Lonely Eyes

The girl stopped at the foot of the staircase and looked up into the dark landing. There it was again, hardly more than a flicker of movement at the edge of her awareness, barely even visible, but undoubtedly there. It was the fourth night in a row that she had seen it, but this was the first time she had summoned up the courage to come and investigate.

Anita Leigh was not a coward; she tried to believe that not much could make her afraid. That she could face down anything and be brave, like those heroes and heroines of legend she so liked to read about. That was what she wanted to be like; strong, bold, courageous, unflappable.

But she was afraid now.

The thing on the landing moved again and she almost missed it, its body - if she could call it a body - nearly invisible in the dim light. It flickered in and out of existence in a way that made her doubt it was really there at all. As if it were something half-seen in a dream - or a nightmare.

I should go, she thought. If there really is something up there - and there MUST be or I wouldn't have seen it - then it could be something really dreadful. Something dangerous. But what if there isn't anything there? Could I be... going mad?

The idea horrified her. Anita was a down-to-earth girl and had always prided herself on her ability to be calm and rational. She never got involved in silly games, never wasted her money, never joined her classmates on adventures in the woods. Ever since she had come to this boarding-school, her teachers had all remarked on how sensible she was. It was a reputation that Anita intended to keep. Of course, not all of the other girls liked her because of it, and many even hated her and called her a know-it-all and all sorts of unpleasant things.

But even if she was more inclined to read a book than go exploring, Anita was no coward. And tonight she was determined to prove it.

'I'm coming up the stairs!' she called out before she took hold of the handrail and started to ascend. There was no answer from the landing, making her stifle a shiver that had nothing to do with the chill in the air. It was October, but it wasn't that cold.

Her footsteps sounded unnaturally loud on the softly carpeted stairs, and it was only when she got halfway up that she realised there was no sound coming from upstairs, none at all. What was going on? All of the girls' dormitories were up here and it was barely nightfall. There should have been people talking, laughing, joking - yet it was as silent as a tomb except for the steady thump-thump of her feet. Why was that?

I should go back, she thought, but she was at the top of the stairs by then. No point in turning around now, was there? She released the handrail and felt her palms damp with sweat. It was so unexpected that it startled her; was she really that scared?

I will not leave, she thought fiercely, and walked forwards onto the dimly lit landing. The hallway in front of her looked longer and darker than usual. The spaces between where the lamps were arranged along the walls looked as black as pits.

I am not afraid.

Not realising she was holding her breath, she continued forwards, trying not to look at any of the closed doors on either side of the hallway. Most led into the girls' dormitories, but it wasn't what lay behind the doors that frightened her. It was the silence. Her footsteps were the only thing she could hear. It was as though she'd left reality and entered a new world, a darker world that she had no desire to explore.

She was almost to the end of the hallway when she heard something. A whisper of sound, as faint as a breath of wind over dead leaves. There one heartbeat and gone the next.

It scared her more than anything else because she didn't know what it was.

I will not turn back. Not now.

Her legs felt as if they'd turned to water and her mouth was dry, painfully dry. She was too scared to blink.

She was just thinking about abandoning her courage and running for the stairs when she caught the slightest flicker of movement at the very end of the hall. So subtle that most people would have brushed it off without a second thought. But Anita was full of adrenaline and fear, and it made her hyper-aware of everything around her. She refused to run now. Not before she found out what was going on.

She steeled herself and walked forwards.

When she saw it, her first thought was that one of her dorm-mates was playing a joke on her. The figure huddled in the corner was unmistakably a person. But a moment later, she realised that it wasn't anybody she recognised. It was tall, taller than any of the girls she knew, considerably taller than Anita herself. And there was something strange about it...

Mismatched eyes of green and brown turned towards her.

Anita fell back a step.

Her mind couldn't make sense of what she was seeing. She had expected something so much worse that when she finally saw what it was, she just couldn't understand. So she stupidly blurted out the first thing that came into her head.

'You're a boy!' - uttered in tones of outrage. This was an all-girls' boarding-school.

He raised himself to his feet and, to her shock, offered her a humble bow. Her eyes moved, taking in every aspect of his appearance in the dim light. He wore a white shirt, breeches, and brown jacket, simple and weathered. His hair was a little longer than she was used to seeing and tied back in a braid, loose strands framing a narrow, almost gaunt face. His left eye was green and his right eye was brown. There was something strange about his colouration, though. His hair and skin appeared almost grey in the darkness.

