Bluebells in my Lover's Hair

1309 AE

 

Bluebell watched in mild amusement as the man seated at her bar faked yet another sip of the ale she’d served him. She might’ve felt offended, if it hadn’t meant she could get away with watering down his second glass much more than she normally could. 

The man arrived with a few friends, but he was clearly very much a wallflower, and didn’t seem keen on conversing with them more than he needed to, smiling half-heartedly only when the fellow on his left jabbed him in the ribs with an elbow in jest. Yet he still pretended to drink in order to not stand out, to avoid attention being called onto him by his company. 

He was very good at feigning the action, indeed, it was just that as a seasoned barkeep, Bluebell was even better at spotting it. She hummed a small chuckle to herself. 

“Is the ale to your liking, sir?” She inquired, leaning forward and resting her pale blue face on top of slender, interlocked fingers. It was an innocuous question that his party paid no mind to, continuing their own animated conversation without a pause. She’d said it coyly enough that he would surely be able to pick up on the underlying message. His dark eyes, matching his long, half-up hair of the same shade, avoided hers. 

“I’m not a fan of ale,” He murmured in response, then said nothing else. How shy! 

It wasn’t unexpected, however. She knew exactly who this man was and why he was here, but she couldn’t deny the joy it gave her to be so close she could toy with him a bit. He was here on official business, on behalf of the Order of Whispers, Bluebell was certain, but he didn’t know that she knew, and in front of her patrons he could not break cover. 

“Yet here you are. Something awful must’ve happened for you to be drinking now, of all times. Somebody dump you? Did you get stood up? Did a loved one pass? I’m so sorry, please accept my condolences…” 

His brow knitted slightly, growing vexed at her obvious teasing. A woman who was sitting a few seats down from his left, a norn with dark, shoulder-length hair, let out a musical laugh over the top of her mug. “He’s just moody that Aurelia’s getting a promotion before he is. Ignore him!” 

“Nora…” He hissed under his breath, turning his face the other way with a sigh. 

Putting on a show of innocent surprise, Bluebell leaned towards the norn, flicking her eyebrows up high. “Aurelia? I know an Aurelia! She’s orange and little right? Like an autumn tree?”

Their other friend, a freckled asura perched in between them, gasped. He slammed a petite hand down on the counter, long, white ears flopping with the motion. “What! There’s actually someone who knows her? I was starting to get the feeling she just like… I dunno, walked out of the Mists or something. We don’t know anything about her from before-” 

“Luxx!” The human hissed again, a warning edge to his voice. 

“Unless you know things we don’t, Arth! She must have told you some things about her past!”

The man, Arth, simply rolled his eyes, not betraying if he did indeed know anything or not. But he did seem to be viewing Bluebell with reproach, the look in his eye suggesting that her saying she knew Aurelia from home struck a chord with him. “I think we’re getting off topic, here.” 

“There was a topic?” Bluebell asked, playing up the innocent act even higher. 

“Ignore him, I said,” The female norn, Nora, chimed in again, voice cool and slightly amused. “He’s a pain in the ass to talk to. Ah, but your name, Ms. Bluebell, is very lovely. It reminds me of a popular nornish poem. How does it go again…?” She mused.  “‘There are bluebells in my lover’s hair, vibrantly in bloom. Those bells, they chime without a care, while her voice does carry the tune. Woven in my partner’s hair, tangled among the stems. Like a roar from Mother Bear, my heart my love condemns.’” She recited this poem with a small smile that lifted her eyes in such a way she could only be described as charmingly beautiful.

At last, Bluebell allowed her smile to turn sharper, more knowing, although she kept her eyelids lowered and relaxed. “Aye, I believe I’ve heard such a poem before.” The first line was, after all, the code phrase the Order of Whispers used when they wished to contact her about an ongoing investigation. 

The bar she ran often catered to the scoundrels of society, most often human bandits, but on occasion were Inquest and courtiers here and there. As she was a charmer herself, she was good at talking information out of them, and her patrons never came to distrust her. It was only natural that the Order eventually reached out to ask her to be a contact for their organization. 

She had no reason not to comply, she shared no true camaraderie with any of these bastards, so each night she kept a record of interesting conversation pieces she’d overheard or worked out of a wasted patron. A record that was kept inside of a leather journal she was now pulling from beneath her bar’s counter.

“I’m actually something of a poet myself, my lovely friend, if you wouldn’t mind reading a few and sharing your opinions,” She lied as naturally as breathing as she slid the journal to Nora, opening to a bookmarked page. The norn accepted with a delighted ‘Oh!’.

