The scent of sweet incense wafted through the air, heavier than the gentle voice speaking. 

  "... Say, Maupin? I know... that you can't hear me... but I hope that wherever you are, you might be listening... I was just thinking, I had seen a nice pendant in the town some time back... It's been a while since I'd even set foot in a town proper. It was a simple black pendant. And... I know my own nails are black too, but isn't it natural to think of one's sister when it comes to jewelry? Aha... that was its beauty. It was so simple, and it would fit you... I mean... assuming... that you're still... living."

  There was a deep sigh, one that barely hitched at the morbid thought. 

  "I'm sorry... I know... I know that you're not gone. Giving up was never something you knew. That's not the Maupin I know... knew... I'm sorry if I'm bothering you... I never got to say I was sorry... I'm sorry that I... I hurt mother and father... I'm sorry... I hope that whoever you have now, whoever it is that you love, that they are well. I... I don't blame you for what you said... if you're away from me, then I'm sure you're well. Right... I promised I wouldn't say things like that, but... for my only sister, I have to say things like that, right? I mean it all. I'm sorry that sometimes I hope that you think of me. That's horribly selfish of me to think, isn't it? Of course it is... One day, your little brother might grow up. Until then... I wish you well. As much as that can mean from me."

  He snuffed out the incense, and rose with a deep breath. And as he turned- he came face to face with someone, with a sharp gasp. 

  "O-oh! I-I-I! I'm sorry-! I wasn't- wasn't blocking you, o-or bothering you, or... ah..."

"Ach," Winter mumbled, staring at his feet. He hadn't meant to disturb the half-elf. "Sorry about that." He looked down to meet Philia's dark eyes. He had heard bits and pieces of the elder party's words - technically he was older, but frozen years didn't count. Something about a lost sibling - a sister, from what he had heard - and the possibility of that sibling being dead. "That sister of yours," he said a bit uncomfortably, scowling at the ground behind his muzzle. "Doesn't seem as if she cares about you much. If that isn't like her to leave, she left because she didn't care." He thought that was a nice enough comfort, then cringed at his own words. "Wait, no, no, forget it."

He sighed, the sound coming out somewhat strangled. "Look, I bet that...Maupin...is still living. Alive somewhere, and probably happy, da? And nyet, you're not selfish for thinking things like that. It's normal. We lose someone, whether they're dead or alive, and we wish that they'd stayed, or that they think of us, or that we could see them again. You're not wrong to think like that." Quite kind words, from the Winter Soldier who had murdered hundreds whether in cold blood or not.

"I doubt you hurt your parents," Winter continued on, staring up at the sky for no apparent reason. "They might not love you, da, but they're your parents. You could never hurt them. Unless you killed them." He barked a laugh. Typical Winter, always spouting bits of morbid humour that was hardly funny - he hoped he hadn't hurt Philia. "You're a strong person. Or elf. Whatever you are, you're strong, and I'm sure your sister is too. People do things, and they have reasons, that they might not want to share. Until then, until you find her, or she comes to you, or you find out why or what or even how, be strong. Shouldn't be too hard - you are strong. And brave. And not selfish at all, from the bits I've gathered from you. Keep...doing what you're doing, and you'll be alright." All the wisdom the Winter Soldier had to offer.

Winter groaned, his head in his hands, sitting in his room. He hadn't taken his muzzle off, only keeping it on to ensure he didn't hurt anyone. It brought a sense of strange comfort for him, and he had no idea why. All those people he'd been programmed to kill. He had just killed. "If I'd been strong, I could have resisted," he muttered to himself. "I could have disobeyed- NYET." He found he was arguing with himself, contradicting himself again. How could he ever repent for his sins? How could he ever be "good" when he had done so much evil? He was lost in himself. And didn't know what to do.

Flint grits his teeth and pulls at his hair. This was something he was taught--no, trained to do when he was younger. If he felt like screaming or crying, just grit your teeth and pull your hair. Making sounds earned him 10 more minutes of training, training made him want to scream and cry. It was a vicious cycle. That was when he was younger but the habit always stuck.

"I'm fine." Flint barks out when he senses body heat behind him and hears the crunching of grass against shoes, he mentally curses at himself, he had been so distracted with feelings that he didn't even notice someone sneaking up on him. He would have been dead if it was an enemy.

