Rabbit and Stone

Stonesnow | Hawthorn Crafter

Stonessnow sighed in relief and took a deep, cleansing breath as he padded out of the medicine den for the first time since injuring his paw during the Great Rabbit Run. 

He thought about what he'd like to do for his first day of freedom, then looked over at the nursery. Perhaps Rabbitheart would be up for that walk they'd talked about? That could be nice! They probably couldn't go super far (he wasn't quite sure of his new limitations yet), but it would be fun! Plus, he felt a little bad he hadn't managed to catch that rabbit he'd been after for her. Even though she hadn't known about it. 

He limped as quickly as he could to the nursery. "Rabbitheart? It's Stonesnow! I was wondering if you're still interested in going for a walk with me?"

--

Rabbitheart | Hawthorn Perm-Queen

It had been sometime since Rabbitheart had met her new friend; after Stonesnow approached her outside the nursery, she hadn't seem him since. Maybe it was silly to be disappointed... after all, the other cats of Hawthorn must be so busy. Who would have time to hang out with a cooped up perm-queen? But still, it ate away at her, made her second guess countless things. Did she say something wrong? Did she do something wrong? What if she was too quiet? Not quiet enough? She probably drove him away, like she did Quick.... 

Her gaze was cast to the ground, her paws absent-mindedly fiddling with the gorgeous blue trinket he had made for her. She was just about to go back into the nursery, find something to keep herself busy, when a voice she hadn't expected to hear wrung out to greet her. 

"Stonesnow!" she mewed, her surprise and delight getting the better of her; surprise and delight that died the moment she laid eyes on him, with worry in its stead. There was a gimp to his gait, and- her face paled when she saw the mangled state of his paw. "Oh, goodness, Stonesnow what happened?" she sounded horrified as she hurried over to him, wanting to help but not exactly sure how to.

--

Stonesnow | Hawthorn Crafter

Stonesnow beamed at the sight of Rabbitheart, all ready to purr in happiness- but the attention on his paw immediately made him blush and feel awkward instead. 

“Oh, uh, this? It’s nothing,” he said, trying to act casual even as a blush colored his cheeks. “I just… you know how everyone was catching rabbits during the Great Rabbit Run?” 

He tried to chuckle, hoping not to worry her too much. After all, it didn’t really hurt anymore- it was mostly just a case of trying to readjust his balance now. 

“Well, I uh- this is really dumb, but… I thought maybe… you’d like to share one? With me? If I caught one… so I tried, and, uh… I ran into the warren after it, and the whole thing collapsed behind me. It was really dumb, totally my fault. I guess that’s what I get for trying to do the hunters’ job by myself. I’m fine, though! It doesn’t hurt anymore, I’m just really wobbly now. That should ease up when I get used to not really walking on this paw, though.” He smiled brightly at her. “That’s why I thought maybe we could go for a short walk? I missed talking to you, and it would be good practice.”

--

Rabbitheart | Hawthorn Perm-Queen

She nodded slowly, waiting for the rest of the story to be told. It was the first time she had ever heard Stonesnow sound uncertain of himself, and she could only wonder what could have possibly gotten him so flustered like this. When he mentioned a warren collapsing on him, she went white as a sheet, absolutely horrified. 

"C-collapsed?" she squeaked. No wonder why he was flustered- goodness, if that had happened to her, why- why- well, she didn't know what she would have done! 

"That must have been so terrifying- oh Stone, I'm so sorry that happened to you," she frowned, and if she had been a more well-adjusted cat, she might have offered a gentle head bunt or pelt brush of sympathy. You know, like a normal cat. But instead, she was awkward, and this, and- well, no such thing happened. A pit in her stomach formed as she realized that he was hurt because of her- he went to get the rabbit for her, after all. This wouldn't have happened if she hadn't talked to him in the first place; if she had just minded her business in the nursery den and not wished to be outside, to do something more. She curled in on herself, pulling her tail close to herself and fussing over it with her paws. 

