Jess
SparklingEntropy
- Created
- 3 years, 16 days ago
- Creator
- SparklingEntropy
- Favorites
- 5
Profile
art by @spacekraftz
"I won’t make you regret it, giving me somewhat of another chance. I promise. No matter what, I’m never leaving you again."
About
"All I can do now is be a better person. A better...friend. To prove that I won't ever do it again. There's no point in wallowing over it...or wondering what could have been...or what we could be now if nothing had happened. You have to push some things behind yourself to make the step forward not as heavy. Right?"-
Full Name
Jessamine Kidd (Maiden + Married)
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Nicknames
Jess, Jessamy, Red, Lovebird (by Lucy), Jay (by Lucy)
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Age
20+
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Gender + Pronouns
Nonbinary (Any Pronouns, mostly He/She)
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Birthday
July 13th
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Ethnicity
Scottish
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Occupation
Marine Biologist
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Sexuality
Lesbian
Perhaps known best for his playful wit and his surprisingly gentle demeanour, Jess is likely one of the most devoted and loyal people you could know, which is ironic, considering that, despite being the same way when he was younger, his first decision upon being moved across the ocean into an entirely different country was to ghost his childhood best friend and long-time crush, Lucy, too afraid of the what-ifs and the risk of never seeing her again to risk a relationship with her. This choice, which only ended up dragging his other best friend, Meredith, into the ghosting as collateral damage, proved to be the biggest mistake of his life, which, after three years of being separated from them, resulted in Jess risking everything to move back to America to find them, fully aware that he may never be able to regain the bond he had with them before, but at the very least wanting to give them the apology he felt they deserved for his actions.
Though both of his friends certainly and rightfully chewed him out for the ghosting, considering the pain it'd put them both through, they both decided to give him a chance to make up for it and to potentially regain the tight bond they'd all had as teenagers, which Jess was determined to prove tenfold. And this was easier said than done, considering in the midst of his efforts, Jess and Lucy found themselves realising that their feelings for one another never truly faded as they both thought.
Likes
- Cats
- Coffee
- Dancing
- Reptiles, specifically snakes
- Sharks
- Indie/Folk music
Dislikes
- Humid weather
- Tight clothing
- Planes
- Extremely loud sudden noises
- Beer
- Sand
Trivia
- He doesn't have a middle name. His mother never gave him one, and Jackdaw never really considered giving him one.
- His voiceclaim is Mary Read from Assassin's Creed: Black Flag.
- He has diagnosed GAD (Generalised Anxiety Disorder) and takes medication for it while also visiting a therapist bi-weekly. Beau is his emotional support animal due to this, which is partly why he can have her in his dorm.
- While in Scotland, he took classes to learn a bit of Scottish Gaelic for fun. He isn't fluent in it, but he can speak and understand it pretty well.
- His love language is more than likely acts of service, though he enjoys physical affection and gift giving as well.
- He's a Cancer, and when it comes to alignment he's Chaotic Good.
art by fuluv
Personality
Confident in himself and witty, Jess is a surprisingly honey-tongued social butterfly, which works perfectly considering, when he was a kid and getting into mischief, it helped him talk his way out of things (and pull a certain rebel friend of his out of trouble as well). He's self-assured when it comes to his image, and tends to not let anyone change that unless they're legitimately criticizing something about him. He is absolutely not afraid of speaking his mind, and will argue if he feels like it's needed without much hesitation.
Jess is rather laidback and gentle, despite what one might think of him. He cares immensely for those around him, and tries to show it as much as he can. With him being strongly family-oriented, he cherishes the bonds he makes like such by instinct, which also tends to make him protective. He isn't really sensitive, but he does have anxiety over the idea of failing anyone, especially after the ghosting incident. And...though charismatic, if one manages to take him off guard, they can reveal a rather awkward and even a bit shy person behind his charming visage, which embarasses him, but it is what it is. Her optimism and confidence can be contagious, though, and she gives solid advice when asked. He loves listening to other people talk, even if just for his job, and hearing anyone talk passionately over something they enjoy or partake in endears him more than anything else.
