Little house on the tip of Texas

There was a very particaler order in how my household worked when I was growing up, one I didn't think too much on back then, but looking back on it it was a odd way of doing things.

My oldest brother and sister where born in 1940 May 12th, they where twins and they looked it too, they have the same faces and are the same hight. The one who was born first was Abe, actually he was born a full hour ahead of he's twin Becky, as the story go's she wouldn't come out and the maid didn't know what to do, also worrsome was that Abe wouldn't cry, he was very still. When Becky did come out she looked blue and dead, my mother was sure she died in her, and my father said that was the only reason Becky was mom's favorite but I don't agree with that. It was long time till either of the twins made any noises, Becky was thankfully alive and Abe was too, but both of them where very small and very ill looking, they stayed that way till they where around 2 years old, and afterwards they started to act the way children should. Before they where very dead looking babies, they didn't do what babies should which scared mother a lot. But they got better quickly, now they went from never crying too talking in a second. and they grown pretty, and stayed light skinned no matter how long they stayed out in the sun. They both where tall for 13 year old's too, Becky was almost the size of a avrage woman then and only God known then what Abe was gonna look like someday size wise. They both had strange faces too, and if they wanted to give up being kind people that scary face would do them both proud. Becky was a lot thinner then her twin, and she had very tiny feet and hands, part of her being so thin was just how she was built, but a bigger part was that she ate so little. No one back then but Abe seemed to care about that back then, so no one tried to fix it but him, and what could he do? Abe was built thin as well, but at 13 he's shoulders where suprisingly large. He surely got that from he's grandfather who looked like a bull. He had he's smile too, one second he'd look like he was going to pound on someone and the next he'd smile at you like your where he's child.

Born in 1941 was my older brother, the middle child Caleb. Like Abe and Becky he's birth wasn't a smooth one, but he got better quick. The only problem with he's younger years then was when he got too around 8 years old he didn't talk much, and by the time he was 12 even less. He had blouder hair then me, more yellow, but that only pointed out he's problem more. See he for some reason, and don't worry I know why now, he had started growing white hairs after he was 10. Abe wanted to shave he's head, but for some reason Caleb was proud of the white hairs he had, never said why he just wanted to keep them. Now he was very thick (unwashed) hair. Abe wouldn't let him let it get long, but he did let him keep it thick. But every time he cut it more white hairs where shown.

Then me, the youngest girl. I was born in 1945. My birth was suposdly the easist on the baby, but for mom it wasn't as much. for the time in this story, I am 8, and back then I was large for my age like my twin siblings, and people talked a lot about that back then, but don't worry, as a woman I am of a normal size. My hair back then very long bloude and always pulled back into two ponytails, then anyway. Not sure what else there is to say about myself for now, besides my name being Deb. Well really it was Debbie but I don't really go by that.

The youngest one of us was Eddie, our little baby. He was born in 1948. None of us where with mom the day she gave birth, or the week. Only dad saw her then and entrusted Abe and Becky to watch after Caleb and me while they where gone. In fact we didn't know she was that late in the pregancy so when she came home with a little baby boy we all where shocked. Mom said that he was born in the backset of a car, which back then I thought was very funny. He was a much more lively baby then any of he's siblings where. When he got bigger he smiled a lot too. Though then he was tall for he's age like the rest of us, he's face was always full and flush. He's hair was like mine, but by five it started to get a little darker, it wasn't quite brown yet but it was cutting it close. In fact I think he's hair was more or less orange now.

It's hard to talk about them so bluntly, and not talk about what they would be someday, but back then they where all very simple, at least that's how I saw them.

On May of 1953 all five of us where stuffed into two different cars driven by two different fathers. In one car, the one that was in the lead had Abe and Eddie in it, he insisted Becky stay with us little children. So Becky Caleb and me where in the second car. I practically screamed when I was told I couldn't be in the same car as Eddie, but Abe wanted to be the one to take care of him if any problems came up. So far the drive had been four hours long and it was getting that purpleish blue color in the sky, and the shadows off the trees blended into nature more then before. I felt Becky rub my shoulder for a few before I woke up, she looked beat. When I saw Caleb looking out the window I pressed my small hands against the other window and looked out. Out there was a dirt path we where all going though, the path was so dry and dead that with one car close ahead of us dirt was getting sprayed into the front of the car all the time, which the driver complained about a lot. But already we could see the house ahead of us, it wasn't too much too look at. Already three different cars where parked where near it, one clearly looking better then the other two. The house was a dark blue, a faded out one at that though by the sun. It was about the same length as a normal family home, but it was taller then most, if you fell off the top you'd surely die, that's what came to my five year old brain anyway, wondering how or if I could even ever get up to the top in the first place. There wasn't many windows to it's name and from the agle I was getting then, only one door and no porch. One thing to note was how all around the house the ground was just as dry as the road, no grass or rocks. But there was a large forest all around it of course, trees being all around the road so of course they came to the house too.  After the first car parked our car parked right beside it, maybe a little too close because when Eddie opened he's side of the car door he banged it agenst the body of the first car, making the driver of the first car turn he's head over to him. “Hey! Be more careful.” Immidetly Abe jumped out of the car and stood inbetween both cars and pulled Caleb out himself. “Be more careful where you park Mr Jasper!” Abe shot back, and after he put Caleb out of the way he gently grabbed me and lifted me up with ease, setting me down next to my older brother. For a 13 year old he had the hands and the strangth of a grown man. Then finally he gave he's twin and hand and guided her out, then after all three of use where in a pile and when back to the first car and picked up Eddie and carried him to us, like he used to do for me before Eddie came. By then both of the men had came out of the cars, Mr Jasper was immidetly walking to the house and supposidly looking though he's keys to find the main home one. The driver for my car, Mr Ender stood besides all of us and smiled, mainly at Eddie though but quitely stopped when he took a anouther glance at Abe. “Mhh, hey, since we're only staying here a week I got you all something.” Mr Ender said with one hand on he's hip like always. “What is it?” Abe asked numbly, he's thick eyebrows didn't help the unfriendly look he was giving the man. “I'll show you tonight kids! After dinner, you'll see.” He gave Eddie a wink before making a hand gesture to follow him to the house. Mr Ender was a larger man with warn yellow skin and orangish brown hair and rosy cheeks all the time. Out of all the fathers here I've seen he looked the most like a dad too, even more so when he smiled, quite he normally was doing. 

Finally by the time we got to the door, Mr Jasper got the front door open, looking like he was almost getting ready to scream. Mr Jasper was a very tall dark haired man, and if it wasn't for he's tired eyes he'd be so skinny and so thick haired, you'd think he was thwenty years younger then he actually is. But it was really he's eyes that gave it away, he looked like he'd seen every horrible thing there is to see, not really the kind of thing you'd exspect a garbade disposal man to have.  When he finally opened the door open for us, he didn't bother holding it for us as he started walking in already. The door lead right into the living room, and the first thing I noticed was that the room was painted in a light gray blue, more on a slight peurple side, and the main couch in the middle was a dark rich blue, and so where the two other chairs and matched it near by. And in the back of the room was a small TV. And Caleb when he saw it immiditaly ran over to it and sat down next to it, I following him laughing and nearly crashing into him in the process, Mr Ender laughing too as he watched. Beside us Becky toke over with holding Eddie as Abe took one last glance over to us, and gave a speical look over to Becky, signed and followed Mr Jasper, yelling back quickly. “Don't touch anything that isn't that TV ok?” Me and Caleb nodded as he walked out with Mr Jasper.

Becky sat down beside us and laid Eddie down at her feet as she sat Idien style. It took a while for Caleb to get the thing to work, after a few seonds the static ended, but it still seemed a little too black even when a British man came on screen talking about something boring. But it was still watchable. Like back at our old home Caleb always picked the channle. It didn't take too long for Caleb to realize that nothing to he's liking was on, everything on seemed like something a busy mother would passibley watch while she was doing work, not four bored children. Finally after staring at a cooking show for a few miniutes he turned it off and flopped over onto the ground and signed. "Caleb." Becky signed. "Wait till tommarow, in a hour the TV will go out anyway, at this time of day only adults will be watching." Caleb didn't say anything but he did make eye contact with and nodded, then went back to pouting. I pulled my legs tougether and stood up and started walking away from my siblings. “Where are you going?” Becky asked though I didn't look back as I started running. “I'm gonna find Abe!” She didn't seem to follow me as I ran out of the blue living room and into a long hallway, upstairs I could hear someone talking, and being sure it was my brother I turned my heel and started skipping up the stairs, my small black shoes making a clanging noise as I got to the top. The talking had ended but when I jumped up and grabbed hold of a bedroom door knob and thrown it open I hit a body of fabrik full force, immiditly almost falling backwards and just barely stayed up. “Debra!” My shoulders and arms went stiff as I looked up and saw miss Lois looking down at me.

Miss Lois, or Carry Lois was my father's only sibling and only living family left. She was only 46 but looked much longer, her face did show age, but her bloude curly hair, her full colorful orange skin, her young skin, said otherwise. She had a hard face too, and looked to be more stronge then other women too. She had no children of her own unlike her brother, but was married to a man around her age. Though he didn't come here with her, normally he followed her everywhere, I liked her husband a lot, but now I wasn't going to see him ever again. Miss Lois never liked me out of all my siblings, which was funny given we looked so simaler, my father used to say when she wasn't around that I was a mini Carry, my sir name is Carry actually, after her.

“Sorry Lois.” I said blankly, and I probably didn't sound all that sorry either. “Debra, where's your brother?” I throwned and made a hand motion telling her to go on and she signed with annoyance. “Abe! The twin.” “I don't know.” Again she signed and pushed me away from her and started walking down the stairs, and I followed her like a little clone. “Abe is talking to Mr Jasper.” She didn't anolage me as we went though a door next to the stairs. The new room didn't have blue painted walls like every other room seemed to have, it was all wood, it seemed to be a storage room with the only things in there I could understand was cabnits and shelves. And low and behold Abe and Mr Jasper where in the very back of the room, looking grim. And when they both saw us Mr Jasper shut what seemed to be a door on the floor? Then I wasn't sure on what it was, but Abe changed the mood quickly. “Lois!” He said with a fake smile. “I haven't seen you since the day after the funeral. Been weird not seeing you every Sunday. How are you?” Miss Lois walked closer and I followed, trying to hide behind her some so one one would tell me to leave, but Abe saw me and just gave me a quick wink before looking back up at Lois. “Better then you I'm sure of it. I have important news, you better tell your sister,” Then she looked over at Mr Jasper real quick. “You too, this is important.” Everyone stared at her like she was about to read off the death list. "Mr Envis has decided to come and take Debra back with him." Cold faced Mr Jasper turned human once more, a face I hardly ever saw and when I did he only saved it for the twins. My little hands grabbed onto Miss Lois's dress and she even looked down at me with a quick flash of pity, a small gasp coming from my lips. But, and this did come as a shook to m back then, probably even more so if I wasn't so afriad then, was that Abe didn't look scard too. He did seem suprised but not scard, he gave Lois a nod. "Why do you think he wants her now?" He looked at me with pity too, but it was a kind we could both share and understand. "He never wanted her before." It toke a momment for Miss Loise to respond, I couldn't see her face and the side of it was hidden by her fluffy hair. "I don't know, he's letter to me was simple and short, he's coming tommarow. He's letter came right before I was getting in the car, if I had known beforehand.." She shook her head and Abe's eyes changed and he's soulders lacked. "If your saying you'd take Deb, you can't hav-" "Your losing her regardless of what gets her Aberham, don't give me a speech." Like a truely higly thought of lady, Miss Lois turned on the tip of her pointed shoes and walked out with a high head, me letting go of her dress dejectly and watching her walk out as a dark hopeless dispare filled up inside me.

I stared at the door for a few seconds then turned to my brother. Abe was also looking at the door with a odd eminonless look in he's eyes, he's face seemed stiff too and it mimored Mr Jasper's face as well, the chin, black hair and face was all Abe got out of him so far. Abe looked down at me and gave me a tired mother's smile, picked me up in he's strong arms and bounched me once, the front of my bosy to he's shoulder, where I got a good look at Mr Jasper watching. My face trembled and my hands grabbed at Abe's blue jacket as my body shook. “Don't do that,” Abe said sternly, patting my back as we walked out of the room and into the hallway. “Don't cry now of all times, you didn't last week at the funeral.” I barried my face into he's soulder, but the last thing of I saw of Mr Jasper then was him looking at the floor and not following. 

I couldn't tell where Abe was carrying me, but I felt the bumps of he's walking on my face. I didn't see he's face of course but I was near sure it was a colder planning look, he'd get that a lot when bad news came. The sound of he's shoes hitting the floor stopped and so did the bumping, I held on tighter but he pilled me off of him with a loud pained sign, I was getting too big for him too do that, I was then probably the weight of someone he's age, people in our mom's side of the family, our family, where large tall people, with broud bones and large shoulders, even the women, though not quite in a manly way, more of a powerful way, like Miss Lois. That was what a Lois was like, witch was the only name we all shared.  We where all back in the living room, Abe held my hand as he looked down at Becky, Caleb and Eddie. Caleb was watching some news now, why he'd even bother in the world of stock markets in beyond me. And Eddie was asleep on Becky, and she looked up at Abe. “Are you going to take us to our room now or what?” Abe nodded, but added. “Where's Mr Ender?” “I don't know, said something about he's car. I didn't want to bother him by asking.” Abe nodded at her awnser, then gently lifted Eddie away from he's twin, held him up with one arm and with the other hand held onto me. Becky and Caleb got up, Becky made too hold Caleb's hand but Abe gave her a odd look I didn't understand, and she looked soured and put both her hands behind her back. Then tougether we all walked out of the blue living room, into the blue hallway, up the blue stairs, into the long upstairs blue hallway with all the bedrooms and a bathroom, and Abe stood in front of the white door, letting Eddie down so he could open the bedroom door for us, pushing me and Eddie in lightly.

Like seemingly every other room in this house (but that brown wooden one Abe and Mr Jasper where in.) This one was a blue. But the shade this time was such a light one I barely saw it as blue and more of a greyish white. The room looked more peronilized then the others, it looked like it would have been made for a teenage girl around Becky's age, though the girl this room was made for was probably less of a plain person then our loved Becky. It had a writer's air and showed many dead, probably once beautful things. Mainly the dried flowers next to the large purpleish desk, rapped up like they where a conffion of love to someone. There was a empty bird cage next to the large bared window, and I had to run up to it and tip toe to make sure that it was empty, and there wasn't any long gone dead bird inside, with little bone parts here and there, the only reconizable part being half of a eye socet and skull left, and one outstreacted wing with no remints of feathers. Next to the writeing desk was a mirror that seemed oddly fancy for the rest of this house. The bed too, looked very well made. The dark green earthy colored blanket thrown over it like someone had jumped out of bed and not fixed it, and jedgeing by the still presant dust clearly on top of it, it looked like the female owner never came back.

I was still staring at, wondering what the most epic and bewildering ways where to die around a forest like this would be, when unromaticly Abe walked over to the bed, grabbed the dark green blanket and shook it up and down a few times, then he laid it back on the bed and smiled at me. I didn't smile back at him, more so I pouted and crossed my arms, I don't know how he reacted to that but he left me alone anyway, starting a conversaion with Caleb. In hign sight, the dust was probably only two weeks old from when Miss Lois was at the house cleaning it up all by herself. Never let it be said that she can't work, she's got tired bones for her age, and God has be good to her body in return. But anyway, in my mind the dust looked like it was a decade old. Little charms like that in your seeing of the world are lost a while after 8.

I culimed onto the bed, and took off my little black shoes and white socks by the bed. I didn't get under the blanket, all I did was admire it. It's shade was so dark, and so green. It was truly beautful. I didn't even like the color green back then, only having a eye for pinks and reds, no more though, no more. 

After a moment turned my attension away from the blanket and saw that Eddie was trying to climb onto the bed, I reached and pulled him up into my arms then left him lose on the bed with me. The bed was so tall it was hard me for me to get up here, let alone a small child like Eddie, most 5 year olds couldn't get there hands on the top, but Eddie could like most people in the Losi family surely could by that age. He looked in ah at everything, then stared at me and said. “I like it up here!” Then he began jumping on he's knees and soon I followed him, forgeting the tender feeling I had toward the blanket. The bed apprently wasn't too good for jumping, or maybe moving in gernal, feeling so hard and stiff, this was the kind of bed that would kill a older man's back every night and he'd let it too. I looked over to where the older of us where, and saw Becky's watchful eyes glance back at us, and intusally I stopped (Eddie didn't of couse) but she made no move to get in our way, just conturuded listening to her brothers. Wasn't very like her, back at our small home she would always tell us not to treat what you own poorly, because there where so many people in the world that would want what you have. But she didn't stop us now, maybe it was because we didn't own this? Or because we would only staying here a week? Still when I stopped jumping, and Eddie kept on going yelling here and there “It's the size of a sports field!” or “Only a gaint could sleep in this!” I watched the older kids. “We haven't told you all the details yet because we wanted all you little ones to know at once.” Becky said. “I'm not a little one,” Said Caleb, looking a little red faced. “I'm only a year younger then you two, I'm a Irish twin remember?” What he meant by Irish twin, was that two siblings that where born within a year's time, and Caleb was just in that time slot. Maybe it was because he was a lot shorter then the twins they saw him like that. They used to treat him like a ecual. “It isn't a big deal, we'll tell everyone now ok?” Becky said, Abe nodding with her and Caleb signing. They all walked over to the green bed, Becky sliding on besides me and Eddie, plucking Eddie out of the air and setting him on her lap. Caleb acwardly moved in and set to the left hand side of the bed. While Abe put one leg and side of he's body on the edge of the bed, looking down at all of us. “Ok, Deb, Eddie.” Abe waved he's hand over to Caleb. “Caleb, you know how before we went on the car trip after mom and dad died, me and Becky told you all not to worry about where we would all end up, and who'd stay with who?” I nodded, holding onto every word, Caleb gave a tern nod, and Eddie looked at him in wonder. Abe paused, giving he's words a second to cook then went on. “Well, you know cousin Mathew? The one that lives in Texas?” I shook my head no, Caleb said yes and Eddie didn't say anything. “Well, right after mom and dad died I written a letter to him saying we needed a place to live, and that we didn't want to be apart, and right before we left on the long car trip, a day before, I got a letter back saying that if we come to he's town of Mell-Tunnel, then we can live with him if me and Becky get jobs.” Abe's smile brightened as Becky went on for him after a anouther pause. “All we have to do is get there on our own with no one knowing where we're going.” Then she turned Eddie to face her, but looked both me and Caleb, mainly me in the eyes. “But no one can know about us leaving, no one at all, not even Miss Lois. If they do they'll stop us and seprate us.” I nodded, Caleb said nothing and so did Eddie. “But,” Abe contuded, “you know how we're all leaving in a week, to go with our 'fathers', well we can't stay that long, but me and Becky have decided that we should all stay for 3 more days, starting tommarow. And on the night of the 3 day when everyone has gone to sleep, we'll all leave. By then me and Becky will have worked out more of what we'll do from there, but in between then we both want you 3 too spend time with your fathers and our ante.” Right after he finished, without even thinking on it I said. “Why?” Abe turned over to me and made a few sounds with he's mouth, before Becky helped him. “Because, well, it's going to be a long long time till we'll all be adults, and by the time we can all see Miss Lois again it will be a different decade probaby. And a lot can happen in that time.” I turned my head to the side and stared at her, but she finished with a. “You'll understand someone Deb. Really.” And didn't go on. Why do they never tell us anything? They must think I'm pretty dumb. I'm not a baby like Eddie is. At least that's what I had in my mind at that time.

 “Well,” Abe added a second later like a old man, so pretty normal for him. “let's try and relax for a while before someone, who knows who, calls us down.” Abe moved in closer too the bed, and laid next to Caleb, much too Caleb's dislikeing. And Becky too laid with Eddie beside her, signing quitely and rudding her knees with her now finely free hands, not holding Eddie anymore. Caleb moved over to the edge of the bed and slide off, standing next to me when I got off too. I looked down at the edge of the bed where I just was, then looked back over too Caleb, and he starred back at me with a equally numb look on he's face. I saw he's mouth open but before words came out Eddie hoped off the bed and stared walking around the bed and then over to me, pulling on my hand trying to get me to follow. “What?” I said more cold then I meant too. He didn't pick up on that, and kept on pulling with a annyoed facial exspression. “I wanna go back to the TV!” “Ed you dult, the shows would be off by now, it's dark!” I said back, pulling my hand away from him and placing them on my flat hips. “I don't like this room!” When I didn't move he just signed loudly and then decided to switch tatics and grabbed a hole of my dress instead. Becky looked up at us a little more, and was going to say something, but Abe interubted her. “You can't go out till someone calls us down, you don't want to be a bother do you?” Eddie turned around and suddenly looked hurt by that. “I'm not a bother!” “Well you are too them, that's for sure” Caleb awnsered, I glaced, not knowing just who the 'them' was. Abe frowned at Caleb, giving him a warning look, then turned back to Eddie, himself still laying down. “Your not a bother Eddie, not to me.” He quickly added a smile, then laid back down. Caleb signed, grabbed Eddie's hand and walked him over to the writing desk, Caleb then sat down in the desk chair facing the mirorr, letting Eddie lose to do whatever he wanted. Eddie almost looked sad sitting next to the desk chair, not even bored or upset, just sad. Walking past them I stood infront of the window, it didn't look out much, this was the first and only story in the building. It being dark didn't help either. What I did see was the gravel edgeing the woods around the house, and the very dark, very thinned treed forest. The forest we'd be going through in 3 days apprently. I guess I should have been surprised, but I always known the twins wouldn't let us be appart, for a second, when Miss Lois said my boilogial father did want to claim me, I felt a momment's worry that they wouldn't need me. They had their twin, and heck, it wasn't like I was even that speical really, Caleb was the third oldest and looked the most like are real parents, our real real parents. We may not have been blood, but father said if it wasn't for the fact he known he couldn't have children, he would have been sure that he was he's son. Caleb looked so much like him it wasn't even funny. Mainly with he's thick eyebrows and skinny legs, he was named after father too, Caleb the second. Better then a Carry if you ask me.  

