Aftermather's Bulletins
Figured I would explain my recent woes because people seemed to notice I'm not doing good ( ･ั﹏･ั)
It's been college finals time which has messed up my schedule so much that I haven't eaten anything in like a week because my autism says "this is different and you aren't safe no food for you" and that conveniently coincided with my antidepressants running out and I didn't sleep at all last night because I was working on a project until genuinely twenty minutes before the exam at 8am. but biggest and most devastating and important is that I have to move back in with my extremely abusive parents today and they have already been yelling at me and belittling me and I'm not even there yet.
That's what's going on at this very second but also I'm frustrated because I don't feel loved or supported by any of my friends. And I'm always getting left behind and left out and forgotten about. And asking for help has either gotten me nothing or 'sorry.' And I've been made to feel selfish for asking for help and wishing someone would help me. And all of this is a huge massive deal my entire life is this it's not just something I can forget about or that 'sorry man' can fix. Like. My parents. are abusive. and I have to live with them now for a while until I can move into school summer housing in a month. Also the commissions I took for my very expensive doctor bill were not enough and I'm kind of dying every day because of it. I'm sorry I will get those done so fast now that it's summer and I can finally maybe breathe when my parents aren't calling me worthless and disgusting which is genuinely a thing they do. Lots and lots of severe chronic pain flare ups because of the stress and not enough sleep or nutrients. I blacked out today during the final even. but no one cares and I've just come to accept that :/ I've been mentally doing so well until like two weeks ago. Now I'm back to being evil and bad and worthless 😔
It just feels like no one cares :(( I keep going many days without meals even before this because no matter how often I ask for help and tell my friends and family I'm disabled and can't drive and get myself food or water, they do nothing and don't even seem like they're listening. When I tell people I either get "oof" or "same" or "what the fuck do you want me to do about it??" My friends won't help because they feel too guilty about having food themselves to help me who has no food ??? Like cool sorry you feel bad for eating while others go hungry but what about me ? the one who has no food to eat ?
God I'm such a good artist. I should be expensive as hell because I know what I'm doing. Anyone who says "I can't draw this / it's not my art style" you're a fucking amateur and a coward. I don't have a style. I just make art. I learn and grow and adapt because I'm a good artist.
A lot of the people you Think are good artists are not. They draw only pale animes all with the same face and skinny body type and use color and lighting to make it look impressive on first glance to someone who isn't well versed in art. They ooooshiny you like an infant. They pay no attention to the decisions they make and why. They don't care to make their art cohesive and make sense visually. For a good artist very single line has to matter. Every stroke has to have a reason to be there or it is not worth keeping.
Of course art is a hobby and it's fun and nothing matters and there are no rules!! Make what you want to make however you want to make it. But I'm tired of seeing "I can't draw fat people they don't fit my style" or "I don't know how to draw black people so I won't draw them" from people who make hundreds of dollars per commission. You are actually disgusting. You are not a real artist. If you aren't willing to learn why are you making art at all. Trash.
The first 10 slots out of 100 are raffle slots!! Go go go share or commission them!!
https://toyhou.se/26830406.iron-artist-challenge-raffle
I like actually might be homeless soon school is ending and I'm not moving back in with my abusive parents. Would love to do donations but they never get any traction or sharing even when I bribe people with free art for just like making a bulletin while everyone gladly makes bulletins for raffles for so much less :((
Update NOBODY CARES. NOBODY CARES. All I get is "bruh" and "oof" when I tear my heart open and admit I might be homeless soon and need help. Nobody cares and there is no hope for me. I deserve to die in the street anyway
Hello umm!! I was trying to give Toonz a birthday gift but it says their account is closed?? Anyone know anything?
I think my parents are stalking me genuinely I caught them on the app they use to track me driving on the road that leads to and passes by my college dorm and not like on the fucking highway. They've suddenly stopped insulting me as much as of yesterday and are offering to buy me groceries and they insisted they walk me to my dorm door yesterday after we went out together for an hour and they loudly called themselves mommy and daddy and called me babygirl in front of the paper thin dormitory walls and insisted they carry my takeout box into my dorm because I apparently couldn't. I think they have noticed that I have been trying to cut contact and not visiting or calling them ever and I think they want someone to manipulate so they need me to depend on them for survival again. They said it's okay that I don't have a job they have never said that before it's always that I'm lazy and not really disabled and hate them for not getting a job. I think they want me to move back in so they can have someone to hurt again
Hey party people. I've drafted this post so many times, but it's very hard to put into words. My chronic pain is unbearable and I am barely scraping by as a full time student and I hardly draw for myself, let alone get art assignments or paid commissions done. I promise I will always finish commissions, but I don't want to force myself to do sloppy work for my clients.
But if you are in the current commission queue and want to cancel, please let me know. No hard feelings from my, I'm really sorry that I did not deliver in a reasonable timeframe!
I wish my adopts ever sold. No one is seeing them, I don't understand.
My disability is rapidly deteriorating my body bro!!!
i can literally say nothing else there are no words in the English language for the amount of pain I'm in that don't sound like a joke.
I'm like actually starting to hate "closed species" I don't know what that means or what it is or entails but every time I see a cool design it's a closed species. just make a character. I don't really understand at all.