Conversation Isn't Important Anyway

Coal tended to really value what little alone time he got to spend at the apartment. It didn’t happen often, between Piper and the amount of time he ended up spending out in the field or at his office at work, there was always something pulling at his attention. His drive to deliver for his clients never faltered, but burn-out was inevitable when it felt like he was the only one pushing. And worse still, the apartment had eventually managed to slip from ‘my place to stay’ into ‘my home’ territory, which made it impossible to want to do anything other than sleep and watch documentaries with his wife at 2am.

But, this morning Piper had a long shift at the training center, and he’d resolved to use that time to finish what work he had that didn’t require too much over-thinking. Paperwork, finances, and case reviews had stacked up a little too high over the past few weeks, as much as he just loved his favorite types of time wasters and stress inducers. Making ends meet was difficult sometimes, what with so much of his work being some degree of charity and Piper’s irregular paychecks, but in the end, it needed to be done and they always figured it out. They always figured it all out. 

So, he sat by himself in his makeshift home office, full of clutter and paper, post-its and long notes of leads pinned up on the walls, tips from Wyatt highlighted in red, and the odd picture scattered here or there. The desk really wasn’t large enough for all the junk, which meant digging through it all and cataloging it properly into his file cabinet, and getting into the file cabinet meant rehoming some of Piper’s stray equipment leaned against the doors, which made him groan just slightly.  The apartment really needed a good clean out, it was getting a little too claustrophobic for his liking.

He got in a few good hours of work, balancing their expenses and checking through a good portion of the stray paperwork from his cases, managing to separate his active and past documents at long last. He’d even managed to fire off a few emails to people of interest and family members about a missing persons case, and that felt good to have out of the way. It wouldn’t look like much to anyone else, and Piper would certainly give him grief about it, but he’d take what productivity he could get.

Around noon, the combined nibble of hunger and nicotine prodded at the back of his mind and, almost unwillingly, he urged himself up to take a break. A cook he was not by any stretch, but he could manage a sandwich. Maybe they’d order take-out for dinner, they hadn’t gone to that nice local place for a while, and it was just chilly enough to warrant some comfort food. He’d have to text Piper about it, maybe she’d grab it on her way home.

The balcony on their apartment wasn’t anything impressive, but it served its purpose just fine. They rarely spent time out here at all, honestly. It didn’t overlook anything pretty, just more bland city buildings and alleyways as far as the eye could see. But, there was the odd night when Coal would let himself out and sit at the small table to smoke and think, and Piper would come out shortly after, grumbling about getting cold by herself. He liked those nights, sitting together and sharing a blanket as they tried to spot the stars past the city lights. Standing by himself in the middle of the afternoon, tapping his fingers against the railing and slowly blowing smoke, he almost wished the sky would fall into night right now just to have another of those quiet evenings. He silently added that to the list of ‘to dos’, and laughed at himself for the sentimentality.

He let himself back into the small living room, craving satisfied, and was immediately met with the sound of a knock at the front door. Unusual. Piper never knocked(he’d more describe it as attempting to knock the door down, even though she had a key) and Wyatt always texted first. He sighed quietly, hoping it wasn’t the neighbors above them complaining about his smoking again. If he had to explain to them one more damn time-

He looked through the peephole but saw nothing, so he opened the door and found not his pretentious upstairs neighbors, but his parents.

Fuck.

His mother, a short, radiant looking woman by the name of Olive, threw her arms around him, paired with a grand slew of greetings in her heavy- mostly fake- accent. “Coal, my dear! My love, my wonderful baby boy!” She fawned and drawled, holding him by his arms and standing back to look at him, “It has been so long!” His father stood silently behind her, more watching the scene play out rather than participating in it. “Yes it has,” Coal finally managed a stunned response, “It has been quite a while.”  “Don’t look so happy to see us.” His father- Joel- mused. Passive aggressive, maybe, but Coal didn’t take it harder than he needed to. “May we come in?” She asked, but had already let herself in anyway with Joel following, so his answer wasn’t terribly important.