I turned over to the window again and stared out at the darkness. My mind drifted off into what we all used to be, less then a month ago we where the perfect odd family. My mother, Becky Lois, was a very laid back women all in all. It wasn't that she was lazy, just that she didn't feel a need to do something that wasn't important or she didn't want to add any unessary things into our lives, so no pets or long trips. But that didn't seem to be the case when it came to children, or maybe she just really thought of us as a nessary. Then again, maybe dad was the one who thought of us like that. It wasn't that mother didn't love us, no not at all, we where her favorite little people in the hole world, and she would have gone though Hell and back for us. But we just we'rent her world. But too dad, out real father, we all where. He once told us if mother could have had more children, he would have wanted as many as she could have ever had, because the world needed more people like us in it. Anyway that's what he said. But mom couldn't have anymore, they where both already in their late 30s by the time they had the twins, which was really bad. And mom seeing Eddie almost die was the last straw for her, and dad understood. Dad couldn't have children, I didn't think much of it at the time but he was a very unheathly looking man, and he probably wouldn't have lived past he's 50s, some of he's sickness was from the navy, but most of it was unknown, most Lois men aren't like that at all. But, and she never told me this but she did tell the twins once so this is how I know, but father was so upset when he learned he couldn't have babies he wouldn't he for days at a time, and got even sicker. So mother found other men that could, men that could father a child but also didn't want anything to do with their children. Dad was fine with this, though he really seemed to get too angery when us kids would get birthday and Christmas gifts from those men, apparently mom didn't look hard enough, because there was also a tiny little bit of care most of those men had to us. Mainly Eddie's father, Mr Ender. He tried to come to our house to see him so many times father one day wanted to walk out with a shot gun, but of course mom wouldn't let him. Really Mr Ender was like a uncle to all of us, and though he tried not to act like a father to Eddie, he was always there for him when he could. Mr Ender, had one son before Eddie, with he's late wife, but he's son died at 18 in battle overseas, and I don't know what happened to he's wife, he never talks about her. He's first son died a month after Eddie was born actually. Besides my biological father, Mr Ender is the only one of the fathers to have any other kids. But my father, Mr Envis, is different from any of the other fathers. The twins and Caleb's just didn't seem to care, mine hated me, he down right hates me. He had 6 other children before me, 3 left, two of the dead ones killed themselves, which doesn't suprise me, not that I understood that back then anyway. The other one died in WW2, I think of the two that killed themselves was also a soilder, but did live past the war. He's only 3 living children are women, and not only that but women he hates, women that went off to marry men he didn't like. Actually it was him that came up to my mother, knowing that she had 3 children up to that point from other men, offering to be the father to her next, and in excage he'd leave he's inharedance to me and the family. The deal is still up, he doesn't hate me that much, but the only thing I had to do was not get marry up until he dies, or if I do he has to approve of him first. Which given right now he's in he's 60s, I was deffintly not worried about that sort of thing. My father, Mr Envis, wasn't a rich man, not in a big mansion with lots of servants kind of way. But he was defunitly upper middle class, actually he has a long very intresting family history, but that's not important now, though a quick version is that he's parents are the real deal kind of rich, mansion servants and all, and he was the first son and hire too it all, but much like he's daughters he's have this the woman, he married a beautul, smart, chaming, Godly humble woman, who just so happened to be Irish. And so he wasn't allowed any of that many. But him and her made it on their own, in first by the time Mr Envis was in he's 30s he made a name all by himself out of the north and into the mid-west. He's wife died after having their last child, but he was able to keep on going. And even though he's daugthers will not be getting any of he's innharednce, he does make sure their husbands are giving them what they need, basics wise, he doesn't hate them per-say. But at that age I was sure he hated me. He never gave me any gifts for my birthdays or Christmas, he never smiled at me. And the one and only time I tried to run up to him and hug him when I was 6, he hit me across the face like I was a annoying dog. I held a grude pretty well. Caleb's dad was the best one, because he never hated he's son, or loved him. He just left us alone with the parents we loved. But when he heard that Caleb's parents died, he written us back that he'd take him in. Mr Paster wasn't a very pretty man to say the least, I mean, Mr Ender was a bigger man, but he looked put tougether, like God meant him too be fat. Mr Paster, not so much. And he was buold too, and the few times I've seen him, tired looking too. But to be honest I know little about him, all I known then was that he had no wife or children, he used to be a miner in West Virginia, but once he got sick he had too quite, at least he still has a honest job today. That's all I know about him, I'd take him over mine anyday, thank God the twins aren't going to leave me, thank God I was once loved by my parents, better then never being. Mr Jasper was Abe's and Becky's father, and he looked a lot like them, to the point of it being funny. He had long thin legs and boney little knees and arms. He's face was long and sickly looking, he had small eyes with sockingly bright green eyes. He's hair was thick and with pulled back black hair, black as in black, no hint of brown to be seen, more blue then anything. The twins had he's figure and hair, long faces too. Becky's legs and arms really looked like Mr Jasper's, she kind of looked like a female 13 version on him. But Abe, though (at least for now) he had a thinner legs and stomach,but he's soulders where strong and large, it made him look 4 years older. He got that from he's grandfather, from mom's dad. He was a beast of a man, and it made mom very happy something from her was in him, something dad never got of course. Nither Abe nor Becky had Mr Jasper's small eyes, and gernal creepyness (for now!) but they did have he's eye color, and that was about it (again, for now) Mr Jasper, like Mr Paster, I didn't know much about. He was a little more in the twin's lives then Caleb's dad was, he didn't show up much, but he wrote the twins two speprate letters every week or so since they could write, he never called though, in fact I think he may have hated modern tecnolagy overall, I'm not sure. He's car did seem a little old compared to other ones I've seen. But that's about all I know, he's a overall very well dressed man who seems respectalbe. But he never really showed me any reason to think much of him, beyond the overall mystery of him. But honstly though, these men never meant anything to us till now. It was very odd, the life setup we had growing up till now, and I wish it could have lasted longer. But really we where a very normal family overall. Dad had a normal job, mom stayed home and took care of most things, us kids went to school and we where all ok at it. We went to Chruch, we where well liked. And despite everyone knowing what was going on and didn't normally approve of it, they still treated us like any of band of siblings, but that's all we where now, no more friends or family now. Mom didn't have a family besides her dad, and he died two years ago. Dad's family didn't like him anymore beyond he's sister and brother in law. And she was sure sending us to our 'real dads' was the right thing to do, anyway that's what she thought.

Abe Lois Jasper

Becky Lois Jasper

Caleb Ruckas Lois Paster

Debbie Carry Lois Envis

Eddie Lois Ender

that's who we where anyway, but we never used any of those extra long names, he had longer names then any other kids in school. Abe said we where all Lois's and that's what we would call ourselves, the Lois kids. I never felt any closeness to the Envis in my name, and like Abe told me too do, in my school notes, and journals and my notes, I wrote down Deb Lois, and that's what I wanted people to call me and see me as. Even if we all looked very different, and it showed too, in our hair and faces mainly but hair more clearly. Eddie with the darkish orangish yellow hair, mine paule yellow, Caleb yellow hair with strikes of very early white hairs here and there, and the twins with their raven black. We all went by Lois anyway, didn't make any diffrance too us, so why should it too you?

CHAPTER 2

Apparently I fell asleep on Becky's left leg, because my head jerked me awake and flopped back onto the bed when she quickly pulled it back after a loud noise came from somewhere in the house. “Oh I'm sorry!” She cried, looking down at me. I didn't say anything, I just shut my eyes and grumbled. Around me I heard my siblings moving around me and getting up, I felt a big weight jump off the bed which was surely Abe. I slowly slid off the bed and rubbed my eyes, looking around apparently Abe was holding Eddie who was still asleep, until Becky toke him from he's arms and into hers. Caleb was the only one that looked fully there, I probably didn't look too hot either. “Come on, follow me.” Abe said grogoly, then quickly turned around faster then a person who just woke up normally could and harshly wispered. “Don't tell anyone, remember?” He only looked at me, so I was the only one that said yes and nodded. He nodded back and opened the door for all of us, guiding us through the blue hallway, down the blue stairs, and through the blue door and into a room I haven't been in before, it wasn't the room with the TV, this was a bigger room with a somewhat big table, a square table that had very fine wooden chairs all around it, at the time it looked a lot more fancy too me then it really was. The wooden chair where probably not oke like my brain thought, and the table was probably wood too just to save money, I know a lot more about intereer design now. The walls where of course, blue. I can nearly promise you the person who made this house would have died if he didn't see blue every few miniutes. Though this blue was a much darker shade, the floor was carpet, a dark gray one, which didn't give his a very friendly vibe overall. There was two windows in the back of the room starring at the table and the few people around it right now. Miss Lois was setting up the plates, and when we all walked in and saw her doing that Abe tapped on mine and Caleb's arm and wispered, “Eat very slowly and don't complain, please.” I nodded and Caleb just starred back at him. The other two people in the room where Mr Jasper and Mr Paster. Mr Jasper looked over to the twins and nodded, then looked back over the the table. Mr Paster just watched and listened to Miss Lois talk. She was just talking about cooking meats and cooking in gerneral, when she saw Abe push us into the room and we started slowing walking when she turned around and her now pulled back bouncy hair flipped to one side when she looked at us. “Hey, for those of you with your fathers there, sit next to them, and those with them not here, just sit on a chair with no one next to it.” She turned back to what she was doing and kept on talking about pork. My big eyes looked up at Abe, and he was starring at he's twin, when he met my eyes and changed he's facial exspression to more confedante. “Don't worry, just sit next to Eddie at the very left end of the table.” He said quitely. Becky walked me away from the group, sat Eddie down on the second to last chair on the left side, and me to the third last chair on the left side of the table, gave us a wink then met with her twin next to Mr Jasper and they started chatting. Caleb of course sat next to Mr Paster, they didn't even look at each other of course, it was in fact so akward that I couldn't look over at them for a second longer then I already had. Eddie stared waking up fully, he turned over to me and said in a small voice. “What's happening?” I smiled at him and said. “We're going to be eating soon I think? I'm not sure Eddie.” I shrugged. He turned over to the table and pouted, connecting both of he's little fists onto the table like he was getting ready to cry for something. “Don't start that! After dinner we can take a bath, you'd like that right?” Eddie normally liked baths well enough, and that did get him to stop and think. “I guess that would be nice, when is the food coming?” “As soon as I do!” We both turend our attension over too the man that had just came into the room, it was Mr Ender, and of course he jumped into the last chair on the left side of the table, and grabbed Eddie by the shoulder to make him look at him. It didn't accour to me at the time, but Eddie always looked at Mr Ender with a blank look in he's eyes, not bothered or happy or angery, just nothing. Which was surely not a look a father would want to see in their child's eyes. But regardless Mr Ender smiled brightly hoping to get the smile he so very much wanted, and went on talking. “I'd never thought I'd see you two away from the rest...” Then he looked around the table and saw where everyone else was sat, then it clicked. “Oh, well don't worry Debbie.” He looked down at me and he's eyes sqinted like a China man's. “You can sit next to me and Eddie, I don't mind at all.” I looked down at the table and put my chin in my left hand as he went on about nothing. “Your really going to like what I've made for you. Now I know having a bedroom in the attic may not sound very fun, but I really fixed it up. Now I couldn't paint the walls because the wood is very old, but I got a blue carpet, now it's a bright blue you'll like it. And I got a big bed, now I haven't bought the sheet for it yet, I wanted to know what color you'd like it too be. Now last year your favorite color was red right? Do you want red?” Eddie nodded and Mr Ender ruffed he's orange hair. “Great, not sure where I'll find one, but I will! I already got you two blankets, one's white so that isn't very fun, but the other is a bright green, you'll like it trust me.” Eddie nodded, and I turned over slightly too look at Mr Ender go on about what he was doing for him, I felt something about that, just wasn't sure what then. “I didn't buy any toys or anything, because I heard after I bring you home your ante will send your toys back too you, and the attic is really small, sorry. But if you'll be really careful, I'll let you play with your half brother's old old toys. It's not like I'm going to anytime soon.” He laughed in a odd manor. “Your letting me play with Caleb's toys?” Mr Ender eyebrow's dropped and he looked at him oddly for a second with he's mouth open, then shook he's head and made a dry laugh. “No no no, your other half brother, the one you never met.” Eddie looked very confused, and I wished Becky was there too help, I looked around me then hesetendly tapped Eddie's soulder. “Don't you remember Eddie? Mr Ender had a son before you?” Eddie still looked lost. I'd known he heard he had one before, he just must not be albe to remember now. Mr Ender shook he's head again and quickly said. “Forget it, it's not important.” The man leaned back into he's chair and Eddie looked back at he's hands, we all stayed quite after that for a moment waiting. We stayed like that for a while till suddenly I looked down below me and right there Miss Lois had placed a plate of food in front of me and the boys, Mr Ender smiled down at the food and seemingly gained a lot of healthness and joy. “Thanks!” She nodded then went back to the counter to grab more for everyone else. Me and Mr Ender got green beans and pork, Eddie just got green beans apprently. He didn't say anything but he did make a face when he started eating, Mr Ender asked if he wanted any of he's meat, and he shook he's head. It was good food, wasn't horrible at all, but it wasn't amazing either. Maybe food would taste better or worse depending on where you eat it at, and the people you eat it with. There isn't much to say, we all ate quitely, like Eddie Miss Lois only ate green beans and little at that, she kept glancing my way every now and then. After we all got done she took our plates away and Becky came to help her finish up too. Afterwards everyone got a little more chatty, even Caleb and he's 'dad' strarted chatting now. There was a loud loud bang in the back of the house, and we all turned over to the door to the dinner room. I heard a little “Oh,” from Mr Ender when my dad came in.

When I saw Mr Envis walk though the door, as tall as he ever was, I immiditly turned my head away quickly and starred at the table like the rest of the night. For some reason I felt the need to grab Eddie's hand, he didn't stop me from doing so, in fact he made a few wimpering noises, and Mr Ender patted Eddie's back, for once not saying anything. In fact the only person that did was Miss Lois. “Mr Envis, I thought you where't coming today.” “Well I did, coming tommarow evening didn't go as I planned.” “Well,” Lois turned back to the counter top, not soundsing too happy too see him, and didn't really hide it either. They both where outwardly honest people, which was what made them unlikeable in some ways. Really they should have been family, if it wasn't for the fact they look nothing alike. “I didn't make food for you, so you'll only get leftovers. It's late I will not be making anything else.” “That's not a issue, I want to be taken to where I'll be sleeping for tonight.” “Your not hungery?” Mr Ender asked, no good cheer, though gunuine wonder in he's voice. “Did I say I was?” Mr Envis stated, without even looking he's way, Mr Ender didn't say anything back, but did give me a quick sad glance. “Well then,” Miss Lois said signing. “I'll show you your room the-” “I want the oldest child to show me.” Miss Lois glanced back at him, giving him a oddly nasty face. Becky and Abe looked at each other confused, then Mr Envis signed like they where the most ingorant people in the world. “The son of course.” Abe watched him a second, then stood up, but right when he did Lois quickly adding. “Sit down boy, I'll show him.” She glanced over to my 'father'. “It makes no diffrance.” “No.” Abe rasied he's hand, standing very stright and looking right at her. “I'll show him, your right it makes no diffrance, so I should do it while you clean with Becky.” Becky still stood near the counter with Miss Lois, juding by how her legs stood so close tougther, and how her shoulders sunch and her eyes watched Abe sadly. Abe easyly with no more verbal complate from anyone walked out of the room with Mr Envis, too us he was a man on death row walking toward the rope. My love and aderashion for him felt never-ending right there and then. “Oh Lord,” Miss Lois signed, rubbing her head with one hand. “That man is going to give him Hell.”

When the four of us walked back upstairs, we heard some talking in one of the bedrooms but didn't stick around to hear more of it. When we all got into our shared bedroom we still could hear a little noise, but nothing any of us could make out really. Becky tried but heard little. We waited and waited for a long time for Abe to come back, Eddie was the only one that fell asleep of course, he didn't seem to mind the absance of he's oldest brother like we all did. No one else fell asleep though, we all waiting around very triedly. I think I was basically asleep, resting my head agesnt the side of the bed, when the door to our bedroom opened. In came Abe, looking very tired with he's soulder's and head low when he  walked in and shut the door. He smiled at me when I ran to he's legs and held on he smiled down at me, I didn't see it though because my face was pressed up agesnt he's leg. In fact I was getting a little too big for that, because how tall I was for my age, given my face was right up agenst he's hip, but he was so tall and large it didn't seem weird to me. “Hey.” He said lamely, then he pulled the annoying child, AKA me, off he's leg then flopped down on the bed next to Caleb and soon Becky when she laid Eddie down on the pillow next to him, and she sat down on the bed. “So, what happened?” I climbed onto the green bed and snugged inbetween Caleb's chest and Abe's legs. “I'll tell you in a few hours when the sun comes up, I'm tired sissy.” Becky shrugged then got out of the bed, not being able to sit down and stared pacing the room. The only reason I could tell was about I could hear the tapping of her shoeless feet hitting the floor. I didn't want to move my face away from the warmth, and like the others I completty forgot to change clothes, or wash up or to even put a blanket over ourselves. I just feel asleep in a sea of green, the last time I ever would.

Imagine having to wake up four large pigs all sleeping next to each other, well Becky could have a idea for what that was like. In fact come to think of it, she had been waking us up for a long while now when mom was busy. I'm not sure when most of us but Eddie was up, but I do know when Becky said in a quite tone, “Get up, you all need to wash up before anyone sees you slept like that, mainly you Deb.” And she poked me in the stomach when she said that, I laughed one second the went back to giving her a bad look like we always did when she woke us up. But it did work, and I was the first one to slide off the bed, it felt like falling in the breff second my butt was off the bed but my feet didn't hit the floor, I was fine, but it did scare the crap out of poor Caleb and Abe when I yelled in tired girlish shook. Before facing their annoyed complaining I ran too the door, had a hard time opening it quickly because of my small size, then had into the hallway and hit a dead stop. I didn't know where the bathroom was at all. So my pose changed a good deal, with one hand behind my back and the other open and out there ready to grab any doornobs in my path, and the legs close tougether. I checked the door to our left, it was locked so it was probably a bedroom. I checked the one to the far left next to the bigish window in the hall, it wasn't locked but when I opened it I saw a bed and a large pare of feet boulding out of the blankets, so I quickly (but of course) not so quitely shut the door out of fear it was Mr  Envis's bedroom. And I swear to this day I heard a man scoff in there.  I skipped away from those useless doors to me, and went right along to the one to the right, it was locked of course, with hopefully no scary old man inside. But when I opened the door to the door on the far right, it opened, and inside was thankfully a bathroom, wasn't a great one, in fact the tub looked like it came from a few decades ago, or as I thought of them then ache days. And so did the sink, with the poll connecting it too the the ground being rather thin. Really it looked like any bathroom I'd see anywhere then, but it was odd like touges that made it old looking to me. Maybe it was the small little cartains with a light green backdrop and pink flowers on it, covering the window behind it, really the cartains where to small for the window. The fact someone felt the need to put a window in a bathroom kind of proved it too me this place was old. In fact, come to think of it, there where't any lights in our bedroom, we just stayed in the dark the hole time, there where some in the living room and dinner room, but not our bedroom! Gosh I'd need to look over that place again and see it better. Next to the tub was a circul miorre so anyone that was tall enough could look at themselves naked, which seemed funny to me. Anyway, I took off my clothes then got into the tub. The water was up to my hips when Becky came in with the stuff I forgot to bring. Two towels, a brush and new clothes for the both of us. I just laid my clothes on the ground but she picked them up and laid them inside the dirty clothes basket, it had a little door on the top of it, I bet Eddie could fit in there if he tried. While Becky waited for me to get done, and she did trust me to wash myself. She brushed her long black hair. Since the miorr was next to the tub and she wanted to give me some privacy she couldn't watch herself do it like she used to back at home. “Do a good job ok Deb? This may be the last time you'll be able to wash up fully ok?” I nodded but did turn to look at her. “But Abe said we'd stay here for a little while. Can't I just bath again right before we leave?” Becky opened her mouth like she was going to go on a long exsplasion, but shut it and shook her head instead. “You'll see, don't worry about it none for now.” I didn't comment on it anymore. When the water drained and Becky handed me a towel, that's when I had to do most of the rubbing the dead skin off myself because I had nothing but my little fingers till then. I dryed off fairly quick, but before I started putting on my clothes Becky helped dry my hair because it was getting longer and I wasn't used to that. Mom always said I looked best with short hair, and she was just going to get my hair cut at a barber's a few days before she died. So my hair was longer then it had ever been, like how I always wanted it, Abe and Becky said I was allowed too even though mom would have wanted it short, they said something like I needed something new and happy in my life, and the longer hair was a nice pleaure I never really had. I couldn't wait till it hit my shoulders, I wanted it too grow longer then Becky's and go all the way to my hips! Gosh, there where even times Caleb had longer hair then me, but then again he had hair as thick as liver eating Johnson. We couldn't bring that much clothes with us, or anything for that matter. So the only 3 outfits I could bring where my best, in fact this was my best blue Chruch dress. It had a thin dark blue ribben bow at the light green collor, and the shirt was short and fluffy. Becky insisted that I wear my least good shoes with the dress though, “Because they'll hurt less if you walk in them for a long time, trust me.” I nodded though I didn't get it. Becky bathed quickly, she didn't have much time to work on her hair because she was just so quick. After she got dressed in a simple yellow dress and long white socks. When we both got out the boys, Abe and Caleb where waiting outside, Abe wispered something to Becky as we walked by, and we went down the stairs and into the living room with the TV. Becky sat next to be on the big chair facing the TV, before we both sat down for good I walked over to the TV, I found a channel that had some kind of western on, I wasn't into it but surely if I wanted to watch anything else Caleb would surely come down when he was done and want to find a western on. When I got back into the chair with Becky, she started brushing my hair while we talked. “If Miss Lois hasn't made any food for us after Abe and Caleb come down, then I'll make the breakfast. Is there anything you want? It may be the last time we have a cooked meal for a month or so.” I jerked my head really hard trying to look at her, “A month? That's so long!” Becky shrugged. “It'll go by faster then you think. I just, you'll see.” I throwned looking down. “If you want to know what's going on before Abe gets hear, we're probably leaving tonight. And walking from Pennsylvania too Texas is a long long walk Deb. It's not going to be easy, or fun even. Abe says he has ideas on ways to make us walk less, he still has a little money saved up from our old home, and he says he's going to sell all he's clothes but the one's on he's back, so hopefully we can get a few rides to diffrant check points, he even brought up the idea of going on a train for the first part, but I'm not sure about that.” I looked up at her as she let go of my hair, surely my face had a lost look on it. One side of her mouth moved like while the other moved down, and she signed. “It'll be fine.” She got very close to me and wispered. “We should stop talking about it here, later in our bedroom ok?” I nodded at her. Becky went on brushing my hair, while I watched the TV, I think it was they died with their boots on, quite is probably why it was too boring to me. I don't like real life stories, weather it ends well or not. I just don't like a sad story, that movie ended fine, but of course, given the name, there was a lot of death, and that made me upset, if it wasn't for Becky being right next to me, I would have cried, but I wanted to look adult.

