Sleep

It wasn’t uncommon. Not anymore anyway. Nightmares came and went, but they never seemed to get any better. It’s what she got, Hisayo though, for her past miss dealings . Her  selfish mistakes and disdains for others based on her own selfish feelings. Flashes of darkness and fears. Remembrance of her shadows. The worst had been that she remembered. She was cursed to remember when so many others forgot. Such power had never been anything she wanted and how she had been punished for it so long after. She was undeserving of it, and it made sure she knew. The more desperately she reached for the light, the more her shadow consumed. She was stuck those nights, wondering what life might have been like if she had never made her mistakes. If she had never died.

This time, though, it had been different. It wasn’t a flash only to wake up to more darkness. So many times had she counted the realization that dreams were simply dreams, only to feel the fear creep back into her at the silence of stones surrounding her. Yet now, this time, there was no awakening with a start, but rather with comfort and calmness. There was, to her, a light ever so soft in such darkness. She had almost forgotten he had come in on her, so many hours ago, hearing her fears she had once tried so hard to keep hidden. Sleep was a vulnerable state, betraying her efforts. Even with her efforts, however, he had known. Yusei always had a way of knowing, somehow, when people needed his help the most. She was no different. Harsh stirring and a desperate gasp was all it had taken to get his sudden attention, even from elsewhere. Or perhaps the connection they shared? Either way, he knew. He knew enough that no words needed be spoken. She woke to him there, but neither spoke a word. Rather a gentle smile to dry her ignorant tears as he sat on the floor at her bedside, hand firmly grasped to one another. She hadn’t even remembered falling asleep. And she couldn’t help wondering how long he had been there. A strange feeling crept to her lips as she looked into his sleeping. Calm, collected, secure. She felt as he looked as the unknowing smile painted her face, her hand giving his s gentle further squeeze as she looked on at him. 

Indeed, she wondered what life might have been like if she had never made those mistakes. But in moments like this, she remembers that, even as painful as before was, she wouldn’t trade a moment of it if it meant she would lose this future.