Alrighty kiddos here's a brief update with Nick first since I assume that's what you all are here for
While I work out changes in his story, his character has been made private. All stories involving Nick are now permanently private.
Nick will no longer have to suffer through sexual assault and slavery, as those two things were really a way to vent my experiences through the character, as my experiences as a young child made me feel as though I was a slave to other's fantasies.
From here on out, I am trying to make him into his own person.
Now for the apology about everything about him.
It is without a doubt fucked up that I vented through him in the manner that I did for the past two years, and yeah, I understandably got alot of shit for it, because the whole story was really horrible in terms of sexual assault and things of the same serious nature.
I do not regret writing it; it helped me cope while I underwent therapy for PTSD. I regret making what I wrote public.
I regret letting anyone other than me read it and basically shoving it into the faces of others solely because I wanted validation.
But also... Fuck some of you guys. Fuck some literal adults who saw my trauma and pain in what I wrote and treated me like shit for it.
It was, without a doubt, really fucked up. But seriously?
Anyways... That's that on that.
i was browsing along toyhouse and saw you comment in a thread and i stumbled upon this bulletin.. i just wanted to let you know that you're not alone. i do the same thing with a few of my characters, as i am a survivor of rape and sexual abuse as well. it is entirely ok for you to cope like this and if you ever need anyone to talk to, you can come to me to vent <3 but i do agree that these sort of things should be given either a warning or made authorized-only or private since others who haven't experienced this won't entirely understand and may get upset by it. ( i do see you have made him private in the end ) but you should never apologize for having a way to deal with your trauma. as long as you obviously aren't romanticizing the situation, which you clearly aren't, i don't see any harm in this method.
tbh people just like to get butthurt over the most trivial of things that don't concern them in the slightest these days
5 years, 3 months ago Edited 8:31 am
oh god thats valid,,, but its ok!! i really appreciate you willing to help me with that stuff ahhh ;w; but yeah im wish ppl would like,, mind their own business when a character is made for venting LOL.... seriously thank you tho it means alot <3
5 years, 3 months ago
I understand the whole part of venting through a character, because I do that. Shade and Aris are there for my angsty bullshit. But I have no idea what happened with the oc and I'm sorry that you were venting in a healthy way and people got offended by it
5 years, 3 months ago
No no it is ok!! I feel as though even though the character helped my venting, it was a harmful representation of those topics on my end, leading to people to be upset at me for it. But venting through your characters is totally valid!! It’s just not for me anymore aha
5 years, 3 months ago
Ok
5 years, 3 months ago
5 years, 3 months ago
Oh no none of that seems rude!! These are all valid points, suggestions, and questions and I'll try to answer them the best I can LOL..
I am not legally an adult yet, and the few people I had issues with were all in their twenties kghdshd, so I meant that as in I feel as though adults really! Shouldn't be attacking any child over the internet if that makes sense? I'm still learning basic decency even now at 17 years old because yeah some of us kids are just dumb and need the time to grow up!!
With Nick's profile, i did not change the triggering content due to backlash; I changed it mostly because there was no need for it to be the way that it was anymore, if that makes sense? I had no need to vent through him anymore due to me getting aloooot of therapy over the past two years, and finally feeling comfortable to let those aspects of him go! But he will still get a warning as a character due to other issues I have planned for him (mostly drug mentions)
And your view of things is definitely valid!! Unfortunately when I did need to write said things I didn't realize the appropriate manner to share them would be to keep them mainly to myself and maybe to my close friends, instead of putting it out publicly and encouraging others to read it, as the content was problematic mainly due to my mental state when I wrote it.
And thank u!! My mental health is better, but until I learn to handle said subjects better, I probably shouldn't write them, if that makes sense? ;0; It just isn't as healthy for me if I do write them at this time!!
(also ahh shit,, welp, i hope someone else can fill their claim then, as I cant see it ;w;)
5 years, 3 months ago