Giving her time for her and her companions to sift through the notes, Bluebell busied herself with a bandit customer a few seats down, serving him a glass of her strongest liquor, per his request. Although she was morbidly curious as to what he wanted it for, he seemed far too bothered about… whatever it was for her to want to pry. Instead, she told him to ask for anything she could get him, and went off to wash some dishes.

As she worked, she watched the group of agents out of the corners of her eyes. 

Arth had sidled closer to the asura on his left, leaning forward as far as he could with his right elbow braced casually on the counter, resting his face on the backside of his hand. Luxx, didn’t seem to mind the lack of personal space, for he, too, was draped unceremoniously across the forearm of Nora, examining the journal with interest. 

The three occasionally muttered between themselves while gesturing to different passages. At one point, Arth began drawing some sort of diagram in the air, seemingly explaining some sort of theory with an air of disinterest. Despite his lack of enthusiasm, Nora and Luxx looked to respect the man, listening attentively and offering occasional feedback. At last, they seemed to reach an agreement, and Nora gestured for Bluebell to return, closing the journal and sliding it back across the bar to her.

“Miss Bluebell, your poetry collection is simply beautiful! You truly have a way with words… in fact, you’ve inspired me to take up the art again, myself. You’ve left me with… much to consider. You have my thanks.”

Pale Mother, these agents and their spoken metaphors.

“I’m glad you like what you see! Perhaps I’ll consider publishing someday, if it would interest anybody. Can I get you three anything else to drink tonight?” She replied, voice dripping with honey. 

They exchanged a few glances containing unspoken words broken only by Arth abruptly rising to his feet. “You two can stay if that’s what you want. I’m turning in for the night.”

“‘Kay,” said Luxx, swinging his feet, happy that they wouldn’t have to accompany him back. He wanted to get drunk. “G’night.”

“Take care, Arth,” Nora hummed whilst handing her empty glass back over to Bluebell. “A refill for me, please.”

“He doesn’t like to hang around, does he?” She commented as she watched his slight form slip out the door.

“Oh, not at all,” Luxx answered, handing her his glass as well. “Me too, please.”

She pursed her lips as she looked towards the entrance for a moment longer, then, with an indifferent shrug, she set to work on making those drinks. 

… 

Arth walked for a time before finding a waypoint in Kessex Hills and taking it back back home, having not quite been ready to abandon the quiet wilderness in exchange for the neverending bustle of Lion’s Arch, as well as having an aversion to novel technology like waypoints. City living had… never been to his taste. Even back at home, he lived in rural towns when he wasn’t living on his own in the mountains. In Elona too, it had mostly been a lot of travel along the comfortably expansive desert landscape. Yet here he was, standing in front of the door of a shoddy apartment in a dark corner of the pirate city, crowded tight between two, equally decrepit, tall buildings.

Ignoring the huge hunk of meat in his hands, fresh from the butcher, it was very nearly a perfect picture of lonely domesticity as he returned home from a tiring day of work, pulling the door open with his foot, and sighing quietly. 

Several gruff, yet pleased, cat chatters sounded with his appearance. Caesar, his young tiger, was the first to approach, tail raised high in greeting. Then, his jungle stalker, Morrow, slunk forward to attempt a few early nibbles at the slab of meat Arth was clutching protectively, ignoring all the grumbles of protest the man made. 

Jynx raised her dark furred head from where she slept on his couch, sleepily blinking at him a few times before unceremoniously sliding onto the floor and joining the other two big cats. 

“Okay, okay all of you, relax. You act like I never feed you. I have to cut it up first so knock it off,” He hissed, pushing past them, to which they each gave annoyed grouching of their own. 

He set to work carving the cats’ dinner up, each chop of his knife sounding like a violent murder was taking place to any pedestrian outside the building. Caesar, too impatient to wait, contented himself by settling down on Arth’s feet and gnawing on his shoes and calves. New, deep toothy imprints joined old ones in the leather of his boots. 

He couldn’t care enough to stop the headstrong tiger. 

Morrow raised up onto his hind legs and lifted his head up and over the top of the table, drool pooling from his maw. Only the knife kept him at bay from stealing the entire haunch out from under his master’s hands.

By the time he had three even pieces sitting next to a significantly larger fourth, he realized all three cats were giving his front door suspicious stares. 

Joining them, he stood silent for a long moment without hearing or seeing anything out of place. He very nearly chalked it up to the trio being strange, or being in on a joke that he wasn’t, but a slight floral aroma touched his nose. 

He couldn’t place it, but it was certainly familiar.