“I wasn’t told you were even in the country, let alone visiting my house-“ He started, in his own defense. “Dear, this is an apartment, hardly a home!” Coal bristled slightly, biting back a snide comment about his parents living in hotels as they helped themselves to a look around the apartment. Not that he remembered inviting them in. He resigned himself to the encounter and closed the door behind them anyway. They’d look, tell him all about their worldwide travels before getting bored of him and setting out into the city to find as many trinket shops as they could at 3 in the morning. Hardly an advisable course of action, but they had a long record of not listening to their son’s reasoning, and at this point he was over wasting his breath.

In a way, it was nice to see them, admittedly. They looked older, as they would, given that it had been several years since he’d seen them in person, but if nothing else they looked reasonably happy. He couldn’t ask for much else for them. “I assume you heard something from Harper.” He ventured, trying to make light conversation as they bounced from picture to few pictures on the walls and furniture. He and Pip were no interior designers, and lacked a lot in material sentimentality, but with the third member of their little family(fingers crossed) on the way, it had seemed appropriate to aim for something a bit less stale than their standard white walls. Piper had a few photos she really liked from her time in the military- ones not really ever discussed between them, but Coal knew why they meant something to her- and so they hung next to a few pictures of their limited travels together, some with their friends and coworkers, and Coal’s degree. The centerpiece of them all was the favorite of their wedding pictures. And now, it sat snugly between two extra frames, one full of ultrasound pictures and the other empty. Waiting. These, as the most important images, sat on their small buffet table, used almost exclusively as a dumping zone for keys, mail, receipts, and other various items prone to getting lost in pockets. None of these miscellaneous things had been removed from their usual place, given that the residents hadn’t been expecting any kind of company worth cleaning for. Coal was almost a little bit embarrassed by the mess, but then remembered that his parents were hypothetically supposed to be in Greenland or something, and he and Piper were busy living here.

“Ah, yes! She told us you were doing just wonderfully.” Olive chirped warmly, smiling faintly as she finished looking over the pictures on the wall, missing the ‘family’ photos entirely, before turning back to her younger child, “Told us you had a girlfriend that was quite something.” Coal frowned. Of course she had. “Do tell, dear! I wish to hear of your romantic endeavors.” “Don’t pry, Olive.” Her husband chided lowly, walking past his son and down towards the hallway, “The boy’s not obligated to tell anything.” “Oh I know, but I just want to know all about it! How serious it is, how long he’s known her, what she does for work- afterall, she has to be good enough for my baby boy, Joey.” Before he could even answer her first questions, she had passed right by him in pursuit of her husband. He didn’t even have a chance to stop them from venturing into the less guest friendly areas of the apartment before they’d poked into the bathroom and commented on the blander decor, and then into his office on the far end of the hall.

The office was definitely the worst of the mess in the entire place, a hulking file cabinet shoved into one corner and a gun cabinet in another— a new addition, much to Piper’s dismay (no longer did her first loves hang on the walls)—and somewhere in between was a large desk stacked much too high with paperwork and case files. If Coal had to describe the room in full honesty, it was an impressively accurate depiction of the inside of his head, which appropriately made everyone else cringe. His parents were no different, squeezing in to an already confined space to look at the interesting photos and note pages and stick notes plastered on the board hanging above the desk, lit unusually well by the large window on the adjacent wall. In-between that, there was low-breathed commentary on the excessive papers, the amount of weapons in the case, and some of Piper’s gym gear stacked up against the closet door in the right side. “This is all so fascinating, Coal.” His mother fawned in interest past the chatter with her husband, sifting through some of his notes and Coal immediately stepped in to stop her from mixing up his cases and their respective info. “You do have to tell me all about your job here! Quite the place for you to end up, you always said you hated cities!” True to form, before Coal could reply they were already moving on, his father mumbling disapprovingly about the gun rack in passing.

The urge to bang his head into the nearest wall was painfully tempting. And it would hold a better conversation at this rate, too.