So despite her heart nearly leaping out of her chest to say yes, she clutched it tightly and tried to keep it in a cage, fretting terribly. Old habits from her mother came to the surface. "I would love to-... but- what if you get hurt again? Or worse? It's so dangerous out there-"

--

Stonesnow | Hawthorn Crafter

Stonesnow smiled at her. “Well… I can’t be scared for the rest of my life, right? I should probably… you know, try again? But we also don’t even have to leave camp if you don’t want to.” He sat down, purring, and smiled happily at Rabbitheart. 

“Mostly I just want to spend time with you! I can’t think of a better way to celebrate finally being out of the medicine den.”

--

Rabbitheart | Hawthorn Perm-Queen

Sure you could. Couldn't you? Softwillow always said it was better to err on the side of caution; too much could go wrong. It went wrong with Quick, it went wrong with her father, and now, it went wrong with Stone. Cats kept getting hurt because of her, because they weren't careful enough, because she didn't listen to her mother. She was practically wringing her poor tail out by now, her claws digging into the thick fur as she tried to avoid her mind going down the figurative rabbit hole. 

Well, not this time. She would be good, and squash her dreams, because that was all they were good for, anyways, and this way no one would get hurt. Not on her watch. StarClan above, she should probably send Stonesnow away, to keep him safe when all she did was cause trouble, but.... well, she was selfish. She wanted to spend more time with him, and if he did too, what was the harm? They'd be safe in camp. They would be safe in camp. 

"You must be tired of being all cooped up in there," she said. "I can't imagine being in the medicine den for that long (famous last words)! You don't have to still see Wildflower for your paw, do you?" Perm-Queens might have basic knowledge in medicine, but this was a mangled paw: this was far above Rabbitheart's pay grade. What do you do for that?

--

Stonesnow | Hawthorn Crafter

Stonesnow smiled. “Yeah, it was getting boring! Wildflower says I don’t have to spend the night anymore- just stop by every few days to make sure it’s still healing okay. She says in a few visits I should be completely free.” He smiled fondly at her. 

“So, how have you been while I’ve been cooped up? I hope you’ve had a nice few days. And that you like your little accessory!”

--

Rabbitheart | Hawthorn Perm-Queen

"That's good news," she mewed, grateful that there didn't seem to be any complications; even if the mere presence of his twisted paw still ate away at her. Not because it was twisted in the first place, of course- but because a nagging voice in the back of her head continued to berate her every time she saw it. He's hurt because of you. You did this. It's your fault. You're worthless, you're-

"What?" she jolted out of her thoughts, eyes glassed over in confusion for a moment. She had only caught half of what Stonesnow said, and felt awful about that, too. 

"O-Oh, I love it! It's so pretty; and it doesn't slide off my tail at all. You're a wonderful crafter, Stonesnow." She had heard something about having a nice few days, but pointedly did not comment on that. Her anxiety didn't allow her such luxuries for the past few days, and the looming threat of a war had only exacerbated it.

--

Stonesnow | Hawthorn Crafter

Stonesnow beamed at her, delighted that she liked his little gift. “That’s good! I’m glad you like it! It looks so beautiful with your fur, and it really brings out your eyes!” He gave her a gentle nudge with his nose then, hoping it wasn’t an unwelcome gesture. 

“Hey, are you okay? Is something wrong?”

--

Rabbitheart | Hawthorn Perm-Queen

What normally would have had Rabbitheart giggling and bashful had her offer a small smile. She wanted to reassure him, but she couldn't tell him what she truly thought; so she went with something that wasn't quite a lie, but also not the whole truth. 

"I'm just.... I'm worried about MossClan," she said, almost in a whisper. "Three of our Clanmates came back the other day hurt from them..."

--

Stonesnow | Hawthorn Crafter

Stonesnow nodded a bit. “Yeah… they’re getting really bold lately.” 

He gave Rabbitheart a gentle nudge. “It’s okay, though. We don’t have to go for a walk or anything if you don’t feel like it. We can spend time together here in camp where it’s safe.”  

He smiled at her. “How are the kits? I bet they’re doing well, with a talented queen like you helping to look after them.”

