To Honor You

Her breath came heavy, chest rising and falling quickly as her body worked to calm her racing heart, but a grin spread across her face as her sparring partner smiled at her. “You have great talent, Pythanria I look forward to seeing how you fight on the battlefield.” The young phoenix woman's eyes brightened at the praise from her superior. “Thank you commander! I'll make you proud I promise.” Giggling softly as the man patted her lightly on the head and turned to leave, Pyria quickly moved to get water from the jug that had been left nearby, she was parched from the long sparring session, however it appeared to be empty. “Aw, sorry,” a voice that pierced the air with a mocking and babying tone came from nearby, “did we drink all the water? That's too bad. I guess you'll have to go get more.” Pyria's jade eyes landed on the speaker- a woman a few years older then the phoenix shifter, dark brown hair and brown eyes to match, she was rather unimpressive and average, not just in appearance but in skill as well, which was perhaps the reason she liked to pick on Pyria specifically.

Waving her hand dismissively, Pyria set down the cup and jug she had been holding before casually folding her arms behind her back. “Oh, that's alright... I can get some water inside. Um! I'd actually wanted to ask if you and the other girls were hanging out at dinner tonight, and if I could join you?” Pyria had never been close with the other women that were left at the capital, but kill them with kindness her father said, insisting that it was only because they didn't know her they treated her this way. “What? Little Pythanria, commanders favorite, wants to spend time with us? Why would you want to do that? I'm sure you have plenty of friends to spend dinner with. Go hang out with them.” With a dismissive and mocking wave of her hand, the other woman turned and walked away. Pyria sighed, casting her eyes downward, her own friends had already been sent to the front lines, while she herself had been held back for more in depth training. It wasn't a bad thing, Pyria was indeed considered a prodigy, her rare linage and natural ability with fire lending her great skill in battle, but honestly she would have preferred to have been the level of the others- to of gotten the chance to go with at least one of her friends, but instead she was alone. It was a solemn thought, one that the usually chipper girl tried to avoid at all costs, whenever possible.

Pushing the feeling of loneliness that crept into her heart away with a shake of her head, Pyria made her way back into the castle. She was lucky she got to live at the castle with so many others, lucky that she was safe here, away from the combat and death in the front lines, it didn't do to her any good to wish she was there when she was living such a good life here, now. The castle was a wonderful place to live, it was bustling with life between the staff and the warriors, healers and other workers that lived there, including the royal family of Islia. Pyria had met a couple of the princes and princesses once or twice, but they were brief meetings- she was just another trainee after all, nothing special when it came down to it. Just another pawn among many skilled hands.

After downing several glasses of water and getting herself cleaned up and into a fresh tunic, one as typical and drab as all of the tunics she wore, Pyria made her way to the mess hall for dinner, lining up as usual to grab her meal from the kitchen staff as she passed. Dinner was always good at the castle, even if the other meals were not as impressive, it always seemed like they went all out for the last meal of the day. With her food in handle, Pyria moved to take an empty seat at a random table, a slight sigh escaping her as she began to eat. Her eyes wandered the hall, stopping at each table as she watched the various people converse and have a good time, everyone seemed to be enjoying the conversation, each others company and the relief of another day coming to an end. The men at her table ignored her, as was normal, they talked and laughed and joked with one another, acting as though she wasn't even there. When talking with others, Pyria often came across as open, friendly and outgoing, but unfortunately the way the others always seemed to think of her weighed on her ability to start conversation so casually. When she was training it was easy to talk to the others, it was easy to prompt a conversation about sparring or find something related to talk about, but in a casual setting, they turned a cold shoulder to her; the special one, the one that was above them, the strong one. Men were intimidated and women were jealous. Men flirted with her for fun, to say they could, and women teased and taunted her, trying to drag her down to their level. She hated it, she hated being 'special'.

It was half way through her meal that something caught her attention- someone she knew to be from the medical ward came rushing into the room, moving to talk to several of the unit commanders that sat together at a table- after a moment of discussion, every one of them stood and left the room in a hurry. Curiosity overwhelming her, Pyria stood from her table and slipped out of the room after them. Though she hadn't seen where they'd gone, judging from the presence of the healer, she had an idea of where they were headed. Sure enough, Pyria found the medical wing in a panic when she arrived, medics were rushing all over the place, and a trail of blood lead through the door and to one of the beds in the room. “Please, everyone calm yourselves... There's nothing you can do. She's already gone.” A voice spoke above the panic and Pyria furrowed her brows in concern, slipping closer until she could see the bed in question, her eyes falling on the figure laying there. Immediately her blood ran cold. The sheets and the warriors clothes were soaked with blood, an arrow piercing through the chest of the woman that laid there, her deep crimson hair almost matched the blood that continued to seep into the sheets.