He moved forwards a step, and she finally saw.

All the way through him.

Vision darkening, Anita stumbled and found herself grabbing the wall for support. Everything around her was swimming and her knees wouldn't support her at all. She felt sick and dizzy. She was going to faint. She never fainted.

Just before she collapsed, a hand caught her gently by the arm, supporting her in the void. She gasped, blinked, and swallowed twice. Gradually, the feeling of nausea passed.

She looked up.

As if her almost-fainting spell had given her courage, she now found that she could look at him without fear. He really seemed quite ordinary apart from the fact that she could see the wall through his body. She shuddered, but managed to stop herself passing out again. This was one of the rare times when she wished she had the bravery and confidence of the other girls.

The boy helped her to stand upright, his movements as natural as if he did this every day. As soon as Anita was standing without his support, he moved back to a respectful distance. She thought his mismatched eyes looked sad, forlorn almost, and he stood politely with his hands clasped behind his back.

It felt like hours had passed before she found her voice.

'Who are you?'

She realised afterwards that it wasn't a very polite way to address someone, and cringed a little, but the boy didn't seem to notice.

'Is that your first question?'

She shivered. His voice was peculiar, wrong somehow. It was distorted and echoed faintly, as if two or three of him were speaking at once.

She lifted her chin, defiant even when terrified. 'Shouldn't it be?'

'Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to offend.' He gave her another small bow as if in consternation. 'It's just that most people are more worried about WHAT I am. Actually, most run away, but I see you're not like that.'

'I don't run away,' said Anita, glad now that she hadn't. 'And I can see for myself WHAT you are.' Though she still couldn't believe it. 'I want to know WHO you are.'

He cocked his head, curiosity making a spark in his forlorn expression. 'Of course. My name is William. And you?'

'Anita. Anita Leigh.' Then she shook her head vigorously. 'Why am I talking to you like... like this is normal?'

He gave her a smile, but it didn't reach his eyes, a deep and long-suppressed misery visible in their depths. How long had he been here, she suddenly thought? How long had he been alone here, roaming the hallways, talking to nobody - until tonight? What kind of an existence was that? Unbidden, she felt an unexpected pity tug at her heart along with a wave of depression.

'How long have you been here?' she whispered. 'I've never seen you.'

'Fifteen years.' Anita gasped, a hand flying to cover her mouth. 'I was cursed to haunt this place. I haven't always been here - and I'm very careful to give everyone their due privacy - my lady.'

He sounded concerned, and she knew he was thinking about how he was a boy living in a girls' boarding-school. But her mind was on a different track. 'You're a ghost,' she whispered, finally making herself say it out loud.

He offered her another elegant bow. 'At your service.'

'But that's impossible!' she blurted.

'Do you doubt what your own eyes see?' William seemed to know exactly what was going through her mind. 'Don't doubt herself,' he said, almost pleadingly. 'We're standing here together, talking. You know that I'm real. And I can promise that you're not mad or deluded, either.'

Unable to deal with the question of whether she was mad or not, Anita changed the subject. 'Can you ever leave?' she asked.

'The only way to break this curse is for a living person to - voluntarily - let me out. By their own volition, with no trickery or manipulation on my part. But everyone who I've approached to ask for help has run away, terrified. Eventually I gave up asking, and here I am now.'

Emotion tugged at her heartstrings. Confused and afraid she might be, but she couldn't help feeling pity for this strange boy. Deep down, she knew that he really was a ghost. Maybe that was why she felt so strongly for him. She could think of nothing more lonely than being forced to live on after death, with everyone so scared of you that they wouldn't look at you.

Dipping into a well of courage she didn't know existed, she reached out to take his arm. The surprise that she could touch him lasted only a moment. 'I'll free you,' she said, determined to change that loneliness she saw in him, the suppressed misery that made her chest ache.

His face held no expression, and she realised he didn't believe her. His gaze went to her hand on his sleeve, then back up to her face.

'I WILL,' she said fiercely. 'I'll break the curse. I'll let you out of here.'

Emotion flickered in the backs of his eyes. She saw a gleam of rising hope there.

'Just tell me how,' she whispered.