--

Rabbitheart | Hawthorn Perm-Queen

She hated that she didn't feel any better, but instead like a wet nest. She took a breath and forced a smile, hoping that would be enough to ease Stonesnow's worries a bit.  

"They're doing well! Tuftstar and Tinyberry's kits should become apprentices any day now- it's going to be so quiet once they do." she seemed distracted by this a moment. "B-but with Rootsplit here, I'll still have kits to look after. I feel so awful for her- to run away from MossClan? She must be so brave."

--

Stonesnow | Hawthorn Crafter

Stonesnow smiled, and gave her a little nod. “I think she is too… I can’t imagine it’s very easy to leave a place like MossClan. I’m glad she knew her kits were better off in a different Clan, though. And she couldn’t have picked a better one! They’ll be the happiest kits in the territories with you to help look after them.” 

He purred at Rabbitheart, feeling very proud of her for being such an excellent permanent queen. She did such a good job at anything she set her mind to! He respected that about her so much.

--

Rabbitheart | Hawthorn Perm-Queen

"No, it must have been very hard," she mewed solemnly. Especially with the father being.... she frowned, not even wanting to finish the thought. Rootsplit hadn't kept it a secret, but it still felt wrong to say it out loud. Those poor kits.... 

"They'll need everyone's help. They need kindness, and patience, or else.... well, every kit needs that, but.... you know what I mean, don't you? I just hope everyone won't treat them poorly."

--

Stonesnow | Hawthorn Crafter

“No, I think you’re right,” Stonesnow assured Rabbitheart, glancing into the nursery. “Those kits deserve to have the whole Clan behind them. All kits need the love and support of their Clanmates, but these kits need it more than most. We don’t want MossClan to try and take them or hurt them.” 

He nudged her with his nose, giving her a fond smile. “I know they’ll get the support they need with you looking after them, Rabbitheart. You’re a not just a good permanent queen, you’re also a wonderful cat with a good heart.”

--

Rabbitheart | Hawthorn Perm-Queen

A soft, genuine smile appeared on Rabbitheart's face at that. She knew how some of her Clanmates could be about outsiders, but as far as she was concerned, they were Hawthorn cats now. She was glad Tuftstar was standing up to Lycanstar, and keeping Hawthorn safe. She only hoped that everyone else felt the same as Stonesnow; that these new Clanmates of theirs were worth fighting for. 

If she was a more confident cat, she might have rubbed her cheek on his forehead at the gesture and sweet words, but instead she only stammered, her face growing hot. "A-anyone would be kind to them. It's the right thing to do!" she said quickly, too embarrassed to look at him. "If it had been one of us who ran away, we'd want the same kindness, right?"

--

Stonesnow | Hawthorn Crafter

Stonesnow was glad his words seemed to have cheered up the pretty she-cat. He much preferred when she was happy to when she looked nervous or sad. It was like her blue eyes sparkled when she was happy.

Mesmerizing.

“Right,” Stonesnow purred, smiling at her. “But not everyone has the same kind and thoughtful heart you do. Plenty of cats would probably blame them for Lycanstar’s actions. It’s not fair, but… cats can be prejudiced. Biased. They don’t always think clearly.” 

He gave her a fond look. Sitting and talking with Rabbitheart was so nice. He always felt calm and happy in her presence.

--

Rabbitheart | Hawthorn Perm-Queen

She knew he was right: look at how many of their Clanmates assumed the whole of MossClan was behind their tyrannical leader (Rabbitheart couldn't will herself to believe an entire clan of cats was evil; she just couldn't). But just because he was telling the truth didn't mean she had to like it. "Well, I hope they keep it to themselves, then. Rootsplit's been nothing but kind; and I doubt her kits will be any different." 

She sounded almost uncharacteristically bold here; if a cat didn't know her any better, they might think she'd tell off anyone who didn't. But Rabbitheart was a meek cat- surely she wouldn't be able to muster up enough courage against a clanmate.  

She sighed, as if realizing this- she seemed to curl back into her shy self. "I'm glad you're not biased, Stonesnow. I-It's nice to talk to someone who doesn't think I'm naive for thinking things like this."

