Snowfall

Snow.

The folf ashuri supposed it was that time of the year again. His ear twitched as snow landed on it. Cold and wet…he rubbed it clean before putting his hands into his pockets. A quick glance back to the building he lived in. Scary…he looked away back to the streets. A few years ago he would be doing this morning walk all on his own. Snow, rain, tornado- whatever he always did his morning walk. It was part of his routine. The yellow coated ashuri slowly ducked down closer to the white fluff below him. When he was younger he faintly recalled making little snowmen with his little sibling. He smiled. Kiku was so cute back then. Akira remembered braiding his hair and bundling him up. Akira also remembered finding Kiku after he first chopped it all off. The pleads of don’t tell mom. As if he could…Akira sighed rubbing his head. Damn…what shitty memories. 

“Sorry, Akira! I couldn’t find my jacket-” Akira stumbled forward as someone hugged him from behind. Warm…and smelt like vanilla. Cinnamon…mmm. Akira was hungry. He squirmed slightly in the other’s arms to turn around.

“I told you it was in the dryer…”

“H-hey I just moved in with you I'm still learning where everything is,” Sean whined ears falling flat. Akira smiled reaching up and squishing the other’s cheeks. Smile…Sean had the nicest smile. He let go and linked his arm in one of Sean’s.

“I’ll give you a little tour tonight. I pretty much have the whole floor to myself, other than Kiku's storage rooms.” Akira sometimes wondered what was in those locked rooms. He figured it was better he didn’t ask and didn’t think too hard on it. He gently laid his head against Sean’s shoulder as they walked the mostly empty streets. A few people were here and there setting up their storefronts for the upcoming week of Forgiving. Forgiving…Akira wasn’t too religious. He never was. He believed in Tetru. But he didn’t believe that Tetru actually cared about them. If he did then why would he let slayers do what they did? Murder…so much blood stained his hands. Sean moved his arm to wrap around Akira's shoulder holding him slightly closer than before. 

“You ok?”

Akira blinked at Sean’s question. Was he that readable? He supposed they had been together for a while now and Sean seemed to be able to read body language better than almost anyone else he knew. Or at least…he could read Akira’s body language. Akira found himself nodding, unsure of how to explain his problem. He did this quite often with small things that bothered him. Sean frowned but rubbed the smaller’s shoulder knowing it would be better not to pry. A small peck to Akira’s ear was enough to calm him down for now. Sean was good at comforting like that. Akira sighed and looked ahead at the coffee shop they tended to frequent now. Forgiving decorations were stuck to the window and hanging near the door, along with the humans turkey thing. But Akira was more interested in the hanging paper lanterns. He didn’t say anything but Sean saw him staring intently at them.

“When I was little we didn’t have enough money to buy these,” Sean said looking over the lantern. “But I remember making them out of newspaper and hanging those up instead.”

“Newspaper? We made ours out of long grass strands…Kiku and I that is. Sometimes it would be hard to even make one but I did my best for him…” Akira frowned at the coloured paper. Now he could afford that if he wanted to…

Sean’s arms wrapped around his waist, head coming to rest on Akira’s, “how about we make some together then? With the fancy coloured paper. We can even buy the nice lighted ones and send those off!” 

