Sugar and Spice

Alexis leaned against her headboard, letting out a groan. She wrapped her tail around her legs and hugged her knees, lamenting her predicament for the hundredth time that day, and it wasn't even afternoon yet.

Why was this so hard? The tough part was supposed to be over. That’s what she’d always read in the books.

Yet her thumb kept hovering over Mitty’s number, never pushing it.

A week and a half had passed since their confession, and in that time Alexis had turned in all her coursework for the semester, submitted a short article for the newspaper club, and levelled up her character several times on Legends Online; in short, everything she was supposed to do to bring in the new year, except one tiny little thing.

She had yet to ask Mitty out.

It wasn’t like they weren’t talking. They still played LO together as usual, but neither of them tried to set anything up. The new year was upon them, and when this week finished, they would be back at uni for their second semester. This was the perfect time to spend a day with Mitty, which was why it wasn’t perfect at all. Alexis had no creative writing assignment to hide behind; anything they did would just be them enjoying each other’s company. That was too much pressure for her.

Nevertheless, she said she’d do it, and she had to eventually. It wasn’t like she didn’t want to; on the contrary, her finger was drawn to Mitty’s number on her phone like a magnet, but something stopped her from pushing down.

“Lexi, you’re such a chicken,” she moaned, burying her face in her knees. She heaved a deep sigh as if to expel her misgivings and lifted her head back up, her pink glasses askew and her blue hair a mess. She inhaled sharply, bit her lip, steeled herself, and…

Pressed the number below Mitty’s.

“Hello?” Kyra answered promptly.

“Hi, Kyra. Are you busy?”

“You’re lucky. I just finished grocery shopping with my sister. How can I help you?”

Alexis stood up and looked out her window. The sky was bright and sunny, and the snow was starting to melt under the rays. Green grass poked out from the white snow in the field, which was now mostly slushy footprints.

“Um,” she began, twirling a lock of her hair. “Promise you won’t laugh?”

“Alexis, I would never laugh at you.”

Alexis frowned. “You sure did when I slipped on ice the other day.”

“I apologised and helped you back up!”

Alexis chuckled. “I did find it kind of funny afterwards. You know, when my bum stopped hurting.”

Kyra snickered on the other end. “So, what’s up? I promise I won’t laugh. Journalist’s honour.”

Alexis wondered how trustworthy that was, but didn’t comment on it. “So, um, Mitty and I kind of… that is, we…” Was it always going to be this hard? “After the party last week, we, well, we c-confessed.” She ducked her head.

“‘We’? So it was mutual? Congratulations!”

Alexis furrowed her brow slightly as she remembered Kyra’s actions during the party. “Did you know?"

“I had a hunch. I could tell Mitty had feelings for you, but you were trickier to figure out.”

Alexis mentally slapped herself over how blind and dumb she’d been. She couldn’t believe she thought Kyra had been the object of Mitty’s affections. Or… I guess I just couldn’t believe it might be me, she thought. “Well, hum, good detective skills there,” she said. “Anyway, I want to ask Mitty out, but I, um, I can’t.”

“Why not?”

Alexis winced, leaning against the wall. “It’s too scary!”

She thought she heard a faint snicker before Kyra abruptly stopped it. “I see. Well, you know better than anyone that Mitty isn't as scary as she looks."

"It's not that." Alexis fiddled with her hair. "I don't think I'd be very good on a date. I don't want to disappoint her."

"I don't think you can." Kyra's voice grew quiet for a moment before continuing as normal. "Trust me, you'll be fine."

Alexis hummed uneasily, unsure how to reply.

"Have you been on a date before?"

Alexis dipped her head and hid behind her hair despite no one being there to see her. "No."

"Okay. Do you have anything in mind?"

"I want it to be, like, a proper date. With flowers and restaurants and stuff." Alexis smiled goofily as she imagined Mitty in a pretty red dress before remembering she probably wouldn't be caught dead in one, not even for a date. "If Mitty's okay with it."

"Are you sure you want that to be your first date? It can be quite daunting, especially for… new couples."

