The Sunset Symphony

Laughter is such a sweet sound. It permeates the air and spreads like the delectable aroma of fresh apple pie. There’s a slight variation in each; each voice sings a separate note, but together they are a symphony. Every esk tends to the land they call their own in a different way. The world, then, is a symphony and esk are its instruments. 

There are the little pipers and slight fiddlers, outrageous trumpeters and bassy rumblers, and elegant violinists and rambunctious drummers. All throughout the vast landscape of their ethereal existence, nature hears their song. 

Belladonna preferred to play a different tune than those of her more illustrious counterparts. While making friends and providing joint kindness to the world seemed to be a fundamental part of esk culture, there was something odd about it, too. It felt almost cheap, the way every esk seemed to get along with one another without conflict. Surely not every esk agreed on the same factors of their existence as she did?

Bella’s meadow felt too small with no one there to play with her within it. Sure there was the occasional passerby, but they were all just like the rest: present for a short interaction and nothing more. Lasting friendships felt so far away from Bella, as if strong bonds between esk to last the second lifetime were simply unattainable. Boundaries had never felt so constricting as they did when her beautiful bouquet of flowers disappeared upon stepping outside of it. Though they did not leave her immediately, Bella would feel their presence fade as the plains shifted into the developed cities or shaded forests. The meadow was supposed to be her home—she knew that. It was an unconscious feeling she felt deep inside of her, a simple knowing that was both inexplicable and irrefutable. But when the flora called her boundary and her form home alongside her simply vanished once she left her boundary, Bella couldn’t help feeling as though she couldn’t exist outside of it. With so little visitors on such long, languid days… she realized she might be the only esk in the world to live out here. 

It didn’t bother her at first. She could do fine on her own—there was plenty to see in terms of plants and animals, and the occasional human was sure to stop by and cause a ruckus. But eventually even the golden sunburnt grass felt dull. Every day the sun rose to the same picturesque scene she’d looked upon since her birth. Try as she might, there was nothing new to be found within the confines of this open meadow, and lingering fear drove her away from venturing past its invisible walls.

There was one day when an esk or two visited her boundary. As they chatted and discussed things Bella knew would become meaningless on the dawn of the following day, she was struck with an idea. Though it was too late to try it then, she bid goodbye to her visitors and waited for new travelers to arrive.

Thankfully she did not have to wait long. Her first visitor arrived in the form of a tiny little fungi morph calling itself Shroomie. Bella watched warily as she tracked mud all over the meadow, making little splish sploosh splorp sounds as she went. She looks almost like a baby goat, she mused. 

“Hello!” Shroomie greeted her with a bright look in her eyes. 

Belladonna nodded to her in kind. Greetings were standard, overused. Over her lifetime as an esk, she must have heard over a thousand “hellos” aimed toward fostering a healthy friendship. None of them had managed to stick with her, though, so Bella had decided to reinvent first impressions. 

“Hi there,” Belladonna replied, though this was the second time she’d said it since learning the esk’s name moments before. 

“What’s your name? I haven’t seen you around before.”

Ah, the fun part.

Bella considered for a moment, then lowered her voice an octave and dipped her head in a mock bow. 

“I am Bob. I am a He.”

“Oooh hi, Bob! You have such a lovely boundary!” Shroomie dashed off into the grass, splattering mud every which way. The little esk had no nature features—most that visited Bella’s boundary didn’t—but nevertheless she seemed happy. The fact that she was able to produce this much of it outside of her biome made Bella a little frightened of what her boundary looked like.

“Thank you,” Bella replied, as was customary. 

She followed the esk as she skittered and slid through trails of mud and painted the grasses brown. It was a new look for the meadow, that much was for sure. Bella actually found herself enjoying the smaller esk’s presence and was sad to see her go when she finally stopped to say goodbye. This is normal, she reminded herself. Nobody stays for long around these parts. 

Bella recalled how every other esk seemed to have a journey in mind. Each of them traveled across the world searching for something, or perhaps for someone—she was never privy to the details. She couldn’t help wondering where their journeys came from, and why she couldn’t find hers.

