Too be honest its been nothing but stress and a toll on my health. Its brought me much joy sharing my stories and characters with people. But there's just this darker side to it all that makes me want to put it in a box and keep it to myself. I suffer from severe paranoia on top of other conditions. So its hard for me to trust anyone. Every little favorite and comment just scares me and i don't think i can handle the fear anymore. I don't really have anyone to to talk to about this anymore. I'm not going to get rid of the characters i have. I'm just feel like being more reserved about them. No one needs to know what i own, ever since i joined the adopt community its always been you own that or who owns this. It like it turned it this collecting game and hated it. Tbh what makes me fall out of love with characters quicker is one not being able to write for it and two knowing people want it from me. It just shoots my paranoia through the roof.

I've been abused and battered by th adopt comunity since i joined. People spreading rumors, talking behind my back, judging me for buying things, and constantly asking for things I have. People aren't hospitable, you can be as nice as ever to them you can give them as much as you can, but if its not in thier favor they turn on you. Its a pretty horrid way to think about things. If you can't have it, make the person feel horrible till they just give it up.

And I can't really stand it anymore.

These past 2 months have been hell for me personally. Between my uncle dying and learning about the money he stole from our family for the very drugs he over doused on, to me going to court to fight the two people who sexually assaulted me. On top of my declining health i'm not having a happy time.

So for now everything will be hidden till i decide whether or not i want to keep using toyhouse cause tbh this community is stressful as all hell.

I've got most everything organized and planed out just...have... to type... a lot of stuff out.