Brother no more

It was hard to admit that ones own last remaining family member was evil, and Marvek was in denial about it for quite some time. He used to have hopes for him, he hoped that his brother would get better. But his doubts had grown since they reunited. It was hard to find excuses for Kochev's behaviour these days, it was much easier when he was younger. When Kochev was but a small child, whenever he did something to hurt someone else it was clear it wasn't his idea to do that, he didn't even seem to care about what they had done to him to cause him to retaliate. It always resulted in "I don't know. The forest told me to do it". He tried to teach him to be critical about his actions back then, but these days he seemed to actively choose to do these evil deeds. He wished that Kochev only needed some guidance, a push towards the right path, but the show of sadism when he watched Erif speak to him told a different story. Kochev was lost. What was once a happy and strange child was now a sadistic and cruel monster parading around with his face.

His first doubts had come from how Kochev admitted he had chosen to forget Marvek willingly. That he had just done that without thinking twice about it, it broke his heart. But he had excused it, assuming it was a spur-of-the-moment action by a young and immature Kochev. After all, Kochev had some impulsive and reckless tendencies. It only worsened after they finally got to have a talk. He had looked tired in that deskchair of his, blood on his hands and one of those godforsaken flowers in front of him. It was disturbing to hear how much he had changed, how he spoke of the forest as family. How he occasionally dipped into speaking in plurals, as if he and the forest were one entity. Where once there was a clear seperation there was now a manipulative unity. It caused him to feel a knot in his stomach whenever he thought about it. It was even worse how Kochev seemed to clearly be trying to convince him that the forest was good, and that he was fine. He may have picked up on Marvek's pained expressions during that conversation.

It was when Erif mentioned using Kochev as a 'tool' that he hesitated. The boy was already a tool, for the forest. And he still cared about him, at least he was pretty sure he did at that moment. He didn't want to be one to choose for him, to judge if it was right or wrong, and he was very sure that if he were to speak to Kochev again he would definitely sense the dawning horror he felt when speaking to him. And so he hoped maybe, just maybe Erif being a stranger to Kochev would result in something more positive. He was very wrong about that.He didn't expect Kochev to actually be amused. It was shocking, painful to watch even. He always thought that he knew Kochev, and that what he did and what he felt was two seperate things, but again this was proven otherwise. He watched the sick grin on Kochev's face when Erif demonstrated the pain that he suffered from attempting to destroy the stone. He looked so pleased with himself, as if he had control over the situation, taunting. He wasn't some lost child taking directions from a hivemind, he was the hivemind. And he wasn't sure how much he liked that fact.

He didn't know how to deal with it, this realization that his brother couldn't be his brother anymore. How despite all of this Kochev still trusted him for some reason, possibly convinced that Marvek was equally as loyal to him. He was afraid to show that he had abandoned his hopes for him, for this monster.

It didn't help that he realized he felt indifferent to Kochev dying by someone elses blade. As long as he himself didn't have to witness it. Apparently, he didn't care for him so much after all, and that frightened him.