A Big Brother's Apology

1012 words (excluding headlines)

Only mama's gift can warm this night

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"Dear Elana,

Within my reach I want you to be, I desperately need to be where you are. It was only supposed to be a few weeks I would be away to look for someone you and I know need to come back home, but things haven't been going well. Nothing is right about this. I'm doing so much wrong towards you by not being there, what sort of big brother am I?"

Extensive claws dug into the table followed by a whinging coming from a clinched mouth. Outside the busted window a storm of snow brought more cold to the writer's heart. The only thing keeping this vespire slightly warm was a hot stream of tears pouring from his face. That night, Denali felt so alone and frozen in the abandoned cabin. Before he had entered it, it would've provided a nice shelter and just needed the fireplace lit up to keep anyone cozy. However after Denali dragged himself inside, the some of the walls stood no more, and the window could not hold glass as it was busted through.

On the floor Denali laid, missing all his people so much while they were probably enjoying this special day without him. Holding onto a warm scarf his mama gave him, the aching vespire bundled up in the only comfort at the moment he didn't destroy. Everything hurt, but for a little while Denali found a way to ignore it. He had to save up his energy to continue writing to someone he felt would be greatly disappointed if he didn't at least try to write to.

I was hunted

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"I was out in the woods when everything rushed by so fast. All the sudden people who didn't know me were trying to keep me from being able to return home. These people with their stuffy feathers didn't want me to get back to my family that needs me. They--"

A shaky hand dropped the pen it was holding, then wiped the tears threatening to ruin the very letter it wrote. After calming down his trembling, Denali picked that pen back up.

"They forced me to be in an appearance I don't want you to see. You shouldn't have to know what I look like and never ever should you know what these people look like. Please Elana. Stay safe in that home of ours so I don't have to take on a burden of endless pain should these same people ever hurt you."

Denali didn't know how his sister would react to all of this, in fact he was thinking of starting all over with the letter. Did she really need to be aware what some pouflons decided to put her big brother through? With how long it was taking for him to write in the first place, Denali stared up at the damaged ceiling lamp knowing he had to tell his sister some of the truth.

Just yesterday it seemed Denali entered into a room full of fresh baked candy gem cookies.

"You cookie monster!" Elana squealed at her big brother. "Those were meant for me you silly geode!"

"In what way am I some baby to you? I'm three times your height," Denali scoffed and wolfed down more cookies without a single shame.

A pounce and a shake down from a playful yet angry sister sent gingerbread cookies from Denali's own person flying all over the house. Denali was surrounded by gingerbread, candy gem, and a new batch of crystal cake cookies his sister decided to throw at him as well. He didn't care at all though, more food for him.

Denali needed all that sweetness thrown at him so much right now.

I'll be home this night

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"It's people like these that make me have to show a side of myself that doesn't need to be shown. All I want is for you to know I'm okay, but out here I can't do that. I have to find some poor excuse of a shelter to just feel secure enough to write this letter. Then I have to brave cold and ambush alike just to get to someone who can send you this letter.

As your big brother, I'm willing though. I hope you understand how much I love you, how much I want to do right by you, how much I want my love to be close to what mama's love is like. Of course I'd never get to her level as she went through a lot more just to have the both of us here.

Let me try to get as close as I possibly can though. Then you'll understand, and when this world turns right, you can go outside fearlessly to wherever you wish Elana. You can walk freely and feel even more elevated from knowing family like your big brother are never against you, only for you.

- I love you so much, your brother Denali."

Three nights it took. Three nights to write that letter, and it was another three for Denali to find a messenger. What was done was done. When his sister would get that letter, Denali didn't know, but what he did know was that he'd better find some way to deliver himself home.

This task was daunting, not because of scars afflicted on him by hateful pouflons as he had none of those now. It was daunting due to his own inability to let go of what he felt he did wrong. Like a block of ice he was turned into by thinking about his family greeting him with disapproval. Denali had to reach back, real far back, all the way back into his woolly coat to pull a comforting piece of the past out. Holding on to the plushie white loupine his sister kept as a geode, Denali knew he'd get home by nightfall if he would just push pass his inner pains. All this time he kept Warrior nice and snuggled in his wool, and boy was he glad those pouflons didn't hurt Warrior.

That night Warrior and Denali might find much victory on the road to home.