When Abe and Caleb came down, Abe was holding Eddie's hand as they came in. “Hey, we're all done.” Abe said as Caleb sat in front of the TV and turned the voulme up and he looked back at me. “What happened so far? I don't know if I've seen this one yet.” I shrugged, frowing my brow. “I haven't really been watching it. It's a military movie. Think it's based off some real person's life?” Caleb nodded and turned back to the movie as the twins talked, Eddie sat next to him looking bored. “I told Caleb where going tonight.” Becky laughed a little dryly. “Well that's good, because I just told Deb everything.” Caleb still payed no attension, just starring at the TV like usual, while I on the other hand was paying very close attension. “Then there's nothing more to say here, let's get something to eat before heading out then?” I looked at him derectly. “We're leaving now!?” Abe stared at me confused like. “Ah, well after we eat yes. There's no reason to stay any longer.” My face must have looked unsure, because he's face sowured some. “What?” “Mhh, well what about Mr Ender? Isn't he not going to see Eddie for a long while?” Abe shrugged. “Eddie isn't really he's son anyway, he's not family. But Eddie is part of our family and so we're the ones who get to say who does and who doesn't get to see him.” My head turned to the side, and my face surely copied he's. “But can't he just til night time?” Abe shook he's head, and Becky steped in front of her brother to look at me. “Last night Mr Envis said he was taking you before it got dark, so we have to go now, as soon as possible, you understand?” In a moment my compasion for Eddie's biological father was snuped in a second, and I wanted out of that house right then and there. “Oh..” was all that I said, Abe nodded then looked over to the TV kid. “Did you hear any of that Caleb?” Caleb looked over to him and awnsered. “We're leaving after we eat? Yeah.” the twins both crigned. “Not so loud Caleb please.” Becky wispered, and Caleb shrugged then looked back to the screen, till Abe toke a step over to him and put a hand on he's shoulder. “We're eating now, come on, haven't you seen this one before anyway?” “No.” Caleb said flatly. “Well they all look the same too me. Come on.”

Miss lois did come into the kicten soon after our talk, but by then Becky was already making breakfast for all of us, so she just sat down by the table and waited quitely, not really making any talk with any of us but Abe here and there, she very much so looked like a queen in the mornings. Sure you could tell she hadn't put on her best clothes given she was still in a robe, and I still remember that she bathed at night not in the mornings, but her hair was perfect, her eyes didn't seem tired or weary. Her face didn't sag at all. She still looked perfect for her age. I bet she didn't even have time to brush her hair much, she probably just doesn't toss and turn at all at night, how can you have so much self control when your asleep? For all of her coldness, she was a very impresive woman alright. Becky made us all, including Miss Lois (though she only did hers as well because she didn't want to make her spishise.) a very big meal, and a warm one at that. Miss Lois didn't question it, though she only ate half of the meal before standing up from her chair. “I'm full, I'll give the rest too Mr Ender's dog but tha-” “wait!” Abe reached out he's hand to her plate, almost taking it away from her without thinking. “Wasting food is a sin ya know, Caleb and Deb can eat the rest right?” He looked over to the two of us, like a demand not a question, so I quickly said yes please, while Caleb only nodded. Miss Lois looked at Abe a second, and for a second Abe had worry in he's green eyes. But Miss Lois shook her head a little then gave him the plate, walking out of the room before saying in Becky's general derecion. “Thank you for the food Becky. “ In a very formal, yet genuen way then leaving. Becky looked over to her twin for a moment, shrugged then finally after all her preparing the food work was done, eating her off her own plate. She'd have to go fast, because the second she got done she'll have to wash up the plates and probably Eddie too knowing him. Abe looked over to us middle kids then said. “Welp,” he laid the hald eaten plate of food on the table, then slid the plate across the table all the way over to our side where Caleb catch it as it got near. “I know you two are probably full, but I'm sure you can both split it up.” It was good food, but man I didn't feel like it. My mind was a little cautch on that dog comment from Miss Lois. I didn't know Mr Ender had a dog, or that one was around here. I never liked dogs though, they scared me a lot back then anyway, it's a funny thought now though. I barely nibbled at the new plate of food, leaving almost all of it too Caleb of which he was fine with that. I didn't really want to share a plate with him anyway. So since I had something else better to do, I helped out sis by taking Eddie upstairs and washed him up. He was a pretty good at not getting into things like some other kids, but that didn't mean he wasn't messy at all. And for some odd reason he felt the need to jump up and down after I washed him before I could dry him. After all of that mess, I walked down the stairs and back into the hitcen, but everyone was gone so apparently I was up there too long. Becky and Caleb where in the living room, Becky was sitting on the chair there and Caleb was back to watching TV like before we ate, he must have eaten so much that he looked fat now, well I kinda did look fat right now too. Eddie ran away from my arms and jumped into Becky's lap and looked into her eyes while yelling. “Shouldn't you be at school now?!” Becky's ears clearly hurt by the way her face scrunched up. But soon she smiled back at him, and with him on her lap for once they where at a face to face level. “No, I'm not going to school for a while, none of us are for a while.” “But I thought I'd be starting school this year Becky..” Becky shrugged and started petting Eddie's hair, Eddie leaned into her hand as she spoke. “Maybe next year Eddie. By the next summer I promise you'll be in school.” He made a bad face, and Becky laughed in a sad way, but she didn't stop him from looking at her like that. I walked up closer to the pair and rested my hands on Becky's knees. “No school for a year?” Becky glanced at me and shrugged again. “Yes, it'll be a while before we can start school in-” Becky looked around to make sure no one was looking. “Start school in our new home, in Texas.” Becky stared at me and throwned. “Please don't worry, our home will always be in Pennsylvania. Not Texas.” I nodded, but didn't say anything. Becky let Eddie down and Eddie sat on the ground looking glum, fidleing with he's hands and glancing at the TV. I gave up and walked over to Caleb and sat next to him as he watched the end of the movie. I sat real close to him and stared at he's face till he looked over at me bored like. “What?” “You want to look around this place before... You know.” I asked with a quick shrug. Caleb glanced back at the TV, then brought Eddie closer to him then sat him in front of the TV. “There, it's yours Eddie.” Eddie smiled of course as Caleb and me sat up, and of course he went right too looking for cartoons, if there where any on which wasn't likely. “Don't be long.” Becky said, I was going to awnser but Caleb quickly grabbed my hand and started walking out of the living room and into the blue hallway. We didn't need to go but the stairs, actually Caleb's dad was at the top of the stairs looking dead tired, and I'm sure Caleb didn't want to talk to him right then. So quickly again he pulled me into one of the downstairs rooms so quickly we didn't know where we where going. Caleb and me leaned againt the door we where now behind listening carefully to the sound of steps down the stairs. While Caleb still had he's head agesnt the door I looked at the room we where in. It was the same wooden room Abe and Mr Jasper where in yesterday. It really hit me then just how creepy the room was. I couldn't actually see much of anything, the only light was coming from below the door. I stayed close to Caleb till my eyes ajusted to the lack of light better. Caleb moved away from the door and just then he seemed to realize just where we where. “Oh, I didn't know they had a room that wasn't all blue in this house.” He said. “I saw this room yesterday.” I spoke in a quite voice as I slowly stepped closer to him and pressed my hip and arm agenst him, though he of course quickly moved away from me like I was sick, probably because I was a girl. “Neat, this place is creepy looking you know? Looks like the kind of place someone would get murdered at.” I nodded as he steped away from me, walking through the room. “How old do you think this house is?” I asked, following him real close. “Oh it could date all the way back to when America was made! Or the civil war!” “The last one sounds a lot more likely...” “Maybe, do you think anyone died here?” He started messing around, looking and touching things on a small dusty shelf. “No idea, probably. I mean a lot of people die inside and people did use to live here... And you shouldn't put your hands in that shelf because it's probably full of spiders.” Caleb rolled he's eyes and kept on crowming through the shelf. I put my hands behind my back and let my eyes wonder around the room for a little bit. I played with the end of my hair as my eyes hit that little door on the floor. My feet stood close tugether and I spoke up. “Do you see that door over there?” Caleb moved he's hands away from the shelf and he's eyes met the door too. “Yeah, what is that?” He's voice got quiter as he's speech ended, him and me walked over to the door on the floor then glanced up at each other, him smiling and me throwning just a little. “You think it's a celer right?” He asked and I nodded. “Me too,” He went down as I toke a step back, and he flung the door open showing dark grey steps that led down into blackness, so black nothing could be seen. He looked back up at me again till smiling, then got up and took my hand as he started down the steps into the darkness with me. “Be careful where you step...” I wispered as my head was eaten by the shadow of the darkness, and my eyes felt all tougether useless. Each step he toke I heard very well, almost a ehco. So you can imagine how loud it was when Caleb lost he's footing and fell forward with me along for the ride. There was a loud loud spack and he's screem ended with a 'ah,' last noise as the air was taken out of he's lungs. He's face surely hit concreat hard along with he's stomach. I fell mostly onto of him, the side of my head hit the floor hard and for a second the only thing I felt was my left foot, the hell of my shoe on the last step we fell off of. The ground felt oh so cold and dirty, the dust brushed up agesnt my cheek like cotton, and I wished my mouth wasn't open so close to that dirtly floor. Suddenly there was a hand on my hair, and someone pulled me off of the ground and into their arms, away from the dirty floor. “Are you two ok?” My mouth shut and my eyes opened, too look into Abe's. “Yeah.. I'm ok. Deb are you?” Abe let me down and my shoes tapped on the ground, and beside me was Caleb as we looked up at Abe, with him being one step apove us, he looked like a gaint. “I'm ok, thank you..” I said and looked around the room more, but I couldn't see anything in there yet. “Come on, follow me. I'll look you over when we get up.” Abe said as he started up the steps and we followed him like he said. I could see Caleb's face look at the celler around us as we stepped out of there and into the lighter room. Abe shut the door on the floor, and took up and streaked. “I heard you two fall down from outside this room so it must have been hard.” He mensioned as he started looking us over. “It wasn't that bad, I was just getting up when you found us.” Abe bent down to take a closer look at Caleb's face. “Eh, you got a big red mark on your forhead, that will turn grey soon no dought. And Deb you got cut makes on your hands, let me take care of that before we leave.” Carefully he grabbed one of my hurt hands, and one of Caleb's fine ones, and walked us out of that dark room and into the light of the blue hallway. “Caleb, go over and watch Eddie with Becky, me and Deb will get back to you in a second, just gotta patch this up.” “Why?” Caleb asked. “The cuts on her hands aren't that bad.” Abe signed and lightly puched him in the derection Caleb needed to go. “I'll tell you in a second, just go.” Caleb gave him a sour face, but did as he was told. I tried to give Caleb a understanding face, but I didn't understand so how could I? Abe took me upstairs and into the bathroom and sat me on the tolet set as he looked around in the cabnits for something. I swayed my feet with way and that while he worked, humming a little tun that I learned in school to myself. Abe found a long roll of bandages and rapped them around both of my hands tighter then they really needed to be. I looked at him clearly wanting a awnser, and him just winked and said. “I'll tell you in a little bit ok?” After he was done doing he's work, he lifted me off of the tollet seat and said wait as he walked out of the room. I stood there looking down at my hands for a second, they sure did seem a little overdone, and if he was going to rap me so tight, why not do the same to Caleb's head? Suddenly I heard a noise near me, before I looked up I put my rabbed up hands behind my back, and looking up I saw Mr Ender, looking tired and standing in the door way. “Oh, hello Debbie.” He said, rubbing he's face, then giving me a odd look. “Are your hands ok?” “Oh...” I moved my hands away from my back and left them in front of my stomace. “I just got hurt a little bit, Abe was just in here helping me out.” “Yeah.. I saw him walk out of here, I-” Mr Ender turned around and there stood Abe behind him, looking a little uneasy. “She's fine.” Abe said in a stuff voice, then walked up to me and placed a hand on my shoulder and face Mr Ender. “We'll be leaving now, sorry to bother you.” Mr Ender shrugged then stumbled into the bathroom as the two of us walked out, before he shut the door behind himself I said. “Bye!” And he membled bye back, Abe gave me a warning face and I looked back down at my feet as we wallked down the stairs and into the hallway, meeting our siblings in the living room, as they waited for us.

I remember how they all looked very well even to this day, it was one of those things that's burned into your memory purely because of it's importantce. Like a lot of memoreies I'd have after the age of 8, the memories wouldn't be happy or sad, nor would I want to change them. They are what they are, the bad and the good. They made me the woman I am now, a rather boring woman with a odd uncomen edge. Something that puts many people off, or draws others in. God made everyone diffrant after all, and everyone is odd in a diffrant way, some good ways others bad. Some could call it pastive, or that I have no drive in life, but I really never played a role in how my own life go's up until way later in it. I was seemingly put on this earth too futher help the people around me, and that is in my opnion a high honor that I was gifted. Sure my own ability to help other people was of my choice, I didn't have too. But God gave me the opsion and I toke it. If I had stayed in Pennsylvania with my real father, I'd still be the sameish person I am now, most likely anyway, I am who I am. But I can easly ivison myself being less humble, being less heavenly, being less careing, being less mindful of others and how people work, being less understanding of the minds of men and women and how we are diffrant, and being overall less happy. But I have no idea because I did not live that life, it could have been harder, could have been easyer. All I know is things from this point on where not easy, but they where not hopeless or deprived of love. I will not lie and say I enjoy reliving some of the more unhappy moments of my life, and I will not lie and say I'm always proud I lived it. But I did. It's strange how one part of can be so horrible and so unpleasant, and yet a anouther can be so peaceful and seemingly happy to others outside of your skin and mind, but in your head during the good times your just waiting for the bad to happen again and it ruins any enjoyment of the good times, and when something- even something small, bad happens you just sit back and go 'there it is, I was waiting!' like that mentalitly makes you the bigger person. Later in life I have noticed people assoshiating hopefulness and faith with inoceance and ingorance. But I've seen even people with a complet and utter lack of inoceance youth and rose colored look at the world still have hope. Ill men can have hope, broken men can have hope, starving men can have hope, drying men can have hope, men who have no reason to believe or hope in anything, can have hope. My life wasn't that hard, overall like most decent folk in America, it was a large canvas of good and bad, the good is what we enjoy, the bad is what charms but into staying. That morning I never saw most of the adults in that house ever again, at least on Earth anyway. That morning Becky, still inocent yet mother-like, was holding Eddie to her chest and smiled at me when I came into the room. She was 13. Caleb was cold faced and so young looking compared to the twins who where only a year older then him, he showed a certain foranceness I don't really want to mension, he's bloude hair with the white strains and dark eyes and shorter look compared to the rest of us just made that more clear, the man he'd be still so unclear to anything, I even think God was suprided. He was 12. I was, well myself, you know me by now. I guess I was really no one then, I can't really comment on what I was when memories of places and people then fade to me now. I was 8. Eddie was as good as a kid then could be, everything you'd want out of a little boy, that was back when we called him Eddie and not Ed, now I have to slap myself in the head every time I want to call him Ed. He was 5. And Abe, well Abe was something else all tougether. He tares us apart and brings us tougether. Him, like me later in life, does not live for himself but lives for others. But the way he does it is more of a masculine way of going about it. Then he was 13. None of us toke a second look at that old blue house, because it held no importance to us, it wasn't our home and besides from Miss Lois, no one inside really meant anything to us anyway. Our old home was in the city, our dear parents where dead, and we have no friends for family besides each other. So when Abe stepped in front of the forest, with no clear woods path ahead of us and told us too “Go quickly, someone will surely notice we're gone in about 10 minitures or so, we have to run.” We didn't live anything behind, everything we needed was with us then. The problem was staying alive all the way to the Texas border, and too this new home and town of ours.

CHAPTER 3

Come to think of it, I don't believe I had ever walked a long distance before this part of my life. Here's how we first started out. Through the enishal heavey brush and throwns of the forest that would have been more painful and probably up too my knees, Abe carried me with one arm for the first 15 miniutres of walking, and Becky carried Eddie with one arm, so just Abe Becky and Caleb where walking at first. The twins carried also in the other arm by the handle two cases. Along the walk we talked plenty, mainly me and Caleb because Eddie fell asleep and the twins where breathing too hard to talk proper. But anyway later on Abe told me just what was in both of the cases. None of us really had much of anything to say. In fact none of us brought up this new and excitting jouney we where all now going on. Now one of the problems with telling you this story is that it's hard to convay just how long it took, and just how long every single day felt to us, without also in the process boring you too death. So throughout this I will mostly try to subscribe the nature that we walked by every few miniures and hours, and the kinds of birds we saw. Of course I don't remember such small seemingly meaningless details, but it makes little difrance anyway. The begginging of this forest in Pennsylvania was full of throns and long sharp sticks that poke out of the ground for the first 20 minitures of walking. There was no path, and Abe said as long as where all in this state, we will not be following any dirt man made paths, and we'd have to look for deer paths instead if our eyes where keen enough. Leafs where just starting to fall but only the redish and prettyist ones, so even though the thick forest was cocked full of dark greyish green color but the red was a nice here and there splash of color. The trees where thick too, but then I didn't know the names or the signs to even tell their names. But I did know what they looked like. They had grey brownish color of the bark and they where more thick around then my hole body was, not all of them where quite that thick, but most of them where, or even more thick then two of me! The trees gave of a acent vibe and feel to me deeply, and then I'd look all around me and see the trees cercleing me and I'd wonder if dinosours walked around them too a long time ago, and when I told the rest of the gang about that thought Caleb said surely not dinosours but maybe some yankees did a little while back, and that seemed a lot likely to me now honestly, but people didn't really talk about a firey rock from space killing all the dinosuars back then, and I'm sure that wasn't very good on the trees either. Again after about 15 minitures Abe let me down and told me it was time to start walking, quich I was fine with given my feet where going numb. But after a good while of walking, I'd say 20 minitures I'd find it too be harder to keep up with the group then I'd think it too be. It was actually a little worse then it would have been later on because Abe told us by then 30 or 40 minitures in or so, they'd have surely noticed that we where gone, and we would have too keep up on the pace. After around a hour of walking, we all walked into a short of very small area of the forest that didn't have as many leafs on the ground, where it was mostly covered with moss. The reason it didn't have as many leafs on the ground was that even though there where a good deal of trees around the mossy area, they where younger trees, probably more or less a few years old, none older then Eddie. So they didn't have as many leafs to shed. When we found this area before Becky had agreed to it, Abe dropped he's case (not too hard of course) on the moss and stated. “Ok, where taking a break now!” Then he immiditly sat down on the moss hard and started huffing, staring at he's shoes. Becky's face was hard to read, but she too let go of her case she was carrying and gently let Eddie on the ground, then flopped down in a very unatraive mannour. Me and Caleb soon followed onto the ground. In fact soon all of us where laying spread out on the ground panting and spreding our legs and arms as far as they could go. The only one of us that didn't look flat out tired was Eddie. Who thought it was great fun to run around our bodies and jump over them like obstacles in a playground. Still laying down I lifted my legs up to my body to take off my black shoes. You only ever realize how tight they are till you have to walk in them for half a hour. I left my socks on when I laid back down on the grass and put my shoes to my left side. While Eddie was running around like a manieac he almost tripped over my shoes. Becky stayed up only sitting down and not laying like her twin or Caleb. Caleb himself scotted closer to me enough to where our shoulders where touching each other's. “Do you think they're all looking for us now?” Caleb asked, looking right at me though I was farely sure he was refuring to everyone here. “I hope not, I don't know how fare we've gotten.” I said back in a quite voice. “Oh surely.” Abe started, huffing a little but still sounding very comfutable with the hole thing. “We've been gone a hour, they must have at least noticed, at least Eddie's dad would have for sure.” He said that last part in a joking way, but it only seemed to make Becky look a little down. She called Eddie over to her and he lap on her lap puffing from running around for so long. “This woods is boring Becky.” Eddie said suddenly. “I don't know why you'd think that Eddie. What makes it so boring to you? “There are no moutains anywhere! Everything is flat and there are no animals!” Caleb lifted the top half of he's body up to look at he's youngist sibling. “This looks like every other forest you've been in. What's so boring about it more then any others you been in?” Eddie made a face like Caleb was the stupidist person that was ever in this forest.  “No woods I ever been in where fun. I want to see moutains and wolves!” “Mhh, Wolves are a good start.” Caleb said thoughtfully. “No there not!” I yelled fully sitting up. “Haven't you seen any on TV? Wolves are horrible things!” “Well we're not going to make them our friends! We're gonna kill them of course!” Eddie said smiling proudly at what side he stood on. “I think it'd be better if we never had to deal with them at all in the first place.” I said annoyed now. “Well maybe we'll see a pack of them while we're walking through the woods!” Eddie looked really excited about this possible attack, now who was getting attacked was the question here. “But we don't have any rifles you know.” Caleb added sadly. “Oh... Well we'll throw rocks at them then!” “Rocks won't work at all, even if we hit them right where we wanted the change of finding rocks big enough to kill them is unlikely. And wolves are fast anyway so they'd surely just run you into circles until they get ya.” Caleb exsplained and Eddie sunk into Becky's lap and signed along with me, annoyed with the logic. “Your no fun.” “Hey, I'd love to kill a wolf right now but I don't know how.” “How about we don't kill anything!” I yelled out and they all agreed to that. Really I'm not much of a dog person. To me they always seemed like scary big gaints that will randomally attack you. Hey, no one ever said kids made any sense. 

