Bismarck's (attempts at) Dailies

It was pouring rain in the Royal City and had been doing so for several days now. Low thunder rumbled across the sky, making the now cold tea in Genevieve's cup ripple as she sat in the windowsill watching the rain. The past few weeks had been frightfully busy with wedding preparations in full swing. Lord Alois was handling most of the planning, but Genevieve certainly wasn't free from her duties. Many of the guests were diplomats and meeting with them for appointments combined with her usual queenly duties, fittings for her dress, and Lord Alois knocking on her door every so often to iron out some new small detail was taxing. The wedding was in a week now, and though she knew she should feel practically giddy, a strange sense of melancholy had settled over her heart and she'd spent much of the day sequestered in her room alone.

In truth these past few weeks hadn't even been that much more busy than the year that preceeded them; rebuilding the queendom had been arduous work. They were only having the wedding now because Genevieve had insisted she wouldn't have an extravagant ceremony when the Royal City was still in shambles from the convergence of Echidna's horde and the Imperial invasion force, and Serena had agreed. Genevieve wondered how Serena was faring; despite the fact they shared a bed together, she had barely spoken more than a few words to her wife-to-be in the past few days. All of Genevieve's family, small as it was, would be attending the wedding - Serena had no family here. There had been peculiar incidents over the past year and a handful of umbra were now residents, but none related to Serena, and they were so preoccupied with other issues that looking to get to the bottom of the strange portals had been unsuccessful. She ought to go speak to her.

Genevieve was saved the trouble when there was a knock at the door. "Come in." she called, and Serena entered.
"Hey." the bronze-skinned umbra woman smiled at Genevieve, and the cold feeling in her heart softened slightly. "I haven't seen you all day."
"I've barely seen you at all this week." said Genevieve.
"Her Majesty, sitting in the windowsill watching the rain." Serena approached and Genevieve reached and joined hands with her. "How are you doing? You left more than half a cup of tea on the table."
"I've been alright."
"Are you sure?" Serena gave her a look. Genevieve sighed.
"I don't know how to explain it. I've just been feeling..."
"Unhappy?"
"I suppose so." said Genevieve with a sigh. Serena tugged on her hand and inclined her head to the large armchair before the fireplace. Genevieve allowed her to be gently led there and they sat together, Serena flicking a violet spark into the fireplace and starting a fire.
"The weather certainly doesn't help, does it?" said Serena, brushing a stray lock of hair from Genevieve's face.
"No, it certainly doesn't." said Genevieve. "I just... it's hard to explain."
"We've both been so busy. In one week we'll be married, and then we don't have to worry about that at least." Serena rested her head on Genevieve's shoulder. "What's on your mind?" Genevieve hesitated.
"I should be happy, I know. I love you, Serena, and I'm the happiest woman in Faeros to be marrying you, but..." Her face darkened.
"It's Delilah, isn't it?" said Serena. Genevieve nodded.
"A year and a half isn't long enough. I shouldn't... I shouldn't be queen. I should never have been queen. I should never..." Her gaze met Serena's for a moment and she broke away a moment after. "Maybe Ravana was right all along. Maybe I am just selfish... wicked..."
"Don't say that." Serena said softly, gently kissing Genevieve's cheek. "You're a good queen."
"Delilah should have been queen."
"She should have. But that was another time. You did this to honour her memory. The charity you made for her has done so much to help the Royal City, the queendom even."
"But how could I say I ever truly loved her if... a year and a half after her death, I'm marrying you?" said Genevieve. "It's... I hate the thought, but it's been gnawing at me ever since. I love you Serena, I can't say it enough, I can't express how much I do, but..." She trailed off, the violet in her eyes becoming so dark it was almost black.
"In my homeland, we don't have anything like your marriages. If two people want to be together, they simply are. If more than two people want to be together, they simply... are." said Serena. "Love is never something you have to give wholly to one person and to no one else. You love Seph and Renée, don't you?"
"I do, but..."
"You love John and Diedra and Alaric and Maja, don't you?" said Serena. "Maybe it's not the same, but you do love them. You love Delilah. You love me. Delilah is gone, but you still love her. That doesn't mean you love her less by loving someone else." Genevieve was silent for a moment, the violet in her eyes roiling. "She would want you to be happy. She knows you still love her, and she still loves you too. And she would want you to be happy." Serena kissed Genevieve. "Try to be happy for her. Ravana won the battle but he lost the war. His master lost the war. The Dragon was wrong, Genevieve."
"The Dragon was wrong." The light returned to Genevieve's eyes. "You're right. Of course you're right. I'm sorry I doubted myself." She embraced Serena.