The second visitor was an esk quite unlike anything Bella had ever seen before. She reminded her of the crones she vaguely remembered from storybooks. The esk’s back was hunched and she had a long neck with a head resembling a bird’s. The flecked fur on her back reminded Bella of the stars. 

Instead of immediately greeting Bella on sight, however, the esk walked up and stared at her calmly. Bella waited for her to say something, but when she didn’t she figured it was best to give her name first and started to speak.

“Hello, I’m—”

“Hello, you,” the strange esk said. After a moment, they followed up with, “—live here?”

Bella paused. “Yes, I do. I’m—” she broke off, realizing that other esks were usually the ones who asked her for her name. 

The esk tilted her head at her like a bird peering at its lunch. The motion was so sudden that it startled Bella and she took a step back. The stranger moved its head up and down, this way and that—so much that Bella wondered if she had a kink in her neck. She didn’t know what to say, so she remained silent as the stranger examined her. 

Finally the words burst out of her, as if the floodgates had been opened for a brief moment only to crash shut again: “Like me?”

“Am I like you?” The response was immediate, instinctual. Bella took a moment to think before speaking again. “No, not in the way that you think anyway. I’m just me. But who are you?” By this point she was curious. 

“Dae!” The tone was light and singsong, like a bird had taken over the esk’s body to broadcast its mating call. This outburst was followed by more chirps of “Dae! Dae!” before Bella politely told her to quiet down so that she could get a word in. 

“Well, my name is Lilith,” Bella said proudly. It’s a very pretty name if I do say so myself. A name befitting someone of my stature.

“Lil…!” Dae trailed off. Nodding to herself, she promptly turned away and began to trek back the way she’d come. 

“Hey, wait!” Bella raced after her. She’s barely stayed a moment!

“Mee-eting new…” Dae mumbled as she strolled along.

Dae moved as if she didn’t have a care in the world, head swaying gently with each step. Bringing up the rear, Bella tried desperately to engage the strange esk’s attention. Alas, she was met with nothing more than the occasional head tilt and puzzled side eye. Eventually Dae crossed over into the forest and disappeared among the trees. Bella didn’t bother to follow her. 

It was several days later that she happened across Shroomie again. This time she was accompanied by a headstrong looking esk, a fellow fungi morph. Both were tiny and, Bella had to admit, adorable. Neither esk boasted any nature features, but while Shroomie tracked mud in a long zigzagging trail behind her, this newcomer was flanked by three giant flickering silhouettes of wolves that made Bella feel as tiny as her visitors. The shapes were muddled and confused, but she could just make out the head, nose, and eyes. They appeared to be made up of shadow and ink. Each step added a puddle of the dark, viscous substance to Shroomie’s muddy path. There was also ink to be found on the new esk’s form. The way it coated his false ears and dripped over his head like a crown reminded Bella of ice cream. 

Chocolate sauce drizzled over sweet vanilla ice cream. Mm, it made Bella hungry. With a pang she remembered that esks could not eat, and she hastily buried the memory. Recollections of human life always seemed to get to her like this, no matter how hard she tried to ignore them. She couldn’t decide whether she was happy to live so far from the world of humans, or if she still missed their bustling and unique way of life. It felt odd to distinguish the world of humans and the world of esk as different lifestyles—after all, one was the land of the living and the other was merely an echo of their existence. If anything, the world of esk should be considered something akin to the afterlife. How else would they be living this existence that shouldn’t live? 

It took a moment for Shroomie to notice her, but Bella waited patiently until she caught sight of her and dashed to greet her. The other esk was slower to follow. He took his time as he walked, as if he too meant to create art with the misshapen trail of ink he left behind. Bella found him regal, almost. 

“Hi, Bob!” Shroomie’s greeting felt like a ray of sunshine on her bleak gray morning. She wasn’t sure what to think of that. 

Bella pretended to look confused, though there wasn’t much she could do about her expression. A tilt of her head and a quizzical rumble would do. 

“I’m not Bob.” 

Shroomie skidded to a stop. “You’re… not?”