Ah. Sean was young…Forgiving was something he still celebrated. Akira flexed his fingers but nodded. A slayer like himself…He then stepped out of Sean’s arms opening the door in front of him. “I think that would be fun.” Akira smiled as he stepped into the cafe. Sean’s tail wagged back and forth as he trotted after his partner. He would make this Akira's best Forgiving ever.

~~~~

Akira rolled over in bed. The sun wasn’t even up yet but he could hear something in the other room. “S-Sean?” He whispered, putting his hand to where his partner should be beside him. But no one was there. Akira rubbed his eyes and slowly stood up peaking out into the hall. His heart was racing despite being in his own house. As he carefully made his way towards the noise he noticed the kitchen light was on. He sighed in relief as he saw Sean was in there cooking something…cooking. Sean can’t cook. “H-hey what are you doing?” Akira whispered, sleep lacing his voice. Sean looked up from the task in front of him. Akira was standing in the hallway entry, covered in a fluffy white blanket. Tetru he’s so cute. Sean sat down whatever he was working on to attend to the other. 

“Preparing for today, you can go back to bed-” Sean started but was quickly cut off.

“Back to bed and you manage to burn the whole apartment building down? No thanks. Here let me help.” Akira yawned, dropping the blanket and walking into the kitchen to see what was going on. Sean was about to decline but got distracted as the blanket dropped. Akira was wearing one of Sean’s larger white T-shirts which caused a flip in Sean's chest. 

“Pumpkin Pie?”

Akira’s little voice brought him back. 

“Yeah! It’s an American thing. I think you'll like it!” Sean seemed so happy. Way too happy. Akira simply smiled and stepped back.

“Alright. Continue on then, I'll just supervise. You got up so early to do this.” Akira yawned looking over at the time. Barely even Five am. Maybe he did need to go back to sleep. Akira walked around to the other side of the counter, slowly sitting down at the barstools. He contently watched Sean cook for about thirty minutes before drifting off, far too tired to stay awake for this. 

Akira woke up to the smell of hot cocoa. He slowly sat up, a blanket falling off his shoulders. Akira woke up a little more as a cup was placed in front of him. Akira was never a coffee drinker. He was honestly surprised that Sean remembered these seemingly random things about him. He whispered a thank you as he took the mug in front of him. It was one of those silly mugs that said ‘#1 brother’. Over the years Kiku had made and gifted so many of these things. Akira sighed. Honestly he hated these cups. He wasn’t the #1 anything. He was just Akira. And in the end, he wasn't even Akira. That was just a name he stole for himself. He took a slow sip of the drink. B-burnt… Akira’s smile never left as he put the drink back down. Doing this for Sean, he reminded himself. That was Sean’s problem. He couldn’t cook…like…at all. Or when he did it seemed something would always be raw or burnt. Well…at least the taste was waking him up. Not to mention that Sean did this unprompted. Akira flushed taking another sip of the drink. He didn't even mind the taste anymore. 

“Happy Forgiving, Akira!” Sean chirped, tail wagging back and forth. Akira couldn’t be upset at that. Sean was such a little puppy. “Sorry for waking you up so early-”

“Mmm shh it’s fine Sean. I don’t mind waking up early if it’s to spend more time with you. Even if I fell asleep during said time Ahah…” Akira nervously sipped on the drink managing to maintain his poker face. It smelt surprisingly good in his house. Somehow Sean had figured out how to use the crockpot. Amazing. At least the food has to be cooked then…hopefully. Sean followed Akira’s eyes to the crockpot and nervously rubbed the side of his neck.

“It’s a casserole recipe my mom sent me. She said and I quote ‘this is near impossible for you to mess up’….it’s vegetarian.” 

Akira snickered sipping his drink again, “so your mom even knows huh…” He sat his drink down and stretched, “it’s nice to not have to cook for once! You’re going to make me feel like-like I owe you something” a light stutter hinted his voice but he managed to get through his sentence adding a slight wink at the end. “I’m gonna go get dressed! You wanna go walk through the Forgiving market with me? Maybe visit one of the local shrines…or...whatever you do on this holiday hah" 