“Rhea...?” Pyria's voice escaped her barely above a whisper, she recognized the woman, but she didn't want to believe it to be true. Her idol, the woman that Pyria had looked up to since her young days, the woman she had watched train, had seen praised every step of the way, regarded as one of the strongest women in Islia and Zelea put together. Rhea Lekas was the woman she had silently used as her inspiration, that she had admired from afar for her entire life as a trainee, the woman she aspired to someday stand beside in battle. Now she was laying there, drenched in her own blood- “There's nothing you can do. She's already gone.” The words of the healer echoed in Pyria's mind and she felt her breath hitch in her throat. “Rhea!” Pyria's sudden and unintentional outburst made the others in the room start and as the young phoenix shifter attempted to push past the others to get to the bed, a strong arm caught her around the middle, winding her instantly. “Wait!” She tried to argue and struggle, but the other figure quickly dragged her back towards the door to the medical wing. “I'm sorry, friends and family of the departed only. I'm afraid you must leave.” Pyria's eyes wouldn't leave the bed to see who the man was that was forcibly removing her from the room, but Pyria was too petrified to struggle much more, to horrified to resist. Her heart didn't want to believe this to be the truth.

 Before Pyria could fully grasp what was happening, she was standing outside of the medical wing, the door closed in front of her, her entry barred. She felt her shock and horror slowly giving away to grief and her legs gave out from under her, dropping her to her knees. The woman she had admired so much, the woman they had called invincible, taken out by a single, well aimed arrow. It couldn't be true, it had to be someone else... it had to be... she didn't want to believe it. She couldn't. But she knew, there was no denying what she saw, who she saw, laying there in a pool of her own blood.

 Tears flowed unwillingly from her eyes, dripping from her chin and nose onto the stone before her as she lowered her forehead to the ground, her sobs getting caught in her throat as she tried to hold them back, each one containing her sorrow, pain and regret. Regret that she had been too timid to approach her, regret that she had never taken the time to get to know her, regret that she had only spoken to her once or twice... all the things she would never get to say to her, all the things she had wanted a chance to do, but she had let slip through her fingers... all at once the dam holding back her emotions broke and Pyria let out a wail of despair, her arms folding around her stomach as she cried deeply and heavily, her breath coming in gasps as she sobbed, the emotion and agony that stabbed and twisted her heart saturating each pained cry.

She wasn't sure how long she was there for, kneeling on the ground before the medical wing, her forehead pressed to the cold stone floor as her tears stained it below her. Her sobs had quieted but were just as full of her misery. “Pythanria, stand up.” A low, male voice rumbled through the air, startling the young phoenix shifter into a kneeling position, her back straight as her tearful eyes met the figure of her father- or at least she assumed it was him based on his voice, as she could hardly see through her tears- “Death is a natural part of war. It's unbecoming of a strong woman to cry in such a manner.” A sudden strong grip on her arm had him hoisting her unwillingly to her feet. “B-but father...” She started to speak, hiccuping as another sob caught in her throat and she flinched away from his touch as he attempted to roughly wipe away her tears. “People are bound to die in this war. You must get used to seeing the dead if you plan to stand at the front lines. The battlefield will be littered with it it and you will be expected to fight over the dead bodies of your comrades, perhaps even use them for your own survival at times.” His voice was scolding and harsh and it made her shrink back, pulling away from him.

Her timidness only lasted a moment, however, before it was replaced with anger. “You don't understand, father! She- she wasn't just some warrior! She was incredible and-” Her voice caught in her throat and her teeth ground together, she didn't want to cry anymore, but the pain hadn't subsided. “Of course she was, many of them are, but death awaits us all on the battlefield. You cannot just cry over the dead.” Pyria balled her hands into fists as he continued to scold her, didn't he understand? Didn't he have any idea? “Didn't you shed tears when mother died?! You can't tell me you never cared- don't tell me you didn't cry over her!” She snapped, fresh tears slipping from her eyes in frustration and pain, how could he talk that way? “Pythanria, that's completely a different situation, you don't understand-” “No, you don't understand! You don't listen, she- she was-” Pyria cut herself off with a sob, a hand moving to cover her mouth while the other shoved away the hand of her father as he attempted to reach out to touch her. “No! Leave me alone, father. Let me be!” Her voice broke as she yelled, it was hoarse and rough, worn out from crying so deeply.

