widom, courage, and a talk before dinner

a muted afternoon sunlight shines through the wispy clouds, tinting the edges with a soft orange. protruding through the picturesque horizon, hyrule castle’s tallest tower sits comfortably, right under the sky of cotton. 

two figures sit on the window frame, their legs dangling dangerously with no other surface to catch them. somewhere, from afar, the wind blows — and link sighs.

“so… you’ve found the one for you, right?” link asks quietly, facing the princess beside him.

nodding slowly, zelda continues, “yes. finally, after all these years.”

link joins in on the nodding, turning back to face the darkening horizons. “she’s a good one. i’m happy for you.”

zelda mutters a quiet “thanks,” and ends the short-lived conversation.

but even with years of friendship under the duo’s belt, for the first time ever, there’s no more words to exchange.

watching link’s face carefully, zelda traces her vision up and down through her friend.

“you seem troubled. what’s wrong?”

link’s lip curls into a sardonic sneer. “was my acting not good enough?” although his face displays a bitter scorn, zelda can clearly see an aching within. “i did all i could to make sure you wouldn’t notice.”

so there is something bothering him.

“what makes you think i won’t see through that little head of yours?” zelda huffs, crossing her arms. “i’ve known you for eight years. out of everyone, i’m the least likely to brush past it.”

“guess i shouldn’t have underestimated you, princess.” link groans, placing his face in his palms. “do you really want to know?”

“what kind of friend would i be if i didn’t? tell me everything.”

“alright, do you remember when i said that if i met the right one, i’d marry her on the spot?” link says, leaning backwards through the window. 

“didn’t you say that a lot of times?” zelda laughs, leaning back along with him to meet the hero’s dull, blue eyes. “because i do definitely remember.”

“good. because if you haven’t guessed yet…” link leans all the way back, allowing both his feet and hair to hang over the edge of the windowsill on opposite sides. “i did meet her.”

“well, i can see that… you probably didn’t marry her.” zelda swings her legs over the ledge and hops into the room, crouching down beside link. “if you don’t mind me asking… what happened?”

link closes his eyes. “i killed her.”

…what?

“i killed her and all of her people, all for my stupid fucking quest.” link is laughing now, but the voice holds no humor — only a bitter resentment directed towards none other than himself. 

zelda swears she sees a droplet of water fall from the side of his face, but link pulls his hat over his eyes within a second, preventing her from taking a better look at him. 

“i’m a pathetic excuse of a hero, aren’t i? i don’t get why people praise me.”

“link…” zelda cuts in quietly. “i’m sure that’s not what happened. tell me from the start. what did you do in the months you were gone?”

“you’re sure persistent.” link’s previously calm voice now wavers ever so slightly. though he tries his best to maintain the irritated tone, zelda recognizes that he is close to cracking. “are you not fazed by the fact that i confessed to killing a whole village?” he sinks down from the window ledge and onto the floor beside it, curling up into a ball.

“no, because i know that’s not you.” zelda places her hand on top of his head gently yet with assertiveness, letting link know that she’s not messing around.  “now, what was the quest you talked about?”

“i hate that about you.” link can no longer retain his composure as he forces out a rough laugh to mask the incoming tears. “anyone else would have just called me a monster and kicked me out. do you know how people out there would kill to get this shit on me? there’s more people who hate me than love me at this point.” the carpet beneath his face has now been completely soaked through. 

both of them bask in the convoluted silence. zelda knows link doesn’t actually hate her, but she agrees with the feeling of being watched and people waiting to witness a mess up all to well. she runs her hand silently through link’s hair, allowing him to calm down before continuing.

“her name was marin,” link finally says after taking a deep breath. “and our goal was to wake up this magical being called the wind fish.”

zelda nods.

“i just realized i never apologized properly.” link now pushes himself up from the ground, sitting upright. he lifts zelda’s hand off his head and holds onto it instead. “you know, for just leaving without much of a notice. i actually left hyrule to train in different countries. it was just impossible to enjoy the peace.”

“it’s okay; i understand how you feel,” zelda assures, readjusting her position to sit closer. “i was certain you’d come back, anyway.”

“you know, i was actually planning on just staying there at one point.”

“where is the ‘there’ you speak of?”

“koholint island. i ended up shipwrecking there while i was sailing back to hyrule.”

“how is it like there?”

the tiniest smile grows from link’s face. he sniffles, wiping off the remaining tears from his cheek. “it was quite the dream, to say the least.

"when i first got there, everything was so… different. for one, nobody on the island knew who i was. i wasn’t ‘the legendary hero’ to them — i was just that kid who appeared on the shores. it felt like a weight i never knew i had being lifted off my back.”

“did you feel more free with them?”

“more than just free. i felt like myself, the way like i do when i’m with you,” link judges zelda playfully with his elbow. “there were no expectations for me. the villagers didn’t even seem to mind that i was on a quest involving them, except… for her.”

“marin?”

link nods. “she cared about my progress. every evening she’d ask how my day went and actually bothered to make a genuine conversation. i haven’t had one of those — ever!”