By now, they’d ended up on the other end of the hallway and into the bedroom. Once Coal finally caught up, having had to stop to check his active paperwork was still where it was supposed to be, his mother had helped herself to opening the blinds and curtains in the room, complaining it was just too dark to see. Coal attempted to inform that the dark atmosphere was intentional, but was again lost somewhere between the two sets of ears not listening to him. It reminded him very much of his childhood and Coal twitched at the distinct, bitter taste resulting from the correlation; 37 years old and feeling like he was being treated like a toddler. In his own home.

“Coal do you…and your girlfriend live together?” His mother’s suddenly concerned tone shook him out of the desire to just fester in frustration. He blinked, not entirely sure what she was getting at- of course he and Piper lived togeth- “Because you know if she ends up not being the one for you, that’d be awful messy and I just don't know if I can endorse such reckless behavior.” She was talking again before he could, “Knowing how well off you are with your job, why I wouldn’t be surprised if she was just in it for the m-“ “Yes, she lives here.” Coal interrupted, finally managing to drive a wedge into her sentence. The look of almost horror on his mother’s face, and the disapproval on his father’s. He wanted to claw his own eyes out, how had they not noticed until this moment. The place obviously housed more than one person, and yet what gave it away was that the bed wasn’t made. “First off, I’m not well off,” He bit back every instinct to sound angry or passive aggressive. Still his parents, he was happy to see them. He loved them.

“But you-“ “I do a lot of charity work. Most of my work is for nothing, or very little.” His mother seemed shocked, which made sense. She’d never bothered asking about his job before. He wasn’t sure what his dad thought of that revelation. Likely unimpressed, a low-paying job meant less luxuries. Coal had never been much for materialism, a trait he figured came from constantly having to leave things behind, but his parents weren’t that way. They valued their expensive trinkets and clothes and their wealth to travel with. Anything less made you poor.

“Second, her name is Piper.” He moved in a way that very specifically indicated for them to leave the room, the first hint they managed to successfully catch.

“And we got married a year and a half ago.” Both parents stopped dead in their tracks.

“Married?!” The delight in Olive’s tone was tangible, her pitch high.

“Yes, married. So yes, she lives here.”

“Oh Coal I had no idea! We never even got an invite or we certainly would have been there, we would’ve thrown a marvelous wedding for you and invited only the most gracious guests and-”

“Our wedding was perfect. Everyone who needed to be there, was there.” He finally managed to shoo them back into the common area and his mother quickly sat herself down on the couch and set her hands on her knees in a gleeful image of anticipation, “Dear, I’m sure it was just lovely! And I’m sure my little boy looked so dashing! You have to tell me all about it, when was it-” Joel sat down shortly after her, eyeing a pack of cigarettes on the coffee table, passively letting his wife ramble for a moment before interrupting, “Those your wife’s?”

“No, those would be mine.” Coal quickly scooped them up and tucked them into their proper place, not wanting to stand the looks or the comments. He was already so tired. They’d only been here for half-an-hour or so. “Coaly I thought you quit?” He rubbed his forehead as the scolding began before assuring her that it was something he was working on.

Hadn’t stopped him when he was 14, but sure, now they’d scold him for the habit. 23 years late.

“…Well! Anyway, when was the wedding?” “May. It was the 23rd. It was a really nice, warm day. Even had-” There had been silence from them for a moment before his mother made a disappointed sound, “Oh, we were in China in May! Right Joey?” “Yes, trip of a lifetime that one.” His father agreed, and his mother quick launched into the details of their oversea travels.

Coal told himself that when it came to his parents, he’d finally reached a point of not being bothered by the glazing over of his life and everything important that had happened in it. But admittedly, the confirmation of not being good enough- his wedding to his favorite person not being special enough- to warrant interrupting their ‘trip of a lifetime’ had a bit more bite than he’d expected it to. Especially that they were so blatant in it.

The next hour was spent wordlessly listening to them recount their travels from the last- he assumed, but wasn’t sure- 3 years. They barely stopped for breath anywhere in between, and only a few minutes in Coal felt his ability to humor them slipping into dangerously low territory. Not that they required an answer from him as much as they required an audience. 

They talked about trains and planes and fascinating cultural experiences, region specific plants and gardens, celebrations and parties. They talked about Harper and her travels with them- the wonderful daughter that she was. They talked clothes in India and game hunting in Africa and the insane plane hopping to Australia.