--

Stonesnow | Hawthorn Crafter

Stonesnow smiled at her. “Well, I’ll be on their side with you if anyone tries to be cruel to them,” he promised. “You just tell me who’s being mousebrained and I’ll set them straight for you!” Rabbitheart’s kind words made him blush a bit. “Well, er- I don’t think it’s right to hate cats who haven’t hurt me or people I care about,” he said. 

“I mean, it’s easy to see Lycanstar isn’t a good cat, but Rootsplit has been kind so far, and just because they share blood with him, it doesn’t mean his kits will be cruel like he is. I think the cats who are really naive are the ones who try to make the Clans black and white. As much as I don’t like to think about it, maybe not every cat in HawthornClan is good. But that also means that it’s very possible that not every cat in MossClan is bad either.”

--

Rabbitheart | Hawthorn Perm-Queen

It was a comfort, however small, to know that at least one cat would be on her side about this. It made her feel just the tiniest bit braver, and she let out a giggle as he talked. Oh no, no one yet- hopefully you won't have to set anyone straight!" she meowed., relaxing a bit despite herself. 

The idea that there could be bad Hawthorn cats hadn't ever crossed her mind, and truthfully, it wasn't a thought she wanted to acknowledge. Sure, Stonesnow might be right, but... oh, she just couldn't believe that someone in her Clan could be evil. Sure, some of them were standoffish, and some a little more intimidating than others.... but that didn't make them bad, did it? 

Then again, Rootsplit is proof that not all cats in MossClan were horrible. Maybe that was why cats called her naive; she wanted to believe there was good deep down in everyone. "I don't think they'll be like Lycanstar at all," there was a surprising amount of conviction in her voice, as if she believed that wholeheartedly. Knowing Rabbitheart, she probably did. 

"They have a second chance here. They can be who they want to be; not who their fathers wants them to be." A pang of jealousy hit her then, green and ugly and unfamiliar. She placed a paw to her chest, confused, but tried to wave it off.

--

Stonesnow | Hawthorn Crafter

Stonesnow nodded a bit, and looked at Rabbitheart in confusion as her paw went to her chest. He didn’t know what had happened, but she seemed a bit confuse, maybe unsure of some feeling. He gave her a gentle nuzzle with his nose. 

“You’re absolutely right, Rabbitheart,” he assured her. “Anyone can be anything. Especially here in HawthornClan. I bet if Bumblesting went to Tuftstar tomorrow to become a hunter, he could. Not that that cat would ever be a hunter, he’s too obsessed with bringing back the coolest stuff from the Twolegplace and getting himself in trouble so he can tell stories about how brave he is.” 

Stonesnow snorted. It might sound harsh, but it was the truth! Bumblesting had always been a brat. “If you wanted to be a Scout, you could. I mean, that’s probably one of the only jobs I couldn’t change to if I wanted to, and that’s just because I’m not sure how easy it would be for me to get to Twolegplace on my paw. There’s no reason to settle for less than what will make your heart happy.”

--

Rabbitheart | Hawthorn Perm-Queen

Rabbitheart felt her face grow hot as soft fur nuzzled her briefly, and it took all the composure she had not to make a fool of herself over it. She wanted to believe in Stonesnow's words more than anything- and for any other cat, she'd agree wholeheartedly. But what else was Rabbitheart good for? She didn't know the first thing about hunting; she wasn't brave; she wasn't strong; she wasn't even creative. She would just be a burden to her Clan as anything else. No, this was all she was good for- looking for anything else was just selfish. 

"Oh, goodness, I don't- I mean, I could never be a Scout-" she said, and her nervous habit of mussing over her tail came back up as she spoke.  How on earth did he guess the one role she wanted more than anything? It wasn't that obvious... was it? 

"They travel so far, and they see so many dangers... I don't mind being in the nursery. I'm out of everyone's way here. It's better this way, really!" she insisted. Besides, her poor mother would have a heart attack if she heard her only daughter was going to be leaving the Clan for days at a time.

--

Stonesnow | Hawthorn Crafter

“Out of everyone’s way’?” Stonesnow repeated, confused. “You’d never be in the way, Rabbit! You’re our Clanmate, and if you ever wanted to do something else I’m sure you’d have plenty of cats willing to teach you.” 

