Starting off with design because why not; but anyways I do like all the black, red, gold, and white for her clothes, it's such a simple color palette but you managed to have so much detail with it despite that, and they all work together to make her stand out! I also think her hair and eye colors helps break up the warmness of the red, and the cool colors draw attention to her face if that makes sense?
Design aside, I do like how she's royalty and seems agreeable and level-headed at first, but is also stubborn; it helps her fit her job but at the same time her stubborn streak helps her feel more human. I also think her speaking casually helps her feel more realistic too, because it helps her feel a bit more down-to-earth. I also think her self-esteem issues set up a contrast with her stubbornness and in general, the rest of her personality, and I do wonder how her personality will affect her job!
I also love how in-depth you described her powers and abilities, it really helps the reader imagine her fighting style in a fight scene in my opinion! I also like how you acknowledge that she isn't perfect and she still makes mistakes with her powers. Powers aside, I think her history in general is very interesting and has great potential; I was really drawn in by it and I really wonder how she'll face the threat of Akedime, and how she'll rule her subjects too. I also wonder about the disappearance of her parents too, and the truth behind it...
I also love how you have little Quotes and Trivia sections set up, they both develop her and help her come to life as a character; gah, I'm sorry that this is long, but overall I just really like her, and I really wonder how her story will turn out!
Renne Araa's Comments