“Who’s there?” He lifted his voice, filling it with confidence that he knew there was somebody on the other side. He must’ve startled the stranger, the gravel outside crunched a few times, as if they were backing away. That wouldn’t do.

Crossing the room in a few quick strides, Jynx dutifully falling into step by his side, he threw the door open with his knife raised. Moonlight glinted hard on the blade’s edge and his hands, and he belatedly realized just how much blood he was covered in. 

“Did you just… Who did you just kill?” The stranger asked in a light feminine tone, familiar and not, all at once. He studied the cloaked figure, now about ten hesitant steps away from him in a pose that was ready to flee in an instant. Just beneath the hood…

“... Barkeeper?” He couldn’t keep the disbelief out of his voice. “How the hell did you follow me?” 

“Can’t reveal my tricks, but I’m not up to anything shady, I swear! You don’t have to kill me too!” She insisted, waving her hands in the air for mercy. 

“By the Six,” Arth said, lowering the knife hand and pinching the bridge of his nose with the other. “I did not murder anybody.” 

“You were butchering something!” 

“Dinner!” He said, but that didn’t seem to earn him any favors. 

“That’s a lot of blood just for dinner!” She said, taking another step back. “Are you chopping up an entire cow in there?” 

Jynx licked her chops and chuffed, seeming offended just then. He gave her a firm pat on the head, and stepped away from his door, gesturing inside to the two male cats sending the barkeeper the most passive aggressive looks in all of Tyria for delaying their meal. 

He rolled his eyes. “It’s for the cats, of course.”

“What about me?” A young, offended voice sounded from behind, making Arth jump. A young human girl was clinging to Caesar’s back haunches, looking up at the older man wearing a miffed expression.

“Selene? What are you doing here? I thought you were at the Chantry today,” He asked, voice low and fast.

“I was! But Aurelia dropped me off earlier because I wanted to play with the kitties,” She hissed right back, pouting. 

“Well, tell Aurelia that she should be staying out of my house, or I’ll…” He trailed off, remembering their company. He sharply turned back to the sylvari, narrowing his eyes in suspicion.

She was now studying the six year old girl with mounting interest and… thinly concealed disdain. “Are you a father?” 

“Why does it matter to you?” He took a defensive step in front of the girl. “You should go.” 

“Ah, but I only came to talk, I promise. May I come inside?” She said sweetly, daring a step forward to mimic his. 

He appeared puzzled for a moment, but was clearly thinking hard about her. Likely weighing the girl’s safety against his own curiosity. Bluebell was giving him a look that suggested she was expecting an outright refusal, but surprisingly enough, clarity came over his features and he simply asked, “Is this about Aurelia?”

The sylvari gave him a surprised blink. “How did you figure?” 

“I’ve just never met a single sylvari who claims to know who she is.” He replied, turning to walk back into his apartment. The cats obediently followed him back in, and so did young Selene. But the door remained open, so after a moment of hesitation, Bluebell joined them. 

She looked around, noting how dull the interior was, brightened up only by toys that obviously belonged to Selene. It was slightly more spacious than she expected, only on account of really… not having much in it. “How… quaint,” She said, tersely.

“All I need is a roof over my head,” He explained while finishing with slicing the cats’ dinner, and holding one smaller slab in the air. “Jynx, since you’ve been a good girl.” The dark panther ran her head into his waist with satisfaction and a slight ego at being the first to eat, and snatched it out of the air when he dropped it. 

Morrow was drooling again. 

“Caesar,” He said, lobbing a second slab at the tiger carelessly. “Stop chewing on my shoes and maybe you’ll go first next time.” 

He eyed Morrow with mock disappointment, waving the last small piece in the air in small movements. The stalker’s eyes followed it in every single direction. “You… are nothing but a thief and a scoundrel. Take it.” 

The stalker wasted absolutely no time before ripping it from his hand and tearing into it. Bluebell couldn’t help but giggle.

“You’re good with these cats. You’re a ranger?” She asked, still having not moved from the front door, not sure where to go. 

“Yes. I’ve worked with big cats my whole life. Selene?” He suddenly changed topic, looking over at where she was sitting on the couch, swinging her short legs.

“Yeah?”

“Have you eaten yet?”

“No…”

Arth sighed, getting a few more smaller cuts of meat from what was leftover and lighting the stove. “Next time she drops you off like this, tell her she’s in charge of dinner, ok?” 

“‘Kaaaaay. Is Katsu eating the rest?” Selene asked, hopping off the couch with far too much energy for someone her size. 

“Yes, do you mind giving it to them?”