Bella noticed the form of Shroomie’s companion stiffen. She felt a strange frequency emanating from him, as if he was attempting to appear larger than he actually was. Bella figured the giant shadow wolves did the trick, so what other reason would there be for this esk to worry about appearances? 

“Of course not.” Bella responded to Shroomie’s confusion with an air of entitlement, as if it was her fault she’d gotten the names mixed up. “I’m Don, remember?” 

The new esk stepped forward. He couldn’t be much bigger than Shroomie—an inch or two at most, if Bella wanted to get all technical and measure heights—but he seemed to tower over her. 

“Shroomie introduced you to me as Bob,” he said. 

“He said his name was Bob,” Shroomie confirmed, turning to face the other esk. 

“I am a They,” Bella sniffed. 

Shroomie stared at her as if she’d grown a second head. I might as well have, Bella mused. This is actually kind of fun. While Shroomie looked utterly baffled by the sudden change in names, her companion seemed more suspicious. Perhaps he’ll call me out.

“That can’t be true, you told Shroomie you were a He,” the stranger said. 

“I never said that,” Bella replied flatly. Besides, considering pronouns can be fluid, he hardly has a leg to stand on. “In fact, I have no idea who you are. At least Shroomie introduced herself when she first met me.” 

The shadows paced and shifted—Bella could’ve sworn she heard a growl. It was a faint sound, even through telepathy, but it was there. Almost like a bassy rumble, an uneven tempo. She hated to admit that it unsettled her. 

A period of silence followed. Shroomie tentatively urged “Rowan” to introduce himself because it was polite, and after some debate that Bella pretended not to overhear, the esk relented. She wondered why he was so touchy about giving out his name. Stubborn, maybe? No, he couldn’t have withheld it just because she’d asked. Esk gave out their names so much they practically flew off the shelves. Was he just out of stock, then?

“Fine, since Shroomie asked…“ he paused for dramatic effect. “I’m Rowan.”

“Nice to meet you, Rowan. I’m Bob, and I—” Bella broke off to stop herself from bursting out laughing at the sight of Rowan’s expression. 

The little ink esk looked like he wanted to barrage her with a string of insults so intense she wouldn’t know what to do with them. Violence was never a trait inherited by esk from their past life, but Bella thought it was funny to envision how badly Rowan probably wanted to hit a tree right now. Unfortunately for him, there were no trees in the immediate vicinity—only dry grass and mischievous spirits. 

Shadows and ink bristled with Rowan’s fur, but Bella knew better than to fear him now. So far he’s only accepted that there was a change in names, not that she was deceiving him by withholding her own name. If he hadn’t figured that out, perhaps she’d been wrong about him before. Sure, he tried his best to look intimidating, but when it came down to the wire Rowan’s bark was a lot worse than his bite. 

“Come on Shroomie, we’re leaving.” Rowan turned his back on Bella and stalked away. 

“Hey, wait!” Shroomie let out a sigh of frustration and mumbled a disgruntled apology. “Sorry Bob—Don. I’ll come and visit again!” 

“Goodbye!” Bella called after her. Once they left, she took a look around and suppressed a sigh. There’s mud and ink in my meadow. Mud and ink. Oh, I wish it would rain. 

Part of her didn’t want to clean up after the mess Shroomie and Rowan had left behind. She could leave the haphazard ink and mud-stricken earth alone, just so that the meadow would look different for once. Strangely, this brought Bella a sense of comfort. If strangers could make a lasting difference within her boundary, then perhaps so could she. It would certainly help with her boredom. 

Bella approached a particularly thick spread of mud and poked it with one paw. Schlop. It felt so slimy, so weird. What am I doing, Belladonna thought with a sigh. I’m not a human. But she pressed her paw into the mud anyway and tried to ignore how the cold, wet substance oozed between her toes and squished under her weight. Eventually her apprehension subsided and Bella began spreading the mud around, admiring how it refurbished the meadow in a new coat of paint. She wasn’t sure how long she spent playing with it. It had been some time since she had felt this way when she wasn’t doing something routine. What was it again?

Fun. Bella was playing and she was having fun. 