They somehow made fantastic things sound so lifeless and stale.

Coal managed to break away a few times to collect his sanity, in which they kept going as if he wasn’t even there at all, or that the purpose was to tell him their stories, rather than each other. He figured they just liked listening to themselves talk, another trait he had managed to avoid inheriting. Harper wasn’t the same way, but they couldn’t all be unscathed.

Several hours after their arrival, the sun began to turn the sky a soft peachy orange, dropping lower in the sky ever passing minute and dowsing the small apartment living room in warm light. Only then did they seem aware of themselves and all the time they’d managed to waste.  Coal was absently eating the rest of his sandwich from hours earlier- they hadn’t let him ask if they wanted anything until they asked for water, so dry from talking so much- and checking his phone for something- anything. He wanted to text Wyatt for any excuse to leave in a hurry, but he remembered that the informant had his afternoon off- out of town with the Rockwells- and wouldn’t be around until much too late for him to be much use in this situation. Piper still hadn’t texted him either to say she’d be on her way home soon- ideally with dinner from that niche Chinese place they liked. He worried, somewhat. Hoped she was with someone keeping an eye on her.  

“So Coal, you must tell me about your travels!”  He looked up, almost taken aback at actually being addressed. His parents were looking expectantly at him.

“My travels…? I don’t travel.”

“Oh surely you must! You and your wife don’t go places? You must’ve gone somewhere exciting for the honeymoon?”

Coal frowned.

“We stayed in for our honeymoon and had a party with friends.” He paused, but it was obvious they were expecting more, and he felt himself get slightly self-conscious, “…We…go the beach sometimes, and we went to Georgia once on a work trip.”

“…I hope she’s not tying you down, son.” His father’s soft tone had never sounded more barbed, “It’s never good for someone to hold you in one place, especially if you have goals and dreams. And if they’re using love to do it, then shame on them”. Coal didn’t think himself a defensive person, but just the indication made him boil. His dreams were not the dreams they had for him, and they had the gall to blame that on Piper.

“She’s not. She’s a very adventurous person. We just don’t have anywhere to g- anywhere we want to go.”

“Well surely you could go and see Harper in Croatia! Everyone loves Europe, dear.”

“She’s been to Europe. I don’t think she loved it.” Coal felt like he was stuck in some kind of protective mode, tense and a bit anxious at whatever they were thinking about him and Piper. About how broken and purposeless they must be.

“Oh nonsense!” 

“I mean it. She was over there with the army. She’s in no rush to go back.”  At that, his parents paused. 

“Well, that explains all the guns.” Joel muttered, while Olive’s look of horror grew more concerned, “Coal, dear, are you sure that marrying someone like that was wise?” “…Mother, I track criminals. The hypocrisy I would be guilty of would be-“ “That’s different! You’re doing it to help people be safer. People who go overseas with the army, they go to kill people. What if she’s violent? Is she violent? You can tell me dear, it would be okay.”

“I can’t believe I’m having this discussion, I don’t-“

At that moment, the sound of the front door unlocking broke Coal out of what would have been an incredulous rant.  Oh good, oh wonderful, of course. Piper managed her way through the door, gym bag in one arm and dinner in the other—bless her, it was the Chinese place, too— immediately grumbling and ranting to herself, not bothering to look in the room past opening and closing the door and attempting to take off her shoes. 

“Coallll you absolute asshole, get in here and help me get this—“ As soon as she looked up and saw two strange people sitting in her living room, she froze. She looked between Coal and the other couple and grew very apologetic looking very fast. Between them, the insults were all out of banter, charm, experience and an almost-flirtiness, but it looked incredibly bad in-front of anyone else not in on the joke. She stood awkwardly in the foyer before Coal realized he should do something, standing up to meet her there.

