Personality

WC: 617

INTP · Enneagram 5w4 · chaotic good

intellectual · melancholy · skeptical · reserved · impulsive · perfectionistic

Eira accepted long ago that her path to destiny- or whatever mediocre future she might pave- would be forged on her intellect. She was always the private, shy kid who would rather hold a book than a conversation. She excelled in her schooling and spent her off-hours writing, reading, learning, and creating. She was always told she would change the world some day. 

And while on the surface she's rational and logic-driven, an untempered passionate ego broods beneath the surface. 

Eira prefers to live adhering to rationality and reason, but only as a response to the turbulent emotional state that lies within. It wasn't always like this- as a kid, she lived wholeheartedly and without inhibition. She was freely smart and expressive and passionate. Her perfectionism was initially born of a love for her interests and desire for excellence. But over time, it developed as a means to justify her existence. She feels her once-bright future has faded, and now she has something to prove. She's never satisfied with her work and is now mostly driven by a weird mix of natural curiosity and self-criticism.

Sometimes all this inner tension explodes out in unfortunate ways. She has a mean impulsive streak. She's a sucker for gambling, drinking, and other habits that satisfy a hunger for instant gratification. She's lost money, clothing, possessions, and dignity this way. Her natural spontaneity and chaotic decision-making lend themselves to unwise purchases, dangerous situations, and questionable interactions. 

She takes it all in stride. Such is how she survives.

She lacks the tolerance for boring tasks and grunt work. She wants to dig into the meat of problem-solving, inventing, and innovating. She's easily bored. She loves puzzles, logic games, riddles, and games that require quick wit. She loves honing her magic and learning new techniques and rituals. Feeling untethered by "rules" and dismissive of the consequences, Eira's prone to spending all-nighters experimenting with scrying or reading books on ancient Ivratian politics.

But all in the comfort of her own solitude, of course. Eira is reserved to a fault. She hides her strong inclinations, or just smothers them with new interests. She doesn't let anyone in. Socially, she's cautious and skeptical of others who appear too kind. She has few friends- and is terrible at keeping up with them. She's not good at emotional support or reliance. She prefers the company of her pets to almost anyone else.

She's cold and distant- until she's not.

Instead, she harbors a broken attachment style where she falls deeply, obsessively in love with anyone who can break down her walls. This has happened once before- and to no one's surprise- ended badly. A flame that burned fast and strong, but flickered out almost as quickly.

Eira has a complex relationship with her past and this aspect of her personality. She hates the loss of agency that comes with codependency. She knows if she has a path to corruption, it's saddled on the back of her obsessive traits. But at the same time, feeling validated and loved is her addiction. She pines for the days when they were together and happy. She wants someone to give her life meaning. If someone else can see all of her and love her anyway, then surely that means she's actually worthy of it, right?

Far from the bright-minded child she once was, these days Eira has a melancholic air about her. It's the result of living beneath her own expectations for her life, as well as a prolonged mourning for a relationship that went awry. She's profoundly sad and lonely at the core, but probably doesn't realize it. Why poke that sleeping bear when she can fill her days with more honorable distractions?

History

(aka the most boring character history ever)
WC: 935

Childhood

Eira was born in a quiet, humble sea town facing the Rithan Ocean. 

She was her non-mage parents' second child. Her father worked in trade imports, after a long career that began as a teenage shiphand. Her mother was a homemaker and spent the days home with the children. Part-time, the family bred and raised hound dogs for hunting/companionship. They weren't a rich family by any means- sometimes the wind blew too cold through the cracks in the house, and sometimes meals were a little scant in the winter. But Eira doesn't remember those parts. She remembers early childhood primarily as a warm hearth, salty sea air, wool blankets, the sound of dogs frolicking through the house, and her father's deep hearty laugh.

Her elder sister Lune expressed a magic ability from an early age (turns out sparking electricity from her hooves wasn't something everyone could do) and their parents, excited and admittedly nervous, immediately sent her off to Namarast to be trained by the Order. They were naive but open-minded to the arcane, with little exposure to the world outside the coast of the Rithan. Eira was only 4 when her sister was sent to the city.

Her revelation as a mage came during a simple dinner conversation a year later. Through a mouthful of oatmeal, she excitedly exclaimed Lune was in the pond in the backyard.