She smiled widely when he set the rest of the meal in her hands, giving him an enthusiastic “I can!”, and hurried into the hall, nearly tripping on her own feet. 

Tending to Selene’s meal on the stove, he at last looked back to Bluebell. “Everybody’s antsy before dinner,” Arth said in a slight apologetic tone.

“Oh! No! It’s completely alright, I’m an uninvited guest after all!” She innocently chuckled, shifting her weight uncomfortably. He gave her a long, flat look that left her thoroughly unnerved. “What?”

“Drop the act, please. What do you want to know from me?” 

Disarmed, the corner of her smile twitched. “I underestimated your perceptiveness, it seems. Please forgive me, it’s just that I’ve been morbidly curious about you for a long time now.” 

“Go on.” 

“A… long time ago, Auri told me that she would be better off completely alone and cut ties with everyone who knew her. She left the Grove in the night without saying a word and never came home again. But I was in Lion’s Arch for different business a few years later and… I saw her with you. She was seeming to enjoy your company, and somehow looked happier despite having collected so many scars in that timeframe. I had so many things I wanted to ask her, but I didn’t dare have the nerve to approach. And again, I blinked, and she was gone. Now, it seems there’s this… child between you two. Can you see how I might feel a bit…”

As she spoke, he seemed to grow bemused. “You’re jealous.”

“Just a little bit,” She smiled right back. 

“Well then, to put your weeping heart at peace, Aurelia and I aren’t involved in the slightest.” He chiefly turned his cheek to her, refocusing on his cooking.

Bluebell lifted a hand to her chin, thoughtfully humming. Surely, that was a lie.

“Selene is not my child, she is my ward. Technically a ward of the Order itself, therefore Aurelia helps out.” 

“I see.”

His eyes flicked back to her, assessing. “Even so, Aurelia is her own woman who can see whomever she wishes. I’d hope that you’d respect that.”

“Of course I would,” She interjected. “The circumstances of her disappearance were frankly hurtful, that’s all. I did not know what to make of your closeness, and I have been unable to get any answers in all this time.” 

Some of the rigidness in his stance loosened, and he exhaled through his nose. “In that case… I assume after she left the Grove, Aurelia came to the Order seeking employment. To me, she seemed like she was lost, and desperate to change that. She’s never said why, but I figure it had to do with her Wyld Hunt. Regardless, as the first of the sylvari to be recruited, she was met with some difficulty, especially with her lack of skills at the time. I stepped in to mentor her in subterfuge and combat and helped her get into good standing.” Arth explained to her, hoping it would quell her worries. The barkeeper sounded worried that they had already met prior to Aurelia abandoning the Grove. “At first, she was withdrawn and defensive, but as she grew more confident in her hard-earned skills, she really brightened up in such a horrible, smartass way. Now she’s the one who bosses me around, and she’s soon to be promoted to Lightbringer. I’m not in love with her, but I am proud.”

A tender, yet bittersweet, grin fought its way onto Bluebell’s lips at that, and the tension in her shoulders faded when her eyes turned downwards. “She’s always been a hard-worker.”

“She… puts her entire life into our work. Her social life suffers because of that drive, so I don’t doubt what you said about her making such extreme decisions,” He began hesitantly, thinking through his words carefully before they’re spoken. “I’ve never been in a position to chide her for it. There’s only very few people involved in my life, as well.” 

As he said that, Selene happily scampered back into the room and climbed up onto a chair just in time for him to turn the stove off and finish preparing the dinner for her, adding a few last spices, and wiping the table clean with a damp rag.

“Is the pretty flower lady eating too?” She asked when he set her place down in front of her. He winced at the question, shooting Bluebell an apologetic look that said ‘I don’t have any more food’. She waved her hands in front of her and shook her head. 

“No need, I simply came to chat, not stay for dinner. I don’t have to intrude any longer.”

“You’re not intruding,” Arth said decisively, pulling a chair back for himself. “I’m not eating either, you’re welcome to stay longer.”

Selene cheered at that, staring at the sylvari wide-eyed. “Does flower lady have a name?”

After a moment of deliberation, she approached and joined the table, smiling over at Selene as she pulled her chair backwards and sat. “My name is Bluebell,” She said, holding her slender hand out, which Selene gladly shook. “Auri knows me as Iliana.” The last part was added with a slight nod in Arth’s direction. 

“It’s… a fitting nickname,” He mused, gesturing to the large blue flower that made up her hair while watching her interaction with Selene carefully. 

A blush came over her white-freckled cheeks. “... She came up with it,” She murmured, unable to make eye contact with him. “And it ended up sticking.”