After a little while longer of resting, we where back at it again. There was a long long streach of nothing really happening, which is going to be a running theme going forward. Eddie walked with us for a good hour until he got tired again and needed to be carried by Becky, I could tell she was not pleased with having to carry him and her case again, but she didn't say and word. Abe read that exspression she had on and took her case from her. We saw a pair of American goldfinchs flying around us and following us like we where the most intersting things in this forest, and I guess we where really so I can't blame the birds. There was a morning dove here and there too but no animals beyond birds and a few bugs here and there on the ground. Actually at one point a small small spider got on Eddie's arm, and he didn't tell Becky it was on him at first he just sat there and watched the little bug craw up he's arm, but when Becky saw the thing on him she sqeeked and blown the thing off of he's arm then checked him over while still walking. There was a time when the sun was showing hard throw the trees, a lovely Heaven like yellow. Abe started slowing down and then quickly looked at all of us and smiled and then we where all looking at where we where now. The forest had suddenly stopped and we had hit a dirty road with thick forest on both sides of it. At that point we where all so tired and sore from walking so long that without any warning I flopped down onto the grass and signed loudly thanking God. Becky put down Eddie and sat down too, all though grained more carefully and graceful like with her sitting on her worn out legs. Eddie jumped a few times then ran over to Caleb and started jumping next to him now. “We made it! We made it!” Eddie yelled with delight. “Made it where?” Caleb said in a put out tone and sounded like it belonged to a kid much older then 12. “Out of Pennsylvania!” Caleb slapped the top of he's head and signed loudly, but before anything rude could come out of Caleb's mouth Abe stepped up. “No, we're surely not out of the state yet, but we made it too a road and that's really good. Soon we'll find a town where I'll find someone who can drive us out of state.” Eddie looked behind himself with a blank look for a second then shrugged like that meant nothing then went back to looking happy and jumping around. We all stayed in the cover of the trees far back enough to where anyone driving by (and there was a car here and there) couldn't see us unless they where really really looking, but we could see the road. Then after we all sat down (even Eddie wow) Abe out of one of the cases he carried he opened it and apparently there was a tone of food inside! Nothing too great or yummy, actually most of it was canned beans, a lot of it was, now I really felt like a cowboy. Thank goodness there was a can opener inside the same case. But there was other kinds of foods stuffed inside too all the corners. Nothing great just canned tuna, tomato sauce, and a few fruits like apples and bananas and water of course. While we all sat down to eat, Abe told us that he was going to wait by the road and ask a random passing by car where the closet town was, and that he didn't want any of us to come out of the hidden shade of the trees while he did that. We all ate a lot before heading out, so only eating two times in one day wasn't all that bad (even if Eddie complained a few times about being hungery before now) but even with the food being mostly bland it tasted good given how hungery I was, and all of us where. Caleb ate quitely, Becky ate quicky, Eddie ate fast but only because Becky didn't want him talking while he ate, and I ate slowly while watching Abe on the far other side of the road. Around 3 cars passed him by before the 4^th one stopped by him. It was a small yellow car and from as far away from the car and the road as I was, I'm pretty sure it was a small older woman in it. They talked for a little bit, not too long. Abe had a plesant face on as they talked, and then the car drove off and Abe walked up too us with he's hands in he's pockets and a spring in he's step. “Hey!” He said as he popped out from a tree like a cartoon character on some of the new shows coming out. “That woman I just talked too said there's a small town half a mile from here. She was going that way right now.” He ecsplained in a very loud way, and flopped down with us as we where half way though. “I don't want much, I'll eat half a can of beans Becky.” Becky nodded and just gave him the rest of her can, though he protested a little but he wanted it. “Do we have time to get there before nightfall?” Becky asked with her hands on her lap. “No, we should sleep here for the night. Hopefully tommarow we'll be sleeping in a car or a small shelter.” Becky shrugged after he finished. “We'll just see when we get there. Really if it wasn't for the bugs I'd rather sleep outside.” After we all got done eating and drinking (Becky was very protective over how much water we drank) Becky put everything back into the suit case, even the garbage. Then Becky and Abe sat us down and exsplained that in the two suit cases they couldn't fit any blankets or pillows in them, and weather or not all the places we'd be sleeping in for the next- however long this jouney was going to be, we had to be ready to sleep cold and uncomturbal, that last part was only told to us by Abe, Becky didn't seem to be able to look at us when he did. That didn't go down well with us much. Caleb started a agument over why didn't they steal one of the pillows sheets in the blue house and stuffed it with blankets and let him carry it, Abe didn't really have a reaspone to that beyond he didn't want him to have to carry anything, which only seemed to bother Caleb more. Eddie pitched a real honest fit over it being too cold and that he wanted to go and sleep in mommy and daddy's room, which defnitly hurt mine and Becky's hearts, and went on crying and yelling for so long that Abe had to force him too lay on the moss ground next to Becky until he cried himself to sleep, lucky him. It wasn't really that cold anyway. By then it was already dark so to keep him warm I laid down beside Eddie and held him in my small arms until my eyes fell...

I think I was in a dream still when I woke up, I remember being very comfused when my eyes open, almost like I was in someone else's body. When I suddenly felt a great shift next to my face I quickly jerked up, in fact I jerked up so fast that I hurt my head doing so. Below me was Eddie shifting in he's sleep. After I identifded what was it that moved next to me, and rubbed my eyes for a very long time till I looked around myself fully. And I truly realized where I was and what was happening, and that all of this was really happening to us, that our parents where dead and we ran away from home and that we barely known where we where going now and who we where going to meet and live with at the end of it all. Something about that made me feel a way, it wasn't quite sad but I didn't want to cry so I couldn't identify it, so I just sat there and looked at my legs as I sat on the grass and moss. At some point I slowly started paying attension too what was happening around me. Abe was asleep on the ground and he looked somewhat dead on the ground, he just must have been that tired. Caleb was awake but still laying down, just watching the trees far above us, they where really really tall trees that alone was true. Eddie was of course asleep next to me. And Becky was the only one being useful. She was fixing her hair with her fingers gentally, she always held her long raven black hair in high regard, and always took very good care of it, momma didn't have to teach her how to self care. I cannot say the same for myself and surely not for any of her boys, out of the boys Eddie was probably the best and that wasn't saying much. Seeking of the boys, after Becky worked on my hair with her fingers all of the boys got up nearly all at the same time, Becky said it looked like solders at a base waking up at a strict time. Well not so strict for us, given the sun was already far up into the sky. I asked Abe what time he thought it was and Abe said it didn't matter just what hour it was, all that mattered now was if it was day or night, and every new day started with the rise of the sun. Caleb looked very tired and he kind of stumbed around as he walked. When I walked up to him asking if he wanted anything from me he just waved he's hand and streached. Abe said we'd eat once we got into the town, which was fine by me because I wasn't hungery to begin with. Abe grabbed he's case and Becky grabbed her's, Eddie was ready to go so no one needed to carry him at all. And we all started going forward.

We didn't walk on the road, Abe said that “We want to be able to see the road as we walk though the woods, but we don't want anyone to see us because we don't want anyone to ask questions about where we're all going. And if someone does-” And he made sure he was looking at all of us little ones. “Tell them where seeing our cousin, because we are. Got it?” Like normal I nodded, Eddie didn't pay good atension, and Caleb listened but didn't say or do anything to it. The walk though the woods went much better then yesterday. But still a odd hollowness followed with me, and again it was all sort of sinking in for me what was really happening.  And a glumness hung over me as we went along, at the time I thought it was the same kind of feeling that Caleb had, but that's just what I thought then and I was young then. Speaking of Caleb he felt like my only companeion, Eddie talked to Caleb sure but not to me, and the twins only talked when it was to tell one of us younger kids not to do something. Didn't know it then but silance would be our motif going forward in our lives. Caleb had he's head facing low to ground and he's hands in he's pockets when we all kept quite, but when him and me did talk (though he did keep low) he always looked to me and smiled as he did so, and lisened really well. Not really the kind of emoinal intelagance you'd exspect from a 12 year old boy huh?

We kept on walking for a good while longer. Then the woods that was near the road slowly became more and more forest till it pushed us to the road so much we had to walk on the road now because the forest had nested right next to the road, or I guess the road had nested right next to the forest. Only a few cars had passed us by but the ones that did on the side we where walking on paid us no mind other then slowing down, witch was good for us. Then after about 30 minitures of walking in good time, in the distance we could see a town from far far away. When we saw it Becky looked to us all and smiled, and Abe nodded, and we kept on walking down the road at a faster pace. Eddie got weirdly happy about see the town and kept on jumping ahead of us while we walked. Then after probably a anouther good amout of minitures we got into the town, and let me just say it was very small in size but full of people. It wasn't all that develuped, it didn't seem most of the people there had cars from the outside of all the houses. There wasn't all that many non home buildings but that ones that where there where filled up with people. Once we got into the town Abe called Eddie closer to him and me too, we all stayed real close as we walked around. Then when we stopped in front of the one and only gas stasion in the town Abe told us too stay inside the building at the very back of it, and Abe gave Becky a dime too buy some candy for Eddie and Deb while he stayed outside and found someone. He didn't say what that meant to us but Becky sure did seem to understand it, and so we went in while he stayed out. Inside there wasn't much too look at, but there was a few bored looking teenage boys goofing off when we got in a waited. Becky took her good sweet time picking out the candy, and without walking and just staying in the same place for a while, I got bored real quick. Becky had a hard hard time keeping Eddie and me near her, Caleb seemed to think it was very very funny. And to make it worse for Becky the teenage boys started talking fancy to her, quite she didn't seem to mind much if it wasn't for the fact she was watching 2 very bored children, she tried to talk too them while holding on too the both of us, no one paying any mind to Caleb at all. “Are those your cousins?” The orange haired boy asked, him and a black haired boy where the main two that where talking to Becky, a anouther boy who looked like the orange haired boy's brother was in the gas staion hanging around but didn't look like he cared all that much about anything that was going on right now. “No, there my siblings.” Becky said kindly, smiling a little tired like but she kept a good posture, it wasn't that she looked put out by them, but that it wasn't the time. “Huh, yeah I got three siblings too. But we're all nearly the same age.” The black haired boy said cacually. “Oh, actually I have four siblings. I have a twin brother.” “Oh!” The orange haired boy laughed and looked too the black haired one. “You should tell Annie about that, bet she's be intrested.” The black haired cringed and looked away a little red faced. I saw Eddie flop too the ground and pout with he's arms crossed, normally this behavor wouldn't fly with Becky, but now she barely payed any mind to us other then to make sure we where near her. “Ha, that's cute.” Becky mused. “What's it like having a twin brother? Does he look just like you only, uh a boy.” The orange haired boy asked, now leaning agesnt the wall. “Mhh, not really. He's really muscular for a 13 year old. And I'm more skinny.” Both of the boys looked a little confused but nodded. “Your 13? Huh.” “Yeah, actually Abe, uh my brother, will be here soon.” “Uh, that's nice. Hey my name's Sammy, and he's Jim.” Sammy, the orange haired boy pointed too Jim, the black haired one. “What's your name?” “Ha, I'm Becky. Nice too meet you two.” The boys and her smiled at each other, while I followed Eddie to sitting on the floor, Caleb just watched this comversation with intrest. “Are you just passing by Jamestown?” Jim asked, and Becky made a funny face. “This is called Jamestown? Like the one in history?” “Ha, yeah it's spelled the same, but of course isn't the same town. But I'm sure you could guess that. But you don't know what town your in?” Becky cringed a little but nodded. “Yes I don't know where I am. But yes I am just passing by. Me and my siblings are- uh, moving.” “Oh,” Sammy nodded, a kind sympathy in he's eyes. Jim shrugged and shook he's head. “I'm sorry to hear that Becky, where are you moving too?” “Ha, actually all the way from Pennsylvania too Texas believe it or not. I've never been that far from home before.” “That is a long ways away, are your parents going there for better work or something?” “Oh, no. We're all going there too live with our cousin. My parents died recently.” Sammy cringed and got a softer look in he's eyes, Jim looked a little uncomftable and said he wanted to go and look for a snake for someone, and left Becky and Sammy to talk. “I'm so sorry.” He said, Becky nodded and said it was alright. Weirdly enough when Becky said our parents died I got a weirdly iccy feeling inside, like I had done something wrong, as weird as that is. “My dad died a few years ago too, in the war.” Becky nodded. “I'm sorry, my father actually wanted to serve, but he was too sickly too do much of anything, at least that's what he always said.” Sammy shrughed. “Well, anyone can be useful in some way. I mean even women can be useful in wars, so you know.” Becky nodded. “That's true, well I suppose in he's mind if your not risking your life, then your not worth something in a war. Not saying it makes sense.” “Ah well, some people are just stuck in their ways.”  Their talk was inturuted by the store door opening, Becky looked over quickly and signed when it was just some older man she never seen before and not our brother. “Hey, I hope you don't mind me asking this..” Becky started. “Does your house have a phone?” Sammy throwned but nodded. “Yes- well actually no. But Jim's does and I'm there more then my own home. Why?” “Ha.. Well once me and my siblings we to Texas, we of course won't know anyone there, let alone people around our own age. And I would like to be able to talk to people my own age... Sorry if you don't want to tell me you don't have too.” Sammy laughed and blushed a little. “Oh, that's not a problem, actually..” We looked around himself akwardly till he had to find Jim and have him give him a small piece of paper and a very thick black pencil, he smiled back at Becky before he used the wall too write on it, then he handed it back over too Becky. “Here you go, it's Jim's phone number and where you can write a letter right to me. I'm normally at Jim's on every day after school but Sundays, normally I'm hone then.” Becky nodded, and looked at it kindly for a few moments before folding up the paper and hiding it in the one front pocket of her dress. “I'll keep it in my suit case, so it can be safer. I'm not sure when I'll be able to write you, it's going to take me a while to get to Texas. But as soon as I get there I'll write you a letter.” “That's fine, ahh what's your full name?” “Ha ha, Becky Lois Jasper. What's your full name?” “Sammy Hazes. That's a nice full name.” “Thank you.” “yeah, well I hope the trip to Tex-” The store door opened and Becky froze when Abe walked in, he seemed very happy with himself as he casulally walked up too all of us, Eddie jumped up and grabbed onto him, and Caleb had a sigh of relefe. “I found someone who can...” Abe's smile fell as he turned over to Sammy, then did a once over of the hole store. “Hello. What's happening here?” “Oh,” Becky laughed. “We're just talking.” “Right, well that's nice, but we got to go now. Come on guys.” Abe head singaled to Becky, and she gave Sammy a sorry look and moved us younger kids along like sheep. Abe probably would have grabbed her hand if it wasn't for the fact that he's two hands where full with the two suit cases. Before the store door shut I saw Sammy wave and smile at Becky, and she did it back too him.

When we got outside, I imidditaly saw the car we where going to be driving off in. And it didn't look that hot. It was a small black, old looking car. I'm not sure we could all fit in it! “Anyway, I got someone to take us at least out of state. I'm not sure how far he'll take us but I told him where we're going, so he won't take us in the wrong derection.” We all nodded, and Caleb streecked he's back very far up. “Ok, well even a few miles will help us out.” Abe nodded. “That's right Caleb. But please, everyone let's not make too much noise in there, he... Doesn't seem like the kind of person too like kids all that much. So does anyone need to go to the bathroom before we go?” “I do!” Eddie rasied he's hand up high. He never minded telling anyone he needed to go after he got out of dippers, he's very proud of himself I'll say that. “Me too.” Caleb said a great deal quiter. “Oh, I'll take them both!” Becky said quickly. “Wait, I mean-” Abe looked back to the car, then signed loudly. “Fine, just don't be long, I'll keep Deb.” Becky nodded and fast as a cat she took Caleb and Eddie by the hands and went back into the store. 

Abe signed, then looked back at me and smiled jokingly. “Girls, your not going to be like that someday are you?” I smiled back up at him. “I don't know, what do you mean?” “Oh, you'll see.” He reached down and patted me with he's musclar arm. “You'll always be my girl, won't you?” I nodded, and he smiled more as we got into the car.

Chapter 4

By the time we all got into the little black car, it was far too tiny for all of us. When me and Abe got in the man at the front of the car looked back at the two of us. “Huh? Where's the other three?” The man asked, he looked to be about in he's 50s, though he seemed to have a very tired face. “Going to the bathroom, they'll be back soon, sorry.” Abe said in a very apolegetic tone of voice. “Yeah, and what's up with that little girl there? Are all of your siblings that young?” Abe cringed a little. “No, one is a little younger then her, but the other two are near my age. They won't make noise I promise.” The man at the front shook he's head and looked back to he's wheel. “Darn, you'll regret running away I promise you.” He said in a deep voice. “We're not run aways.” Abe said sternly. The man at the front waved he's hand and laughed slightly, but said nothing more.  It wasn't too much longer till Becky Caleb and Eddie came back, and gosh did we all have to sqezze in or what? The man at the front of the car seemed it think it was pretty funny but didn't truly comment on it, and then the car was off down the road and out of the town.

The time that we where in that car blured tougther in my mind. I fell in and out of sleep a lot much like someone who was bedridden sick. We went through a lot of fields and hardly any woods, but when we where't in a town there was always plenty of trees here and there. Went it had been night and fully dark for nearly a hour, the man stepped out of he's car and looked back at us tiredly. He parked near a small not so good... looking appartment building, even though it looked new. There wasn't many other cars parked near the one we where in, but the ones that where all looked simaler to this one. “Welp, I'm going to hit the hay. But I'm not sharing a room with five children so I hope you guys don't have a problem sleeping outside.” Becky was about to speak out but Abe put he's hand over her mouth as he walked into the building and left us here. “Oh, I'd rather sleep in the forest again...” She nearly cried, moving away from the rest of us as far as she could. “Me too, but there's no where better out here to sleep then in this car, and we need to stay in here so he won't leave us behind in the morning. Here how about we all do are bussness behind the building, and then me and Caleb can sleep upfront while you Deb and Eddie can sleep here, ok?” Becky cringed along with me.”Behind a building? That sounds very... well sounds like something a homeless person would do..” Abe shrugged. “Then I hope you only have too pee.” Becky slapped he's arm.

Abe taking Eddie, and Becky taking me, we all went one by one and well, did out bussness behind the building where hopefully no one could see us. There wasn't any trees near by to save our lives. Then when we got back to the car Abe got the suit cases out of the back of the car and we all ate a little. Washed up then laid back in the car trying to go to sleep. Abe and Caleb fell asleep easyly, and when I asked Becky why she wasn't laying down to sleep and instead sitting up, she said someone needed to stay awake in case something happened. When I asked what could even happen to us she didn't awnser. Eddie moved closer to me and fell asleep on my arm. He actually looked a little sad as he did so, menioning something about feeling cold, and Becky promised him that Texas will be a lot warming then here. It took me a good while to finally fall asleep, but I finally did while Becky rubbed my hair.

Something in me felt very sick when I woke up. When I looked to my right the door to that side was open, and Abe was standing tall with Caleb and a tired looking Eddie. “Hey, come on Deb, but don't wake up Becky.” Abe said as he gestured me over to him, and I crawlled out of the car and shut the door behind me. The night had turned into day as the sun was showing just over the distance. The hole flat land that was around us was hit nicely by the sun, all cars and concreat and the apparetment building. “It's best that we all take a little walk around before that man comes back, we'll leave Becky because she was up all night.”

All of us but Becky took off from the car, and started walking around the large parking lot. It was kind of cold that morning, but with the sun hitting on my skin and hair it felt a lot better. It took a while of walking before Eddie started smiling and and running ahead of us all. Abe kept him close in case anyone we didn't know came out. Really the parking lot seemed rather dead, like a long lost play ground. Eddie complained that he wanted to eat something warm, and it took Abe a while to exsplain why they didn't have any warm foods and that they could eat warm foods maybe when they got too Texas. When Caleb subjested that after we're done being driven in this car that we could cook our meals with a fire, Abe admitted he didn't know how to start a fire very well, but he did think of that already and will try next time he can.  When we got back to the car Becky was up and streacking next to the car, though she still seemed very tired, but was a little worried when she didn't see us in the car with her. Soon it started warming up all over, it was fun jumping around and moving in the sunlight, but Abe told us all too get back inside the car because if we got sweaty none of us could take a shower for however long he did not know. Luckly we didn't have too wait too long in the car bored because the man who had been driving us came out of the appartment building and took he's seat at the front of the car, with all of us again pilled in the back like yesterday. “Huh, kind of surprised your all still here.” He laughed dryly. “I hope your not thinking of running back home now, because I got somewhere to be in West Virginia, and no way I'm going back in Pennsylvania.” Becky sat up a little straghter. “We're already out of state?” “Yep, in Delaware right now, probably be in West in two days or so. After that I'm off the road so you'll all have to beat it.”