It didn’t surprise her when the mud faded and the ink disappeared, slipping away like remnants of a faded memory. Nothing ever lasted long around here. That was the consequence of existing as an esk: ephemeralism. Bella longed for something more than the transitory, fleeting moments of her life. 

The next visitor was a fellow esk of the plains, a spirit her size donning colors of blue and green. He reminded her almost of a blueberry bush, or the view of the mountains and the bright blue sky from the treetops. He certainly fit the part of berry bush. This stranger held himself proudly—similar to Rowan, Bella noted—and boasted thick, fluffy fur that formed a mane on his back. Clusters of grape hyacinths hung by the esk’s face like earrings, and a glowing horn protruded from his forehead like a blaze of glory.

Bella noticed that the stranger had striped markings on his chest similar to a human ribcage. She saw fit to point it out when he approached her. 

“Oh, these?” he turned so that Bella could get a better look at the side of his chest. “These are just markings. Gives me a little style, you know?”

“I can see that,” Bella agreed. “Forgive me, I’ve forgotten my manners. My name is Donna. I am a She.”

“Lovely to meet you, Donna! I’m Bluebell,” the stranger replied.

Bella nodded politely, eyes narrowing in satisfaction. The trap was set. Now all she had to do was wait. In the meantime, she decided it was time to take initiative (standing around chatting was beginning to bore her) and offered to take Bluebell on a tour of her boundary. He enthusiastically agreed, and so the two of them set off to explore the meadow together. 

Bella—though she referred to herself as Donna around Bluebell—showed him around the place. She pointed out the best places to sunbathe, the rabbit holes, where the dust storms kicked up when the winds were feisty, and where the flowers were. Yes, she couldn’t forget the flowers. Bella herself was particularly attached to the wild indigo and snow-on-the-mountain flowers that grew here and there around the meadow. They were perfect reflections of herself, as precious as if they were her own children. She cautioned Bluebell not to trample them. 

Bluebell seemed to be quite the polite esk, although he loved to point out how amazing he was regarding, well, a lot of things. When he challenged Bella to a race and lost, he congratulated her on her victory but continued to praise his own skills. Every time she pointed out something nice about him, his tail would curl back and he’d hum happily—but he’d go on and on about how kind Bella was. 

She eventually asked Bluebell what he thought of her, and after a moment’s pause he’d said: “Well that’s easy. I think you’re beautiful.”

All life is beautiful. The thought was there and then it was gone, like a message sent from a distant wind. A leaf passing by through a hurried breeze, the meaning glimpsed and then vanished. 

Bella hadn’t expected that. “Oh, thank you! And… you’re beautiful too!” she added hastily. It would be horrible if I seemed rude. 

She considered telling Bluebell her real name, but a part of her still wanted to have her fun. After the tour was finished, Bluebell went on his way and she bid him farewell. The sun set over the hills and another day was at its end. This time, though, Bella felt as if she had accomplished something. Somewhere out there, someone knew who she was. 

Alas, the tiny visitors returned and Bella was forced to seriously consider the possibility that the world was overrun with small, fluffy cute things. These two weren’t Rowan and Shroomie, however (firstly they were much too small, secondly they were much too cute, and thirdly they did not do Bella the service of tracking mud and ink all over her finely-spruced meadow). Instead, she found herself faced with a little gray esk and a little yellow one, both missing their nature features. Hence, they weren’t from around here, as many esk weren’t. More esk tended to travel abroad than not. 

“Hello!” Bella tried to keep her voice light. She tried not to stare at the stray bubbles of water struggling to hold themselves aloft over the yellow esk’s back. 

The yellow esk propped herself up with a boost of levitation so that she could see Bella over the grasses. Olive green eyes peered up at her from a cute pinched face of cream and brown. The gray esk was more hesitant, however. Bella struggled to see him through the blades of grass that shielded him from view. 

“Hey, there!” The first esk greeted Bella warmly. She turned to address her companion: “Elliot, won’t you come out? Look at this, a beautiful esk way bigger than us! You’ve got to say hello.”

