Fighting Love

Antonio’s home always had an inviting aura to it- maybe it was the fact there was a handmade jungle gym in the backyard, or maybe it was the fact you could hear the waves crash against the beach from the living room when it was quiet, but I was usually able to relax when I was here.  Pulling into the driveway now just made my shoulders shake more.

“Alright, kids, c’mon!”  Antonio reached over to take the pizzas from my lap.  His smile was sweet as he leaned over to grab the boxes, but I wasn’t prepared for the kiss on my cheek.

At some point, Antonio left the car with his kids.  At some point, he was climbing up the stairs to his house with them.  It must have happened.  My skin prickled where Antonio had pressed his lips.  I wanted it to sting, but it didn’t.

On the ground were the paintings Santiago and Maria gave me, and I bent down to pick them up.  Up close, the dog and the cat weren’t as nearly as ugly as I remembered them being earlier.  They were perfect.  Every little imperfection came together to create two beautiful paintings.  I loved them.  I loved them so much.  I barely noticed my tears making the paint run as they fell onto the paper.

“Mary?!”  The cool of the night rushed into the car as Antonio opened the door.  “Sweetheart, oh my god!  Why are you crying?”  A laugh danced in his voice, but I knew him.  It was disbelief.

“No, Antonio,” I fought against my tears, almost forcing them to stop on command.  Girls like me don’t cry, especially in front of people like Antonio.  “I’m f-fine.”  My voice wavered, and I hated it for that.  “I’m fine.”

Antonio clearly didn’t believe me.  “Marilyn, did I say somethin’?”  Antonio’s expression was heartbreaking.  The girl he was staring at wasn’t me.  She wasn’t a fighter.

“N-No...” I managed.  “It’s not you.  It’s never you.  I-”  I couldn’t think fast enough.  I stumbled for something, “I h-hurt myself earlier and it’s been really killing me all day.  It just got really bad now, b-but.  I’m fine.”

“Oh?  Why didn’t you tell me when I picked you up?”  I knew why, but Antonio laughed.  “I woulda picked something up.  Aw, sweetheart.”  A hand came and wiped my tear away with his thumb.  “Where’s it hurt?  I won’t touch there.”

“I-It’s just my chest.”  It was always hard to lie, but this one came out without a problem.

“Alright, well, I won’t touch ya there!  And I’ll make sure the kids don’t either!”  His laugh was the same as it has always been.  “The kids picked out a movie.  It’s animated, I hope you don’t mind.”

“That’s fine.”  I paused, wiping my tears.  “They’ve been excited all day.”

“Well, yeah!”  Another laugh from Antonio.  “They were talkin’ about seeing you all morning!  Santiago was talkin’ about how the couch is just the right size for you to sit in the middle of them.  Guess that means I got the floor.”

I sputtered out a laugh.  “H-Ha, no, I’m sure there’s room for you.  The tears stopped burning.  They stopped running down my cheeks completely as I lifted my head and tried to smile at Antonio.  It was better than nothing.

“I’ll make room if I gotta.  Can’t miss out on sittin’ next to my best friend.”  His voice was soft, like nothing I’d heard before.  “C’mon.  You want mozzarella sticks, right?  There’s too many.”  He laughed.  “Those kids want you right in the middle of them while they watch that movie.”

I made sure I grabbed those paintings before I slid out of the car, following Antonio into the house.  It was much warmer inside than it was outside. 

“Miss Mary, c’mon, let’s watch TV now!”  Santiago bounced from the couch to the chair, Maria attempting to copy him.  My tears made my hand wet as I wiped them from my eyes.

“Alright, give me a sec, Santi.”  I made a pitstop to the kitchen and took two magnets from the fridge, pinning the kids’ masterpieces to the fridge.  Suddenly, Santiago was standing behind me.

“C’mon, c’mon!”  Santiago’s excitement was welcoming.  I smiled softly and went to follow him into the living room.  He took my hand.  It prickled, and stung a little bit, but I let him hold my hand with his warm one as we walked into the living room.