None of us really talked after he said that. He must have felt bad, or maybe it was just a little angle on he's shoulder talking in he's ear because for the next two days, he brought us along with himself breakfast and dinner every morning and night. Now it wasn't good food, and he always thrown it at Abe and said “Sort it out yourselves.” But hey, it was food wasn't it? It was just enough to where we didn't have to open the suit cases for the next two days. He let us sleep in he's car for the next two days as well while he slept in a apparetment building, though I would like too add that he said goodnight on the last night, if that means anything too you. Then came the morning of the third day, by then, though we where farely well fed and slept fine, even with the twins taking us to walk every morning and night all of our legs where hurting farely badly, and we wanted to be in the forest back in Pennsylvania again, it felt better there, if not a little less safe. Then I saw nature as being more scary then man. We where just getting near a dirt cross roads, off the mine road when suddenly the car stopped and our sleepy minds where paying attension again. “Ok!” the man at the front said as he turned over to look at us all. “This is as far as I take you all, we're in West Virginia, if you keep going in eh, south westish derection, I suppose you'll all get where your all trying to go, not really sure where your all going in Texas, used to work there in back when I was in the military, big place.” Suprisely Abe ditched the formalities and smiled at the man kindly. “We know where we're going, thank you so much for taking us this far sir.” The man's face changed as we stiffly started getting out of the car, a much more gental Godly look. “Oh, yeah it's no problem.” He said back lamely. As we all got out Abe hurded us to the side of the car facing the man, behind the front of the car. “Thank you so much for your kindness.” Becky said. The man starred at her for a second, throwned then looked back to the road and without a final goodbye, he drove off, and I never saw that little black car ever again.

It was still early in the day when we where left there. Abe turned over to us all and smiled. “Welp, you heard the man, let's keep on going where we need to go.” We had already started walking as Abe whent on. “We'll stay on this dirt road for now, but when we find a real road again we'll stay on the forest side, to stay hidden.” No one made any verbal annolagment of what he had just said. Abe carried one suit case and Becky the other. Caleb lagged behind us a little so I tried to stay behind with me a little so we could talk somewhat. Eddie was the one far ahead of us all. All jumping and skipping like a little girl. At one point he got so far ahead that when he was suddenly hidden by a tree, Abe called for him to come back (very loudly I might add.) and he ran back stumbling over to me and Caleb. It was nice too see him smiling again. “If we can't watch TV, can't we pretend to be the characters on TV?” Caleb waved he's right hand at Eddie and shook he's head. “I'm too old for that. And what kind of characters on TV?” “Cowboys of course! What else?” Caleb seemed to be giving this pretned idea more thought. Shame Eddie wasn't born a few years earler, Caleb used to be quite the wild cowboy then. “Well, it sure beats being what ever lonney toons characters your a fan of.” “I don't like cartoons anymore! I'm not a baby!” “Big words for a 5 year old.” Caleb shrugged. I signed and crossed my arms. “Well what am I going to be?” I said. “A Indian! And me and Caleb can be the cowboys.” Caleb gave Eddie a funny look. “A girl can't play a Indian.” “Why not? Their where girl Indians, and we only got 3 people!” Eddie aguded. “I don't want to be a Indian, I'll be...” I thought for a moment. “The farmer's wife or something.” “Ok! How about we can both be Cowboys, but you Eddie can be the nice cowboy and I can be a evil no good cowboy. And Deb can be the near by farmer's wife who wants nothing to do with the fighting, but is forced too be in it because it's on her land where this is taking place.”  And the planning went on, there was only so much we could do while we where all walking, but it worked out fine. Haven't seen Caleb play pretend in a long while so it felt very nice. 

Later in the day the dirt road dyed off and we where all met with long streachs of forest. Abe looked concered but said. “Let's keep on walking in the west south derection, so I'll stay in the front, let's keep going while the sun is out.” And we did keep going. The thickness of the forest was great, greater then anything I've seen at that point. The reason it was so thick was because the trees where horse-chestnut, the bark wasn't thick, but the trees had lots and lots of leafs, it was so packed with leafs that most of the trees didn't look so healthy because they couldn't get good sunlight because of their neibors being so close. And the leafs where so close to the ground that Becky felt the need to hunch down as she walked to avido getting bugs on her from the leafs. We heard a lot of bird here now, more then the last forest we went through. At some point Eddie asked if there where any wovles in West Virginia, and Abe said he didn't know, and I'm not sure if what Eddie thought of that. The light of the day started leaving fast, and the forest didn't help the darkness problem. For some reason unlike the forest in Pennsylvania Abe seemed more on edge as it was getting dark, and wanted us too get out of this forest before night fully came. But that wasn't happening. And soon it was complettly dark and it was getting hard for us too walk though the woods now. And when Eddie and me started complaining about being hungery Becky and Abe decided it was time to bed down. Since we haden't eaten at all that day we had a little more then last time we had to break open the suit cases. Luckly we weren't close to being out yet, but it still wasn't as good as it used to be. When Becky asked Abe if he spent any money the past few days, he said we all still had the same amout that we did when we left the big blue house. Eddie seemed very tired that day, and without little flight as soon as he got done eating he crawlled over to Becky and fell asleep on her lap. Witch was cute for about 2 seconds till Becky realized that she couldn't sleep very well in the possisune he left her in, and had to move him so they could both sleep. Everyone else fell asleep just fine too, mainly because of how much we walked that day. Though given we had to sleep on grass this time not moss, it didn't feel quite as nice like the last time we slept outside. Before I fell asleep that night I got to hear a owl late at night for the first time.

That morning went real nice actually. Becky and Eddie slept in for a while wtich was very cute of course. By the time Abe Caleb and me where up they where both still asleep, and Abe said it wasn't fully light yet so we weren't in a rush. It's not like we had to be in Texas at a certain time anyway, our new gardian was waiting for us. Too bad he couldn't just pick us up by himself. Caleb sat on the ground with he's knees pressed close together and the top of he's face was hit by a hay of sunlight. “Hey Deb, come over here.” He said with a yawn at the end. I scooted over to him enough to where the sunlight was hitting me too. “Yeah, like that. There's only so many patches of sunlight in this forest, and while we're waiting we might as well get some sun.” “But Caleb, we've all been outside all the time anyway, I don't see the point in seeking out the sunlight when we've been getting so much of it already.” “Well yeah, but if we're going to be outside all the time we might as well get the most out of it.” I shrugged and sat with my knees close together like Caleb's. Abe took a nap for a little bit, but it didn't go too well for him because right when he finally fell asleep, Becky and Eddie woke up and so did Abe when Eddie jumped on him several times.  And so soon we where off again. Unlike yesterday we ate two diffrant times that day. I'd like to say we covered a lot of ground, but it's hard to say because the only thing we really saw was trees, trees, and more trees. No real signs of human life. We did find a few deer trails, and even some bird nests, which where all nice too see but at some point they all started to blur together to me. Really I wanted to drag most of the day, and I normally fell behind from the group. It got so bad at a point where Abe had to carry me with one arm as we went along. Eddie seemed that way too actually, not quite as tired as me but he complained a lot about hurting in he's legs, and at one point he started talking about wanting to go home, which not even Becky had anything to say about that. By the time it was nightfall we where still in the woods, and something about walking for 2 hole days and still being in the woods must have scarred us all because as soon as it got dark we all bedded down. The darkness of the forest really seemed intense that night, and since we didn't want to go any farther after it got dark, (really it was like we where all scard rabbits.) we where all stuck at the bottom of a hill covered in leafs, and because of that we got many bugs on us, and of course Becky hated that, so she didn't sleep at all that night. And while all of us got at least a little bit of sleep, Becky got none at all. But at least it was nice having someone keep watch. Abe let me and Eddie sleep somewhat on him, keeping us a little bit off of the ground. Caleb and Eddie where probably the only ones out of us that got much sleep. The noise of the woods seemed much more alive that night, and then it seemed anything could live there, untouched by man. The older I've gotten the more others would like to say how mythical or danguruse animals can't be out there, and I can't really disagree say it's my place to disagree with the modern man, I have little real opinions on what is and isn't out there. But that being said, I don't think a person who sleeps in a bed every night can truly understand just how big and wild this world is.

I was awake when the morning came, and I say morning came not sun, because no sunlight shrown though the trees well this time. Though there was certainly a calming relife that came with the morning, that I didn't even care about the lack of sunlight. And I felt safe again. Becky wanted us moving the second the sun came up, in her own words she said. “I don't like it here, and I will feel much better when we are out of this area of this state.” Abe seemed bothered by that but didn't protest at all. Eddie seemed stiff this morning and when we all sat down to eat breakfast he didn't want to eat much, we didn't want to push him too hard to do so because we needed to save the food for when we needed it, (though I can't say I never eyed either of the suit cases while we where walking any given day.) And after breakfast we started walking again. I imagine that we walked far less then the last two days, all of our legs hurt and none of us seemed in very bright spirts. Weirdly that day the only one of us that wanted to talk much was me. I wasn't really that I was happy or feeling great, I just wasn't feeling bad either. The only two I could really have much of a converstaion with was Becky and Caleb. But later in the day Becky got so tired that she couldn't really hold much of a talk. But when she could she seemed very kind and listened well. We mainly talked of small trival things like the forest and nature, and even the state we where in at the time. The other person that wanted to talk to me was Caleb. Well he actually did a lot of the talking, I was just the one that started it. He talked of movies he seen, and how when he starts back school in Texas, he wants to get better at reading so he can start reading history books like he planned to start doing before all the disaster happened. Out dad had a lot of books in he's study, all of them where probably given out too all of the family but he's children. And anyway he used to read to Caleb and Eddie war stories he had colected over time. Some even from our own family! But during the middle of the day our talk was intuped, and our walk too, but a few drops of rain, then more, and more and more till it was really going. Abe looked up at the sky like it had spat in he's face, and it took Becky pulling him along to stop him from yelling at the sky like a mad man. The reason he was so mad was because it was just so strong we couldn't keep going, and we had to all wait under a large pine tree. Luckly the thing was so thick that we where kept very dry, sitting at the base of the tree. Again just like last night I felt like a helpless rabbit waiting with the rest of my litter. Luckly for Becky it was less messy under the tree then that hill last night, so she was less scard of bugs and was able to fall asleep easyly. Eddie fell asleep next to her hudled up to her like two cats on a human's bed. Abe watched the rain triedly while I sat on he's lap. Nither of us talked at all but it felt good, really it did. You only get so many of those moments in life. I think Caleb took a nap took leaning on the tree but I couldn't tell. If it wasn't for the pine smell (which followed us for days afterwards.) the tree would have been perfect, not even the ground felt wet too me. And with Abe protecting me from the ground I wouldn't have noticed anyway. It's funny how the next person that would stumble apon that tree would never know it helped 5 wearly kids though a small storm. Speaking of the storm it only lasted about 2 hours I would say. It's hard to tell because just like last night everyone at least was asleep for a little bit. But at some point the rain was over, but it didn't look that way because even though all of the trees portected us from the rain at first, now they had to let go of their loud so we had to leave. Becky woke up with a grone but she seemed better, like a cloud had passed in her mind. There was little light left, and we all kept on walking for a while after dark too. But after I fell flat on my face in the wet forest dirt after tripping on something in the dark, Abe called it off and said we'd sleep under a tree again. So that night (After Becky tried her best to clean my dress off, which wasn't easy in the dark.) We all slept like babies under a smaller wet tree. It really was a good sleep that night too.

That morning it was a lot brighter then yesterday, but of course it was still very very wet, so we didn't want to stay bedded down on the wet dirt any longer then we had too. We actually didn't eat that night, we all just forgot. So that morning we ate for two meals. But again Eddie didn't want to eat much, Becky baby talked him into drinking a good deal of water, and be more or less forced food down he's mouth. He didn't seem weak when we started walking again, but he did seem very hollow in a way, and didn't want to talk much. Abe held him over he's shoulder so Eddie could watch Becky who was right behind them as we walked. Becky tied to keep he's attension as they went along. “Hey, can you tell me about one of those cartoons you like Eddie?” Becky asked, now and again touching he's little hand that was handing over on Abe's back. “Uh... Which one?” Eddie said, in a very grogy voice. “Anyone, uh how about the last one you saw before we left?” Eddie thought for a moment then sunk he's head. “I can't remember... I think it was about two flies, and they go into this evil spider's hotell, but I don't remember how it ends...” “That's good. Well how do you think it should have ended?” And their converstaion went on and on like that. And the rest of the day flown by in a mostly sick fluffy, I probably couldn't remember it even if you asked me too. We slept fine, ate ok. The dark of the night seemed a lot safer then it did the night before the last one, but that's only saying so much. They day after that, well now that was something else.

The start of that day was just like the others. Only now the sun shown even more. It was still farely wet inside the forest. We ate, Eddie seemed a little better so Abe let him walk with us, but he didn't want to run ahead at all. Now Caleb was looking a little sickly, and I wasn't feeling too great either. But when I'd say it was about 1 PM or so, we could see the distance of the end of the forest in our sights. Abe looked to us and grinned, Becky thanked God right then and there. Caleb smiled a little too himself and I grabbed he's hand and smiled too. And Eddie looked out, yelled joyasly and run past the rest of us, nearly slipping on wet leafs too get too the end of the forest. And when we all followed him to the end of the forest, all of even Caleb gasped.

In front of us was a farely deep creek with lots of rocks to both sides, and going father down to the left, there was lots of sand to the sides as well. It was so beautful in the sunlight, and you didn't even have to get that close to see that there where little fish in the creek going along their given path. From where we all stood, we couldn't see either end of the creek, it seemed never-ending from here. Beyond the other side of the creek There was a tree here and there, and we could see many far past in the distace, but it would be a while of a walk to get to there anyway. The best part in my opnion was the two dogwood trees sitting about 5 feet from the creek. Their whiteness shown very fine in the nature we where around. 

When we got there, and after we where done looking around, Becky turned over to Abe and they had a slient conversaion for a second, till Abe looked back to me and Caleb, then called Eddie over to him and said to all of us. “I guess we could all us a break from walking. So how about we spend the rest of the day here, to wash and rest. And in the next morning we can head off, we'll follow the creek for a while till we find other people and they can tell us where we're at. How does that sound to you guys?” And of course we all loved the idea, me and Eddie even begged to stay.

It never really came to my mind just how boring this hole thing was up too this point. The day too day I mean. Just walking, eating, sleeping, or talking. When we stayed near the creek for the rest of that day, it was like a mimi vacasion. Eddie really did brighten up and he played in the sand besides the water, and made little sand forts. Caleb didn't join him, but he did fule and give ideas for what he's forts could look like, too protect he's little men and women from attackers. I joined in on that a little, but mostly just very very small things like taking a nap or trying to climb one of those two dogwood trees near by. Becky slept a lot, which wasn't too suprising. And for most of it Abe looked like he wanted too sleep too but of course didn't want no one watching us little ones. At one point I was sitting next to him, farther away from the creek then anyone, and he looked tired as it gets. And at some point I asked “Do you think we're going to find a anouther town soon?” Abe stayed quite for a miniture then signed. “Probably not, but we may be able too find a very small group of houses soon. There aren't really any big towns in this state. We'll probably have too get too Kentucky before I can find I anouther person too drive us. The next time I'm going to go looking in a town, I'll pay them upfront. The last man just did it from the kindness of he's heart. But We're going at a good rate so we have enough money too pay for a ride, and buy some more food too. First I just gotta sell my clothes.” I gasped and turned my head over to him. “Your clothes?!” Abe's back hunched over and laughed. “No no, Some clothes I have in my suit case, not the ones I'm wearing.” “Ohh... Sorry.” Abe waved he's hand, then looked over to me and then got a sorry look on he's face. “Oh your dress is looking.. eh....” I looked down at myself and blushed. “Sorry, I know you didn't mean too fall down Deb.” My dress was caked in mut here and there, earlyer I started washing it in the creek a little while I was still wearing it, but I couldn't really do much. I hated too say it but all of us where starting too smell bad, mainly Becky and Abe. I'm kind of surprised Becky, or really any of us, never commented on it. But there's only so much we could do. Eddie was the only one who fully washed himself in the creek, but none of us wanted too get naked in a random creek of West Virginia I guess. Maybe we where a little too up tight. This did come too our minds at some point, and just when it was getting red in the sky, Abe said we might as well wash our bodies while we could, even if we couldn't change our clothes. Abe Caleb and Eddie went off into the forest and waited for me and Becky too wash oursleves. I didn't like being naked outside, Becky said I once swimed in my underwear outside with some other girls 2 years ago, but again, but I got too up tight. Becky didn't seem to mind much but she did wash up rather quick, so maybe I was wrong. It felt bad putting on dirty clothes when we where more clean, but there wasn't anything do be done about it. Abe says he doesn't want to sell dirty clothes. So when me and Becky got done we went into the woods to sell out brothers it was their turns. So they went off and we waited in the forest for them to get done. By then it was nearly dark, so you would have thought they would have been very quick about it, but I think they took a lot longer then me and Becky did. We fixed each other's hair while we waited, oh gosh Becky had very nice black hair, back then I prayed mine would be as thick and as lovely as hers. I told her that then and she said I wouldn't have too worry about that, and that Ante Lois had thick hair that was the same color as mine, and her hair was beautful. “And besides.” Becky laughed. “I've heard more people like bloudes anyway.” At some point the boys came to get us. By then it was actually dark, really it was a little scary sitting there waiting for them by outselves, I forgot how safe the boys made me feel. When Abe peeked he's head out of the trees, for a second I was scard, and felt the fear uncertain primitive men felt long ago. But of course it was him, and he grabbed Becky's and my hand and with a smile in he's voice he said. “I have great news, follow me.” “Ohh, ok!” Becky laughed. And he lead us out of the forest and back too the now dark creek, where the only thing that shined was the light coming from the moon, and out new flaming yellow fire. You'd never think a 8 year old girl would be over a fire, you should have seen it! I ran over to it and floped down next too it so close it should have burned my knees. Caleb was sitting next too it with he's hands on he's folded legs in the Idian possision, like he was very proud of himself. And Eddie was staring at it like the fire was telling him a coller gripping story. Abe held her thin hand and in he's large one while they walked up too us smiling, like a proud couple more then two siblngs. “Yeah.” Caleb laughed as we all sat down around the fire. “I had too teach Abe how to build this thing, now I guess we can do it most every night.” He exspalined with pride. “Why didn't you do it before?” I asked turning my head away from the fire. “Well, I guess we just never had the time too do it, or we didn't think of it much. I know how to do it I just can't make my hands work right.” Caleb signed at my question. “Yeah, I probably should have known how before now.” Abe laughed, removing he's shoes from he's feet and placing them close to the fire. “How long can it stay?” Eddie asked, still looking close into the flames. Caleb looked over to the woods. “Eh, I don't know. Let's try to sleep before it fully go's out, but if none of us are we can always find more sticks and wood too keep it going, we're next to a forest after all.” It didn't long for us too sleep that night, in fact we felt so warm that we forgot to eat dinner that night, and had to do it in the morning instead as too make up for it.

The next few days held intrest, but not all that much. Sadly in the morning we had to leave the trees, it really was pretty in the morning. We did stay a little long in our beded spot then we normally did up until then. Because we where getting a little low on water, and Abe wanted to try out boiling the creek water then storing it away in our suplies suit case where out old water used too be, because now we all had fire. But around what I guess was 1 pm, we left, I kept one of the white bolloms from the dogwood trees in my hand almost the hole day. Well, we didn't leave the creek, in fact though the next two days we walked right beside it the hole day and night. We didn't see or do much that first day beside the creek, and the night didn't bring too much intrest either. We did however had our first outdoor cooked meal, that was honeslty enjoyable. Our dad always wanted to take us camping too crazy places, but of course there where too many of us, and he was too sick, and mom couldn't do it all by herself. But we did use too visit out grandfather in Virginia before he died, and he lived all around the forest much like the places we had been walking past. I hoped we'd go through the state of Virginia as we went, but I dougted it. That night I let my blossom go because it had gotten so dry and dead.

The next morning was much like the last, but we of course had gotten up and walking much sooner. I think our legs where finally getting used to all of the walking now, at least somewhat. But I had no idea what strange things this hole quest was going to do on our bodies. Eddie seemed very happy that day, something about that creek gave him more of a joy then it did for the rest of us, he always walked closer to it then he did too us. None of us had much to say that day to each other, in a peaceful way, and the habit would hauht us forever I might had, the idea that you only have too speak when you actually have too, not sure if I like that about our adult selves or not, it's just who we are now and it is what it is. That night went well, up till we had all eaten and where getting ready for bed- uh, grass? Sleep, yes sleep. Becky was laying on the grass with her arms resting apove her and giving her head support, it looked very unlady like but it felt good, and lady like manours are for house people anyway, as nice as they may be. Me and Caleb said a few words too each other, Eddie was half way asleep right next too me on the ground, and Abe was putting out the fire, because it wasn't cold that night and he didn't feel safe leaving it out when Eddie was around and he was asleep, he told me once. Then a noise I had never heard before hit my ears, and my heart stopped and my head lifted up like a listening rabbit. I heard screams and yells, but they where not human, no they where from animals. The joyish nashing those things used for their languse, whatever they where. “Are those...” Caleb wispered to me, like if he spoke loud again they'd find us. “Wovles?...” “No.” Abe said as he moved in close too us, and pulled us all closer togester, with him on one side and Becky on the other. “Those are coyotes.” He wispered as he starting making the now dead fire again. “No Abe please!” I quictely begged. “They'll see the fire.” Abe shook he's head. “Let them see it, they won't like the fire.” “Oh, coyotes can't be that bad.” Caleb said, mainly to himself. While he said that Eddie had fully sat up, and was now leaning into me with he's little hands around my skinny arm, I could even feel him shivering agenst me. Abe glanced over to he's next oldest brother with a bothered look. “Don't say that Caleb, I know enough about them too not like em.” Becky had not looken up from her spot on the ground, but she seemed to be listening well and said in a tired voice. “There's 5 of us, so we should be fine. If we all stay close..” That only made Eddie move in closer too me, and I didn't mind at all. “Maybe we should stay out of the forest till we get out of West Virginia...” Caleb said looking around, as the coyotes screems went on and on through the night.