Elliot cautiously relinquished his hiding place and joined the yellow esk, hovering in the air at Bella’s eye level. She could tell the little thing probably wasn’t used to esk her size. Her gaze softened and she gave a comforting hum, the closest she could get to an encouraging smile. Elliot’s composure brightened a little. 

“Hi,” Elliot said quietly.

“See, that wasn’t so hard!” The yellow esk gave him a playful nudge. “I’m Mina. Nice to meet you, stranger! What’s your name?”

“I’m Bella,” Bella replied warmly. I can always give them a different name later. She had to admit she found her heart melting from the overwhelming cuteness. Both of them are so sweet. Maybe they’ll stay…? “Would you like a tour around my boundary? You can ride on my back if you want.”

The words left her mind before she could stop them. Why had she offered them a piggyback ride, of all things? 

“Sure! We can’t stay long, we’re in quite a hurry actually… but we could spare some time to look around. Right, Elliot?” Mina said. 

“Yes, that sounds lovely,” Elliot agreed.

Bella couldn’t help feeling her spirit sink with disappointment. No one ever stays long, especially if they aren’t from the plains. But some time was better than nothing, so she allowed Mina and Elliot to climb onto her back and took them for a short right around the meadow. 

Flowers, grass, trees making shadows in the distance… Bella figured it was nothing these two hadn’t seen before, but she pointed it out anyway. What was a tour guide if everything didn’t seem new and amazing? She’d never been that good at entertainment, though. When they passed by near the city she tried to crack a joke about the skyscrapers, but she was almost certain the soft laughter she received was in response to the terrible quality of the joke rather than the punchline. But eventually their time came to an end. 

“I’m sorry, but we really have to go,” Mina said apologetically. “We’d love to come back and visit again some time, though! Bella, right?”

Exclamation marks struck through her mind. An opportunity! She kept her tone and body language neutral, as if the mixup didn’t bother her. 

“It’s Don, actually.”

Elliot paused from where he’d been self-consciously playing with Bella’s fur. “Don?”

“So sorry! I can’t believe I forgot your name. Don, then. We’ll see you again sometime!” Mina saved Bella from having to answer. 

“Of course! You’re welcome to stop by whenever you want,” Bella said. 

The esks exchanged goodbyes and Bella watched as the travelers disappeared into the sunset. Or, more accurately, they descended into the plants, never to be seen again. She figured it had to be a skill to possess a form so small it could blend in seamlessly with low-lying plants. Helpful, perhaps, for spying on humans when one so desired. Maybe they could teach her a thing or too.

But that would have to wait for another day. For now Bella returned to her favorite spot in the meadow, a sloping hill that gave her a view of the stars with no trees or buildings to distract her. The sky seemed darker tonight, but the stars shined just as bright. 

She wanted to see Shroomie and Rowan again. Then she could put her little experiment to the test. 

Days turned into weeks and weeks into months, until the time that had passed stretched so long that Bella no longer had a desire to count it. Calendars were a human thing, after all. Sun cycles, moon cycles, star cycles: all counting a meaningless inexorable existence. There was no purpose in a sunset that was doomed to repeat itself forever. Variations are what make things unique. Wouldn’t every esk be meaningless if they all shared the same face? But we’re still echoes, Belladonna thought. Even if we look different. 

Bella wanted to see an esk that acted differently from the rest. She needed to see and experience something that deviated from the mindless norm of whatever this existence was. Every esk seemed to fall into the same lapsing rhythm: tend to the land, travel the world, find your journey and meet others along the way. Share stories, make mischief, be yourself. There was a frightening lack of action that led to an existence that felt more like drifting than living. Passive, that was the word she was looking for. Her life was too passive. 

The next time Shroomie passed by her boundary, it wasn’t Rowan he was traveling with. Instead, to Bella’s surprise, she found Bluebell carrying the little esk on his back. She had no idea how he could stand Shroomie’s muddy paws getting tangled in his luxurious mane of fur, but she supposed it was the thought that counted. Shroomie waved with one paw when he saw her and almost fell over. 