Alexis heard the unspoken implication. Daunting for people like us. She knew that going in, which was exactly why she wanted to do this. "Yes," she replied. "I've always wanted to do all that traditional date stuff."

"I understand, but you don't have to go right into that," Kyra replied. "You can start small, like a coffee date, or something."

"I think we're a little bit past that." Alexis sat back on her bed with a huff. "I just, I really want to do the proper date stuff with Mitty. I'm just worried I might not be good at it."

She knew how she sounded. It would indeed be easier if they did something simple, but they had been doing that for months! They spent a lot of time together, and now it was time to take the next step, even if it felt more like a plunge.

"If you're set on this, fine," said Kyra. "I don't have much advice, except for being yourself. Mitty knows you, and it won't be fun for either of you if you pretend to be something you're not."

Alexis thought that was a given. Nevertheless, she'd be rude to dismiss it. "Thanks," she replied, "I'll keep that in mind."

"What I mean is," Kyra sighed, "even if you feel pressured to, don't push it. Nothing is more awkward than a forced date."

"But pushing it is all I do, that's the thing!" Alexis winced. "Like, I can't talk to people normally, I have to really try, and…"

"Has that ever been a problem with Mitty?"

Alexis thought back to their first ever writing class. How she'd constantly shrunk under Mitty's gaze, watching for the girl's sharp tongue.

"That's hilarious. You forgot my name."

She remembered their first phone conversation. The Firestar Viewing. All the times they played LO together. Their little detours from their assignments.

“It used to be,” she admitted, “but not anymore.”

“Then I don’t think you have much to worry about,” Kyra replied. “And if it does get awkward, don’t worry, that’s normal. I’m not going to patronise you by saying it’ll be smooth sailing, but I know you two like each other. You’ll work it out somehow.”

“Thanks.” Alexis felt the warmth of sunlight on her black tights and crossed her legs, rocking slightly on the bed. “You seem to know a lot about this stuff. Have you been on dates before?”

“Yeah, now and then.”

“Ooh.” Alexis’ eyes widened in wonderment. So not only was Kyra an accomplished student and president of the newspaper club, but she had partners too! She was so worldly. “Anyone right now?”

“Nah.” Kyra chuckled. “Way too busy for that. Work comes first.”

Alexis narrowed her eyes. Be careful, Kyra. She wasn’t about to put a damper on the conversation with her misgivings, though. “Yeah, I imagine you’ve got a lot on your plate.”

A text message notification popped up.

Dad: Alexis, I am waiting to hear from you. I need your answer as soon as possible.

Alexis swiped it away.

“Not much more than you though, right?” Kyra said. “I mean, we’re all in this together now. Final stretch.”

“Yeah.” Alexis bit her lip, her tail lowering to the floor. “Guess we’re all pretty busy.”

The light streaming from the window hit her desk, and she flinched back from the brightness bouncing off her closed laptop. Scattered papers littered the surface, all of them rejects and half-baked ideas. She smelled the chocolatey remnants of her breakfast and knew she should open the window.

She didn’t want the conversation to continue down this path, and she suddenly didn’t feel much like talking anymore, anyway. “I should get going, I have, um, something to do,” she said, trying to inject cheer in her voice. “Thanks for your help!”

“No problem. Let me know how it goes, yeah? Mitty certainly won’t.”

Alexis snickered at that. “Will do. Talk to you later.”

“See you. Bye!”

They hung up, leaving Alexis alone with her phone. She sighed and stood up, stretching like a cat in the sun. There was no need to feel down, after all. She had a date to look forward to! Once she managed to pluck up the nerve to schedule it, of course.

She opened her window and inhaled the sharp, fresh scent of winter air.

***

It was quiet. Too quiet. It wasn't supposed to be this quiet, surely? There were other people here. Plenty of people. Maybe even too many.

Alexis sat at a small circular table at a restaurant that smelled of garlic and wine. The walls were a deep red and the spaces were cosy, with either leather booths or two-person tables of brown lacquered wood taking up most of the room. Small candles lit up the tables, the only sources of light save for the smattering of red lamps hanging from the ceiling. Smooth jazz played quietly from the speakers, just loud enough to be noticeable while blending in with the atmosphere. Vistians sat all around Alexis, keeping her trapped at her little table all alone.

