Failure

Albo 

we can talk aftermath stuff later when you're less deeaaaaad fjkalf

IneMiSol

hdlejfle im still gonna be around for a sec but

just not on call

Albo

oh well -jazz hands at you-

IneMiSol

auran definitely just hugged jiemba for 10 minutes straight

Albo 

but also you open today, is this a wise decision

IneMiSol 

no

but im hungry af

gdjdgd

Albo 

fair enough, we continue

IneMiSol

i did not eat dinner

just popcorn and soup

so yes jiemba is gonna just be hugged for a good while

Albo 

God  

i imagine he hugged him the whole car ride back and jiemba hugs him back, just running his fingers through his hair

IneMiSol 

yeah

very silent

Albo 

he doesn't have a whole to say, because there isn't a lot say cuz damn

IneMiSol 

yeah aurans just rly quiet buried in his own thoughts

probably only talks again when they get to the hotel

Albo 

the quietest both of them have been, because Jiemba is also lost in his own mind. This is a lot to take in.  

Jiemba isn't too eager to get into the building, so maybe they can sit outside for a bit? Def waits til Auran is ready to talk...

IneMiSol 

yeaaa

hes still just holding onto jiemba

and then just

the quietest "... im a fuckin failure..."

"i cant-- i cant fight"

"im useless in a fight i cant protect any of you"

"i couldnt even-- make the right fuckin decision on who to shield,,"

Albo 

Jiemba gives him a concerned look, "Auran, babe, you aren't a failure...tonight was INTSENSE, a LOT of shit went down..." 

"And you aren't useless...don't blame yourself, please" 

"You had the best intentions...and in the end, we were...successful...as we could be"

He doesn't even sound like he believes that last part....

IneMiSol 

aurans just making a face

"no, i-- if something had actually happened and i needed to protect someone"

"i couldnt"

"i dont have strength and none of my weapons are... made for hurting"

"i dont... like hurting people"

"but against people like that? actual dangerous people, who are trying to kill everyone in their path and are moved by nothing but hatred for anyone different from them??"

"i cant do anything about that"

"the triplets still lost their family, everyone got hurt, and i couldnt even land a single attack"

"it just--" frustrated sigh "feels so hopeless"

"i wish i could just-- heal people like Wisty, or actually do real damage like David--"

just gripping at his own hair with his eyes shut

Albo 

"Auran...." Jiemba moves to gently grab his wrists "Auran, I need to you look me, please..."

IneMiSol

looks up at him but only vaguely loosens the grip on his hair

def looks like hes beginning to hyperventilate again

Albo 

Jiemba's eyes are soft, but its...very obvious he's hurt and upset about what happened tonight himself but "You aren't Wisty. You aren't David. And I'll say it again, you aren't useless or a failure." 

"Its damn unfair and unkind to compare yourself to the shit other people pull because no one else is expecting that of you. " 

"Its fcking awful what the triplets are going through and by god i...I hate it." His lip seems to quiver a bit "But as hopeless as it feels right now, there's always something we can do" 

"As long as you're breathing, nothing is hopeless..." 

"If you need help with weapons training?? I can help you, SC can help you..." 

"If you need help with your powers, SC has already shown they can help there too...just...." 

"You can't focus and dwell on what you feel you can't do. That won't make you any better, baby..." 

"Wishing doesn't makes shit happen..."

IneMiSol

his face looks like hes gonna start crying again but he doesnt, just taking deep breaths to calm down

finally lets go of his hair

drops himself against jiemba with a whine and hugs him again

face buried

".... i know.... sorry....."

Albo 

He gets a loving squeeze back "You have nothing to apologize for..." 

Jiemba kisses him gently on his head "Though I hope I didn't come off as...dismissive of how you feel though"

"Im just  one of your biggest fans and I think you're capable of a whole damn lot of good so...." 

"When you feel...less than capable, I take that personally..." a half hearted chuckle

"You just mean that much to me"

IneMiSol 

auran just hugs him tighter in silence

boys rly not feeling gucci

".... 'ts just... feeling very powerless to do anything"

"like im just hindering all of you, im just another target to account for instead of... helping"

"but thats... kinda how its always been anyway..."

"only thing im good at doing is being a meat shield, and what good does that make me"

half sarcastic chuckle

goes quiet again bc he just feels like hes pulling a pity party and no one needs to hear that!

Albo

When a positive force meets a self depreciating object = this conversation

IneMiSol 

hfsmbflsksl

Albo

Opposites attract

IneMiSol

im sorry jiemba

Albo 

FHSJXHSJ  Jiemba is fiiine! He's glad that Auran is being honest and open about how he feels 

Despite how he disagrees with every word he's saying

IneMiSol

hflsjdlw jiemba

auran just rly quietly mumbling "... shoulda shielded wisty... then she wouldnt have gotten hurt again..."

Albo

Jiemba's nose just wrinkles, is obvious disagreement

But he doesn't comment on it, just letting Auran get it out

"There's no way you could have known.."

"And honestly, you know good ans well Wisty would fight you if she knew you felt like you were at some sort of fault"

"And I know you would fight me if I was shit talking myself the same way you are so...forgive me if I don't agree a word you're saying"

"I think you're goddamn  amazing, and I'll say it til you shut me up or start believing it yourself."

IneMiSol

is he chuckling or sobbing, no one can tell

(its a chuckle)

"right, right..."

Albo

"I am right, fck you" 

"But with affection" 

"Because you mean alot to me"

"With your pessimistic ass"

IneMiSol 

snorts

"god let me be pessimistic in peace"

but hes smiling

takes a deep breath and finally relaxes a bit

"......... still dont believe you but we can pretend to agree"

Albo

"N e v e r" 

He smiles back though  "A shit compromise, but I can agree to disagree" 

Listen, the smile is enough for him

"I think I'm ready to go inside now, if you are? I need a hot soak and you could probably use one too"

IneMiSol

"yeah,,, I need to chill and to get into actually comfortable clothes"

"and to find David"

holds jiemba's face and kisses him

Albo

"We can invite him to the hot soak party and chill" he nods very enthusiastically  

Boyfriends chilling together is ALWAYS a treat "raid his room, there's not that many people in ther--"

Oh he's been kissed 😳

IneMiSol

"hehehe"

"yeah honestly crashing in his room sounds good"

Albo

Jiemba smiling stupidly from kiss, he's so down bad

Snaps out of it "Hella, should we shoot him  a  text or literally crash his room?"

IneMiSol 

"brain says text but heart says crash......"

Albo

Jiemba grins mischievously and grabs his hand, "then we crash~"

IneMiSol

auran giggling and running after him

dumbasses

off they go

Albo

They're so stupid  

But y'know GROWTH

And y know jiemba is probably gonna talk to David like "I need you on my side, Auran is being extra pessimistic again 😤"

IneMiSol 

yeaaahhhh

good luck jiemba

Albo

More like good luck Auran  

Jiemba is tenacious

IneMiSol

: );

he's at least now more just

sad

rather than getting pissy when pushed

Albo

Yeah, he's is def improved and jiemba is less scared TO push To a certain point