hammieboye1's Links
My fair lady! I’ve come bearing a gift, gorgeous and freshly picked! (He kneels and holds out a bouquet.)
Oh, Hero, you needn’t kneel! These roses are wonderful - a beautiful red, thank you! (He didn’t pick these straight from the castle’s garden, did he? Our florist doesn’t sell these type of roses…)
This is… only a small pouch of money… but enough to eat at that five star restaurant i’ve always dreamed of?! Give me a generous six months and your stuff’s done and dusted!
I want five giant statues of me flexing and six more of me in a cool heroic pose and three big fancy paintings here's all my money
Your masterpiece is complete: I present to you.... an alien sculpture, carved out of a meteorite I found laying in the crop circles near your farm! Maybe it was a gift from above and not even my sculpture, you'll never know~
Your masterpiece is complete: I present to you... a brooch in the form of a scarab beetle, comprised of faceted peridot fastened to engraved, stained silver in the shape of two insect wings. I really, REALLY hate bugs, but commission work is commission work...
Woah!! This pillow is so cool I will use it to sleep on my job! Here is your money! And a tip! A giant cheese wheel and $50 :D
Your masterpiece is complete: I present to you... a hand-embroidered pillow picturing lambs and flowers. It would have been a small tapestry, but watching your sheep frolic about in the gentle spring breeze made me too sleepy!
My tummy hurts but I’m being so brave about it…
Pike, shut up, you bastard! And quit moving so i can get this dagger out of your stomach!! …(She lets out a long sigh.) You really need to learn how to not get stabbed…
Another crazy prophet, huh?! I'm just some random kid, alright? I just happened to catch a falling star one night, and now people tell me I'm the hero that saved the world 1,000 years ago or something... You seem competent, wanna do my job for me? I'm gonna go take a nap until this whole thing blows over.
Destined hero, truly?! I thought I'd never get to see the day to find another like me! Do tell, what does fate bring you?! What gifts? What purpose?
H-how’s this one look…? It’s the 15th iteration…
Told you, my nose is too big! I’m paying ya 80 gold to draw me so you better do it RIGHT! …And give me a handsome jawline and bigger muscles this time, got me?
Arlotto, what'd I tell you about returning with more scars?! I told you to be careful with yourself! There isn't any use in picking fights for no reason, you know...
Ahh, these? They're nothing, I've taken a lot worse. It's just adventuring experience, and free practice with my blade, hahaha!! Who knows, maybe the skills I've picked up from all those battles would help me protect you one day?
…So that’s what the Nether’s really like? I expected it to be a bit more… yaknow, exciting, dangerous and full of huge powerful demons guarding crazy treasure troves…
Hmhm~ Never once did I say that wasn’t true. A bard always finds his way to add… special flair to his stories. Perhaps you should visit? It would give us some much needed company… that is if you don’t carry a valuable head on those shoulders of yours, given how you speak of my homeland.
(He's caught upside down in a snare trap hanging from a tree. Both greed and hunger go a long way...) Hey, hey! I was merely… uh, scanning the area for birds' nests and holes rodents dig - people tend to put riches in there, yaknow? Coulda had my jackpot, if not for your stupid traps all over the place!! ...But... berries, you say...?
...Trying to steal my supply of medicinal berries, huh? Those aren't good to eat, you know...
You don’t talk down to my subjects like that! Cruel, cruel, you are!! They’re adorable and loving, you hear me??!
GAAAHHH!!! Keep those freaky jelly beasts AWAY from me or I’ll shoot their… guts out? Brain? What do those idiots even have?! I hate ‘em!!!
(He snickers, quickly dropping the slime he was doodling a face onto, and scurries away with a grin.) (You'll never catch me alive, sucker!)
MAXUUUUSSS!! WHAT'S YOUR PROBLEEEEMM!! Stop drawing weird little faces on my subjects!!!
My duties do not concern you or your 'friend'. Your battles for justice are mere child's play compared to what my world has been corrupted with... Foolish, you are, to wish to join me, as more numbers to our armies only means more men to lose. Keep to your own.
'nother Dryad, huh?! Who awakened you this late, ya grump? Got some late evil extermination to do or something? I got a friend who loves that kinda stuff, you should take him off my hands for a bit.