Bitter-sweet

Arlo hadn't actually expected to see Forte walk towards him, they both stop for a moment and he swears that his heart beat is loud enough to hear.

"Ah... Um, sorry Arlo, I'll just... Go the other way."

And with that the spell is broken, he's leaving again, he hates you because you're a fucking freak who can't express his own feelings, pull yourself together Arlo! In a flash of motion Arlo darts forwards to catch Forte's hand in a surprisingly gentle fashion.

"Wait."

Forte stares at him, is that fear? He deserves it if so, he shouldn't be loved, he's done nothing to be worthy of it. Letting go of Forte's hand in a hurry he rifles through his bag to procure a plushy. 

It's old, with the undeniable scent of vanilla that follows Arlo everywhere. Though despite the years it's clearly been well looked after, it's still soft with no signs of tears in sight.

"You... You probably want this back."

He doesn't deserve it.

He doesn't deserve the kindness it holds.

Pushing his prized possession into Forte's hands Arlo takes a tentative step back and raises his shoulders, he should leave, Forte clearly hates his presence, as he should. Arlo's been nothing but a fucking asshole after all. Turning around before he could be perceived as weak Arlo calls to Forte over his shoulder.

"Good luck by the way, if you need a favour I'll... Yeah, I'll make sure it's done."

That's the very least he could do anyway.

Walking away he listens to the own tap tap tapping of his feet, it's soothing, a reminder of something yet to fail him, it's stupid he knows but no one has to know about his little victories. He almost doesn't hear the hurried footsteps rapidly coming his way, his ears prick to pick up the sound better. 

Who's footsteps are those? One of his associates attempting to bother him with another thing that he genuinely doesn't care about? Or maybe it's one of the newer idols vying for his attention in an attempt to get in the good graces of a top idol?

Whatever it is, it's likely not worth his time of day.

He didn't think it would be Forte, nor did he expect the front of his shirt to be bunched up in Forte's fist. Arlo is about to ask Forte what is wrong before being silenced by a simple kiss, he doesn't even recognise what it is for a minute, his whole world coming to an immediate halt right there and then.

It's a simple gesture, a chaste kiss, sweet, soft, gentle, and everything that he didn't realise that he needed so much. 

"You... You can't give gifts back, it's a rule."

Arlo doesn't register the plushy being pushed back into his hands, how could he? He's too stunned by Forte's simple action, nor does he realise that he's crying. Does he actually have a chance? Is this all just a giant sick joke designed to make him look a fool?

Who the fuck knows.

Catching ahold of Forte's waist before the younger idol can attempt to escape he pulls the both of them into a rarely used hallway. Stopping inches away from Forte's face he lets out a shakey exhale of breath.

"That... That could have ruined your career..."

His grip tightens but still remains undeniably gentle, as if he were afraid that Forte would run if he was too harsh. Slowly he comes closer and captures Forte's lips into another kiss, this time expected, less sudden, he's so soft.

Pulling away after a moment, Arlo averts his eyes red faced before letting go and whispers a hurried apology under his breath then retreats quickly covering his mouth.

Now the rush has worn off he's fucking terrified, what's going to happen to him? God what's going to happen to Forte? What if he single-handedly ruined Forte's entire career because a stupid selfish gesture? 

His speed walk turns into a run and his run turns into a sprint, he needs to avoid Forte and stop seeking him out to fulfil his selfish desire to be loved.

It's better that way.

Because that way he can't possibly hurt him.