Now, the next day was intresting enough. Morning was the same as all the others, man I was sure starting too like that fire a lot. But after the sun had fully settuled into day, the creek had slowly died into a puddle, or I guess if we went the other way it would be the puddle birthed a creek, either way our water was gone now. Birds seemed less loud that day as well, really all around it was more quite, till it was the middle of the day. See during the middle of the day, the land we where walking on started going more down and down, a hill I mean, it was going downhill. And from far away, we could see a wooden house and a smaller shed. Abe moved all of us a little deeper into the near by trees, while we all looked out at the shed. “I don't think anyone in there will want to take us anywhere but back home, so we better walk around the house then go back on our straght path.” We all agreed on that, and going through the thick forest we walked all the way around the house and shed, and slowly moved back onto the path we where on before. And once we had gotten out of that area, the trees got more and more father appart, but that was somewhat because we where starting to go uphill. At first we looked for a way too go around it, but the hill seemed like it went around a long long ways, and Abe said we should try our best to go into a straght line, and don't go off corse. So we started going up the hill, and up and up. It seemed like there where hills stacked on hills. It felt like we where going no where for a long time, every 1 feet we walked felt like 2 feet. Soon I got so tired that Abe had to carry me for the last 40 minitures of the day. And by then it was getting dark, Becky complained about having to sleep on such a steap hill, through we where all so tired the rest of us didn't seem bothered by that idea. Then right when we where all getting ready to bed down for the night, Caleb's head popped up and he looked ahead just like a rabbit's. “Hey... hey keep going.” We all turned over to him as he started lightly running ahead of us. Abe looked at me with cirules under he's young eyes, shrugged and put me down as we all followed him, though not running. When we met him, we all saw what he was looking at before and now. Apparently our probably 5 hour long up the hill walk had payed off, and we where at the very top of the hill- no, it was a mountain more like. We should have been able to see everything around for miles ahead of us, but it was so dark, all we saw where shapes. I could feel a mix of disapointment and wonder come though all of us, and of course Abe was the one to break it when he let go of he's suitcase full of sellables and clapped he's heads tougether in a distinctly adult manour, and said with a tired yet upbeat voice. “Well, we did great today. I told you walking up the hill was a good idea.” And with that he flopped on the ground and signed loudly, me and Eddie laid down next to him, while Becky and Caleb looked down at us dissaprovenly. “If we could see where we are, that would be nice.” Becky signed, and Caleb started looking around for wood, and through there where trees till around everywhere, there wasn't much sticks and broken bark and other lose wood laying around. “I'll go and make a fire.” Caleb said as he got a little far away from the rest of us, to my suprise Abe nore Becky watched after him when he got nearly out of sight, they where so tired. “Please do, it's so cold. And there may still be coyotes out here.” Becky said, and Eddie moved in closer to Abe and me. “Oh I'm sure there are, but again I don't think they'd attack 5 humans. But I still like a fire right about now. It seems a lot colder tonight then it did yesterday.” And Abe was right, it was a lot colder tonight then it was yesterday. In fact I'd say this was our coldest night yet. Most nights before the fire we all had to huddle in close. When we where sleeping in the small black car, our body heats helped warm up the car overtime if we kept all the doors shut for a while. But even when Caleb found what he needed and we had our fire. It didn't seem to make us feel that much better. At least we ate well and slept even better, in fact we woke up rather late we slept so well, but when you aren't going to school or Chruch anymore, that wasn't too important.  In the morning we saw the view of the mountain top all for ourselves in it's full glorly. And then it was only proof that all great landscape and romatic painters are just ripping off God's work, given how beautful and real it was then. Felt like I could walk anywhere I wanted, and be anywhere I wanted to be. On all derections the veiw shown nothing but trees, a thick forest where we where going, all dark green and noisy too. And even father into the distace, we could see even more larger mountains, and then they looked like monsters that any second now would rise from their sleep. Really a lot of the distate mountrians did look like the backs of dogs while they slept. It looked like we had a long long way to go till we got to where we wanted to go, or till we got out of state. It was really then, that I started to hate this unknown cousin that will be taking care of us. Who'd let a bunch of kids walk across America to get too you? Who was this horible horible man? And why did he care so little for our safey? And yet let us live with him.  

The next 3 days whern't much better, in fact they where worse in most ways. We didn't have to walk up a mountian again, but going through hills was comon. And Abe said walking around them would throw us off course so that was also a hurdle. They was a time when one second we where on flat ground, the next seddenly a wall of dirt was in front of us, and of course we couldn't go up that beast, so we had to walk around it. We walked around it for nearly half a hour till we could start going up again. It felt like a huge waste of time. And there was the coyote problem. At night they gotten louder and louder. It felt like they where getting closer and closer, and on the night of the third day, they where so loud and so close all monsters and beasts in the world felt real to me then. Then there was our health, and what are you without your health? That day we took a break near the creek seemed to do us some good for a while. But our bodies seemed worse off then they ever had before. We really needed a break day again. One time Caleb told Abe this, that we wheren't doing great, mainly Eddie and myself, and we all needed to take a day off again. But Abe said he didn't feel safe in this forest, and the second we where fully away from this one, we would rest. No one liked that awnser but we all understood and felt it. We wheren't safe, we where like children in a fairytail, and our crime was leaving home. Our crime was not wanting to be apart, but what could I say? We where the only family we had left. Abe and Becky where my parents, Caleb was my best friend, and Eddie was my child. How could I leave my parents, my best friend and my child? They are not siblings too me, they are a real part of who I am that I could not and will not let go, and apprently that is my crime. And this is my punishment. Again, back to the health. It was true that me and Eddie where worse for wear then the others where. Abe and Becky had to switch between carring both of us, but Becky wasn't as strong as her twin so Abe had to do most of the heavy-lifting. Eddie by halfway through the day was too tired to walk at all. I wasn't doing much better either. I slept longer and longer, my eyes didn't want to stay open long. And my legs oh! My legs. They always looked red from the knee down. If I didn't walk for longer then 20 minitures they felt prickly and odd, and when I was walking on them they felt numb, and a few times throughout the 3 days I tripped over myself I was so numb. And I wanted to eat less and less, and my head started to hurt badly every morning and night. Morning because of where I slept, and night because of all of the walking. One night, I felt honest to God sick, and through I don't remember much I was told I started crying for mother to help me I felt so badly, like she used to do before she died. At least I felt better that morning.  Abe had to carry heavy things so often every day, that at night when he didn't have too anymore he would spread he's arms out on the ground and look up at the sky like he was trying to make a snow agnle in the grass. But really that was the only way he could lay that would make he's legs and arms not hurt, while he's mind could sleep. He always had bangs under he's eyes, and while he walked most days he's eyes wouldn't even be open as he went along. But he never complained for looked outwardly sad in front of any of us, but that didn't stop him from walking slower every day, holding up someone a little lower, and breathing quiter every single day. Becky's health didn't seem to bad, through her already thin body seemed thinner then before, I don't think she wanted to eat much like Eddie and me, really the two older boys often ate while they watched us sleep or do nothing. But Becky did seem very very sad. It was unnatural for her to look like this. She never really talked to us or payed any mind to us unless she had too. She just seemed sad. Like someone she loved had just died. I don't know, maybe that was her problem, it's not like any of us had any real time to mourn, and the twins just had to push on right through it without complaint. The one in the best of health of Caleb by far. In fact, if it wasn't for the fact he like the rest of us, is farely dirty from never being able to bathe, he may even look better then he did before he left. Surely he's legs where killing him, but in a strong sort of lifely way. Like he was young and had many good years ahead of himself. He's bloudie hair had started growing longer too, faster then the rest of us here. And the white strains looked less noticable. And of course I didn't think of this back then, or even really would know what it means, but later in life I would think back on how it seemed he's soul seemed more free. Like the burton of what he's father had left him had been taken off of him for a while. Sorry, what I mean by that is- well, when mom and dad died, they didn't die at the same time. The crash killed mom the second It happened from what I heard, and her death was peaceful- well, quick anyway. But, now I wasn't told this when I was 8 of course, but my father's wasn't. And others have spared me from the details even as a adult, from what I know he was in the hosbital for 2 days before he left us, the old fighter he was, he lived so long with he's illness, and he didn't want to leave he's kids alone. But while me Becky and Eddie stayed home, he wanted Abe and Caleb to see him the day he left, to talk to them. I don't know what happened much, but I do know that the boys did watch him die, which was probably the way he wanted it too. He always believe that a man can't be strong if he doesn't go through something ruff. I can't really comment on weather or not I like how that ended, too much too it I suppose. Anyway, Caleb seemed more happy before that happened, and back then I hoped in a year's time or so, he'd be back to normal. In later dates I chucked up some of he's behvour too being a teenager, and some of it was but... Anyway, he was well then, and it was nice to see someone in good health. Mainly the one who before was in the worse. But even him didn't talk much, none of us did. None of us felt like it. But I do think we all had a lot to say about everything, there was a lot too talk out really. We where all surely rethinking a lot.    Then we got too the forth day. In the early morning we had gotten up at about the normal time, even if we where all looking dead tired. We walked for about 30 minitures till we saw it. Finally we found a anouther town, it just seemed to pop out of no where, one miniture all we saw where trees, the next we where all at the back of the town. 

Like the last town we where at, it was small and looked a little behind the times. Through this one was quite a big bigger, but even more behind the times. From here there didn't seem too be many buildings, or stores and the such. And all the homes for the most part where old and wooden, but they looked strong. Surely the homes where build in the late 18^th century. Abe and Becky decided that it was probably safe for us too walk through out the town, and hopefully no one would ask why 5 dirty kids they never seen before walking around. But we all stayed close together. That day Eddie looked so tired that Abe and Becky had to hold both of he's hands while we walked, Abe didn't want others to see him carrying a small child and ask questions. We actually walked around the town for a while looking around for somewhere to sell some clothes and buy some food. But after about a hour of walking around seeing nothing, so decideing to take a break we all sat down on some very old benches besides a food store. It seemed very very empty, and there didn't really seem to be any people really walking around at all. “Well, let's face it.” Abe said with a sign. “I haven't seen a singal car drive by since we had gotten here, so that surely means we won't be able to find anyone that can take us out of this state. So I say we just wait to sell our spare clothes till we get to somewhere that will pay better, and we'll spend the rest of the day here to rest, ask around to see how much father we have till we're out of West Virginia, then we'll get out of here and sleep in the woods.” Becky gave him a odd look as she leaned up to look at him. “Why not sleep in town?” “Because, we're a lot safer in the woods then we are here.” Abe said with he's eyes shut. Caleb shook he's head but didn't comment. Eddie really did look dead as he leaned up agant me, he always looked tired lately. “Maybe with the money we still have, we could ask someone to let us sleep in a house for the night? We could all use it.” Becky suggested but Abe shook he's head. “No, it wouldn't be worth the money. We can rest when we're in Texas.” “No, this isn't a race it's a marathon. And we really need a break. This is starting to get to be too much.” “Well maybe it's too much for you, but trust me I know what I'm doing.” Becky made some kind of angery noise, whatever it was is up too you. Then suddenly Eddie opened he's eyes too look out where we where. “What day is it?...” The question he asked catuch us all off garud, and Abe shrugged he's shoulders. “I don't know, nither day or month.” “Wait a minitue, I got a idea.” Caleb said as he sat up. “What?” We all said, but Eddie. “If today isn't a Sunday, maybe we can sleep in any near by Churchs.” The twins took a glance at each other, but looked back. “It seemed in bad taste too... break into a Chruch.” Abe said, like he was walking on egg shells. “How is it in bad taste? 5 homeless children needed a place to sleep at night. I'm sure God wouldn't mind.” Caleb waved he's hand, which seemed to bother Abe in some way. “Your swisting it Caleb.” “No I'm not, it's fine I'm sure.” “Listen.” Becky said in a loud voice. “We'll go look for one now, I'm sure it's near the other end of town, because I think I saw one before here. And if we do end up finding it then we'll stay in there for the rest of the day. Sound good?” Well no one dissagreed with that, and we all stayed there quite there for a little while, till after about half of hour of waiting around tired sitting and boredom, we all felt rested enough then we where off again.

Goof for us, but bad for Abe's pride we did find the Church. It was a good deal far away from any home, but there was still a small grass road going across a field, and when we all catch sight of the home far off Eddie's little head, before resting on Abe's chest looked up and actually smiled, he actually smiled oh God, it was nice too see then, really it was. But that was all that he did, no words or movements or trying to be let go so he could run over to the holy building like he would have done in the past. And he did do it in the past, when on every Sunday dad would park us close to the Church we always went too, so Eddie wouldn't get sweaty running over to the building. He always thought it was great fun playing with the other kids and running around inside before the bell rang and he needed to be good. Oh how he gave up those friends so willingly, and held onto us after mom and dad went to Heaven. All of he's good school mates he used to spend all of he's free time with that he'll never see again, and he let go of them so freely to have us. Never trust anyone who says children are always selfish, because children no matter how young they are, are people too. And are a great deal more honest and true then some adults are. Anyhow, when we all gotten to the front of the building we all paulsed. The color of the Church was a light brown. It was of a farely big size but was still cheep. Actually the odd thing about it was that the back of it was made of bricks. I believe now that in the the Church was all wooden and proud, but one day the back for some odd reason started to rot, and instead of getting rid of the hole building, they redid the back of it with brick. I'd say this was added in the last 2 decades, while the wooden parts where first made and later added in the mid 18^th century, because it as a hole seemed plenty old. Anyway the front door wasn't as cheep as the rest. It seemed to have a lot more glory put into it then the walls. A little more design and love. Abe looked down to me and gave me a wink. I known what that meant and I reached up and with a lot of work, pushed the front door open as a long groen lightly called inside. You could taste the dust coming to us. It wasn't dark fully inside, and the windows where so high above the lot of us that not even Abe could reach them. We probably seemed oddly happy coming into that dirty Church, more happy then most children would be. Now it wasn't so dustly that you couldn't tell that people come here every Sunday, it just didn't look like anyone ever really bothers to clean the poor old dog. All the colors in the building where a deadly gray, in fact the color was so strong that it reflected off onto us so that even my yellow hair looked like a old woman's. Liek well behaved birds we all lined up on one front row of the seats, like we wanted to be close to a preacher that was not there. And it wasn't long till we sat in a way that wasn't very Church like, but then again we did look too dirty too be there anyway, hopely God would understand. Eddie laid down like it was a bed, through he didn't turn as soon as he laid down, in fact it looked like he died. Almost like he was a injered solder who after wondering a long time, couldn't find help by earth but only by God, and decied to die here. Becky and Abe leaned back on the seat and fell asleep like tired old people who didn't even mean to do so. And that left Caleb and me. Soon we could clearly see that we where the only ones that where not going to sleep anytime soon, so quitely he slid off the bench and took and hand and we walked all the way to the back of the building so we could talk a little louder without waking those poor souls put. We hid in the very back corner and leaned real close together like we where about to say something that shouldn't be said in a holy building. “They don't look so well Deb.” Oh, it was nice to hear my name, I haven't heard it in a while till then. “No, they don't. Poor Eddie.” “Eddie is the worst I'd say. Before we leave this town, we must learn the day so we can all take break every Sunday. We can't keep going like this.” “Do you think Abe will do that? He seems to want and just... get there in a day.” “Oh! Abe is a 30 year old in the body of a 13 year old.” Caleb said, a little too loud. “Yes, your right.” I wined in a young girlish voice, that sure showed my age. “Yes Deb, but he'll have too. If he says we can't stop once a week, then by God I'll hold Eddie too the ground and tell Abe we're not moving for the day.” I laughed but it took me a moment too know what to day next. “We're not getting to Texas like this. By then.. we'll, well be dead. And what good are we too each other dead?” I looked over to him worried like. “No good, that's what. I'm not even sure we're in West Virginia or out of it. I think we're still in it anyhow. What I wonder is, given how we taveled at a angle, when we get out will we find ourselves in Virginia or Kentucky.” “I hope Kentucky, I don't want to be in Virginia ever again...” we stayed quite for a momemt, because we both known why we felt that way, Virginia had nothing left to give us, that's where our happy, full family was. “And besides!” Caleb said with a odd amout of cheer in he's voice, it helped me remember that he was Abe's brother after all. “If we end up in Kentucky, we'll be closer to our goal. The best way would be from Kentucky, to Tennessee or Missouri, to Arkansas and then finally to Texas.” “Those are just states, it doesn't really matter which one we're in till we're in Texas.” “Yeah I know Deb, I'm just trying to think it out logically. I never really known how big America is till now.” “Me too... Does Abe even know where in Texas this cousin lives anyway?” “All I know is that he lives on the edge of the state, I don't understand why the guy couldn't just set up a meeting place so it could save us the pain. I guess he doesn't really care about us...” “I was thinking that before too, I just don't understand it.” Caleb noded and I leaned my head onto he's shoulder. “What I wonder is, does this cousin of ours have bad intensions. I mean, who'd have the kindness to take in 5 parentless kids, but the cruleness to let those kids walk half way across America by themselves.” Caleb said, sounding very grown up I might say. “What bad things? You mean like make us do hard work all day- or or, clean up he's house or something?” “That's not really what I had in mind, but- well I don't know, we'll just have to see, and that's the problem.” “Yeah... Hey what was he's name again?” “I don't remember, I can't even remember he's last name though I know he was on dad's side of the family. At least I think I know.” “I don't even remember hearing about him till now Caleb, how did Abe even know he was a good person to send a letter of help too?” “Not sure, what I wonder is what was in that letter Abe sent, and if he offered anything. “Oh, I hope he didn't offer anything bad.” “Well, if he just offered that he'll, Abe, will work a job to pay for us living their, and maybe me when I get older, that's fine I don't got a problem with that. I just... I just wonder how far he'll go to make sure we're all living together.” “Is that a bad thing?” “No, no not at all. But, well you know how some moms don't want their sons going off and making a home for themeleves? Or how some dads don't want their daughters to marry, and how those kinds of parents think if their children make a life for themeleves then they'll be left behind? Well I sometimes wonder if Abe will be the same way with us when we get older. Sure Becky is the closest to him but I don't think we can judge by her because their twins. But, well I don't know...” “I.. I hope not.” I at the time really had no clue what he was talking about, all I known is Caleb was trying to tell me not to trust Abe and I for one didn't like that idea, because I did and still do trust Abe with my life. But I still heard what Caleb had to say. “I guess there's nothing we can do but stand our ground if he ever gets like that. Listen I know that look your giving me, and I know you love Abe a lot, and I do too really, but he's human too you know? And he's has a lot going on right now and sometimes people mess up under presure.” All I could do was nod to what he was saying, because I had nothing to add to that. After he finished he got quite and nither of us spoke, and that sort of made the smell problem worse. All of us being in a small building really pointed out how badly we smelled. We smelled really bad. Sure through we needed a anouther one, that creek bath helped us look a little less homeless then before, it barely helped our smell at all, soon we started to smell just like animals. And none of us where really outdoorly wild children so this was unknow to us. The worst of us was Abe, and he's smell was so bad that it spread onto Eddie in a really bad fashion. It was so bad that I was worried by the next sunday people could still smell the last signs that we had been there, now I really hoped God wouldn't mind us being here like this. And if that wasn't enough, we needed more food. We when't horriblely low but it was getting scary, and when your feeding 5 people things can get low very very quickly. Since we had been able to boil water I don't think water will ever be a poblem again. 

As my head was leaning on Caleb's shoulder, it started to rain outside loudly, and I was worried the Church would leak it was so bad, but this old building had probably weathered many bad storms. My thin dress started to fell even thinner since we had gotten out here. We stayed there quite so long that I wondered if he was asleep, and he probably wondered the same thing about me. But at some point Abe Becky and sort of Eddie woke up, and we all gathered around in a circle and ate our dinner, it was so loud outside that none of us talked all that much. Becky brought forth the idea of us sort of showing in the rain, but Abe shook down that idea for whatever reason, maybe he just didn't like the idea of our clothes getting wet, I don't know. We all slept on the benches of course, I was kind of surprised of how easyly the twins and Eddie went back to sleep. Caleb and me talked a little bit more again before we fell asleep on each other. The bench was so hard, if it wasn't for the fact that it was still pouring outside, I would have wanted to sleep on the grass again. This night Eddie wanted to sleep next to me, and it took me a while to fall to sleep after he did. I was leaning on Caleb, and Eddie was leaning on me. And while he did he looked like death, all pale and still, Caleb and me took a few glances at each other every time it took him a second to breath at a normal speed every now and then, and finally we agreed on protecting Eddie from Abe's need to walk every singal day, through we didn't have to agree too that verbally, all we had to do was look at each other and we known, and that night I aged a few more years beyond my days.

Chapter 5

That morning was better then the night for sure. It wasn't raining anymore thank God, and all of the grass in the near by fields where flushed yellow from all the water it had gotten the night before. The twins seemed a little sickly that morning, and didn't want to get up. Me and Caleb felt pretty refreshed when our eyes opened, but Eddie through unlike the twins he was awake well enough all he seemingly wanted to do was sit on the bench and watch me and Caleb work. Since me and Caleb where the only ones that could do much of anything at the time, we where the ones to set up breakfast that morning, and we tried to make it fancy too though he had to eat little. It made me think back to our last good meal back in the blue house, how long had it been since we left? Felt like half a year by now. Anyway Caleb said since the others didn't look well, it would be nice to actually cook them a meal today, I stayed inside to watch Eddie while he tried to make a fire outside, but 10 minitures later he came back and said it was a hopeless afare, and he gave up and we all ate cold beans, oh too this day I try and eat everything cooked, I even warm up my milk, you don't know what your missing till it's gone. We left out Becky and Abe's meals for when they where ready to eat. But after he was done Eddie seemed to be more awake, so me and Caleb helped move him out of the building and onto the front steps of the Church so he could get some fresh air without standing up. Not that he needed more fresh  air, just that that church was so dusty and old that I'm sure it wasn't good for him. Soon after a while Eddie started rocking back and forth and tapping he's feet on the ground while looking around at where he was, coming back to life like a flower. “I wanna watch TV!” Eddie said suddenly, loudly too but there was a hint of illness in he's voice. “Me too...” Caleb signed and I shot him a dirty look. “When we get in Texas, maybe he'll have a TV and then you can watch something.” I said while looking at my dirty shoes. “I want to go back home, this isn't very fun Deb.” “Our new home is in Texas Eddie. So we are going home, it's just taking a while.” Eddie made some kind of dissapointed noise but I can't really dscribe it. “I don't see why your not happy about going there.” Caleb said with little emionon in he's voice. “Texas is where all the cowboys went.” Eddie seemed to think about this a little more but didn't comment on that, through it did make me stop talking about not wanting to go there. “Will it be really hot?” Eddie asked, he's hands on he's thin little nhess. “Well, it's on the edge of the state so I guess so, but how much I have no clue.” Caleb awnsered. “Wow, it'll be so hot I'll have to be with no shirt on every time I go outside!” Eddie mused, he seems to have this natural disliking of clothes from a young age, this us having to sleep on the cold ground as of late he's probably starting to see more of the point of them as of late. “No that's a bad idea. You'll get a sunburn doing that, when it's really hot you need to protect your skin.” Caleb corected him but Eddie was lost in he's thoughts so he had nothing to anwer that with. I guess Eddie forgot the hole reason those men in westerns even had hats on.

