Nightmares

Adrian couldn’t sleep.

He’d been tossing and turning all night, but no matter how hard he tried fitful rest had continued to allude him.

He  wasn’t too surprised at this.  He was still adjusting to…well,  everything: having a roof over his head, having a family who actually cared about him. 

Having a stable life.

“Yeah, right,” Adrian chuckled ruefully to himself.  “When has my life ever been stable?”

The  Melanistic Sulcata Tortoise stared blankly at the ceiling, rubbing his  red, clawed fingers against the emerald pendant around his neck.

Even though he had everything he had ever wished for, he knew it wouldn’t last long.

Sooner or later, it will all fade away…just like him.

He  flipped over to face the dresser near his bed, squinting at the alarm  clock.  2 o’clock in the morning.  He groaned in frustration, turning  the clock away and rubbing his eyes.

“Whelp, no point of just  lying here if I can’t get any sleep,” the 16 year old turtle grumbled,  throwing off his bed covers, grabbing his yellow scarf from the dresser  and tip toeing out his room.

The sewer lair was dark and  quiet, all the other occupants still fast asleep.  Adrian spared a  glance at the room a few doors down from his.  Donnie’s bedroom.

He  half considered knocking on Donnie’s door, but decided agaisnt it.   Donnie and his brothers had already done so much for Adrian already by  taking him in, he didn’t want to burden them any further.

Besides, what would Adrian even say to Donnie?  

Hey,  what’s up, I can’t sleep, I’m having another existential crisis about  how I’m going to die soon because of what my parents did to me, and I’m  scared of getting too attached to your family?  

Right, as if.

His  fingers grasped his pendant tightly like a lifeline, anxiety twisting  his stomach into knots. This was still all so much.  Maybe…maybe he  shouldn’t be here…

He took a step towards the lair’s exit, but paused when he heard a soft whimper.

“What  the-?”  Adrian whirled his head at the source of the noise, which had  come from the large couch in the living area near the cluster of tv  sets.  He waited for a second, then heard the whimper again, accompanied  by a sniffle.  

Curious, Adrian peered over the couch and saw  a raggedy bundle of blankets curled agaisnt the armrest, and a small,  hunched figure wrapped within.  Even in the darkness, he recognized the  brown shell and orange, star-shaped patterns peeking out from under the  sheets.

“Tove?”

The little mutant in question gasped in surprise, poking their round head out from underneath their covers.  

“A-Adri?”

Tove,  a Radiated Tortoise and the adopted sibling of the Hamato family,  looked nervously at Adrian, quickly wiping their red and puffy eyes.  It  was obvious they didn’t want anyone to see they were crying.  

Adrian  shifted his feet awkwardly, regretting getting out of bed.  He wasn’t  good at dealing with kids, and he especially wasn’t good at dealing with  emotions.  Putting both things together usually resulted in disaster.  

Not  to mention that Adrian and Tove hadn’t really interacted much, Adrian  often going out of his way to avoid the inquisitive and very chatty  younger tortoise every chance he got.

It wasn’t that Adrian necessarily disliked Tove, he just…preferred spending his time alone, where he had peace and quiet.

Still, it was odd seeing the usually cheerful youngster act so frightened…

“I-I’m sorry if I woke you up, Adri,” the 10 year old mutant mumbled shyly.

Adrian  waved a hand nonchalantly.  “Nah, it’s cool, you didn’t wake me. I  couldn’t sleep so I was just…”  He cut himself off, rubbing his neck  guiltily.  

Tove cocked their head.  “Just what?”

Ah,  there was that inquisitiveness. “N-Never mind, it’s not important.   What are you doing up so late?  Isn’t it, like, past your bedtime or  something?”

Adrian cringed at the suspicious tone in his own voice.  Oh god, I sound just like Leo…

Tove  bit their lip, fidgeting with the teal scarf tied around their neck as  their eyes started tearing up again.  “I, um…had a nightmare.”

“Oh,”  Adrian replied, his face paling.  Crap, he really didn’t want to deal with this.  Why hadn’t he woken up Donnie, or  Splinter?  Anyone else would be better equipped to handle this than him.

“Do you, uh…need me to wake up Splinter, o-or your brothers?” he offered, slowly backing away.  “I could go get them and-”

Tove’s eyes widened fearfully. “No!” Tove exclaimed, grabbing Adrian tightly by the wrist.  “D-Don’t tell them, please!”

“O-Okay, okay, I won’t, just let me go!” 

Tove released their grip, Adrian wincing as he rubbed his wrist.  He’d forgotten how much stronger the kid was compared to him.

“I’m sorry,”  Tove whimpered, dropping their gaze in embarrassment.  “I didn’t mean to grab you so hard.”

“It’s…fine,” Adrian murmured.  “But, what’s the big deal?  No one’s gonna get mad at you for having a nightmare.”

Tove slumped back down on the couch, draping one of their blankets over their shoulders. “I dreamt…I was back at the lab.”