She tried to crease the corners of her menu before remembering it was bound in a fine leather, so she put it down with a huff. She needed to do something to occupy her time before Mitty arrived. She fiddled with the ends of her yellow tunic, the most remotely date-ready item in her wardrobe. She heard a couple laughing next to her, and shrunk in her chair.

Was this really a good idea?

Alexis frowned at herself and straightened her back. Of course it was a good idea. She wanted to do this; she knew she could do this. Who couldn’t even go on something as simple as a date?

“There you are.”

Alexis’ ears perked up at the familiar low voice. She looked up to see Mitty taking a seat opposite her on their small table, and her eyes almost popped out of her head.

Mitty’s usual black attire was almost completely gone; only her leather jacket was draped on the back of her chair. She wore a frilly pastel pink top and light blue skinny jeans that did nothing to hide her generous thighs, but that wasn’t what Alexis was gaping at. No, that honour fell to Mitty’s beautiful pink and blonde hair; it was done up in two long, flowing twintails that waved hypnotically behind her.

Alexis tried to speak, but her breath was stuck fast. Only when Mitty picked up her own menu did she finally find her voice. “H-hi,” she croaked.

Mitty looked up at her with those mesmerising teal eyes. “Hey,” she replied. “Hope you weren’t waiting long.”

“Not at all!” Alexis shook her head vigorously, her meticulously-brushed hair already flying everywhere. “Only a few minutes.”

“Good.” Mitty looked down at her menu, her ears flicking like a cat’s. Alexis couldn’t help noticing how the candle’s light flickered playfully on Mitty’s white cheeks. Were they as soft as they looked? Alexis was close enough that if she wanted to, she could reach out and cup them--

No no no I don’t wanna do that, she mentally chastised herself. I mean I do I think but now’s not the time and Mitty would probably be freaked out and I mean even I’m a little concerned to be honest and--

Mitty’s ears flicked again and she frowned up at Alexis. “What?”

“N-nothing!” Alexis whipped up her menu so fast she slapped it against her face. "Ow."

Mitty snorted, but didn't say anything.

In fact, no one said anything. Minutes passed in silence as they perused the menu, Alexis sneaking glances at Mitty any time the girl wasn't looking. She wanted to talk, to compliment Mitty, to do something other than read the same incomprehensible names on the menu over and over, but all she could do was bite her lip and swallow her words.

This shouldn’t be any different from normal. Come on, Lexi.

"So what are you having?" Mitty asked eventually.

Alexis leapt at the conversation like a famished hunter. "Spaghetti!" She winced as her loud volume attracted attention, but as always Mitty's glares swiftly diverted any onlookers. "Um, the spaghetti," she repeated in a more reasonable tone. "The one with garlic."

Mitty raised an eyebrow. "Alexis, they all have garlic."

"Oh, right." Alexis didn't want to look stupid by mispronouncing the name, so she pointed to it on Mitty's menu. "This one."

"Oh, I see." Mitty nodded. "I'm still deciding."

Alexis wanted to help out, but she knew very little about what most of this food even was, so she kept quiet.

Once their food was ordered (which Mitty somehow managed to pronounce perfectly), they sat in silence again. There were attempts at conversation, like how their journeys were, how nice the weather was (it wasn't, Alexis actually stepped in slushy mud on her way over), and other meaningless meanderings that ended up nowhere. For the most part, Alexis spent the time mustering the courage to say something. She was keenly aware of their awkward silence, and that they were sitting in a busy restaurant that smelled of wine and opulence.

What was she supposed to say? She knew what she wanted to say, but her gut told her it was a bad idea. She couldn't stop staring at Mitty's frilly top and her elegant twintails. If she was honest and called Mitty cute, she'd get glared at, yet saying nothing at all clearly hadn't helped. But every time she opened her mouth, pressure kept her tongue pinned. Mitty's distinctly not-black attire and her own formal tunic were a casual reminder that this wasn't your average meeting, not to mention their circular table was tiny enough that if they stretched even a little, their legs would touch.