He didn’t understand why Rabbitheart was so hard on herself- couldn’t she see that she was a valued HawthornClan member? Why would she think so little of herself? As far as Stonesnow was concerned, she wasn’t just valued- she was one of his favorite cats in the Clan. 

“But if you wanted to be a Scout, if you want to see more of the world besides the territories and you want to see what’s waiting out there… why shouldn’t you? I bet if someone gave you the chance to be, you’d surprise everyone with your bravery. And not every cat chooses the right job when they’re an apprentice. The Clan functions at its best when we’re happy with what we do. I think you’re an amazing queen, but if you ever decide you’re not happy in that role, you should be able to choose a new one without fear.”

--

Rabbitheart | Hawthorn Perm-Queen

Despite Stonesnow's affirmations, Rabbitheart couldn't help but feel doubt. Sure, Stonesnow felt that way, but not every cat would be as patient, or even tolerable. It's easy to teach someone when they have a set of skills to grow upon; Rabbitheart hasn't even the faintest clue how to defend herself, or catch her own food. She truly believed she was unteachable; that at least in the nursery, she could be soft and gentle and it would be put to good use.  

....besides, what if she tried to learn, and found out she didn't like it? She would just be wasting everyone's time. No, it was better for her to stick to what she knew. 

"You're very kind, Stonesnow," she began with a quiet mew. "But this is the best place for me. I'm useful here- and I like being useful. I'll leave the exploring to the cats who can handle it."

--

Stonesnow | Hawthorn Crafter

Stonesnow nodded a bit, deciding not to push the issue further. “Whatever makes you happy,” he told her, giving her an adoring smile. “I always want you to be happy. Especially when you make my day just by talking to me. I’m lucky to have you as a friend, Rabbitheart.”

--

Rabbitheart | Hawthorn Perm-Queen

Rabbitheart returned the smile half-heartedly, as if trying to convince herself as well as Stonesnow that this was what she wanted. "I... I think you're the sweetest cat I've ever met, Stonesnow. Almost no one's ever been this nice to me before." she admitted, her face growing hot from embarrassment. She closed her eyes briefly as Quick flashed through her mind- but she quickly shook it away. He'd moved on by now, she was sure- it wouldn't be fair to him to dwell on the past.  

She must have misheard him, though- she could have sworn he called her his friend.

--

Stonesnow | Hawthorn Crafter

Stonesnow felt his face turning bright red as he blushed under his fur. 

“Oh- well- I can’t imagine anyone ever not wanting to be nice to you! You’re so sweet and pretty!” He realized what he had said and momentarily froze. Oh, no! Stonesnow, you idiot! he chastised himself, feeling embarrassment creeping over him like spiders up his pelt.

--

Rabbitheart | Hawthorn Perm-Queen

"You- whaa-?" For a moment, it almost seemed as if Rabbitheart hadn't heard him right; she opened her mouth to respond to him in kind, only to stop as her hearing caught up with her brain. Her mouth clamped shut, her eyes went wide, and her poor brain exploded. She had no idea what to say, or do, except look at the ground in the hopes that that might obscure how utterly dopey she looked in that moment.

--

Stonesnow | Hawthorn Crafter

“Er- Rabbitheart? Are you okay?” He asked, sounding worried. “I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable, I didn’t mean to!” 

He felt awful. Rabbitheart had been an amazing friend to him, so kind, sweet, and affectionate- and he’d screwed it up with one slip of the tongue. Stupid!

--

Rabbitheart | Hawthorn Perm-Queen

Oh no, oh dear. Rabbitheart only grew more flustered as Stonesnow seemed to get upset, wanting to know if he had overstepped. A normal cat would just out and say something; but this was Rabbitheart, and social outfittings were not her specialty. She shook her head up and down quickly, almost frantically, and when the words wouldn't come out of her mouth how she wanted to, she shoved her face into the nearest thing she could find; not yet realizing that that particular thing was Stonesnow's shoulder. 

