"If I (legally) bought the Mona Lisa, would anyone be able to stop me from eating it?"

Muriel!! He's evil, he's sexy, and he fucking knows it. He's a master thief and could get anything he wants. He's so rich that he can buy basically anything his little heart desires, but still just steals any jewelry, decorations or anything of the sort that he'd like to have. Despite being rich, lovable and highly desired by literally ANYONE else, he's absolutely head over heels with if a plastic halloween skeleton was a person. He's married to Malik, whose just as evil but considerably less sexy, and they kiss in front of exploding orphanages or something. Their personalities are VERY contradictory considering Malik has like 2 emotions that are nearly expired and were already 75% off on the market, and Muriel is just a puppy. Literally that is, he's half werewolf! He doesn't shift into a powerful monster at the sight of oh so dramatic moonlight, but is in fact very hairy, clingy and also paws apparently? Not ideal, but Malik seems to think it has a charm to it.

Muriel's very easily excited, loud, and just LOVES wrecking havoc. It's on top on his list of hobbies, right above crocheting. Don't be deceived by how oddly comfortable he is with murder though, he can paint masterfully. He's actually stolen various famous paintings 5 years ago and anyone is yet to notice he replaced them. He can paint uncanny replicas, yet doesn't seem to be able to draw a decent picture without copying a painting stroke by stroke? Either way, he's successful and has a giant tall evil black house plump in the middle of a peaceful happy town. Dark clouds are always gathered at the top of it, very convenient if you're evil and probably want to take over the entire Tri-State area. All staff is paid well though so atleast the evil isn't corporate, which is nice.

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