Such a human gesture, Bella thought. She didn’t wave back. Bluebell, it seemed, was as enthusiastic as his smaller companion and hurried over to where Bella had been admiring the wildflowers. 

“Donna!” Bluebell called. 

“Hi, Don!” Shroomie chimed in.

“We have an important question,” Bluebell said once he’d reached her.

Oh, brother. 

“Very important!”

“We were wondering…”

“Are you a They or a She?”

Bella paused, as if considering. “I am Bob. I am a He.”

Bluebell stared at her, bewildered. “Wait, so you have multiple names.”

“No,” Bella replied bluntly. 

“That’s the name you gave me before! Bob!” Shroomie said. “Why did you say your name was Don, then?”

“You misheard me.”

“But I’m sure I heard you correctly…” Bluebell trailed off, muttering something about telepathic interference. 

“Yeah, you must be lying! There’s no other way. I’m sure you said your name was Don. Wait, was it Don or Bob you said first?” Shroomie said. 

“I’m not sure what you both are talking about. My name is Bob, it’s really not that hard to remember.”

“Well I’m sorry, but I could’ve sworn you said your name was Donna,” Bluebell mumbled. 

This fruitless banter continued until Bella finally noted the sun setting over the hillside. The conversation had gone nowhere, and both esk were thoroughly confused about Bella’s name. She had to admit, this was a much more entertaining pastime than going off on an adventure with an esk you’d just met to go find who knows what. Both parties were learning something here. 

Bluebell made up some excuse about having to check on the plants in his greenhouse and swiftly exited the meadow. Shroomie, on the other hand, elected to stay behind and question Bella further.

“So do you have multiple names, or are these all nicknames? C’mon, tell me your real name. You’ve got to have one!” 

Bella pretended to consider his request. “Fine, but you have to promise me you won’t tell anyone else.”

Shroomie perked up, emerald-green eyes beaming. “I promise!”

“It’s Lilith.”

Bella tried to ignore how disappointed she felt when Shroomie immediately fell for it. That was what he called her now, despite her efforts to dissuade him by giving him other names. She even told him to call her Bella once, but he shrugged it off as if it was just another nickname. He’s so gullible, Bella thought with a sigh. Is every esk this way? It sure seems like it. 

She had to admit she was surprised when she found Rowan searching for her among the meadow. Shroomie wasn’t with him this time—Bella could see no sign of the little esk or his muddy paws. Rowan, however, had no qualms about leaving ink all over her boundary. The flickering shadow wolves paced behind him restlessly, their forms disheveled and faded. Bella figured they must be quite the menace when the esk was at full strength in the heart of his boundary. 

“Hi, Rowan.”

“It’s King Rowan to you,” Rowan replied with a hint of a growl edging his tone. 

“Of course. My apologies, Your Majesty.”

So he wanted to hold a grudge? That was fine by her. Not enough esk picked a fight around here these days, anyway. 

“Listen, Lilith. I don’t have anything against your little name game, but you’ve got to stop picking on Shroomie.”

“Your Highness, I have no idea what you’re talking about.” 

Privately Bella was taken aback. What had given him the idea that she’d been trying to pick on Shroomie? All she wanted was to have a little fun. She wasn’t trying to be mean. 

“Lilith isn’t even your real name, is it? Neither are Don, or Bella, or Donna, or Belladonna. I’ve asked around, and everyone seems to know you by a different name. You’re just going around confusing other esk and then making fun of them. Well, it isn’t funny,” Rowan continued. 

“I think you have the wrong idea. I have a lot of nicknames, but my real name is Lilith,” Bella said, playing off the idea Shroomie had given her earlier. 

“I don’t believe you,” Rowan sniffed. “I don’t think you’ve given any esk your real name. You’re having too much fun, right?”

You’re wrong. I have given some esk my real name. You just haven’t realized it yet. 

“I don’t see how that has anything to do with this. I’m sorry that you think I’m picking on Shroomie, but I’m not. It’s not my fault if you mix up my name a couple times, and I really don’t mind. But it’s nothing to get worked up about.”