She couldn't tell what she was; happy, uncomfortable, giddy, panicked? It was all so confusing, and her voice betrayed her emotions as she finally managed to say, "You think I'm pretty?"

--

Stonesnow | Hawthorn Crafter

Stonesnow sort of wished a hole would open up beneath him and swallow him whole, although when Rabbitheart hid her face in his shoulder, he felt a flutter of warmth and happiness in his chest. Maybe she likes me back!“O-of course,” Stonesnow said awkwardly. 

“N-not just pretty, actually… I think you’re the most beautiful cat in HawthornClan.” 

It was one of those confessions that made your heart sing when you said it, but also made your brain panic a bit waiting for the rejection for your deepest feelings. Stonesnow wasn’t sure Rabbitheart would reciprocate, but… well, he had to try, right?

--

Rabbitheart | Hawthorn Perm-Queen

Rabbitheart's ears flattened against her head as her face flushed. A tidal wave of emotions hit her at once, overwhelming her. She felt like she could jump to the moon; like she might be sick; like she was in a dream; like her heart was going to leap out of her chest. 

She didn't move from where she was; what should she say? It's not like she ever thought someone would say such things before.... at least not to her. 

Should she just... say it back? Yes, that sounded reasonable, and she did think he was a handsome cat. She managed to stammer out, uncertain, I-I think you're pretty, too."

--

Stonesnow | Hawthorn Crafter

Stonesnow felt his heart leap in his chest, and tried to appear cool and calm as he stammered out, “O-oh… y-you do? Um… th-that’s good!” 

Mentally, he slapped himself. What kind of a response was that?! 

“Er… I’m glad you think so, I mean… that makes me lucky.”

--

Rabbitheart | Hawthorn Perm-Queen

She knew that was a silly response. Mentally, she wished she was like some of the other she-cats of the Clan; the ones who were so confident, who always knew what to say, even in situations like this. Stonesnow's nerves were enough to snap Rabbitheart out of it, at least for a moment. She withdrew her head from his shoulder and looked up at him, confusion in her soft blue eyes. 

"How does that make you lucky?" she asked, not putting two and two together. Maybe because she was a cat, and cats can't do math.

--

Stonesnow | Hawthorn Crafter

Stonesnow’s blush deepened with Rabbitheart’s question, and he smiled nervously at her. “Well… er….” he began awkwardly, “I mean, that didn’t really come out right, but… I guess I mean… at least you don’t think I’m ugly or anything, especially after my paw.” 

He was fairly certain he was screwing up whatever chance he might have with Rabbitheart in the future, but… well, give him a break! He’d never tried flirting before! 

(Maybe he should have asked someone to help him practice or something? Oh, but that would be so weird-) 

“I-I mean, uh… l-like, if you ever decided you wanna pick a mate, or something- n-not that I think you do now, or anything- u-um… well… m-maybe I have a shot?” 

It was almost certainly a dumb thing to say and he knew it, but poor Stonesnow was fumbling over his own words so much that he was struggling to pick anything that didn’t immediately sound horrifically stupid in his mind.

--

Rabbitheart | Hawthorn Perm-Queen

What? Why on earth would Stonesnow think he was ugly? Her face contorted, as if upset by the mere notion of it. He was kind, he was handsome- who would ever say something hurtful to him? 

She was just about to ask him if anyone had told him that when he spoke up again- and Rabbitheart froze. Mates? It was simultaneously the most exciting and most terrifying thing he'd ever said to her. Her eyes grew wide. Her heart stopped. Her head swam.  

She panicked. 

"I-I have to go!" she said quickly- too quickly, and nearly stumbled over her paws in her haste. She didn't even know where she was going, but the brain hardly cares about such things when it's screaming to run.

--

Stonesnow | Hawthorn Crafter

“O-oh! O-okay!” Stonesnow said, disappointed but understanding. “Um, well… I’ll see you later?” But he wasn’t sure she’d even heard it. 

“Good going, Stonesnow,” he muttered to himself. He was both disappointed and a little relieved. He was upset that his feelings didn’t seem to be reciprocated, but… at least he’d told her how he felt.