“are you saying our conversations weren’t genuine?” zelda rolls her eyes, elbowing him back. “i am incredibly hurt.”

“you’re basically my sister. it’s against the law to have genuine conversations with your sibling.”

“are we not having one now?”

a real laugh now falls out of link’s mouth. “guess i’m a criminal, then.”

“i’ll excuse you just this time. continue, please.”

“whatever you say, princess,”  link teases. “still, with marin, i felt like i finally found somebody else who cared about me.”

“don’t leave me wondering! how is this girl like?” 

“she’s… a lot like you, actually.” link turns to zelda, meeting her eyes. “very lively, kind, has a beautiful singing voice, and honestly? also kind of a sadist. not to mention that she made fun of my height.” 

zelda grins. “i like her.”

“i think she would have liked you as well, if i ever did get to take her to hyrule. she seemed interested in the stories i told of you.” 

link now stares at the ground, frown returning to his face. “i guess i should tell you what really happened, huh?”

of course, zelda pushes him on to do so, only if he’s ready to. “you can keep it until you’re ready, whenever that is. just please — don’t hold it in your heart. it will only cause suffering if you bottle it up inside of you.”

“it would be best to tell you right now, since we’re here anyway, right?” link shrugs, a nervous laugh escaping from his mouth. “there’s really nothing left to hide from you.”

slumping down against the wall, link fiddles with his hair, recollecting the past few months on koholint island. 

“that quest… waking up the wind fish. i had to collect eight instruments hidden around the island to play it a melody which would help it awaken and be rid of all the nightmares plaguing the island. as long as it stays asleep, nobody can leave.

"i assumed that waking the wind fish from its dream would mean that the nightmares would be gone,” link’s hands crawl up to the sides of his head again, digging into the sides of his hair. “i…” his voice chokes up. “i didn’t think the entire island was a part of the dream… and its residents would disappear with it as well.”

“that does not mean you killed them,” zelda interjects, firmly grasping link’s wrist and lifting it from his head to prevent further injury. “you said it yourself: you didn’t know what would happen, and you were only doing it to help.”

“but i still could have done something else!” link continues on, pulling his hand away from the grip. “i could have just left the fish alone and let everybody else live, couldn’t i?”

“i know you’re exhausted from constantly making sacrifices, but i think you did the right thing,” zelda shuffles over, moving to a position where she can directly face link. he averts his eyes away from her, but zelda takes both of his hands into hers and holds them between the two of them. “to my understanding, if the wind fish kept sleeping, the nightmares would continue to rampage and destroy more of the island. perhaps, they would even endanger the residents eventually.”

link opens his mouth to protest, but zelda cuts him off. “you think that you can just fight them off, but won’t that just mean you’re adopting the role of a hero again? you’ll be tiring yourself out and repeating the same life on koholint as you have on hyrule.”

once link’s eyes widen, zelda knows she’s hit something important. 

“though the possibilities are slim, there is always a chance for even the most skilled warrior to fall,” she continues to reason. “and what will the village do, then? if the monsters get to them, then they will suffer a worse fate than just disappearing.”

inhaling deeply, link lowers his head in defeat. “you’re right. it was selfish of me to just think i could do things my way. if i had just let the issue continue, it would have taken both the lives of the residents and the wind fish… maybe even myself included. but really, i just wish i got to say goodbye to them before it all happened.”

zelda looks out the window to the now darkening skies. “i still don’t think you killed them. in a way, i believe they are still out there, within the wind fish. and i think marin would definitely think you made the right choice.”

“damn,” link chuckles. “they don’t call you the bearer of wisdom for nothing, huh?”

“don’t underestimate me and my carefully stacked triangles!” zelda exclaims, holding up her triforce hand. “we all know i’m the brains of the duo.”

“are you calling me stupid?”

“and what if i am?”

“whatever. fair enough.”

“still,” zelda lowers her hand, placing it on link’s shoulder. “do not blame yourself for it. in the end, you did what you were asked, and the results of what you were not aware of shouldn’t determine you.” 

“thanks, zelda.” link opens his arms and pulls the princess into a hug. “i’m sorry i was so rude to you. it’ll still probably take some time before i get over it, but trust me, this really did help.”

“the passage of time is a cruel one, but it can be generous if you take advantage of the opportunities it gives you. as long as there is an end you wish to reach, there is no doubt you will recover.”

“okay, you can stop dropping all this philosophical shit on me now,” link rolls his eyes with a grin. “i’m hungry.”

“the chefs are preparing a dinner with the guest,” zelda mentions, pointing to the door. “do you want to enact the final test on her during this time?”

ah, yes, the infamous “shut up” test. link pushes aside his demons just for the time being, since nothing is more important than bullying suitors.

after the talk with zelda, link feels a tremendous weight lifted off his chest. link fears for the next time where he is alone with his thoughts again, and shakes his head trying to rid the thought.

whatever. he can worry about that later. it’s dinnertime now, and the only sad faces on the table should be those of rejected suitors.