First Snow

The chill that had overtaken the former warmth in the air was easy to notice for most, even if the change was subtle. For Hollyhop, however? The shift in the air from warm to cold had come on suddenly one morning. Not necessarily because he was different from other cats, but more so because he had been too damn busy to notice what was present before it was gone. Too busy with adjusting to his new surroundings in Ravenclan over the past moon, the calico tomcat didn’t notice the breeze that brushed against his pelt when he would go out hunting or patrolling until he awoke one morning and could see his breath lingering in the air. 

Confusion rattled his brain as he stared at the fog, which left as quickly as it came. It wasn’t leafbare yet, was it? No. Leaffall had just started, that would be impossible. Maybe his eyes are just playing tricks on him — another huff of air, followed by another cloud of his breath. Hollyhop blinks in surprise at the sight, his ears perking up before he lifts a paw to his muzzle. His pads are warm, but his nose… Shit, it’s freezing, and now that he’s thinking about it, the cold air clings to his spiked pelt as though he’s about to develop icicles on the tufted ends of his fur. 

Hollyhop’s confusion is replaced by a grimace, and then a stretch of his front limbs in an attempt to regain blood flow and the warmth that said blood flow would provide. Following the stretching of his legs, he slowly wills himself to stand on wobbly limbs, allowing whatever warmth that his nest had gathered during his rest to dissipate into the warrior’s den. Crinkling his nose, the calico tomcat glances over his shoulder and toward the few clanmates of his that still remained in the den, sleeping peacefully. 

The calico warrior feels jealousy — if not for the fact that they can find sleep easily, then for the fact that most of these cats likely feel right at home while he still feels like an uncertain stranger. Maybe that’s part of his problem, his lack of observance comes not from carelessness, but more so the need to belong. It’ll come with time, the tomcat thinks to himself as he exits his nest and the den. I just need to be patient. Although, such a thing had never been part of his skills even prior to his move. 

Hollyhop is barely two steps out of the den when his stomach offers a grumble, and then an ache that makes him crinkle his nose with irritation. So he doesn’t bother focusing on looking around to see what other changes that he’s missed in the weather or his surroundings, and focuses his attention on trotting toward the prey pile — mindful to avoid brushing against some of the kits running through camp, or warriors and queens alike attempting to go about their day. He reaches his destination with little issue and happily ducks his head down to grasp onto a dove. 

“Mornin’, Hops.” A voice both familiar and unfamiliar greets the tomcat, making him tilt his gaze upward at the brawny calico in front of him. Tawnysnarl offers a lazy smile, although she looks wide awake as if she’d already been up and doing her duties. Hollyhop would be both impressed and alarmed, had Tawnysnarl not proven herself to be a productive clanmate prior. So he smiles and decides that he won’t question her early-bird rising. “Morning, Tawny.” 

With the calico greeted, the tomcat lifts his head with the dove in his jaws and then offers a muffled smile. “Wanna eat with me? We can split the dove if you want.” He decides that it’s a better idea to not voice the concern that Tawnysnarl wouldn’t be satisfied with the prey — she looked far more bulky than he did in terms of muscle, after all. But there was no reason to be upsetting one of the only friends he had made here by making stupid comments because he couldn’t hold his tongue. 

“Sure,” Tawnysnarl grins, her head nodding in confirmation. “Where ya wanna sit?” Hollyhop offers an uneasy, sheepish shrug — he isn’t all that used to Ravenclan’s camp yet, and doesn’t quite know the best areas within the territory to enjoy an uninterrupted breakfast. “Not sure… Do you mind picking a spot?” 

“Yeah, no problem.” The she-cat replies, giving a roll of her shoulders before tilting her head in a silent ‘ follow me ‘ command, to which Hollyhop obliges by padding after the molly as she gets on the move. For someone with such short legs, it feels like she’s impossible to keep up with. The thought makes his skin warm with embarrassment, because, well, he’s got the longer legs out of the two of them — there’s no reason that she should be so ahead of him, right? “We can head just outside’a camp, by th’trees. Will block out the flurries coming down.” 

“The what?” Hollyhop blurts out, his eyes growing wide with surprise as Tawnysnarl glances over her shoulder and toward him. Her head tilts in confusion before she looks back ahead, the pair passing through the entry of camp with ease. “Th’... Th’snow?” She repeats, sounding as confused as Hollyhop feels. “What are ya, blind? Flurries been comin’ down all mornin’. I know it ain’t stickin’ yet, but it’s kinda hard ta miss if ya payin’ attention. Fuckin’ freezing out here, too.” 

