♟Yevgeni♟'s Links
My Godfather, yes. He was a man who taught me well on the behalf of many pointless things such as religion. Does he really take me for a fool to believe in such things? Even as a young child of 13, when he took custody of me, I still did not take the words of his teachings into account. The knowledge did not leave me though, that's simply just not how I work. He did, however, pursue me into a career of bloodlust; a hitman. He taught me how to hold a gun, how to hide bodies, and how to stay anonymous along with the many complex tools of being a hitman. The man raised me as an adolescent and took better care of me, more than what my father and mother combined had ever done for me. It feels, peculiar to say such negative things regarding my father when I've done nothing but practically worship the man in vain. But, I suppose there is no use lying to myself. Yevgeni was, no, is a hypocritical man. How can one preach about the glory of God and then slaughter the families of the very innocent? As far as I'm aware, the man no longer works as a hitman but as a loyal messenger. Still, hypocrisy runs fluid in his blood. Which I'm well aware had rubbed off of him and onto me. We still keep in touch as much as my job allows it. Lately I've been far too busy to return his calls or invitations.
He has my utmost regard. A rather righteous man, if I do say so myself. He is the only person to whom I dare expose my vulnerability. The reverence I have for Yevgeni exceeds that of even Father himself. If only Yevgeni could hear my thoughts right now he'd be greatly disappointed in me for comparing him to the most high. But something within me blushes at the thought of being scolded by him.
uh- eh... fuck. Where do I even begin with this? You see, It's not that I hate Yevgeni or anything. It's just... he's been kind to me ever since I was a young kid. I'm not used to older men sharing that sort of care without underlying motives. Sometimes I feel I'm not deserving of that fatherly love, even with everything that's happened to me in my life. I ignore him, treat him as if he's not there, yet he still takes time out of his day to check up on me and to see if I'm okay. It makes me feel uncomfortable. I don't know what to do?