“Nothing to get worked up about? You’re making him feel terrible by making him think it’s his fault for getting your name wrong! Shroomie feels so guilty whenever he forgets another esk’s name. I have to watch him sulk around the trees all day long! Whenever he’s upset he comes to me, and he gets mud everywhere you know.”

And you get ink everywhere, Bella thought. But she understood where Rowan was coming from. She almost wished Shroomie would come to her instead of bothering Rowan. There’s no way she’d rant off to another esk about how annoying he was if he confided in her. 

“Look, I didn’t mean to hurt Shroomie’s feelings.” Bella paused to consider her next words.

“Well you did,” Rowan deadpanned.

“I get that.” She took a moment more, shrinking under Rowan’s merciless glare. “Look I’m sorry, okay? I’ll apologize.”

“See! I told you she’s nice!” Shroomie burst out of a nearby clump of bushes without warning, splashing mud everywhere. Bella flinched as mud flicked up into her face and toward her eyes. Shroomie turned to look up at her. “Right, Lilith?”

Bella shook her head. “I’m sorry, but that’s not my real name.”

“Told you,” Rowan muttered.

“What? But you said it was. You said your name was Lilith.” Shroomie’s enthusiasm died down and he sat down hard in the dry grass. “You lied to me?”

“It was a game.” She didn’t know what else to say. “But I’ll tell you my real name now, and I promise it’s not a lie.”

“Are you sure?” Shroomie said hesitantly, avoiding her gaze. 

“Of course. I’m sorry that I hurt your feelings.”

“It’s okay.” Shroomie swirled a paw around absent-mindedly in the mud pooling in front of him. “You’ll have to make it up to me, though. I know! You can come by my boundary sometime! I live in a tree in the forest.”

Rowan snorted. “More like on it.”

“Hey! I live inside that tree. You’ve seen it.”

Rowan snickered and Shroomie pointed his chin up defiantly. Bella, however, was stunned into silence. Leave my boundary? And lose everything that makes me beautiful, that makes me feel whole and real? The flowers meant everything to her. Without them, Bella was just a lifeless husk that longed only to travel in search of something she was sure she’d never find. That was the look she saw in the faces of the esk missing their nature features who passed by here. She didn’t want to be like that, she didn’t want to be lumped into some group of travelers. 

But Shroomie seemed so sweet. He could be a friend. It would be rude not to visit his boundary once and a while, right? He’d already come so far so many times to see her. That had to be worth something. 

Maybe she could try it, just once. It couldn’t be far. She could stay a little while and then hurry back to the meadow before the sun set. Then everything would be over and done with and she wouldn’t owe the little esk anything. She probably wouldn’t have to worry about Rowan coming by to nag her about it, either. 

“Okay, I can do that,” Bella agreed. “The forest, right?”

“Yep! We can show you the way.”

“Just follow the trail of muddy footprints,” Rowan said. 

Oh, we’re going now? Better to get it done sooner rather than later, I suppose. Bella nodded and followed the two little esk as they made their way to the edge of the meadow. She could feel the fear creeping up her back as she got closer and closer to the end of the familiar bunches of grass and wildflowers. As soon as she stepped outside of her boundary, Bella felt the existence of her nature features grow weaker. She knew that once she’d left the bounds of the plains biome, they would no longer be with her. She’d be a naked esk, a husk of life. At least Shroomie was here to distract her. 

This is okay, Bella thought. It’ll only be for a moment, and then I can go back home. 

“Hey Lilith,” Rowan beckoned her.

Bella turned to face him. “Yes?”

“What should we call you?”

“Oh yes, I almost forgot!” Shroomie pranced about in excitement. “New name! New name! What’s your real name, Lilith?”

Bella chuckled at the little esk’s excitement. This really means so much to him, huh. A thought struck her. Did I do that? Had she succeeded in giving herself some significance in this world? By withholding her real name and using different aliases, did that one world suddenly hold a different kind of value to this esk? Perhaps this is the way to go. I just have to make sure I don’t hurt anybody’s feelings. 

“Call me Bella,” she said. 

The afternoon glow of the setting sun looked so pretty from beneath the treetops.