What A Year To Be Alive
It's time to see how the year of 2021 takes us, one can only hope it's better than the last, and some would only say that'd be jinxing us. To Faye? They could hardly care, all they want to do is get by and stay alive.
January 1st, Friday, 2021
Happy New Years.
Though, Faye can't lie, they aren't exactly "happy". Right now it's midnight, and they're standing outside in the dark and the cold, staring up at the sky as firework after firework goes off. They've been going off the past hour, people too excited to wait till it's time, but now it's just one after the other, lights exploding in the sky with a loud bang, some close by and some far away. Watching these, it's usually with family, and you usually feel happy, but neither apply to Faye right now. Their mom is inside their house asleep, and so is their sister. Why aren't they asleep? Well, for starters they find it difficult to sleep at night, so that doesn't help anything in the long run. But they just decided to stay up and outside tonight, see some of the fireworks the neighbors decided to shoot tonight. They were hoping they'd feel something looking at all the pretty colors, but they just feel... Nothing. Cold. Tired. It's been a long time since they went out with family to celebrate any kind of holiday, so they don't remember the feelings of excitement they used to get being around others they loved.
Faye sighs, shivering as the air only gets colder. They hadn't worn a jacket, and it was freezing. They wish they grabbed one now, but they can't bring themself to move their legs to go back inside. Not right now. They continue staring into the sky, thinking... Well, who knows what they were thinking, too many things that’s for sure. Too many. with a sigh, Faye finally turns away from the sky, looking around. There’s not much to say about this little area they live in. It’s a decent apartment complex, not much going on with it. Could have a better view, but otherwise Faye has grown to quite like it around here. It’s become a comfort, a constant, a safety to be around. They know the ins and outs of around the small area, and they like to keep it that way, keep it to the small area and avoid expanding into unknown territory.
A harsh breeze goes by reminding Faye of their current situation, and they decide to finally go inside and warm up, they feel like they felt someone looking at them as they enter their house, but they decide its probably just them being overly nervous since it is so late at night. Isn’t uncommon for the anxiety to be worse around this time. They’re careful when going back to their own bedroom, not wanting to wake anybody up or cause their sister to be grouchy and get in trouble over that. It doesn’t take long to cross the hall and into their own bedroom, going in they turn on the light and look around. Their bedroom is... Messy, to put it lightly. It’s not organized anymore, it’s not even chaotically organized, it’s just a straight up mess. Faye swears they’re going to clean it up eventually.
....
Eventually. Only god knows when that’ll be. They haven’t been so well recently, haven’t been taking their medication, which they know they should but they just haven’t been able to... To bring themselves to, basically. they feel a bit pathetic that something like that is such a struggle, but they can’t really do much about it besides just sucking it up and taking them. Maybe today they’ll start again, maybe... Faye gets into bed, and after who knows how long it takes, they finally drift off to sleep. To a land that’s much better than the conscious, somewhere where there‘s no worries, no troubles, no hardship, only imagination. Sadly, tonight Faye wakes up in the morning with not much recollection of their dreams last night, but that’s okay, they can write about something else instead.
writing is something Faye did a lot, and something Faye had wanted to start doing for a very long time now. So they decided, for the New Years, their resolution would be to write something in their notebook every single day for an entire year, and they’d start in the morning and at night.
January 1st, Friday, 2021 5:23am So, I’ve decided to try writing daily for a whole year. How’s this going to turn out? No idea. Will this even work out? Probably not. But hey, I guess it’s worth giving a try, right? I’m not even sure what I’m going to write for any of these, I guess how my day is going or something? Uh, I’ll just start this one off with this awkward starting point, woo or something. Wow I really hope I never show this to anybody, it’s going to be a mess at the very LEAST I can tell already. Anyways, the day just started, so I guess it’s time to start it, like I have anything to do today anyways.
With a sigh, Faye closes the book off with that starting point. Oh boy, an entire year? As much as they wanna try sticking to this, they don’t know how well they’ll do, they’ll just have to see. Hopefully this year isn’t as shit as the last, but they're already scared of jinxing it. How are they even going to start off their day? Maybe they could go get something to eat? They don’t have school today, since it’s still winter break and all that shit. Uhhhh.... I guess it’s food and find the cat it is. Faye leaves his room and goes to the kitchen, nobody is in it as it’s still fairly early. Grabbing a box of cereal and a bowl, he pours some into it and calls it good. Who needs milk when you can have... Well uh, no milk I guess.
It’s pretty good cereal. I mean, it's just regular cereal so there's nothing special or bad about it. Oh god this is going to be a boring ass day. What can he do? I mean... He should take his medication but... Maybe another day. Sleep? He doesn't really want to spend the entire day sleeping, not this one. Maybe he can go find his switch and play some games on that. Faye decides on that, going back to his room and hopping onto his switch, playing some games on it for a good while. It's really fun, he loves his switch and he's forever grateful for getting it for Christmas. His favorite game is Animal Crossing, Hollow Knight and Undertale are close up there though. Checking the time, it's only 4pm. Should he go to sleep Now? Maybe, he could sleep till like, I don't know, midnight? 2am? It all really depends doesn't it.
Faye doesn't like how... Empty his life pretty much is. How is he going to write daily like this? I mean, seriously? It's ridiculous. But there's not much he can do, not like he has friends ort anything. Maybe he can try making some? God how do people do that? He'll have to figure that out at a future date, right now, the fucker is tired as hell. Yes, it's only 4, but in this house time doesn't exist. So with that, he curls up in bed, shuts his eyes, and lays there till he passes the fuck out.