Sean was still processing the first thing Akira said. But he smiled and nodded happy to do anything Akira was willing to participate in. They had known each other for a few years now and dated for at least one. Akira was never one to celebrate Forgiving and when he did he typically went on his own. In fact, the only event Sean had managed to drag Akira to was a Pride event. Sean pushed that aside, quickly checking over the crockpot that was cooking before trotting off to check on Akira.

“Is it still cold outside?” Akira asked as Sean walked in. Akira was half dressed, still in the process of picking out the right shirt. Sean could still remember all the times Akira refused to take off his shirt in front of the other. To hide his curse mark…Sean couldn’t imagine how much stress Akira went through to ensure his curse mark was always hidden. Sean thought it was beautiful…if one found it in them to ignore how it came to be. Akira was changed now. Forgiving was a perfect holiday to celebrate that. Sean wrapped his arms around the other, placing his head on top of Akira's. Akira smelt like blueberries. Sean loved that scent. 

“It is, but more like T-shirt and jacket weather,” Sean said pulling out a shirt for his partner then pulling out his own jacket. Sean waited till Akira put the shirt on before offering the jacket to him. “Your jacket is still washing so you can take mine-”

Akira hummed remembering that he forgot to move the clothes to the dryer. That’s on him getting distracted the night before. Which wouldn't have happened if a certain someone wasn't staying over. Akira half laughed at himself holding the jacket in his hands. Embarrassing.… he slipped on Sean’s jacket, the sleeves were too long but it was nice and warm. It hadn't been washed in a day and still retained the scent of Sean's cologne. Internally Akira was squealing. He loved this jacket so much. Having any part of Sean close to him was a plus in his book. Akira smiled and looked up to Sean for approval. Sean pulled Akira into a quick right hug mumbling something about how cute he was. Akira laughed gently patting Sean’s back. “Hey- love…we should get going before all the good snacks are bought up.” 

“Yeah of course! I’ll meet you downstairs!” A quick kiss to his partner’s forehead before Sean ushered Akira out. Akira grabbed his keys as he walked out of the apartment. He stepped into the elevator hovering the ground floor before changing his mind and deciding to visit his brother first. Upon arriving at the penthouse he took a deep breath before walking in. Surprisingly it was somewhat clean. Actually, really clean compared to normal. A nice forgiving shrine was set up near the window, pictures of their family…of Kiku's children…Akira looked over them with a frown. His fault. This was his fault. Tears threatened his eyes but he took a deep breath and whispered his respects. With Tetru’s blessings may they live on in the underworld. One day maybe they will return. He was deep in thought he didn’t even notice the pink-haired fox entering the room.

“Akira? It’s nice to see you out and about.” 

Akira turned to see Chiharu standing in the doorway. Judging by her messy hair and her wearing Kiku’s clothes he could figure out why she was here pretty easily. “Yeah…I’m about to go down to the market with my boyfriend.”

“Ooo? Kiku didn’t mention you were dating again.”

“Mm…yeah…” Akira found it hard to talk to guardians. Especially Chiharu. He worried someone like her could figure out what he did. She was more than smart enough for that, “Sorry I have to go down and meet him now. I only came up here to tell my brother something.”

“Mmhm,” Chiharu hummed walking up to Akira’s side. “They would have their own families by now,” Chiharu whispered before saying the quiet prayer to Tetru that everyone seemed to know. As if Tetru actually cared…or even heard them. She sighed stepping back and glancing down the hall, “Kiku is still in the shower. I can-”

“N-No it’s fine! I really need-d to go-” Akira stuttered backing away from Chiharu towards the door that led to his escape, “Maybe I’ll see you later-” 

Chiharu watched him leave in silence. She sighed crossing her arms, “…Maybe…maybe…”

Akira took a deep breath as he stepped out of the building. Crisp winter air filled his senses. Perfect. Life is perfect. Up ahead Sean was patiently waiting for him. Akira smiled watching as Sean’s tail wagged as he approached. “Hi sorry- I wanted to go t-talk to my br-br- uh-” Akira took a deep breath, “You know.” He said with a hand movement as if that completed his sentence. However, Sean nodded completely understanding. 

“Everything ok with you two?”

