McGee (English Teacher AU)

›› If McGee were an English teacher

I randomly made an AU based off of a definition in this: https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=McGee; just for fun and speculation. It has little to do with the main McGee's background. Turns out when you try to take a personality and transplant it into a context it was never intended for it's actually really fun!

He'd be a shitty English teacher and dislike his job and be around the same age as he is in the main canon.

I'm still thinking of how he became one considering that in the main canon I figured he'd major in finance and he hates teenagers.

He teaches regular English class for freshmen (9th grade) and seniors (12th grade).

"I like teaching freshmen a lot better than the seniors. Seniors have so much senioritis going on. Some are so unprepared for their future of becoming an adult that they completely break down and bring stuffed animals and blankies to class."

He'd have the most inappropriate relationships with seniors though

First Impression ↵

He's the youngest looking out of all the teachers yet he's probably the bitchiest.

He's usually serious af in the classroom but in the halls he interacts with his colleagues like a normal person which often catches students off guard.

He's one of those teachers who wears a dress shirt and tie to school every day because he cares about looking professional. (Leaning toward long sleeves rolled up over short sleeves.)

It contrasts with him wearing a beanie all the time, and he's the most hat-wearing of all the teachers which is hilariously hypocritical when he enforces the no hats in the classroom policy. 

In this universe he'd be okay with how he'd look while wearing his glasses, though I'm not sure why. He probably seeks to look more mature and knowledgeable, instead of younger and more fun like in the main universe. He's at a disadvantage for looking credible since it's so hard to tell his age.

Disaster probably happens a lot from him looking professional and unprofessional at the same time, as well as looking like an easy teacher and a hard teacher at the same time while being one of the hardest teachers in the school.

Basically the only time students can see him smile is in his faculty photo in the school yearbook. Quite a dazzling smile, too.

When he walks through the halls he often just looks like another student (considering he's shorter than 90% of them) if it weren't for his outfit.

Unlike any other teachers people can see him with his earbuds on during lunch breaks because he doesn't care how it looks to others.

He also sticks out from the teachers for being not married, which both explains a lot and leaves a lot of things unexplained. He doesn't talk much about this part of his life.

First day would honestly go like

He'd have the alphabetically arranged seating chart on the board in front of the class already, the desks are arranged in normal rows, and his name would be written on the board. He'd sit silently at his desk doing his own thing until the bell rings.

Then he'd be just standing at the center of the front of the room and silently take attendance on his clipboard while scanning the room.

He'd briefly introduce himself by name but doesn't bother saying anything else, and he'd go straight into the syllabus and first assignment. This first day he doesn't talk about himself much, which is unusual for him, but he just wants to judge the kiddos he's got this year.

Most of the students would have this moment when they're looking at the short guy in the hat at the front of the room and think he's some college student or substitute teacher, until they realize that this guy is actually their teacher for the year. This creates either terror or excitement.

He has the authority that'd make everyone sit up straight when he walks to the front of the room.

With the way he projects his voice and his piercing eyes, he often commands attention as he speaks. He takes advantage of this by teaching with large gestures and making little use of external teaching tools. If someone is talking he would just stop and ominously stare at them until they realize and stop talking.

He'd often slap a meter stick on the desk really loudly for dramatic effect or to really get everyone's attention, which startles the shit out of the students if they weren't looking at him. The meter stick is taped in the middle because he broke it while doing that one year.

↳Attitude

He'd be visibly annoyed if people went up to him during work time to ask for help.

"So I was wondering—"

"Excuse me, could you at least greet me first? Students seem to be forgetting basic manners. Let's try this again, this time beginning with 'Hi, Mr. McGee.'"

Often at the end of the semester when everyone turns in their work late he talks about how stressful it is to grade so many things.

A lot of the time he'd be serious and in a perpetually bad mood, but in classes where everyone behaves and doesn't do anything stupid, the goofy side of him might show.

He has this really dry sense of humor where he'd sometimes say funny things but in a serious and bored tone of voice.

Other English teachers have the patience of an angel, but not Mr. McGee. When the stupid and annoying kid asks some inane question, he'd answer in the most condescending and sarcastic way, but still in the same tone like nothing unusual happened.

It's nice during the few times the class is able to loosen up and laugh around him because there are other times when he's totally scary: he's one of the few teachers at the school who yells at students. It could be from the front of the room at one particular student, or more rarely to the entire class. Sometimes he'd take one student outside of the classroom to lecture/yell at, which is awkward for the people inside the classroom who can hear him through the wall or the people out walking in the hallway.

He's one of those teachers who'd stick his head out of the door during class and yell at any students still in the hallways to go to class. It's funny to his own class but scares the students outside shitless.

He honestly has eyes on the back of his head. Maybe ears too. It's a known fact that teachers hear most gossip through the classroom walls while the students walk by them. He hears a scary amount of it, and from that he knows that students find him hot as fuck a terrible teacher to have, and that pisses him off.

There's occasions when a student would gift him art or write him a note praising his teaching abilities, which takes the perpetual frown off his face and puts him in a good mood for the rest of the day.

Teaching ↵

His attitude distracts from the fact that he's a pretty shitty teacher. He is a harsh grader and has a reputation for being one of the difficult English teachers, but he barely knows how to give (positive) feedback. It is extremely rare for him to give a perfect score. His actual lessons are okay but people are often scared to ask him questions and he never bothers to explain difficult vocabulary to the class. 

Some students say that he's terrible at teaching to a whole class, but he's great at teaching one-on-one. Some others say it's the other way around.

The extra scores and policies he adds for attendance and participation are pretty strict, showing his zero tolerance for lateness or coming unprepared. There's a possibility he'd allow people to go to their locker after the bell for the supplies they forgot, but his patience quickly drains.

A lot of the time during his downtime while the students work (actually he always has some grading to do since he assigns a ton of essays but he can handle it later) he's standing somewhere in the room reading a good book. You have to give him credit; it sets a good example for the class. He wouldn’t be here anyway if he didn’t enjoy reading.

He likes talking about how good he is at reacting to emergencies and how safe the class is in his hands. He'd repeat that one story every year about how he single-handedly saved an entire class during a gas pipe explosion emergency some years ago by quickly evacuating them to a safe spot. I could bet my ass that in a school shooter emergency he'd just run for his life.

Whenever there was an error/typo on a test that made it harder to decide the correct answer and a student came up to him to ask about it, he'd angrily tell them that the test was completely perfect and the student should be able to figure it out based on how tests work. He'd say the same thing to every student in following periods who asked him about the same error.

Whenever a student talks to him about an error in their grade, he'd hastily grumble about how the grading website glitched. He only fixes it half the time. He seems to make these mistakes frequently, but he'd never lose papers as he's pretty organized.

Teacher's pets are a real thing with him. There's a certain group of students whom he will never treat with disdain and he'll always have pleasant and friendly conversations with. These people typically ask him about their grades the least, if that could be a coincidence.

He'd introduce new assignments like

"This five page essay will be due by the time winter break starts. Don't worry, it shouldn't be that hard... IF you know what you're doing. I'm going to show you how, and you better pay attention because I'm not going to repeat this again a dozen times for everyone who comes up to me saying they missed what I had just told you."

He does tell a lot of useful non-English things to his students sometimes when the class has extra time. He has given tips on investing and paying taxes, told stories and advice about his past college life, and hinting that he basically peaked in high school unfortunately and now he gets to spend forever here.

Like seriously he's managed to find room for a few of his soccer trophies from high school to be kept in his classroom.

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