Jess is affectionate with those he cares for, even if at times mostly through acts of service, but also through touch as well. He's exceedingly loyal, though this can lead to him growing resentful of anyone who hurts those close to him as a consequence, and he struggles to forgive at times...and by proxy struggles to forgive himself. Jess has intensely major issues with guilt, and if he fucks up, he doesn't let it go easily as a result, which can lead to him allowing himself to be a punching bag for either himself or other people. His intelligence and craft nature tend to keep him on his feet, though if pushed over the edge he tends to surrender all of this to blind impulse, which can get him into trouble. He has a firm belief in life needing to be lived to the fullest, with how potentially short it can be, especially after spending so long shackled down by his own anxiety, and though thoughtful, doesn't ever mind taking risks or leaping into the unknown.
He has a playful yet realistic view of life, and though definitely still rebellious, he's mellowed out somewhat from his teenage years, though that absolutely does not mean he doesn't mind getting into minor mischief from time to time. He's certainly stubborn as well, but not so much in a bad way as more in a way that ensures that the people around him are well taken care of, and are not any less than okay. This, along with his family-oriented and devoted nature make him both an excellent friend, partner, and even mentor-figure, though Jess is also rather humble, so he isn't the type to brag or really think himself as such too often.
Skills
- Jess can cook solidly well on his own, having been taught how to by his father early on for the occasional nights he had to work late at his job. He's not perfect, but he's confident in the craft and does enjoy following recipes as well.
- In high school, Jess was on the swim team due to an early interest in the sport, and due to this is a strong and fast swimmer, and he's able to hold his breath underwater for a bit longer than average.
- Jess being not just a social butterfly but also rather honey-tongued makes him an excellent smooth-talker and the woman tends to know the right things to say as a result, which can help in terms of getting out of trouble or making friends.
- While he certainly has not graduated and still has a ways to go, Jess' degree path and his own personal interest in the subject has made him very good at identifying aquatic animals, reptiles, or amphibians. This might not be seen as the most useful skill...until you realise that it means he can most likely tell you if the snake you found in your backyard can kill you or not.
- Jess never took classes for it, but he's a surprisingly good dancer, something his father also happens to be. He works better with a dance partner than on his own, but either way, he's rather sure-footed.
Flaws
- Though this is far less of an issue than it was before due to him getting the help he needed for it, Jess' anxiety used to cause him to panic and either overthink a situation or go to the worst case scenario immediately. He has learned how to cope with this and takes medication for it, though he does still have his moments.
- When he fucks up, he does not forget nor let it go for a while. He holds onto guilt and tends to fall back into it easily. He believes that moving forward is the best course of action, he just...struggles to do it for a while at first.
- While typically thoughtful and not the type to rush into things, Jess loses this entirely when he's either stressed, pushed to his limit, or angry, which causes him to typically act out recklessly.
- Just like he struggles to forgive himself, he struggles to forgive people who hurt either him or his loved ones, even if his feelings are irrational.
- While perhaps not entirely a flaw due to it being great at keeping him on his desired path, Jess is stubborn, which can sometimes make it hard to change his mind when he's set his mind on something.
Hobbies
- Swimming
- Dancing, usually with someone else
- Cooking
- Being outside in general, or taking nature walks
- Spending time with friends
- Volunteering at animal shelters
Favorites
- Colour: Gold or Purple
- Music: Folk, Classic Rock, Alt, and Indie
- Food: Any kind of fish, but his favourite is salmon or haddock. He also loves crab and crawfish.
- Smells: Sweet smells, like baking cookies, pumpkin pie/spice, or caramel, but also a big fan of the smell of rain.
- Season/Holiday: Fall, his favourite holiday happens to be Christmas, but Halloween follows close behind.
- Introvert Extrovert
- Intuitive Observant
- Thinking Feeling
- Judging Prospecting
- Assertive Turbulent
Appearance
- Hair Color Red
- Eye Color Sage Green
- Skin Color Olive
- Height 5'11
- Clothing Style Soft Punk
- Skinny Large
- Curvy Flat
- Boney Muscular
- Groomed Messy
Jess stands at 5'11 and sports a lean and fit build at around 153 lbs. His skin is olive-coloured and tends to tan rather well if he's outside for long periods, his entire body absolutely covered in freckles that don't really have a set pattern or location, simply in random spots. To anyone unsuspecting, Jess can appear rather androgynous, with ambiguous features in his face and build, though the feature that most tend to look to first upon meeting him is the long, unruly mane of scarlet curls on top of his head. The sides are typically shaved to make caring for it easier, though Jess tends to let them grow out a little before getting them reshaved, so it isn't uncommon to see him sporting a slightly grown out undercut at times. He keeps his hair long otherwise, it typically falling down a bit below his shoulders unless he has it pulled up into a ponytail, which he tends to do often if trying to keep it out of his eyes. His eyes are a pretty and surprisingly warm sage green, with dark and thick brows resting above them. He has a sharp jawline, and high cheekbones, though the sharpness of his features is usually contrasted with the warm nature of his expressions or gazes.