Abe and Becky woke up soon after that, they seemed scard when they saw us outside alone, apprently in their minds we had went missing, and they had just found us. That day before we had left the town, Caleb told Abe of Eddie's poor state and demanded that they ask a person who lives here we're we where and what day of the week and month it was. So after a time we found a bored looking man and asked him all of those questions, and he awnsered in a bothered tone. Apparently, we where in Kentucky now! Now just far deep we didn't know, but this seemed to please Abe a lot, he's course was right. Acording to the month we where at now, we had been gone from the blue house for 2 months now, which seemed like a year ago to me back when I was that young. And the day was Saturday, and that did not make Abe happy, but he thanked the man none the less for helping us. After that we high tailed it out of that town we did not know well. The rest of that day, well there really wasn't anything to say on it. We walked through fields and soon by the end of the night we gotten back into a forest once again. The ground was still wet from the rain but we made it past the other nights.

I wish I could tell you more about the next week and a half after that day, but there isn't really anything of intrest that I can remember. Every Sunday that passed, no matter how unpleasant the place was, Caleb made sure we all did nothing that day, and he kept stract of the day itself well. The daily bore of doing nothing but walking and sometimes talking every singal day was becoming more bareable. It was hard to even notice weather I was bored or intrested at any given time, we all just kind of slid into this new habbet of ours. The world had become both deathly gray and sad. But it was also very colorful, because of the nature and world that was around us. I guess, the world was beautful, and the people where gray. Really our grayness had started to infect our ablity too be truly nice to each other. It was a little sad, I don't know. Anyway the week and a half went by without anything intresting, till the 10^th day, when after trying to stay out of the forest, we found a aouther city, a real actually city, large and scary, and full of busy bright faced people. The city was very modern as well, very very modern in fact, the people inside of the city looked modern as too. In fact the people there so upidy and friendly that Abe didn't want us walking too much in the open, because people may start asking questions on what 5 dirty kids are doing. Since we had finally found a aouther town that means our goal for the day was to sell the rest of the unused clothes we had, and hopefully using that money to buy out someone to drive us as close to Texas as they could. Right now after around 2 hours of walking, Abe sat us all down at 2 different benches that where right next to each other. The place around the 2 benches was unique, pleasant mostly. We where in what I guess was a park in the middle of the city, it was a very big park too, probably almost split the city in half it was so big. There wasn't a walkway through the park but there was landmarks that told you we're you where. There was a fare amout of people there that day, but it was better then on the streets where it seemed veryone had somewhere to go. There was a lot of yellow flowers around the benches-well actually they where tenically weeds, but I don't consider anything pretty to be a weed, unless it's a person maybe. They really help onto my eyes then because through most of the places we'd been through as of late didn't have flowers, and I had forgotten how much I loved them. My mom used to take care of many flowers around our house, but her favorite was orange roses, she said they where the most romantic flower of them all. The day we left there she had been dead long enough to where the roses we looking ill. I hope Texas has some nice planets. Abe was looking off into the distance, far enough off that it looked like he was having a no blink contest with the only building in sight. Becky was a little busy trying to fix herself up as much as she could, and a few times she tried fixing up her twin, but Abe would swat her hand away from him and go back to he's staring contest. Caleb didn't do anything but stare at he's feet. We had been with each other alone so long all of us, that I forgot when others he doesn't know or trust could be around he doesn't speak. He hardly said anything when we where in the little black car, but really none of us did. And Eddie was asleep again, he's skin was looking less pale, and he's under eyes where less dark, but he still seemed sick, or maybe just tired. Because Abe didn't want people seeing him carrying around a small sick looking child, Eddie had to walk all day long.  Then our very important bussness of doing nothing was inturupted by someone standing in front of our two benches. The person was a 20 some year old woman, she had a dress that went below her knees no sleeves. She had short bloundiesh fluffy hair and a small round face that looked some what worried. She stood there saying nothing for a weirdly long time, and Abe stragtianed up and said. “Hello? Do you need something?” She made a quick mouth sound then in a somewhat posh voice she said. “Are you children ok?” Abe looked over to Becky then awnsered. “Yes, we're fine. Do you need something?” “No... Where are your parents?” Abe made a face and he's shoulders risen. “That's not your bussness.” I glanced over to him, I never heard him speak so poorly to a adult. She didn't say anything back, and she stayed there so long that Becky woke up Eddie and we all started walking out of the park. For a while I was worried that the lady was following us. 

After we got out of the park Abe made quick work too selling the spare clothes we had, it took him a while to find a place that would buy them for good money, they where Church clothes so that helped up the price. Not we had a pretty good deal of money, but even though he needed more food, Abe wanted to have all of the money now so he could pay off someone to drive us too Texas. Abe had decided to leave the rest of us inside a small gas stasion again, he told us that he would be near by somewhat, but far away enough to where he couldn't see us, so if anything bad happens we'll have to yell for him. So we all waited in the back of the gas sataion. It was very boring too just waiting there. No why tried to be buddy buddy with Becky this time. Eddie got a lot more lively through. He started walking around the store looking for something of intrest, he wasn't as lively as he was back when he used to run around in Church, but it was still nice to see him doing better. Becky was feeling too tired to follow Eddie around the small gas stasion, so she wanted me and Caleb too do that for her. Caleb seemed completty out of it and didn't want to talk or do anything. I just enjoyed following Eddie around and seeing how he was doing. Nothing really seemed all too intresting for Eddie, so he never stopped for very long, but he did look around a lot. The- who I guess was the owner of the gas stasion, didn't say anything, but he did seem to watch Eddie with a older kindness, almost like Eddie was he's grandson for something along those lines. Soon every shelf and item had been looked over, so Eddie asked if he could go outside now and back into the park, I had to tell him no, because Becky wasn't close enough to awnser and Caleb didn't talk in public mostly. He didn't seem to like that so he went back over to Becky and sat down right next to her feet in the middle of the floor. Something that would normally not be allowed if it wasn't for the fact that no one else but us and the owner was there. But there was someone outside of the store, he was leaning on the glass window right outside. It was hard to tell he's age but it was definitly a grown man in some kind of a light grey suit. He kept looking into the window behind himself and left he's eyes on one thing for a second, then looked away again, whatever he was watching I didn't know. I swear it was half a hour before Abe had came back, he seemed tired and somewhat overworked at that. He's hair was wet and he's once clean white shirt clearly needed a wash. If we ever found a nice creek like we did back in West Virginia, then we have too fully wash our clothes too. He was so tired when he got in that he had to lean aganst the wall too stay up so he could talk to us, he's eyes where't even open as he did so. “I... I found someone...” The words stumbled out of he's mouth. “That's good. What about it?” Becky asked. “Well... He said that he could take us in the morning if we meet up at this spot again, by the first sunlight of the morning. I told the guy we had a place to stay, we can stay in the park till morning.” Well at that point it was already dark so that wasn't much of a shook, but still Becky looked worried. While they kept talking we all gotten out of the gas stasion and started walking down the side walk. “That's good, but I'm not sure I like the idea of sleeping in the park, how is that going to work?” Becky asked, Abe just shrugged he's shoulders. “I'll stay up all night, we can sleep when we get in the car, actually he's car is a lot bigger then the last oen we where in.... Oh, and we'll look for the darkest place in the park too sleep, so no one will find us.” “I'm not sure how to feel about that...” Becky mumbled. “I don't like that either.” I mumbled back. “We don't have a chose.” At that point in the night, Abe looked like Moses leading the Jews to freedom, he had such a serius face then, it was scary in a way. The night the world seemed so dark, the only light came from near by homes with warm yellow lights, the moon gave us no aid that day. The twins held us close together all of us, and Eddie looked like he was getting ready to fall down, so even through it was in the city, Abe started carrying him, even through I didn't really think Abe was able to even hold himself up. Every noise and creek sounded like a upcoming danger, something to cower from and hide away in the darkest of corners. Sure it was the darkness that made this so, but it was also that darkness that could and would keep us safe. After this hole 'guest' was over I never quite saw the darkness with the same mindset. The lact of light wasn't something to be feared, it was a tool to be used at one's own will, weather agesnt you or with you.  We got too the park at a very slow speed to say the least, by then all of us where so tired we didn't even bother finding somewhere dark to fall asleep, everyone fell asleep on the benches! Well, everyone but me. I watched them all drift off into dreams with a certain amazment, like 'wow, I can't believe your all this careless!' but then I was only 8, and that sort of emotion was lost on me, just something that I could feel. That night I hudled in close too Becky's warm safe body and I held onto her pale white arm with my little hands, and barried my face into her side. That night felt oddly unsafe, just this deep gut feeling that said something was coming for you. But nothing did, so I don't understand it. All I know for sure was there was diffinitly something unholy out there that night, and I could feel it.

Chapter 6

I know I stayed awake till at least the black sky was turning a darker blue. But when I did wake up I was in a car of all places! And not only that but it was the middle of the day. Now see that's the problem with being a child, is that no one will bother making sure your ok with something, or checking in on you first. I know why that is now but back then I was somewhat scard and maybe even a little angery I didn't get too see our first meeting with this new driver and new ride. Well anyway when I woke up, we where all in a topless light pink car, the sun hit my face like it was begging me to wake up. There was more space in the back then last time, just enough to where we could all fit in the back if Eddie sat on Abe's lap and I sat on Becky's, with Caleb squished in the middle. It was only then I could really see that we where going down South, the sun was like a character onto itself and it shun such a bright holy golden a painter would feel so ashamed that they could not make something half as good they would quite painting right there and then. In fact since I woken up in such a brightness, I was nearly sure something evil had gotten us when we where asleep and now we where in Heaven, I was so stuck on this idea that I shook my head awake too look at the front driver, and for a second I thought I saw dad and mom in the front seats, like when we all went down to Virginia to see grandpal, dad would have he's eyes fixed on the road and hole body leaning over to it so very focused on it because he was such a focused person (I still to this day don't believe the crash was he's fault, no it was the other driver's.) and mom would be looking out with her bloude hair flowing everywhere, she had hair a lot like dad's sister did, ante Lois. Mom used to always pull her hair into a cloth and wrap it around when we all went on a drive, she probably died like that too come to think of it, shame really, she always looked good like that. For just a amazing second I honestly thought the people in front where our parents, I nearly cried out their names. But then it came to me that dad never had such strong shoulders, and mom never had bloundish short fluffy hair, or such delicate shoulders either. Then I understood they where't who I throught they where, and I sunch back into Becky's lap. “Oh, morning Deb.” Becky said, looking down at me, something about the way she said that sounded like a insult to me, and yeah for a second I was mad at everyone through I didn't know why, but it was just so beautful that morning it was hard to stay that way. The woman at the front of the car turned around to look at me, and to my suprise the woman was the same woman that we saw in the park earlyer yesterday. She looked just as dolled up as she did yesterday, she was wearing the same shape and style of dress, only now it was a bright red and white spots, it fit well with her hair. “Aw, now your all up.” The woman said, smiling. “Well, our youngest isn't.” Abe said in a sorry tone. The woman turned over to look over at Eddie. “Aww, poor kid. He looks so worn out.” The woman turned over to the man driving at the front and tapped on he's arm. “See, isn't he cute?” She asked the man, and the man with a bored face looked over to Eddie then turned back over to the road. “Yeah, he's alright.” the man said. The woman glanced back over to Eddie like she was excited, then looked back over to the road. The place we where driving through seemed very very new too me. I don't think I've seen anywhere like it at that point in my life. Besides a car far behind us and the long never ending road ahead of us, there where no other big man made objects in sight. And there was almost no trees in sight either. And to our left was a tall wide moutain that had must have been cut in half at some point, it looked almost frittening in a way, like it was getting closer and closer to the road, like it was going to crush us at any moment. The grass around the road and moutain was so very green, it looked like it came out of a coloring book! And not only did this place look beautfuly, it also looked empty and lonely. The car we where in was going so fast that too think if we hadn't gotten a ride we would have had to walk all the way across this land on foot scard me horribly. I didn't really feel in the mood to talk then, I was so taken aback from where we all where, but the woman at front again turned over to look just at me, like I was somehow different from the others. “So is your name Debbie or Debra?” I looked up at Becky, and she nodded as to say 'go ahead,' “Debbie, but I'm just called Deb by most people.” The woman nodded. “Shame, Debra is such a smart name, oh well. Anyway I'm Judy, and this-” She tapped her hand on the man's arm again. “Is Arthur. He's my husband.” Judy exsplained with pride. Arthur nodded. Like he's appret wife he was pretty, I wouldn't say handsome but he was pretty. He almost looked like a hollywood type, or at least what a kid would think of a hollywood type back then. The sun glases where not helping. He had really bright brown hair, that was short too. And he had a narrow face like he worked out a little, but not enough to build any actually musucle. He's shirt was short sleeved and a light yellow, it looked designer too. He had rich brown pants too kind of like he's hair, those the pants did look a little older probably about 5 years old or so. Both the man and the woman where probably in their late 20s, and they both had a healthy look to them, made me wonder if they had any kids they where both so pretty. “So Texas huh.” The woman, Judy said. “That's a far away's away from up North. You looking forward too it little girl?” I known she was only talking to me. “Yes. But I hope it isn't too hot.” She nodded and laughed. “Well it is mightly hot, I never liked down near there longer then a week for work, but I do remember it being unpleasant. Oh but your only staying in the up north area right?” I nodded, that was after all, the only info I had on we're on Texas we would be staying. “Well that's better then near Mexico, oh my I don't know how people can stay there let alone let their children grow up in such a horrible place! Don't get me wrong girly the people are nice as pie- if you don't treat them badly but the weather is just awful!” It just came to me then that it probably wouldn't snow in our new home, why I had never throught about that but it was true, oh now I was really wanting to go back to Pennsylvania, it always snowed back home. “Where do you live then?” I asked in a quite voice. “Oh me? Well I was born in Canada but I moved around a lot in the country and America, right now I was staying in North Carolina but had to visit a friend real quick in Kentucky so that's how I met you anyway.” She spoke so fast I could barely understand what she was going on about, all I got out of that was that she was from Canada. “It's a good thing your only from up North, can you imagein how long it would have taken you too get from Alaska too Kentucky on foot?!” Suddenly Abe spoke up, while till looking out at the passing by nature, he's voice sounding more hopeful then before but still very tired. “We had someone drive us before, we haven't been on foot the hole time.” The woman nodded at that. “Well whoever the driver was they couldn't go very fast, why I bet we'll have you in Texas in a day's time.” I did notice then how fast the car was going, it was going almost dangursly fast, if we where driving in a city I'm sure this would be illegal. I also noticed then that now Becky had fallen asleep with me on her, and Eddie was asleep now too, and Caleb was, well awake but he wouldn't talk here so it didn't really matter weather he was up or not. So really me and Abe where the only one's up to talking to this woman. Me and Abe both shared the tired but still lively voice at that time. The idea this car could take us too Texas in a day, while it took us nearly 2 weeks too get out of a state made me feel almost small, and weak in a way. The idea our so far long journey could be fixed so easly was almost a little insulting, that all this effort had been very pointless that the end of it all. Then I started really thinking on this, what if we get found out, and brought back to Pennsylvania we're our biological fathers take us away from each other, and we went through all of this for nothing, and in the end we had to be seperated again. Well even then I known I couldn't let that happen, I started planning out ways too free myself from Mr Envis's large house, and to find my other siblings again. The plan was alaberate too, and was highly up too change but I guess having a plan was better then having no plan, you can look at it like that. The plan also was highly based on hopeing my siblings would wait for me to save them. First, like in a children's book I've surely read before, I would find as many white sheets as I could one day when I was trapped in Mr Envis's house, then in the night I would tie them all together and tie one end too the leg of my bed and throw it out the window. Then once I climbed down I would walk across state lines, just like how I learned too on this journey, only this time I would do it alone! Like a lost solder coming home. Then in order, I would find Eddie and take him along with me, then Caleb and then Abe and Becky. And then we'd have too make a new home somewhere else not in Texas, because they would be looking for us there. Maybe the other way, maybe in Canada. And then we could all get jobs and make a little home for ourselves there, and well, I don't know what would happen after that but I'm sure we'd make it through it, maybe we all could live together for the rest of our lives, and we could bring our new husbands, wifes and children to live in where ever this home was, we could all be like one close family. But then I thought of a small problem in our plan, two actually. One I think I was going to have too get the twins first because they could help me take care of Eddie better, I really wasn't sure I could do that on my own. And two, what if after I go missin would the fathers of my other siblings watch over them more? Making it harder for me too get them? While I was thinking throw my plans, this Jody woman kept on talking about random cit chat. Abe watched her and listened quitely, and Caleb looked at he's shoes.

We drove all throughout the day, but the man at the front, Arthur, seemed to get hungery every 2 hours so we stopped a lot. The endless flat land stransformed into dead dry spicky trees and dead grass, then we entured a small passing of houses, then passed it, then by nightfall we entured a real small city, and Arthur at this point had gone 3 hours without eating so he was starving for food, and it was already dark by then so we decided to stop. At that point in the night we where all up and awake but Eddie, who kind of came in and out of sleep a lot through the day, and only spoke when he wanted to ask a question. The car or as I now called it the cream car, stopped along some sidewalk up agesnt two trucks also resting for the night. Arthur stepped out of the car first and streacked he's back so thin I swear I heard a crack and a grunt, then he turned over to us all and said in a gruff and blunt voice. “Ok, get out.” Judy glaced at us with a sorry look and gracefully she stepped out of the car genteully. One by one we all got out, Abe let Eddie walk by himself once he gotten awake, through he still didn't look it. Caleb just stayed low next to Abe and Eddie, and Becky got out with a groan while holding my hand, I think she had been needing to go to the bathroom for the past hour or so, so she walked in a odd way, I'm sure me siting on her lap didn't help at all. This Arthur guy put the top of the car back on itself and looked at the watch on he's wrist then pulled off he's sunglaces and tucked into the coller of he's shirt. “It's really late Jude, do you know if apparements make you pay more if there's more people in it?” “I don't think they do.” Judy said. Arthur grumbled something I couldn't understand and we started walking and we made out way into a very yellow apparment building and into a waiting room. I had never been in a apparment building before so it all new too me. Judy told us to sit at the chairs at the front of the waiting room while her and Arthur talked to the woman at the front,  they where a little bet off so Abe felt that it was ok to wisper to the rest of us. “I'm glad their not leaving us outside in the car, I never asked them to take us in but I'm so glad they are.” “Me too.” Becky wispered back. “And Caleb,” Abe looked at him, Caleb turned he's head around quick. “Maybe you should say something, their gonna think your mute and we don't need them getting any more worried then they already are.” Caleb looked annoyed by that and wispered back even more quitely, but with a rude edge in he's voice. “I just don't have anything to say.” Abe rolled he's eyes and signed lightly, but no one commented on that topic further. “Where are they going to drop us off at?” I asked, trying to be quite but knowing how to do so well. “Well I know what town our cousin lives at, it's Mell-Tunnel remember?” I shook my head no but he went on. “Well I asked them to leave us there, and we'd know where to go from there, and we will.” he took a quick look over to he's twin and she nodded, it was then that I really noticed how simaller their faces where, made me wish I had a twin, or at least a sibling that had the same biological parents as me, so we could share more closely the same face hair and skin and they do. Arthur and Judy came back and without talking to us they walked us up some stairs, into a hallway and while Arthur went ahead Judy stopped and looked behind and asked us if any of us needed to us the bathroom. Becky of course said yes, and Abe said he needed to take Eddie to the bathroom to see if he would go, because he hadn't all day. So Judy told Becky Abe and Eddie where the men and woman's bathrooms where and she took Caleb and me along back with her. The room was small and blue, there was a small light near the bedside, and somehow the light coming from the lamp was also blue, so that didn't help. There was only one farely large bed in the room, and before I had to say it Jody saw the look on my face and quickly said. “Oh, sorry you'll have to sleep on the floor. But I'll get you something warm hold on!” She went this way and that looking for anything that could keep 5 children warm overnight, despite the fact that this was indoors and I was already feeling warm, so I at the time didn't really understand why she was acting like a grandmother to us. While she was runing around the man flopped down on the bed and I'm pretty sure he fell asleep right then and there with he's shoes still on. Caleb looked over at me like he did have something he wanted to say, but all I could do was shrug my shoulders. He made a oddly worried face and held my hand carefully in he's. Judy with this and that made a sort of floor bed for us on the ground, really I hate to say it because she seemed so proud of it then, but it really did just look like a big dog bed. But since I hadn't slept in a house in so long to me it looked like a grand queen sized bed, but maybe a bathroom floor would have looked like that to me then anyway. Still I quickly ran over to it with Caleb's hand still in mine, and we laid down and snuggled in him and me together while Judy rambled on more about something in witch I did not understand. “So Debbie.” She started sitting on the bed and resting her small hands on her knees as she looked down at me, I think Caleb was pretending to be asleep. “What do you want to be when you grow up?” The question had me stooped for a second, what a odd question to just go ahead and ask someone, well luckly I did have a awnser then. “A wife.” I said simply. “Oh that's nice. It's a lot more reachable then a princess or whatever girls like now. Do you want to be a mother too?” Well now that was a even weirder question. Of course I would have too be a mother too, I mean wives became moms at some point for some reason. So at that question all I could do was nod. Judy nodded back and signed. “That sound really nice. I hope you can be whatever you want to be when you grow up.” Then she moved up from the bed, patted me on the head and told me it was best if I layed down, then she walked off into a diffrant room into the apprment, and I did what I was told and laid down. Soon after Becky came back yawning, asked if we where supposed to sleep there on the floor, and after I said yes she laid down right to me, and immiditly fell asleep. I could feel Caleb moving in discomfort and a few times elbowing me in the stomace. After a few more minites Abe and Eddie came in, with Abe carrying Eddie because Eddie was fully out. Abe yawned very loudly and laid Eddie down next to himself, and soon he where all lsying down on the ground, and not long after Judy came back into the room with light red pajamas and after taking a quick look at us she went too bed with Arthur, and who Arthur still hadn't taken he's shoes off. I moved away from Caleb's back and Becky's front, and snuggled inbetween the front of Caleb and too Abe's back. It felt safer being near him, and I've learned now that he moves less in he's sleep then all of the others do, exspect for Eddie ever since he's gotten so ill. But tonight he's hole body seemed stiffer. You'd think that wouldn't be the case because he was sleeping indoors, and the night before he was sleeping on a bench! But no, he just didn't feel relaxed then, but he did go to sleep fast which was very good for him, really I think for a good long hour I was the only one awake in that hole room. I spent a lot of time thinking too. I didn't know what state we where in now, but I was starting to wonder if we would be in Texas by the morning, or at least tomarrow by any rate. I was wondering why we even had to walk so much and so long in the first place, why couldn't have Abe sold the clothes somewhere in Pennsylvania, and had payed off someone to drive us all the way down here in the begging? Surely it shouldn't have been that hard to find someone to do it? Or maybe he didn't like taking a risk. I don't know, but the real reason I was bothered by this was Eddie's health. I don't understand why he had gone down so badly, but he had. He didn't act like the bright young gay little boy he was before, not he was just sick, and tired, and disintrested, and I deeply hoped he could push past it once we gotten to Texas, maybe by tommarow if we're lucky. Really my mind had been so set on this little jounery of ours, I had forgotten why we where on it. And it was only really then that this unsaid truth came to my mind, our ante, our ante miss Lois as we called her, the one I was named after who gave me the 'Carry', betrayed us. She was fine with letting what was left of our family to be split apparet. She was fine with letting my strange and creepy biological 'father' take me away, and do God knows what to me. She was fine with letting Eddie barely remember us as we where. And she was fine with never seeing us again. Wasn't losing our parents enough? Why did I have to lose my siblings as well? I had already in the possese of staying together lost my friends, my school, my home, my state, and in Eddie's case some of he's health. And worst throught of all, what if she found out where we where?! What would she do?! Why she'd take us away from each other again! But then again, on second throught, she probably didn't even care that we where gone, no one probably did. I did not go too sleep well that night, again like the last one. Only not scard this time, only sad. I did not cry, in fact I don't remember crying since we left the blue house. But that wasn't a horrible thing so, I guess I should be thank full in a way.