A tiny puff of exasperated amusement escaped his nose. “Right along with every other thing she’s ever named, it’s startlingly unimaginative.” 

Bluebell laughed at that, the sound clear and genuine. Mischief glimmered in her gaze as she looked back at the man, leaning forward onto the table. “You noticed, too?” 

It looked as though a small grin was fighting onto his face as he leaned forward as well, raising his brows conspiratorially. “She has a cat. Found it on a mission a year ago and took it home with her. Named him ‘Toast’.” 

She continued to laugh as Selene sat up in her seat, waving her bite of steak in the air, taking offense to this gossip. “Toast is the best kitty!” She declared, glaring daggers at her guardian.
“Toast is a very good kitty,” He agreed, nodding his head emphatically. “It’s just… She ate toast that morning. She named him after her breakfast,” Arth sighed and shook his head. “And with such conviction too…”

Their conversations carried on in a similar manner throughout the evening, and Bluebell was surprised to find that all of her initial misgivings about Arth had evaporated with relative ease. 

He was a likable guy, she sheepishly admitted to herself. Pretty, polite, and witty, he was the portrait of a perfect common gentleman. Despite that, Bluebell couldn’t help but feel there was an air about him that felt a bit… morose. She paid close attention to him as he recounted a story to her, watching for his mannerisms and such, as she would any of her patrons that she was wringing for information, trying to figure out what it was that she was sensing.

She could see it in his dull, sparkless eyes, and in the tired curve of his shoulders. She could see it in the worn frown that quickly weighed every grin back down, and she could see it especially in the way he looked at Selene like she was the only person in the world who mattered.

And although he seemed to be cautiously warming up to Bluebell, allowing her to stay for their meal and making friendly conversation, he still felt so distant. As if there were several walls around him that she had yet to even reach. She hadn’t known it was possible to seem both open and uninterested at the exact same time.

He’d mentioned something earlier that Bluebell hadn’t given much thought to initially, but circled back to as she continued to study him carefully throughout the evening. He’d said that there weren’t very many people in his life, hadn’t he?

Oh, she finally realized.

He’s lonely.

“... Is there something on my face?” He suddenly asked, disarmed. Bluebell’s eyes widened, having not realized that she’d been staring. She flushed and waved a hand in front of her fervently, and laughed. “Oh no, I was just lost in thought, that’s all…”

The way his expression shifted was like he’d just been woken up by a splash of cold water. And just like that, his eyes became guarded and cautious again. She had no idea what she had done to trigger such a reaction, but she suddenly got the feeling that she would be overstaying her welcome sooner than later. Not letting him be the one to suggest her leave first, she gracefully stood from her chair and patted her simple dress down. 

“It’s gotten quite late, hasn’t it?” She pointed out with an easy smile.

Arth hesitated. “It certainly has,” He said softly, then joined her in standing. Selene, who’d nearly fallen asleep in her chair, perked back up in dismay. “Is Bluebell leaving? When is she coming back?” 

Bluebell chuckled, and dared to ruffle her loosely curled hair. “We both need our beauty sleep, Selene, and it’s getting to be that time.” 

“Awh…” 

A soft click sounded as Arth moved to hold the door open for her. “It was a welcome change of pace to have company for dinner,” He said carefully, a light smile gracing his lips. “I’m glad things have been cleared up now.”

She nodded her agreement. “Indeed, I apologize if I came across the wrong way at any time. I appreciate you letting me in… you’re an alright guy, I suppose,” Bluebell added as she stepped into the threshold of his door. Suddenly, she paused just in front of him, one hand resting on the doorframe. “Hey… If you’re ever wanting a drink, feel free to stop by. It’ll be on the house.”

Another hesitation. “I appreciate it, but I don’t drink anymore. It wasn’t a lie earlier.”

A smile and a soft exhale through her nose. “I’ve got non-alcoholic as well.”

The man looked down and ran a few fingers through a lock of his own long, silky hair that sat tucked behind his ear. “I suppose… If I’m ever in the area, I’ll keep it in mind.”

She nodded, and stepped past without another word. As Bluebell started walking towards her home, she glanced over her shoulder and waved goodbye, delighted to see that Selene had joined him at the door and was waving her own enthusiastic farewell. She watched as Arth silently scooped her up and over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes, inciting delighted shrieks from the young kid as he hauled her off to bed and let the door fall shut behind him. 

A heavy latch sounded soon after, and Bluebell was left on her own once more. The smile that had sat passively on her lips all evening dissipated.

Her footsteps felt a little bit more leaden on her way back that night.

She was lonely, too.