Logically, it makes sense. Logically, Hollyhop knows that the kits who had been playing in camp must have left the Nursery because they saw their first snowfall and became excited, as any kitten would. Logically, Hollyhop should have known that his breath hanging in the air was a telltale sign that snow was right around the corner — they’re coming into Leaffall, after all. It’s not as though the sun is going to become warmer in colder moons. 

But nothing of logic comes out of Hollyhop’s mouth. Instead, he lets out an embarrassed “Oh.” Because what else is he supposed to say? 

Sorry, new friend that I’ve just barely made, I’ve been so preoccupied with the fact that I left my family and all that I’ve ever known behind in Lynxclan to join a clan that I don’t really know anyone in, that I hardly noticed that not only has the fire come to a stop, and the weather is changing. You know, that thing it does every moon cycle.

There’s a lump in his throat forming from embarrassment and something else, maybe something sad, he can’t really tell, and it causes him to clear his throat as his paws come to a stop when Tawnysnarl halts ahead of him. Hollyhop looks at the ground and takes in the sight of the pine needles and leaves scattered across the dirt and grass — little specks of white snow come tumbling down to land upon them, only to melt once they reach their target. 

Tawnysnarl waves a forgiving paw in front of him and then knocks it against his shoulder with a laugh. “Hey, ya don’t gotta look all upset. A lot’s been happenin’, ‘m sure ya just been a bit overwhelmed. ‘Sides, it only started this morning… And last I saw ya, ya was knocked out cold.” 

Hollyhop wants to tell her that it’s not just the change in weather that’s bothering him, because it’s not. There’s quite a lot on his mind, really — a lot of insecurities, fears, a need to do what’s right by his clan… Wanting to go back to something familiar, but not wanting to re-experience the anxiety and apprehension that came with living in Lynxclan. He had felt a bit like an outsider in their ranks, too, and maybe part of him thought that moving to Ravenclan would fix all of that. Maybe he thought that he would find somewhere he belonged in Ravenclan and his problems would just go away. 

But, it’s dawning upon the tomcat that this is his life, not a story that his uncle Bumblefoot would tell him. You have to fix your own problems, and part of his problems includes getting himself out there, and getting to know his clanmates — making Ravenclan his home. He just doesn’t feel like he’s doing great at that, not yet. And that was something that Hollyhop hadn’t anticipated. Turning back because the feat of such a thing sounds so difficult is appealing, but he doesn’t have that choice. He knows that Beetlestar wouldn’t want him back in Lynxclan, and he would just be trading one problem for another. 

None of this leaves his mouth, though. Instead, he spares a glance to a worried-looking Tawnysnarl, who has her eyebrows furrowed as she scuffs her paw against the ground. “Ya okay? Ya been standin’ there staring at th’ground for a good couple a’seconds now.” He shakes his head, drops the dove, and flashes a grin. 

“Yeah, I’m okay. I was just… Thinking. Sorry. Didn’t mean to worry you.” Hollyhop genuinely explains, giving a flick of his tufted tail. Tawnysnarl eyes him up and down before shrugging her shoulders, a smile coming back to her muzzle as she sits down on her hind haunches. “Well, good. Wouldn’t wanna lose m’favorite rival ‘cause he got all sad on me.” 

“I would never get all sad, not when I’m trying to figure out what I need to beat you in next.” Hollyhop retorts smugly, flashing the calico warrior a cheeky grin. His confidence is misplaced in his abilities, and he’s very much unaware that Tawnysnarl has caught onto this fact. She grins at him, a challenging glint in her eyes. “Next? Ya haven’t even beat me once.” 

“I’ll find something.” Hollyhop responds confidently. A disbelieving snort sounds from Tawnysnarl before the pair go to work on sharing the dove that Hollyhop had gathered. His nerves feel a little less fried with Tawnysnarl’s presence, although that feeling of uncertainty and discontentment still tingles Hollyhop’s pelt in a way that makes his skin crawl. It feels like he’s on edge. 

So he tries to change the subject, and do what he’s been doing best. Distracting himself. Mouth half full of prey that he’s still in the process of chewing, Hollyhop can’t help but look out at the pretty pine trees acting as a backdrop for the falling flurries. “The snow’s pretty, you know.”