"Who did you lose?" Ichigo asked, curious.

Rukia pondered the question for a moment before answering.

"His name was Kaien Shiba. He had the same face as you, but his hair was black instead of orange, and he was taller... His voice was different too. Older than you. He meant the world to me, but he died. And it was my fault." Rukia explained to Ichigo as the two sat underneath the bridge. Ichigo looked at Rukia slowly and his eyes saddened sympathetically.

"Hey, come on. Remember what we said about my mum-"

"That's different."

"How? Isn't it just another case of blaming yourself for the other's death when it isn't your fault?" Rukia bit her lip and averted her gaze, her hood covering her pained expression.

"Ichigo... In a lot of universe's... In most of them, actually. Spider-Man is the one who causes the death of someone they love dearly. And by causes, I mean... I mean directly kills." She took a deep breath and looked up at the river, and Ichigo could see the tears forming in her eyes. "When I say Kaien's death is my fault, I mean it. I- I killed Kaien Shiba. He turned into a- a monster called Metastacia. I- I didn't know it was him. Until I- I defeated him and he turned back to normal. And he- he thanked me..." Her tears fell, flowing up her face. She looked down quickly and curled up as she let out a sob, "he thanked me for killing him!" Ichigo shuffled over and pulled her close with one arm, which only prompted Rukia to quickly grasp her arms around Ichigo and cry into his chest. Ichigo hugged her back, rubbing her back gently with a sad sigh. 

"I'll never forgive myself for it... Yet he- he forgave me... I don't know why- and I don't think I'll ever know why!" Rukia sobbed loudly, "I- I thought I had gotten past the emotions, but..."

"You cared about him a lot, and you were clearly close to him. I don't blame you for still being upset about it. I don't think he'd like seeing you beat yourself up over it. He sounds like he was a kind man."

"He um... I was 14 when it happened. He was 17."

"So it's been two years?" Ichigo asked and Rukia slowly nodded. "That's still very recent for it to have happened... Don't beat yourself up over it."

"Yeah..." Rukia slowly let go and sniffed, "I know... But it's still hard to accept, y'know?"