blood red in color. While seemingly just another woman thing, applying this lipgloss grants her increased killing power as well as triggering the Kiss of Death ability which will melt any flesh her lips come into contact with.
• Purse of Epic Decapitation: A simple black leather purse that can turn into something of a scythe when needed. Pressing a button will cause a large crescent blade to emerge from the base, allowing her to swing the purse around and cut anyone in a wide area. Spikes can also protrude from the strap which allows for a whip-like option as well.
• Shank: A piece of jagged metal that she picked up somewhere. Easily the most basic of her weapons, it can be used to stab or cut people that annoy her.
• Taser: A device capable of shocking enemies with a strong dose of electricity. This particular taser can increase its output for even stronger shocks.

Outfits

Sarah is often more elegant and refined than the other characters, choosing to dress up more appropriately for holidays and special events. While she's most often seen wearing a dress of some sort for fancy gatherings, she sometimes dresses up in full costumes in order to deceive those around her, often because she'd be arrested on sight otherwise. Unfortunately, anyone who actually knows her can see right through the façade.

• Brick Lady [Chaos at Christmas]: Sarah as the Brick Lady, otherwise known as someone who carries a seemingly endless supply of bricks to throw at people. She seems to be basing this character off of Penelope, Nathan's female companion during the Elite series of short stories who would often hit people with bricks to make them be quiet. Sarah proclaims herself to be the "Mistress of Masonry".
• Daphne Goldstine [Sarah's Time Has Come]: A spunky woman who is capable of organizing even the grandest events, be it small get-togethers or large-scale marathon chapters.
• Latisha McBride [Ringmasters]: A short, plump, sassy black woman who lives for the mall and enjoys watching her favorite men wrestle.
• Nisha Drivar [Driving in the Special Lane]: A small yet aggressive woman who serves as a strict driving instructor.
• Quaznie Kokador [Quaznie Kokador]: An alien from another planet who desires to destroy planet Earth. Stashes her UFO in Hakton Orchard.
• Tazer Lady [Attack of the Taser Lady]: Sarah as the Tazer Lady, an entity who appears at a moment's notice to tase those being loud and obnoxious. She apparently stole this role away from Cat without consent.
• Timerra Sterling [The Sarah Show: World Premiere]: A determined woman who dazzles all with her carpentry, sink repair, and quirky humor.