“I didn’t know you were bringing clients here-“ She hissed accusingly as he took the heavier bag from her. “I didn’t.” Was the reply, “Those are my parents.”  If the color hadn’t drained from her before, it certainly had now. “…oh…” Coal set down her bag full of gear and then took the bag of food to take into the kitchen so she could sit and take off her shoes without hurting herself.  With that done, he cleared his throat and turned back to his parents, “This is Piper.” He introduced her simply, “Pip, these are my parents, Olive and Joel.”  By then, she’d gotten back up and slide up next to him, “Uh, hi the-“

She was cut off by an audible gasp.

“You’re pregnant!”

Even if he hadn’t been standing right next to her, hand against her back, Coal was sure he would’ve felt Pip’s mood sink like all of the oxygen had been sucked from the room. She hated that reaction enough as it was without it being her absent in-laws doing the awkward fawning, and certainly detested it even more under the weirdly unique circumstances. 

Olive was oblivious to her discomfort though, up from her seat and making her way to the two of them, no doubt to touch and prod and rub and Piper was practically turning to needles against his hand in anticipation. 

“I can’t believe it, Coal! Grandkids! You’re making your dad and I grandkids to love and spoil and cherish.” She was practically bubbling, hugging her son tight, “They’re going to be just perfect, knowing you, dear!”  “Congratulations,” Joel sounded only slightly less monotonous than normal, “Never thought you’d actually work up the nerve to keep the family name going.”

Coal wasn’t sure now if he was feeling mortified or angry. Maybe both? Either way, whatever it was also happened to be paired with Piper’s daggered glare.  This probably wasn’t helping his case to keep the baby.

As soon as Olive let her younger child go, she had her eyes set on Piper, face sparkling and excited, “You know, he always said he’d never have kids, but I always knew he’d change his mind!” That one stung significantly. She didn’t know what she was talking about, but both Coal and Piper were taking the entire brunt of the uneducated comments, and their inevitable aftermath. Piper was just seething, he could tell from her brow and her thin lips and all too rigid posture.  And then Olive reached for her stomach and if there was any a line to be drawn, Coal decided that was it. He beat his wife to it, knowing full well that the temptation for her to punch this woman would be incredibly strong. He managed to catch her hand and pull her up from a crouch, feigning his most genuine smile, “You know, it’s been a long day for us. Piper needs some quiet time, I have work to do, people to track down. Might be best to make this visit a two-part thing.” His mother’s face fell slightly, “Oh, Coal dear, we’re going to be on our next plane tomorrow afternoon! And we have a breakfast for 2 booked out right away in the morning- there won’t be time.”  “Well, then we’ll set something else up,” Coal made a small motion with his hand for Piper to sneak away while they were distracted, which she quickly took, ducking out and down towards the bedroom in a hurry.

“It’s really just time for us to wind down, so you should really finish your sightseeing while you can.”  Olive seemed torn for a moment, but Joel was already on his way to the door to collect their coats, ultimately urging her to comply. “Well…alright then.” She wrapped her son in another large hug before turning to follow her husband, already halfway out the door with a quick nod back to his child as a goodbye.

“Coal, you must let us know about the baby. We would love to some and see them right away!”

He didn’t say anything right away as she pulled on her coat and turned to leave.

“…It’s a her…And I will.”

Not like she’d answer him.

Olive looked surprised, but quickly beamed at the new information, so thrilled at the idea of a grandchild- a little baby granddaughter. She blew a kiss and said one more farewell before they closed the apartment door behind them and Coal felt like suddenly he could breathe again. It had never been that torturous before. Maybe he was just getting too old…?

“...What the hell was that?” Piper still sounded charged, but not aggressive now that they were alone. “Fuck if I know. They just showed up.” Coal replied distantly- tiredly, “They were here for 5 hours.”  “Jesus, you’re quite the trooper, babe,” She got a little closer, not entirely sure whether or not to hug him, “They always been that batshit crazy?”  “Whenever they were around, yes.” He rubbed his forehead, the inkling of a headache that had managed to sprout between his eyes suddenly pounding, “I think I need to sit down.”  Piper chuckled softly, finally deciding in favor of a quick hug, briefly nestling her head to his chest, “I’ll dish up food, then. You pick the show. Something all three of us can watch.”  Coal laughed at that, kissing the top of her head in a subtle appreciation, “Anything that doesn’t require talking sounds fine by me.”