In terms of dress, Jess tends to lean toward soft punk or even grunge aesthetics, usually opting for comfort. Flannels and bomber jackets are his thing, with the occasional leather jacket, and he's typically in torn jeans and t-shirts otherwise, if he's not wearing a sweater or button-up. All of this is topped off with occasional makeup. He doesn't always mess with it, but he loves dark or red eyeshadow, and the same goes for his taste in lipstick.
And, fitting of his main aesthetic, Jess has several piercings, with a gold septum ring, gold stud snakebites right below his lip, and several piercings in his ears from his lobes to the ones riding up his cartillage. If it isn't obvious enough, Jess loves wearing gold, and he typically has some form of it on his person any any point, whether it be a necklace or a couple rings. He is never not seen in a dog tag necklace with three tags, though, even if he often wears it under his shirt.
Design Notes
- Jess is rather expressive, tending to always have a grin or calm expression on his face. He's prone to smirks at times, that or mischevous grins. His brows are his main tell, and are rather expressive in their own right.
- Jess has a sleeve tattoo of a snake on his right arm, the reptile curled around a snake and flowers. He has a small, simple anchor tattoo on his left wrist as a nod to his father. He's itching to get more, however.
- His hair is CURLY and typically wild, though surprisingly soft in texture. He often puts product in it (whether leave-in conditioner or gel) to keep it tamed, though it does become rather frizzy in humid weather. It tends to get in his eyes.
- He has no preference for clothing, Jess will wear masculine or feminine wear without complaint, whether it be suits, dresses, skirts, etc.
- He paints his nails (usually black, but he never minds changing it up), though tends to keep them short rather than long.
Relationships
Lucy and Jess have known each other since they were kids, the two having lived across the street from each other. The two have been close practically since the day they met, typically always seen at the other's side, especially considering Jess often had Lucy over for sleepovers or otherwise, to the point where his father was practically used to her being over. And, of course, as time progressed and as they grew up, Jess at some point began to unknowingly fall absolutely head-over-heels for her, though he struggled to realise this until he was a portion into high school, considering how close their bond already was. Lucy had also grown romantic feelings for him, not that Jess was entirely aware despite the obviousness of their feelings to everyone around them, though before he could properly act on his, he found out that his father was moving them both across the world, and, anxious over the concept of trapping Lucy in a relationship where she'd be stuck waiting for someone who might never be able to see her again, he cut contact with her sometime into the move out of seemingly nowhere and he didn't speak to her again for an achingly long three years. He felt it to be the right decision at the time, which only proved to bite him in the ass later when he realised that it was absolutely not the right decision in the slightest. The only solution he felt right was to move back to America in his second year of college to find her again and to properly apologise, even if she never forgave him. Jess had never really gotten over Lucy in the slightest, though, and with Lucy deciding to let him back in, the two rekindling caused them to come back and hit him full force, and Jess finally managed to admit them with a new sense of confidence. The two work well together, and Jess absolutely adores Lucy with everything in his being, and is enamoured with every little thing about her, eager to make this clear in his words and affection if given the chance. He is utterly and completely devoted to her, just as he's been since they were kids.
Jess met Meredith soon after she and Lucy became friends, the two striking up a similar close friendship rather quickly, especially considering that, at the point in Jess' life that they'd met, Jess was becoming somewhat of a rebel himself, which fell in line with Meredith's trouble-causing tendencies perfectly. Jess, of course, did tend to be the one to think before doing in their little duo, which would cause him to typically try getting them both out of trouble if they fell too deep into it, but the two were otherwise partners in crime, and it hurt Jess terribly to leave Meredith behind along with Lucy when he moved and eventually cut them both off. Jess intended to apologise to Meredith in person as well as Lucy when he returned, and did so, willingly allowing Meredith to grill her for abandoning them both considering he...did do that, and her anger was deserved. Despite that, the two rekindled quick, even if Jess' budding relationship with Lucy did make things awkward between them for a bit due to Meredith's jealousy over it. Nevertheless, the two are ride-or-dies, and Jess loves her like family, and will always appreciate her being in his life.