Alexis had no way of ignoring the fact that she was on a date. With Mitty.

By the time their food arrived, they’d still barely spoken.

"This is stupid," Mitty muttered over her pasta.

Alexis' ears flattened against her head. "Sorry."

Mitty’s eye twitched. "Why are you sorry?"

Alexis swallowed, knowing she'd annoyed her. Flashbacks to their first writing class bombarded her mind, causing her to clench her fists against the cotton of her tunic. "For not being a good date."

Mitty sighed, prodding her pasta with a fork. "Can't say I'm doing a better job."

"But you are!" Alexis protested. "You really dressed up."

Mitty blushed and frowned at the table. "Wish I hadn't."

Alexis winced. "But you look really nice!"

"I look stupid."

"No, you don't!" Alexis wasn’t sure this was smart, but she went for it anyway. "You look adorable."

Mitty snarled at her pasta and clawed at her hair. "Fuck this." She undid one twintail, her hair falling to her back once more.

"Wait!" Alexis cursed herself for guessing right. "What are you doing?"

"What does it look like?" Mitty hissed, yet she stopped at her other twintail, her hands hovering over her hair.

Alexis lowered her head. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to upset you."

Mitty paused, then let out a large sigh, the steam from her pasta billowing to the side. "It's not you," she grumbled. "I just… I thought I could do this, but…"

Alexis couldn't let the mood sour any further. "I'm sorry, I put too much pressure on you."

"You didn't tell me to do this."

Alexis twirled her spaghetti with a fork, but couldn't bring herself to eat it. "I did organise it. I just wanted to try going on a real date."

Mitty tugged the end of her hair. "I don't think I can do real dates."

Alexis tried not to remember her phone conversation with Kyra, but it was impossible to ignore it. Suddenly her spaghetti smelled too strong, and she felt like gagging. “Oh,” she said. “It’s okay. I’m sure with time it’ll get easier.”

Mitty looked up at her with flattened ears and hunched shoulders, but the anger was gone from her face. She said nothing and was quick to turn her attention back to her food.

Alexis tried to comfort her, but her tongue still refused to cooperate. She toyed with her spaghetti, curling her tail over her legs.

The rest of their date passed in the same fashion, and by the time they left the restaurant, they’d given up on conversation altogether. Alexis had never been more relieved to leave the smell of garlic behind. The fresh breeze of the night air cooled her sweating body as they stepped onto the streets of Haldwell’s busy city. Restaurants were lit up and filled with Vistians enjoying a night out, but Alexis barely paid any attention to them. She was already following Mitty back to the bus stop.

Mitty still had one twintail done up, but by the time they reached the stop she undid that too, letting her hair flow down her back again. She wore her leather jacket, covering her pink top, and had a coat on for good measure so only her tight jeans and long boots were visible. She folded her arms as she leaned against the bus shelter, her bundled figure illuminated by passing vehicles.

Alexis stood awkwardly beside her. “Um,” she said, the first thing to come out of her mouth since dessert.

Mitty glanced at her before looking back at the road. “Yeah?”

Alexis didn’t know what to say, so she said the only thing she could think of. “I’m sorry.”

“For what now?” Mitty exhaled sharply. “Stop that, already. It’s not the magical cure you think it is.”

Alexis flinched like she’d been struck. And yet again, she wanted to apologise. “I know,” she muttered.

Mitty said nothing.

Alexis knew she shouldn’t take it personally. If Mitty was feeling even half as disappointed as she was, her behaviour was understandable. But Alexis had never been very good at not taking bad moods personally. She bowed her head and wrapped her arms over herself, no longer in the mood to even try talking.

The ride back was even less exciting. They sat together, both of them huddled on the edges of their seats. Alexis at least had the window, so she watched the scenery pass by with vague interest. Any time their tails accidentally touched, they jolted them back against their legs.