After nervous prodding (and a hurried check on the pond), her parents realized Eira could see flickers of her sister's image in water. They asked her to show them, to which Eira could not- she couldn't control how or what she saw, just that there were moving pictures in the water sometimes. 

Agents of the Order confirmed Eira's mage abilities. Her parents, now with both children harboring magical powers, decided with Eira's development they would move to Namarast to be closer to their children. Eira was 5.

Adolescence

Her ability was called scrying, and she was paired with an Order mentor who taught her the intricacies of the discipline. It was a complicated magic- one that required both the brain and heart, and a cessation of all biases. She was assured the Order could value her ability for record-keeping, court proceedings, or even covert spying. All she had to do was devote herself to learning.

Which she did. She threw herself into her studies, forgoing sleep and food to further her accomplishments. She apprenticed with her mentor, absorbing everything like a sponge. She loved it. 

Lune finished her studies with top honors when Eira was 15. She was a shining star for the Order, a novel student who apprenticed brilliantly in electrokinesis. She was immediately hired by an Ivratian council to innovate new technologies for Namarast. 

Eira was happy for her sister's success, but felt delegated to her shadow. She kept her head down, working to shake off the lingering doubts about her own fortune. She kept few friends, preferring to not be bogged down by social obligations. 

Adulthood

Eira finished her coursework for the Order with excellent marks, but still felt she wasn't good enough to employ her abilities professionally. She took a job clerking for an estate manager in Namarast. She was overqualified, but it was a "safe" job and didn't ask for difficult tasks that would prove her incompetent.

Then Sian.

Sian was the granddaughter of one of Eira's elderly clients. They met during an appointment upon Sian's grandfather's sudden death. The mare was curious, breathtakingly smart, bright and optimistic. Her smile could light up the ocean.

Eira was enamored from the first encounter.

Sian was a mage as well, a shapeshifter trained by the Order. She worked in the Ivratian Navy as a message carrier. Their relationship persevered past Sian's status as a client, and from acquaintances they blossomed into friends and then something more.

Eira, for the first time in her life, drank deep from the well of romance. She had no idea life could exist in so many colors and spectrums. She had no idea someone else's laugh could make her feel so tingly and joyous inside. 

She had no idea someone could want her like this. 

They interlocked their lives, spending almost every day together. Eira locked herself from the world but poured herself into Sian. She and her beloved- they needed no one else. Months of bliss passed. Eira changed. She was happy.

- - -

Then, just as quickly as Sian entered, she was gone.

Sian had suspected for awhile the dark underpinnings of Eira's infatuation- that it was tainted into something more cruel and possessive. She loved Eira deeply, but Eira loved her too much in return. Her desires were something Sian, a mortal mare, could not provide. 

Eira wanted to love a god. Sian's chest fluttered with a heartbeat of flawed mortality.

Fearing the tangle of a web drawn too deep, and the ramifications of someone too obsessive, Sian left quietly one morning with a note on the bed. She confessed her love for the hundredth time. But also confessed it was too much. Too close. She asked Eira not to find her.

- - -

Eira changed.

Shattered, she closed up. No one else would inflict this pain or be the recipient of her tendencies. 

Now

Nine years since that day. Eira spends long hours working and long nights reading, writing, researching, gambling, or drinking (or all of the above.) She refuses to make friends or look for a relationship. She's cordial and polite, but completely disinterested in going further.

Despite excelling in her magic, she still hesitates to use it in her career. She still works as a clerk. It's boring, but it's predictable enough that it feels reliable.

She assists her mentor from school with his own research a few days a week, and receives additional training in return. Pursuing her work was the only constant in her life, and she intends to push her abilities as far as she can.

Notes

- She scrys her own memories of Sian most nights to help her fall asleep

- She's a regular patron of Beggar & Flagon. Vivi has collected many a coin & garment from Eira's possession when she loses gambling matches (which is often)

- She still feels lost in her sister's shadow. Lune is successful and appears to have her life together. She's the obvious "golden child" of the family, while Eira feels like she's failed somehow. 

- She has a dog and two cats. She prefers them over actual people.

- She has recurring nightmares of the subjects in her scries turning to look at her

S C R Y I N G

an eye into the past & present