We didn't get there the next morning, apprently Arthur wasn't the best driver in the world, and got a little lost at a point. The day did go well. Judy talked half of the day about of course, random nonsense that I did not understand, but it was intresting to listen to someone who wasn't my siblings again in what seemed a age. All 5 of us had blank faces, and only Abe ever really talked on he's on free will ever, and even then he only did so every now and then. It rained that day, but only for a hour, but still the top of the car was kept on most of the day regardless. Judy said they could sleep in a small appretment one more time before in the morning they would bring us too this Mell-Tunnel town we where apprently going to be living in for the forseeable future. We where luckly in Texas by the end of the night, the appretment was just like the one we where in yesterday, only this one only had 2 rooms and that was a main bedroom and bathroom. But the thing to note about the day was, that after poor Arthur and Judy had had to deal with our smell for almost 2 days now, they decided before we go to see this new town, we all needed to bath a little. Now there was little to be done about the clothes, so right after getting clean we had to get somewhat dirty once again, but still anything was better then nothing. Abe bathed with Eddie, I did with Becky, and Caleb all by himself. After he got done Judy laughed and asked. “Nice to have the tub all for yourself huh?” Caleb looked at her for a second, then nodded and shruged at the same time somehow. After that we slept much better the night before, in fact when I woke up in the morning, both Becky and Eddie where holding me in mine and their sleep. The night and day went by without incedent, and it is what I call, the last day of our long journey across one line of America.

Chapter 7

Once again I was moved off of where I slept before I even woke up. Rudely in a very man like way Abe shook me till I growned and slowly moved my stone like eye lids. “Hey, hey. It's time to get going Deb. Get up” In front of me I saw a supriseingly well cleaned Abe, it even looked like he brushed he's hair which I hadn't seen him do since he went to Church. Around me I could tell the morning sunlight was already coming in the room, no one seemed to be in the room but me and Abe for a second, until I realized Caleb was sitting upright near my feet, he also looked pretty cleaned up, and I think he brushed he's hair too, and that's when I remembered how long we had been out here, because Caleb's hair was getting almost too long, in fact now it was almost hanging, the only good thing about it was that it hid more of the white hairs he had between the bloude ones. I took a look back over to Abe and he seemed to know what I was thinking, and he nodded in some kind of understanding. “We need to get going now Deb, Arthur and Judy are going too take us too Mell-Tunnel. We'll probably be there in a hour or less.” The way he said this got me excited again, it made me smile and nod, and I shook off he's hands on my shoulders and without even a anouther throught I made my own way over to the front door with Abe and Caleb following behind me. “Everyone else is waiting in the car outside.” Abe said, and as we all walked out of the room I looked back at them both. The hallway we where now in was also bright, a brightness I was not acoustomed too as of yet. So much more bright then the dark forests up North in Pennsylvania and West Virginia that we where in before. So for a second I was allowed to get a good look at Abe's and Caleb's faces, and just how diffrant they where form each other. Abe's face was longer and more stronge, he didn't look like a 19^th boy, he seemed to fit more so a portate of a great general in the 17^th century, only he was more so down to earth then that. While Caleb's face was more round, and he had a overall unassuming look to himself, a face a white male child of any century could have. Caleb didn't look like the rest of us, yes it was true that besides Abe and Becky of course, none of us looked like real full blooded siblings, because we weren't. But Caleb was just a diffrant breed. A diffrant kind of person. Not a worse or better person, or a diffrant race or nationality. Just not the same as us. He had no Lois in him I guess. And that made me fear for our overall bond we all had. And there where other things too, between just Abe and Caleb that made them so diffrant too. Abe already looked so much more like a man in the face, while Caleb's was still so young. And Abe had raven black hair and more sqare think eyebrows, and Caleb had thick almost brown eyebrows that where fuzzy almost. And Abe carried himself upright, while Caleb didn't seem to ever even think about that sort of thing. And then there was Caleb's hole look on the family. In all my time knowing him, I don't think he ever looked up to anyone in the family but our father. He liked how brave he was, and how smart and worldly too. It must have been very hard for Caleb, seeing him before he died. But Caleb never talked about it. I think he would have talked about it, or at least brought it up at some point, if it wasn't for us going on this long quest, I don't think being around 4 other people all day long gives you time to think well.  As we walked Caleb glanced at me a few times, never speaking because God forbid if someone heard him speak that he didn't know! But he did have a smile on he's smile whenever out eyes met, one time he even nodded. He's looks made me feel better, and helped me too let go of Abe's hand as we got out of the small apparetment building, when we did a small fatter man at the front of the astablishment yelled us bye saying. “Eh, have a good day! Thank you for stoping by! ¡Vuelve cuando quieras!” I didn't really seemed to hear that last part, but I made a light shy smile back at him when Abe shut the front door behind us. Outside it was even brighter, and even hotter, thank God we didn't have to walk to the town in this weather. In the car everyone was waiting for us. Oddly Arthur wasn't wearing he's sunglaces, and in fact Judy was wearing them for herself. She had her short blounde hair covered up by a thin cloth that flowed around her face. When we got near she glanced at us and gave us a quick smile, but then looked away and oddly enough said nothing. When we all started getting all piled in, Becky turned over to Abe with very tired but happy eyes, like a mother's. “I see Deb is up now.” Abe nodded but said nothing, just yawned. “Good, good...” She glanced at Abe one more time, like she had something she really wanted to say but didn't, then she looked down at the little boy next to her facing the car door. “You ready to go see our new home Eddie?” She asked. Eddie was looking better that morning apparently, enough so that when he swiped he's head up to look away from the road and too her, he's young eyes looked alive once again, and that life had come back into them. “Is there a lot of kids there?” He asked, very excitedly, but he's voice still wasn't quite as high as it used to be, and the darker rings around he's eyes wheren't quite gone. “I... Well I have no idea Eddie, but I think there will be, I hope so anyway for your sake.” And then Becky grabbed at he's cheek like a mother would, and Eddie swipped her hand away, smiled quickly then looked back at the road as he said back after a momment. “I want to see some buffalo when I get there.” “Oh, well I don't think we'll really see any animals in that town to be honest.” Caleb was sitting to the far other side of the car, and I could see he wanted to say something back but could not. “Ok!” Arthur at the front said to everyone. “Next stop at ah...” He looked down at he's wheel for a second. “Mell-Tunnel! Yeah, yeah...” Then with a few complains and ruffs from the car, we where off down the dustly road. 

It seemed like this was the normal way things where, but none of us really talked all that much. Even Judy didn't speak much at all. We got something to eat after leaving the apparentment, we got out of the car this time to eat unlike the other two days, and we took our time with it too. Actually Arthur had some stuff to say when we all sat down. There was a time when he looked Abe straight in the eyes, just like he known him well, and said in a tern voice. “Now, I don't know just who your staying with young man, but you take good care of those two little ones you have with you. Don't think I haven't noticed how sick that littlest one is.” Suddenly Abe's mature sheld fell for a second and he looked like a 13 year old again. All he could say back was in a more steady and well throught out way. “I do the best that I can.” Arthur made a 'mhn.' noise and I think meant yes, and the matter was dropped. After that we where back on the road again. Around 20 minitures in we hadn't seen any human signs of life in a while. The grass we had gotten very short and very yellow, there where patches of sand here and there. But the grass did look alive, maybe not soft but alive none the less, which was good. I was worried where I would be living now would be a deasrt, and that isn't very pretty. That morning the sky was very bright, but the color was almost a greyish blue even with it being so bright. It was hot too, but not muggy. Very now and then you could see a dead tree where maybe a bird would be sitting on it. Then we drove past the first building, a small old wooden cabien that was resting near what looked like a water tower, a green water tower that had a big sign next to it, I would have read it but the text was too small and I couldn't read very well. In the distance we could see a gathering of houses all near by each other of all different shapes and sizes. Then suddenly while my head was misted in thoughts, the car started groaning and complaining, and then we had parked while still on the dirt road. There was a moment of pause before Arthur looked too Judy, nodded then looked back to all of us kids in the back. “Well, I think you can find where your needing too go from here, am I right?” When he said that the light of the sun was behind him, so all of us sqinted and looked away from him, but judging by the tone of he's voice he didn't sound happy, well from the short time I known him he never seemed quite happy, but now he just seemed sad. “Yeah, yeah.” Abe said with a hand over he's eyes. “Your right.” And the first one of us to get out was Eddie, who didn't quite jump out but he did look all around like something speical was in the air, or that he was waiting too see a good friend. Soon all of us slid out of the back of the cream colored car, and to the right side we all backed a little bit aways from the wheels. “It was nice seeing you all!” Judy said, taking off her sunglases too look us in the eyes. “Ha, thank you so much for taking us here. We couldn't thank you enough.” Becky said with a smile in her voice. “Well good luck in Texas! Wish you the best of luck!” “You too! Thank you!” Eddie lifted up he's little hand from mine and waved them bye, but said nothing. Arthur gave one last nod to us all, and even though I think he was a younger man, he looked so old and wise then. And with that, the car turned around, had it's backside to us, then kicked up old dust and dirt as the cream colored car was gone from sight, and we never saw Arthur and Judy ever again. “Well...” Caleb said. “They seemed like real nice people.”

We stood there watching the car for a while, till we where sure it was out of our sights. We stood right inbetween the small cabin next to the water tower, and the town in the distance. Abe shook he's head, and looked right down just at me with a smile on he's face. “Hey, we made it.” I smiled back and nodded, through I couldn't help but notice the rings of darkness under he's eyes. “Let's see if anyone lives in that cabin, he may know where our cousin lives.” Becky said. “Good idea, wish I known he's last name, all I know that he's name is Mathew and that he's in he's 40s, and he lives alone. That's all I know.” Abe signed, but after a moment of thinking he walked us over to the cabin. The cabin was a old dusty thing, a dark grey that 2 decades ago was probably brown. There was 2 steps leading to the front door, and when Abe left us at the bottom and he stood on the top step it made a creaking sound the weight of him. After he knocked on the door about 3 times, we could hear someone groaning and making their way over. Then after a few noises the door was opened and a held sight of a very old man hunched over looking down at us. He had the look of a grandfather, and when he saw that it wasn't just a teenager at he's door, but some little children near by too, he actually smiled for a quick second but then hid it as soon as it came. Weirdest thing about he's looks was he's long white beard, small mustase, and shoulder langth wisky white hair that was thinner then silk. He wore the clothes of a man still in the 18^th century. “What do you want kids?” He asked, in a oddly loud voice. “Hello, sorry to bother you mister, but we where wondering if you know anyone named Mathew that lives over there.” Abe pointed to the town near by. The man nodded. “I do, but I never seen any of you lot before, what do you want from him?” Then the old man looked up at the sky for a second thinking to himself. “Why, that man never talks to anyone, doesn't even get visitors...” “Ah, well we're actually coming to live with him, we're he's cousins.” The old man throwned but nodded again still. “Oh, I didn't know he had family besides he's father. Your all Lois's right?... Yeah that was he's last name I think?” “Yes, yes we are.” “Ah ah, so are ya'll staying here or what?” He laughed. “We're staying-” Before Abe could go on the man laughed even louder, then violently grabbed and shook Abe's hand. “Good for you all! We haven't had anyone new here since!... Mhh, I think since that Edith woman and her daughters came half a decade ago, oh well! Guess I'll be seeing you all around.” And with one last look at Eddie and me, and shut the door right in Abe's face. It took Abe a few seconds of starring blankly at the door before yelling back. “Wait wait! Where does he live!? Which house!?” right after he said that the old man popped he's head out and thought for a moment. “Mhh... Ah! It's the only house that painted a light yellow! Yeah some kid once splashed red paint on he's house, and so he had too... Actually that story is too long, and I'm working on something right now. See ya!” Then the door was shut in Abe's face again, this time so hard it actually hit he's noise hard enough to make him fall back a little and onto the ground. Becky helped him back up as he looked at the cabin annyoed. “Thanks...” Then after getting he's footing, he looked over to us and smiled. “Well, now we know where too go.” Caleb shook he's head but said nothing.

The town overall as we walked through it, seemed small and aged. Like every house and building was from a different decade or made by different people. But it wasn't a place out of time either. I could still signs of modern technology and I could see around about half of the homes I walked past had cars, weather they where new or older well that was random. There where almost more modern building about half way through the towns, places to buy stuff and get chorses done. I saw a small school house (apparently there was actually two in this town, one bigger then the other.) a mail house, a gas stasion and a food store. There only seemed to be one store that sold stuff like clothes and house hold objects. And a few other places too. People seemed to be busy today as well. I would like to note that most of the people I saw where above 30s, but a lot of the time thoses 30 year olds had little kids holding onto their hands as they went by, so life still went on. Most people we went by gave us weird looks, like we where doing something wrong just being there, but that wasn't always the case. 

Then, we found our new home. We where nearly facing it from the other side of the dirt road when we found it. When I eyes fell apon it I held onto Abe's hand harder and pulled Eddie over closer too me. The house wasn't small, but it wasn't big either. From what I could see there was three windows in the hole house, one in the front next to the door. One in the back, and one at the very top of the house, maybe near the attic. There was a dead tree in the yard, but it was small a far away enough to where it wouldn't have fallen on the house, and if it did all it could probably do was break a window at the most. The roof of the house looked old and used, but still strong, like it was well made lively back in it's day. The overall look of the house seemed lived in, but not overrun. Becky looked too her twin and wispered. “What do you think, Abe?” Abe looked back at her, in a way that he's mouth and pintched at one end and he looked at her side ways. “I don't know, nothing I guess.” Becky gave him a worried look and he waved her away like paper. “Let's just jump right in.” And so we did. Finally after our long painful jounrey, we all huddled in close to the door, Abe made sure we where all ready, Becky tried her best too make us all look good. And Abe knocked on the door and we waited. 

Before a man came out, a dog came too the door. We couldn't see the dog, but we could hear the dog barking at us. It sounded big, and the bark only sounded like a warning, not a attack of any kind. Then the door opened and we saw the man and he's dog. The dog was a leonberger, which was a farely big breed. The dog himself was proud looking, but had a kind smart face, it's mussle was a dark dark brown, while most of it's body was a shade darker then choololate. He's tail and legs where more of a cream color, and he's paws where dark. Once he saw us, he just stopped barking right then and there, and just stayed by he's man and watched. The man, who was Mathew, looked to be in he's late 40s, but he's eyes where so sunken in and dark it made him look like he was in he's 70s. He was a little overweight, but only enough to where he had a pot belly. He was oddly well dressed, like quite like he was going out somewhere, but he did have the look of a man that had some money, even if the outside of he's house did look mostly middle class. He had a round face, and big thick eyebrows. He didn't have any hair on he's head. But he's eyebrow hair was a dark shade, but still a hint of brown. That thing about him that I noticed was besides he's thumb, he had no fingers on he's left hand, they looked cut off. He's left hand scard me so much that I hid behind Abe and once again somehow pulled Eddie even closer to me. Mathew looked dumb struck, then shook he's head, then said in a quite voice. “Are... Are you Randy Lois's kids?” He asked. Abe nodded yes. “Oh... I didn't think you would come...” Abe made almost a mean face. “Huh, well we did.” Then he checked himself. “Ah.. You know us right?” When Mathew didn't awnser back and just looked at him dumbly. “Well I'm Abe, I'm 13. Becky is my age. This is Caleb he's 12. And this is Deb and she's 8. And this is Eddie, he's 5.” “Huh, well I'm Mathew, huh just Mathew, nice too meet you.” He shook Abe's hand and they both nodded to each other. Mathew moved back, opened the door wide, and we where let in the house. The big dog, who I later learned was called Gdynia. Later I learned Mathew had a wife, she wasn't in the house then, but to say what she looked like how, she was a short, lightly bigger woman who unlike her husband wore about the same thing everyone around Mull-Tunnel does, exspect for some Sundays and if she's going out anywhere special. The rest of the house had that same air of a good deal of money within a smaller home. But all in all there wasn't anything new or intresting about it. In the house there was a living room, a kicten, a large closet, a basement that was closed off, a bathroom upstairs, a bedroom and a guest bedroom, and a attic. Once we had gotten into the guest bedroom Mathew put he's hands into he's front pockets, and looked around worried like. “I... I suppose you'll have too stay here then, if your all going to stay.” We all walked in, and turned over to look at him waiting. “I just, I just didn't think you would actually come...” Again Abe made a face but kept he's tone in check this time. “You where our last person to turn too, so we had too.” Mathew nodded, then turned he's head thinking maybe. “Huh, well I guess if I can help Randy in any way, even after death I would..” Becky nodded and moved up. “He would have apprated you doing this, I know we do.” “Huh... Well uhh.. ah Becky, you and that one,” he pointed at Abe with he's good hand. “Will have too get jobs, I'm not having any free louders in my house. Maybe that one too.” He glanced at Caleb real quick. “Of course, we want to work.” Becky said quickly, glanceing at Abe who nodded but said nothing. “Good, good. Huh, I'll help you find some just... You 5 stay here, I have to call my wife, she doesn't know you would come. I told her I sent a letter to Randy's children, but now that...” He waved he's hand and grabbed the door nob, before leaving he looked at us and said. “I suppose you'll have too make yourselves at home here.” Then shut the door. When he left he by mistake left the dog, Gdynia in the room with us. The dog sat in the very back of the room, looking at us mostly blank faced, but he did seem to have a eye for Caleb, like he known him. The room only had one bed in it, it was a fare size but we all couldn't sleep on it, not that that seemed to bother us now. While Becky and Abe stood in the back, talking to each other about some important adult bussness I didn't care for, Caleb watched them as he leaned agenst the door, not speaking, and Eddie was bent over holding he's knees, watching the dog. And I sat at the very back of the bed, with my little red knees close to my chest, my ruined dress crumpled around me, and my thin blonde hair close to my neck. I didn't really watch any of them, I just sat and, well I guess I didn't think at all, I didn't really feel like I had anything to think about. What else was there too do? The struggle was over, and our goal was reached. Now it was time to reap our laybore. Eddie seemed to be feeling better, so the worse thing to come out of this was already being fixed, the only thing that seemed odd to me then was our legs, they had gotten oddly thin and red, and lean too. The only one of us that it fited was Abe, Becky's legfs where always thin but the leanness now was a little off putting. I couldn't really see Caleb's legs because he always wore long pants, and didn't ever want too much skin showing, but he probably looked like the rest of us. What I didn't like then, was how numb I felt. Like most bad feelings then, I was sure sleeping was kill off the bad thoughts, so without little effort, I laid face down on the bed, and I fell asleep the rest of the day, and the night, until the morning came. We where home, so it felt safe too rest again, too eat again, and too live again.