Was this how it was going to be? Did one error in judgement really reset their relationship back to the beginning of the first semester? Alexis refused to believe it, but Mitty’s distance was undeniable. And all she wanted to do was go on a real date with the girl she liked…

They got off at the stop outside campus. Lampposts lit up an empty street of ice and slush. They set off, but before they got very far a small cat-pet crossed their path. It watched them with cautious eyes, its tail slowly waving.

“Oh, hello,” said Mitty, and Alexis’ eyes bugged out. Mitty’s voice… it was high-pitched. High-pitched and soft.

The cat meowed up at her.

“Meow to you too,” Mitty replied. “Nice to meet you.”

“Meow,” said the cat.

Mitty smiled. “Go on, then. Don’t you have someplace to be?”

The cat-pet stared up at her.

Alexis could hardly believe what she was seeing, but she knew better than to point anything out twice in one night. She looked at Mitty’s smiling face, and just like that, her heart fluttered again. She turned to the cat. “Go on,” she said to it, waving gently. “You can go first.”

The cat-pet mewed again and took a step forward.

“That’s it,” said Mitty, “come on, you’re free to go.”

The cat-pet gave them one last look before it darted past them, disappearing into the night.

Alexis and Mitty glanced at each other, and Alexis couldn’t help giggling. Mitty rolled her eyes, but her smile didn’t waver.

“Where do you think he was going?” Alexis asked.

“Home, I hope.”

“Mm.” Alexis looked out into the night before turning back to Mitty. “Uh, I’m not going to apologise for the date again, but I, well…”

“I know.” Mitty sighed. “I’m sorry for lashing out earlier. I just…”

“I know.”

They blinked at each other before snickering quietly.

“Why are we like this?” Mitty asked.

“I don’t know.” Alexis grinned as Mitty nudged her, but it was quick to fall as she remembered her conversation with Kyra again. “Do you think we just aren’t cut out for this?”

Mitty’s eyes widened. “Alexis, it was one date.”

“Yeah, but, um, neither of us was having any fun.”

“That doesn’t mean I don’t want to…” Mitty cleared her throat, looking away. “To date you.”

Alexis’ heart leapt. “I don’t want to not date you either.”

Mitty paused. “What?”

“You know what I mean.”

“Some creative writing major you are.”

“Hey!” Alexis nudged Mitty this time, who laughed. “Yeah, I could’ve phrased it better, but you got it anyway!”

“I know, I'm just messing with you.”

Alexis sighed. “Why couldn’t we be like this during the actual date?”

Mitty froze, and the jovial mood dropped. Her shoulders sagged. “Because I'm not normal," she mumbled, kicking the slush with the toe of her boot.

"No, Mitty, don't say that!"

"Why lie?" Mitty craned her neck to face the night sky dead-on. "I know I'm difficult. Contradictory." She glanced at Alexis, her muzzle still angled upwards. "I can't be normal."

Alexis didn't want to patronise Mitty by disagreeing, and that left a foul taste in her mouth. But there was more to Mitty than her harshness, and Alexis had to make her see that. "That doesn't matter," she said. "You tried. You tried for me." She put a hand on Mitty's arm. "I know how kind you really are. I'm sorry I put you through that."

Mitty fidgeted in place. "But I should be able to go on a stupid date, at the very least."

"Hey, I had trouble too! So much trouble!" Alexis winced. "Any time I wanted to say something, all I could think about was that we were on a date." She spread her arms out. "It was so much pressure!"

"Yeah, it was."

Maybe Kyra was right. Alexis caught herself before she voiced the thought out loud. Sure, she hoped they would be able to handle a proper date, but maybe it wasn't such a bad thing that they couldn't yet. They could take it slow, and that didn't make them lesser than any other couple.

Couple…

Alexis swallowed as butterflies danced in her stomach. "Hey, Mitty?"

"Yeah?"

"What do you want to do now?"

"Well, I was gonna go home."

"Do you want to?"

A pause.

"No."

Alexis fiddled with her sleeve. "Want to go back to my place and watch that new film?"

"But--"

"It's not a date, I promise. We don't have to do anything. I just want to spend time with you."

Mitty smiled slowly. "Okay."

They walked to Alexis' apartment together. Their shoulders brushed against each other, and neither pulled away.