“The lab?” Adrian echoed. 

He  remembered Master Splinter mentioning some of Tove’s past to him, how  the young tortoise was a result of human experimentation and had  eventually escaped their captors before being found by Donnie and  Mikey.  The rat hadn’t elaborated much beyond that, only stating that  Tove’s first few years in that lab were very hard for them.

“I  keep…I keep seeing their faces,” Tove whispered shakily. “I see their  white coats, and th-their…their needles.”  They scratched under their  neckerchief, where Adrian caught a glimpse of a barcode tattooed on  their right side of Tove’s neck.  

 “They wanted me to be their weapon.  They made me train, made me…h-hurt other creatures.  I didn’t want to, I never wanted to!” Tove was trembling violently, burying themselves in more  blankets as if to shield themselves from the painful memories.

“It’s  been so long since I escaped, but…I’ll never get away from them.  They  are still h-here, in my head.” Tove gazed feebly at Adrian, their words  coming out in broken sobs. “I have a f-family now, I should be  happy…w-why can’t I forget?”

Adrian hadn’t moved from his spot  on the couch the whole time Tove spoke, but inside his blood was  boiling with rage.  To do something like that to a child, to treat them  like some tool…he knew all too well what that pain felt like.

His  hands found the pendant around his neck once more, stroking the bright  green gem in the center.  He cast a sympathetic glance at Tove, now  understanding why they were hesitant to tell their brothers about their  nightmare.  

“I don’t think…you’ll ever forget,” he admitted, his voice low.  “Something like that doesn’t just go away.”  

Adrian  then turned to Tove, placing a gentle hand on their small shoulders.   He half expected the child to flinch at seeing his sharp claws, but Tove  made no such movements, staring up at him with a tear-stained face. 

In  the back of his mind, Adrian could remember a moment like this back in  his dimension, crying in the arms of the only family member who truly  understood him: His grandmother.  The same one who gave him the pendant  he now treasured more than anything, and who gave him advice he would  never forget.

“But that doesn’t mean you stop living, understand?  You control your destiny now.  You don’t have to do what those humans tell you to anymore.” 

“I…control my destiny?”  Tove repeated in wonderment.

“Yeah,  that’s right!”  Adrian lifted his hand, waving it wistfully over his  head.  “Life is short, and it’d be a waste if all you did was dwell on  the bad things that happened in the past.  With no one holding you back,  you can go anywhere, do anything!”

Tove’s eyes lit up at Adrian’s speech, but then furrowed their brows with worry.  “But…isn’t it scary, being all by yourself?”  

Adrian  shrugged. “Not really, I like being alone.  No one to boss me around.   I’ve had enough of being always told what to do.”  

“Is that why you ran away from your home, and why your parents were so angry?” Tove asked, causing Adrian to tense.  

 “Yeah, that and…other reasons,” he mumbled icily.

He  waited apprehensively for the inevitable barrage of questions from the  curious tortoise, but to Adrian’s surprise Tove didn’t pry any further.   Instead, they gathered some of their blankets and crawled over to him,  resting agaisnt his side.  

“I’m sorry your parents hurt you,”  Tove murmured sadly, patting his knee. “I hope you can be happy with our  family.   We won’t hold you back.”  

Adrian stared at the young  tortoise, taken aback.  He barely talked with Tove until now, yet still  the kid considered him family.  

Which made Adrian’s situation even worse.  What’s going to happen once Tove learned Adrian didn’t have much time left?

Adrian quickly banished those thoughts from his mind.  Don’t think about it, not right now…

 “Y-Yeah,  I know that,” he answered hesitantly. He shook his head to clear the  troubled thoughts brewing in his mind.  “A-Anyway, back on track.  Are  you feeling any better?”

“A little,” Tove nodded sleepily,  slinging Adrian’s arm over their shoulder and hugging it like a security  blanket.  “Thank you, Adri.  I like talking with you”

“Uh,  sure, no problem.” Adrian muttered awkwardly.  Man, why did kids have to  be so clingy? “Are you…ready to go back to bed yet?”

“Can we stay here a little longer?” Tove pleaded, their eyelids drooping.

Adrian  wanted to argue, but found he just didn’t have the strength to do it.   “Fine,” he sighed, defeated. “But no drooling on my scarf, got it?”

Tove said nothing, having finally drifted off to sleep.

“Guess  I’m stuck here the rest of the night,” Adrian mumbled, idly stroking  the top of Tove’s head as the young tortoise slept.  Adrian glanced down  at them, noticing their cheeks were still red from crying earlier.  He  heard them moan quietly as they dreamt, a sign that the nightmares  hadn’t fully gone away.  At this rate, the kid probably won’t get enough  sleep and feel exhausted in the morning.  

Adrian stopped  stroking Tove’s head, resting his palm on their forehead as he shut his  eyes. “Just breathe, Adrian,” he muttered, steeling himself.