 Before her father was able to say anything else, Pyria was running down the hall and away from the medical wing. She didn't know where she was headed, she couldn't even see where she was going through her tears as they began to flow freely again. She could hear the vague sounds of people as she shoved past them, both complaints and concern, but she didn't stop, she couldn't, not until she was out of the castle did she stop, when the fresh, crisp air hit her face, then and only then did she slow her pace and give herself a moment to gasp for breath. Hands moving to wipe her cheeks clean, Pyria sniffled, rubbing away fresh tears from her eyes. She didn't care if her father would punish her later, she didn't care what those that she passed thought, if they worried. All she could see, all she could think about, was Rhea's lifeless body laying there in her own blood.

 Running her fingers roughly through her hair, Pyria paced, not sure what to do with herself. She felt so lost, so broken. Her inspiration, her strength, the woman she looked to when she was having a difficult time with her training, she was gone... Pyria's wings materialized as she shifted to her half form, the large red and gold limbs spreading as she pushed herself off the ground and into the air. The wind dried her tears almost instantly as she flew higher, high above the gardens, towards the tops of the castle towers. The feeling of freedom brought peace to her heart for a moment- as she flew, she closed her eyes, enjoying the feeling of weightlessness, her wings beating slowly, only enough to keep her off the ground. It cleared her head to fly, but it didn't bring her any closer to an answer.

 Coming to land on the roof of the castle, Pyria took a deep breath, looking out over the beautiful view before her, the red and golden leaves of the forest that stayed in a permanent state of autumn shimmering in the evening light as the sun cast a golden glow over the landscape. It was beautiful, but it just pained her to see, knowing that Rhea would never see a view like this ever again. Why did it have to be her? Why couldn't it have been someone else?

 -

 The next week or so passed by like a blur. Pyria felt broken and tired, no one understood how she could be upset over Rhea's death- she was not her family, she had not even been a friend of the deceased- they didn't understand. They ridiculed the young phoenix shifter when she skipped training because she felt too ill to get out of bed, they scolded her for not being at her best and they lectured her that she should get used to losing others on the battlefield. There was no sympathy for her heartache, no compassion for her pain and Pyria wished for nothing more then to see her best friend again, she needed her more then ever in those days, but Amariel was on the front lines, fighting for her own life, too busy to be babysitting the silly, depressed girl that Pyria had become. No, Pyria was alone to deal with her pain, even her father, as cruel and rude as he was about the situation, had been shipped back off to battle the day after the banquet, a banquet that had been arranged to honor Rhea and her service to the kingdom of Islia. She had no one to comfort her.

 No one but herself.

She was standing in the bathroom late in the morning, staring at herself in the mirror, when a thought crossed her mind that began to change everything. 'What are you doing?' She was almost startled by the sudden words in her mind, but she frowned. 'Is this really what she would have wanted? She was an incredible, strong woman. If she was going to die... she would have wanted it to be in battle. Didn't she say that once? If she was going to die, she wanted it to be protecting her kingdom... that's what she said.' Pyria's brows furrowed as she stared at her reflection in the mirror, her hair a mess after spending several days locked up in her room. 'Would she really want you here, moping around, not leaving your room or eating, just because she passed the way she would have wanted it?' Pyria felt something stirring inside of her, a fire that had been snuffed out in her pain, a passion that had been subdued by misery. “No. That's not what she would have wanted.” She admitted out loud, the ache in her heart that had become an unpleasant friend was lifting suddenly, as though she had just turned on the light to frighten it away. The light of her realization of what she was doing to herself. 'I'm ruining myself for what?I'm neglecting my training for why? This is the opposite of what she would have wanted... she always encouraged the trainees to try their hardest. To defend the kingdom. To stand for what they believed in.'

As she reminded herself of what Rhea had stood for, Pyria was stripping off her old clothes and running the water for a bath, it was time to drag herself out of this hole she had buried herself in. 'I don't have to mourn her anymore. But perhaps... perhaps I can honor her. Honor her by being the best warrior that I can be.'