Jess met Journey after moving back to America, and he was the first friend Jess made prior to rekindling with Lucy and Mer, the two having bumped into one another while Journey was working. The two grew closer quickly, with Journey's supportive nature and kindness helping Jess feel a bit more at home in a place he'd been away from for years. He typically seeks the other out for advice and spends time with him whenever he can.
Jackdaw raised Jess on his own for the entirety of his life, and that alone is something Jess cannot help but admire and appreciate him for. The two are close due to this as well. and Jess typically falls onto his father for advice if he genuinely needs help. His devoted, loving, and generous nature is something Jess looks up to, that and his supportive nature, considering Jackdaw helped Jess get back to America when Jess decided to go back for Lucy. Jackdaw is, quite frankly, everything Jess would want to be as a parent, and the two talk often, especially due to Jess being a country away from him now.
Lovingly nicknamed Beau for short similar to Jess' own nickname, Jess found Beau as a kitten back in Scotland, abandoned in a field near his neighbourhood. He took it upon himself to raise the kitten, and the two have been inseperable since, with Jess registering Beau as his ESA sometime before he moved after she'd grown up a bit. Beau came with him when he moved, even if Jess felt somewhat guilty to keep her in a small dorm, and she's a massive source of comfort and support for Jess, even if he tends to playfully insult her and her antics to play off how much he truly and genuinely cares for her.
Story
Born as an accident as a result of a fling, Jess' mother was never really present in Jess' life, not to an extent where he can remember her, that is. She hadn't wanted to raise him, so the moment she knew his father, Jackdaw, could raise him without much issue, Jess was handed over to him. Jackdaw had been young at the time, and Jess was absolutely a surprise, but a surprisingly happy one for Jackdaw, who, despite the difficulties in raising an infant on his own, was absolutely eager and overjoyed to have a kid of his own, having always wanted to be a father, even if Jess had come to him through something young and reckless rather than a marriage. Thankfully, after a couple years of working two jobs to make ends meet, Jackdaw managed to score a job as a naval architect, giving him a means of supporting himself and Jess far more smoothly. He moved into a suburb near Roseridge, also eager to move Jess into an area he would be able to grow up happily in.
As they settled into their new home, Jess met a girl around his age that lived across the street from him; Lucy Circe, and, considering the two also went to the same school, they grew close extremely fast, something Jackdaw noticed and encouraged, always happy to welcome Lucy over anytime Jess would insist she come by. Growing up alongside Lucy made life seemingly perfect to Jess, who began growing more and more interested in pursuing something in aquatic science as he aged, quickly growing an affinity for swimming and for marine biology as well as herpetology. And as Jess and Lucy stuck alongside one another, Jess' feelings only grew fonder of her, to the point that when middle school rolled around it was...somewhat obvious, at least to Jackdaw, that his feelings had grown into a small crush (at the time), not that Jess would have ever admitted it at the time. Even if the thought of being at Lucy's side for the rest of their lives did sound endearing.
As they continues growing up, Lucy and Jess eventually brought a third member into their little friend group, forming a Trio with the addition of Meredith Owens, another misfit who they happily took in. The three became inseperable, with Jess eventually becoming aware of Mer's situation at home and quickly offering his place as a place of refuge anytime she needed it, the same offer going for Lucy, with Jackdaw heavily approving it and becoming somewhat of a support figure for the entire group as well. As high school passed, Jess also became well aware of his feelings for Lucy, at long last, but had absolutely no idea what to do about them, even if Lucy felt the absolute same way for him (and this was likely obvious to literally everyone around them, too, but somehow not entirely obvious to either of them). And there was a chance for their relationship to evolve into something romantic, too, they had just been about to have that in their grasp when, suddenly, out of nowhere, in his late junior year, Jackdaw informed Jess that they were moving back to Scotland sometime later in the year.