He  concentrated as hard as he could, fighting against the familiar waves of  pain and dizziness as some of his healing magic flowed out of him and  into the tortoise sleeping on his lap.

Normally, Adrian  wouldn’t do this; in fact, he would use every excuse he could to not use  his power and reduce his lifespan even further.

But he decided he  could make an exception, at least this once. He’s already given so much  of his lifespan already; what’s a little more?

Adrian watched silently as Tove snuggled closer to him with a peaceful sigh. 

“Sleep well, kiddo,” he whispered.

“That’s sweet of you, Adri.”

“H-Huh?”   Adrian nearly bolted upright at the voice, catching Tove in his arms so  the slumbering tortoise wouldn’t fall off the couch.  Looking over his  shoulder, Adrian spotted a familiar silhouette of a teenaged turtle  wearing a purple bandanna.

“God, Donnie, don’t sneak up on me  like that!” hissed Adrian.  He then felt his face grow hot.  “W-What a  minute, how long have you been standing there?”

“Long enough,” Donnie replied with a smirk.  “You’re pretty good with kids.”

“Oooh no, don’t give me that look,” Adrian groaned. “Me and kids do not mix.   This was just a one-time thing.” He carefully picked Tove up and handed  them to their brother.  “H-Here, can you take them back to their room?”

“Of course,” Donnie chuckled, cradling his youngest sibling in his arms. “Thanks for taking care of them.”

 “Y-Yeah,” Adrian stammered, blushing.  

 Donnie  was about to return Tove to bed, but stopped before entering their  bedroom.  “Was there anything else going on, Adri?  I heard you leaving  your room earlier.  Did you need something?”

“Huh?  No, I was…” Adrian cast his eyes down, playing with his scarf to hide his guilt.  Come on, think of an excuse!

 “…just going to ask you if maybe tomorrow we skip training and hang out together?”

“Skip training?” Donnie raised a skeptical brow.  “I don’t know, Leo and Master Splinter might not approve…”

“Ahh,  let’s worry about them later,” Adrian scoffed playfully.  “It wouldn’t  hurt to take a break and have fun for a little while, right?  I promise  we’ll be back before they notice we left.”  He laid a hand on Donnie’s  shoulder, a sincere smile on his face.  “Besides, I want to thank you  for…for looking out for me. We can go anywhere you want, my treat!”

Donnie beamed at Adrian’s offer.  A chance to travel anywhere in the multiverse, and to spend more time with Adrian too… 

“You know what?  I think I’d like that. We can sneak out before the others wake up.”

“Can I go too?!”

Donnie  and Adrian nearly jumped out of their shells when Tove, now very much  awake, suddenly spoke up, their eyes twinkling with excitement.  

“Weren’t you just asleep a second ago?” gaped Adrian, clutching his chest as he tried catching his breath. Geez, this kind is even sneakier than me!

Tove seemed to ignore Adrian’s question, gazing eagerly at Donnie.  “Are you and Adri really going on a trip?” Tove asked their brother, bouncing in his arms with newfound energy.    

Donnie  rolled his eyes with a light-hearted sigh.  “We’ll talk about it later,  Tove.  Right now, you need to go to bed,” Donnie said, wagging a finger  before teasingly boobing their nose.

“Aww, please, can’t I go  with you?  Pleeeease?” the young tortoise begged, making their eyes  appear even bigger and more innocent looking.

“Sorry, Tove,  but this trip is just for Adrian and I, and it’s a secret,” Donnie  explained, smiling warmly at Adrian and making the teenaged tortoise’s  chest inexplicably flutter.

“Ugh, fine,” Tove pouted as they crossed their arms. “But…will you bring me back a treat?”

“It’s a deal,” Donnie laughed, nuzzling his forehead against Tove’s as his sibling giggled happily. 

 Adrian  watched the two of them with a fond smile.  He loved seeing this tender  side of Donnie, it was honestly cute to see him like this…

“You know, you wouldn’t make a bad parent yourself, Don,” he commented.

“O-Oh,  you think so?”  Donnie stammered as he blushed.  “Well, thank you,  that’s very, um, flattering. I’ll…see you in the morning, then?”

“You bet,” Adrian chuckled “see you in the morning.”

“Night, Adri, thanks again for everything,” Tove waved at their friend, resting their head under the crook of Donnie’s neck.

Adrian  gave them a small wave back.  “You’re welcome, little Banshee,” he  replied, using the special same nickname Tove’s brothers often called  them.

As he watched Donnie go, Tove dozing off in their  brother’s arms, Adrian couldn’t help but imagine a future where it was  their own child Donnie was carrying off to bed.  The thought made his  heart pound. 

A future like that seemed impossible…

But then  again, Adrian had believed he would never be able to escape from his  parents, that they would track him down and force him back into his  horrible old life with them in his home dimension.  

Now, he was safe, he was free.

Adrian  still had his weakened health to worry about, but…perhaps, while he was  here in this new dimension, with his new loving family, he could  entertain the impossible.