“Oh yeah, we’re fine! His girlfriend was up there and you know she's like…scary.” Akira rubbed the back of his neck, “like she’s older than me scary. Authority is scary aha.”

Sean rubbed Akira’s head with a soft laugh, “I get it, don’t worry I doubt those two will even make it out of their room today.”

“Isn’t that the truth.” Akira laughed leaning against Sean as they walked across the street to the park. The Forgiving Day marketplace had been fully set up and was already quite crowded. Sean’s arm wrapped around Akira’s waist as they walked through. Vendors were selling colourful candies and treats, special snacks and charms. Akira missed walking through these things. There were even cute games set up for the kids. How cute. They approached one of the shrines first. There were quite a lot of people lighting incense and laying gifts for Tetru and loved ones. Akira stepped slightly closer to Sean. Sean purchased two incense one for each of them. Akira watched as Sean lit his first, saying the typical prayer they forced each and every ashuri to learn as a kid before laying it in the shrine. Akira looked over the incense before doing the same and stepping away. He supposed he was somewhat thankful to Tetru for this second chance at life. He stood in silence tears finally starting to catch up. But how could he be thankful if he was cursed to be a killer? There was blood on his hand. His family's blood on his hands. He couldn't even trust himself around Sean. 

Akira didn't even notice Sean returning to his side. Sean wrapped his arms around the other reassuring that it was ok as they moved away. Sean's voice was dulled out as Akira leaned into his side. How was Sean so okay with this? Dating a killer? Knowing full well how much of a monster Akira was. Akira slowly looked up to the other. Sean held his reassuring smile and air of confidence. Always happy. That's what Akira liked about him. He smiled, internally sighing as he started to calm down. It's fine...it's fine...this holiday is about forgiving after all. Forgiving the past and being thankful for what Tetru has granted them. Akira held tightly onto Sean's hand getting a reassuring squeeze in return. It was ok...it was ok...

Away from the crowds, Akira and Sean sat quietly under a tree. Sean was watching as Akira folded a lantern with the pretty coloured paper they bought the day before. Sean was trying to copy him but messed up on one of the steps. Akira smiled as he finished and held it out to the other. “There. For you! Thanks for…taking me away.” Akira laughed nervously as Sean took the lantern from him. Sean smiled and sat the origami lantern beside him before slowly handing over his messy try at one. Akira was beaming. He could care less if it wasn’t perfect. It was the best thing he had received in a while. 

“You’re welcome, Akira. I know this stuff is hard on you. I want to ensure you feel as safe as possible.” Sean said with a bright smile as he looped a string through the lantern and stood up to hang it on the branches of the tree. Akira did the same, hanging his up as close to Sean’s as possible. 

“I do feel safe. With you.” Akira smiled leaning back against Sean to look at their handiwork. “I love you.” 

Sean’s hands rested on top of Akira’s. He smiled putting his head on the other's shoulders, “I love you too, Akira...Ah! Look Akira!”

Akira was turned around to watch as lighted lanterns started to be released by the crowd. He mouthed a quiet wow, holding Sean's jacket tighter around him. It was so pretty. He hadn't seen it up close in such a long time. A small tap on his shoulder had him glance back to Sean again. "You bought one?" Akira was beaming, a little too excited to participate in these activities again. He put his hands on Sean's ears flicking back and forth. For once his tail was wagging and not because Sean said something to get him to laugh. He was...genuinely happy to be included in this. A holiday he always believed he wasn't allowed to celebrate anymore. 

"Happy Forgiving, Akira."

Akira looked up, free hand pushing his hair out of his eyes, "Happy Forgiving, Sean"

The pair stood in silence as the lantern was released. Akira slowly stepping forward to lean against the other, dual toned eyes never leaving the lantern they released. "hey Sean...tradition says...that you write something in your lantern. Something you are thankful for. Or whatever...Kiku always put a silly wish in his. What did you put?" 

Sean hummed tapping the tip of Akira's ear, "I can't tell you! Or else it won't come true." Akira laughed at his partner's silly belief. 

"Well...It better be a good wish."