 It was time to make some changes.

 The first found Pyria a tailors shop. She made a fair amount of rali- the currency of the world of Aendora- during her training for the army, rali she didn't use for anything in particular, at least until now. If she was going to make changes, her wardrobe was a first step, it was time to get out of the drab tunics she was accustom to wearing, but it would require custom tailoring, a lot of it. The outfit she wanted was not of Aendora, so it would take some time to make. In the meantime, Pyria knew she had to get back into shape. She had spent more then a week and a half without pushing herself in training, an amount of time that could be detrimental for a trainee, but with her passion and drive back, she hit the training field full force. The motivation of doing her best in Rhea's memory pushing her forward.

 It took almost another week before Pyria felt ready, ready to face the others again. She had been training on her own, in off times, training herself back up to where she had been, pushing herself to reach the level she had been at previously. She knew if she faced her commanders at a sub-par level, they would question if she was ready to continue her training, to go to the front lines, and she couldn't afford that. Not now, not anymore.

 -

 Taking a deep breath, Pyria stared at the outfit laid out before her on her bed, it was different, it was new, but it was perfect. It was exactly what she wanted. It wasn't an exact copy of what Rhea once wore, but the inspiration and suggestions she took to the tailors had come through. It wasn't like anything she had seen before in Aendora. Grabbing the outfit, Pyria pulled it on one piece at a time, getting accustom to the fit; the bodice was tight, as it should be and the dress fell just to her thighs, long enough to cover her, but not too long as to restrict her leg movements in battle. Picking up the golden sash, Pyria tied it around her waist before pulling on the fingerless gloves, adjusting the cuffs. It was obvious the outfit was made just for her- each piece fit snugly, tailored to perfection.

Slipping her feet into the sandals that laced up to her knees with leather straps and gold cuffs that matched those on her gloves, Pyria picked up the last piece of her new outfit- a golden woven tiara. This piece hadn't been made by the tailors, this piece she had, had made at the blacksmith. The strings of gold were weaved together like vines, while thicker pieces resembled leaves. It was similar the the headpiece that Rhea wore- extremely similar. It was the one piece of the outfit she couldn't bare to change too heavily. Tilting the headpiece to get a better look, the gold shimmered in the morning light peeking through the window and Pyria swallowed a ping of guilt- it almost felt wrong to wear it. Almost. Taking a deep breath, Pyria stepped into the bathroom to look at herself in the mirror. The gold of her sash, top and cuffs matched the lighter streak in her hair almost exactly and the tiara was the perfect compliment. Taking another breath in, the young phoenix girl carefully slipped the headpiece onto her head, adjusting her hair slightly before taking another look at herself. It completed the outfit, every piece complimenting each other, blending together to form her new look.

There was only one thing left to do. One thing she had left to take care of.

It was a beautiful day, ideal for training outside in the courtyards and as she expected, the training area was bustling and busy as ever. Smiling to herself, Pyria picked up her sword and shield that she had fetched from the armory before warming up and stepped out into the training field. As she crossed the worn dirt field, the other pairs that were sparring paused, she could hear them murmuring and whispering to one another, her new outfit and confidence drawing the attention of her peers. Tightening her grip on her sword, Pyria came to a stop only when she reached her commander, who had paused his own sparring match when her appearance was noted. “Pythanria, have you finally decided to continue with your training? I was beginning to think you had given up.” Though his words were taunting, there was a hint of amusement and pride in his voice, it was clear he was happy to see that he had been wrong in this assumption. Pyria just grinned at him. “Never. I just needed to work some things out.”

Watching as her commander waved off the other trainee he had been sparring with, Pyria smiled as he raised his sword and took his stance. Generally they sparred with only training weapons, but the phoenix shifter knew her commander could more then handle her at her best. “Very well, then. Let's see if that new outfit of yours gives you some more confidence on the battlefield.” Pyria tightened her grip on her sword as she raised it, a smirk crossing her expression as she flipped the switch at the handle, the distinct clinking of metal reaching their ears as her sword detached itself, the space between the parts that were once the blade quickly becoming engulfed in flames as she took a fighting stance. “Don't even think about going easy on me,” she paused, a glint of teeth sparkling between her lips as she smirked wider, digging her heel into the ground as she readied herself.

 “and by the way, it's Pyria.”