While it was for a good reason, to be closer with family as well as a better paying job, Jess was absolutely distraught over this. Because he had everything he wanted in America, why would he ever want to leave? Especially considering his bond with Meredith and especially Lucy. How could he leave that behind just like that? But there was nothing he could do to prevent it, and sometime in the fall semester of his senior year, Jess moved, tearfully leaving his friends and his crush behind. And despite knowing that he had the chance of having a relationship with her still despite the move, Jess grew terrified of the potential of him never seeing Lucy again, even if that as a thought was silly, considering Jess was a year away from adulthood and logically could come back anytime he wanted. But his anxiety prevented him from thinking rationally, too afraid of not being able to give Lucy the relationship he felt she deserved to not overthink routes that led to the worst possible outcomes. So...surely, Jess decided to communicate his fears with Lucy, and find a compromise or even some reassurance that it could work?
Nope. What Jess did instead was panic and abruptly, out of nowhere, ghost not just Lucy, but Meredith as well, cutting contact with both of them entirely. The move was impulsive, clearly anxiety-driven, and left Jess completely alone and miserable, but he felt like it was the right choice. The only way to assure Lucy could move on past him and that he could do the same with her. And it took two years for Jess to realise just how wrong he really was, if the guilt hadn't tipped him off already from seeing Lucy continue to try texting him for some time after until...she stopped.
Adulthood
Once he graduated, Jess went into college for marine biology, and as time passed into his time in Scotland, Jess also began to visit a therapist for his anxiety, which not just helped Jess get medication and proper ways to cope with his anxiety, but also helped him realise just how badly he'd fucked up, leaving Jess horrified with himself and...far different after two years of also working on himself. Jess had grown, becoming far more confident in himself and far more intent on communicating when things went wrong, but he hadn't been that way when he'd cut Lucy and Meredith off, and all he wanted to do was make up for that. So...Jess finally told his father what he'd done, desperately asking him for advice. Through this, Jess realised very quickly that a phone call or text wouldn't suffice for him, he wanted to go back and find Lucy and Meredith, so he could apologise to them in person. Surely, they deserved a chance to grill him for everything in person rather than over the phone, right? And while he wasn't sure if either of them would let him back in after what he'd done, he wanted to make up for the three years he'd left them for, and if they gave him the chance to, he'd take it without hesitation.
So, with his father promising that he'd help Jess move back to America if Jess worked to earn most of the money for the trip and to get himself the ability to study abroad or to transfer back to Roseridge, Jess worked his ass off for almost a year, which of course led him to packing his things in a couple bags along with his cat, Beau, and moving back to America for his second year of college on his own, living on his own for the first time...in an entirely different country he hadn't been in for three years. But he took it in stride, settling in his dorm and taking time to get a job at an animal shelter nearby as well as a stable start in school while he began looking for Lucy and Meredith.
He finally found and rekindled with Lucy at a college party sometime in the fall, apologising to her and allowing her to chew him out for leaving, and for a moment, Jess fully expected her to refuse to give him another chance, only for Lucy to allow it after a night that led to them both drunk and crashing at his dorm. He rekindled with Meredith soon after, after the woman promptly tore into him for what he did and how it affected Lucy, leaving Jess more lost with guilt, even if he knew he'd have to move past it and just prove to them both that he was going to be better from now on.
As time passed and he and Lucy rekindled, spending more and more time together, the feelings Jess had always known well enough he'd never lost returned to him fast. He was hesitant to admit them, despite preferring to be open about communication now, though eventually, the two did both end up finally getting the relationship they'd both wanted as kids, after Jess found out that Lucy felt the same for him all over again, much to his relief. With both of his friends by his side once again, and with the feelings he'd had for so long finally expressed, Jess felt the best he'd felt in years, and he was eager to keep living out the rest of their college years alongside them both.
Post Graduation
Once he graduates, Jess decides to pursue a career in wildlife rehabilitation and research, having always been interested in working in a nature reserve, or simply outside in general. He stays alongside Lucy as he promised, outside of likely taking her to Scotland to visit his father and to show her around, and the two eventually get married, something Jess had narrowly missed out on, had he not come back for her in the end. He keeps his promise, for sure, though, sticking alongside her and being just as devoted as he always wanted to be for the rest of his life.
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