Hot tears roll down Flint's face and the boy makes a quick effort to wipe it away but more just kept coming, running down his cheeks in waves, in his desperate attempt to wipe them away his frustration only created more waves. "I'm sorry." He hiccups, feeling like all the strength has left his body, his knees hitting the floor. "I don't want to do this anymore. I don't want to be a weapon. I don't care about the money, or the fame it gets me." he sobs, "I just want to be someone." Flint's fiingers grasp at the grass under his palms, his nails digging into his skin makes him feel a little better. "I just want friends, a family, I just want someone to love me... not as a weapon, but for who I am. But who am I?!" his throat burns from the tears and not being used to speaking this much or this loudly. "I don't even know who I am! The person I am was shaped and controlled by disgusting and aggressive people! Who am I? How do I find myself?"

“Hu..Oh thanks,” he said. Beaming Alaunus a weak smile as he accepted the towel. Nathaniel hissed softly as he pressed the ice against the sensitive tissue. Cold!
“Thanks again,” Nathaniel stated as he kept the ice in its place. “Mm,” he replied. Strengthening his grip around the towel. “It’s my bar. I can do what I want,” he said.
Lightly, as if he was talking about what type of beer his bar would serve.  The harpooner laughed. “But I would take it in reconsideration next time,” he said. Still pressing that towel against his eye. “I saw his mates dragging him out of the ship. Did he get help?” Nathaniel snorted. “Good for him.” Nathaniel’s only functioning ear pricked. He switched his gaze away from his mirror and to the Lytro. Giving him a sheepish grin. Not denying or accepting his accusations.

“It was right?” He huffed. “He always talks too much when he drinks, it’s so annoying,” Nathaniel said. The harpooner opened his tap again, this time to try and wash his cloth. (with one hand. It didn’t work.)
“I'm sure he’s overthinking his words now,” Nathaniel couldn’t help but chuckle. He wrung out his cloth. Soaking his hand.
“Well next time... People are actually shut up when I tell them to,” Nathaniel said. Drying his hand on his shirt. “Now that they know what I do when they don’t shut up. Right?” He laughed.
“Can you tap me a beer? I’m pretty useless with one hand,” he said. “You can tap one for yourself too. I got some coffee too.. If that’s more your taste.” 

The android dismally sat himself on the leather arm chair as he placed his hands against the temples of his head. His shoulders tightened against each other, as awfully sturdy tension jolted through the man. His pale bisque fingers clenched against the thick strands of his feathery, curled dark carob hair.. His black wide-brimmed fedora had been placed onto the side. He wretchedly gazed down at his wingtip black and white saddle shoes, his eyes bulged as a hue of grey sparked onto the imprints of his face and hands. His lips were tensely straightened as a thick bead of yellow oil trickled down through the man's head, slowly trickling down over his neck as he simply let it out raced down.. He released a few brisk, yet hefty puffs from his chest, as his heart fiercely thumped against his chest completely absorbed into his racing, savage thoughts that constantly reminded him of how much of a complete failure he was into pleasing those with his fashion.. How he couldn't make others think that he was handsome, on how his looks were overall the most ugliest and hideous that one could ever see. No matter how hard he tried, he just couldn't make himself look fashionable. With every tidy strand of his hair, with no blemish of dirt soiled onto his clothing, with no sight of a crystal glistening upon his jaws with every moment he beamed with a toothy, playful grin.

It had been a while ever since Reiner had freed himself from the Android Acceptance facility.. He had been greatly (negatively as well) impacted from all the events that he had the experience along the way. It all came from cutting off his mid-length hair that he previously adorned, from losing multiple of his android familiars thanks to their abusive tactics and manipulation, especially as he was blamed for "not being good enough of an idol for them to raise money and awareness." He was severely scarred in his head from all of this experiences, traumatized to his very last breath as flashes of churning fear and and wretchedness surged onto the man. Though today.. Reiner couldn't seem himself the same, especially after he had been bluntly commented that he appeared absolutely hideous with his new formal attire.. It all had consisted of a black inverness cape coat hanging down by the top of his shoulders elegantly, along with a desaturated light blue mandarin collar. Ever since that harsh remark had been punched against his delicate, plush heart.. It had left a large gash onto him as it painfully oozed in blood, trickling down onto his wires and overall raw steel material from his inside. But that comment did more than simply hurt him.. It broke him twice as more, as so did every small nit pick and remark about his own looks, as he genuinely didn't want to look gruesome or unsightly in some way, to an extent where nobody saw no value in interacting with him or befriending him, thanks to his looks. Or perhaps, his hideous looks were just another unwanted trait of him, as he believed to please those that wanted for him to look good, no matter how hard he tried.. Reiner had always been apprehensive of it, no matter what.. It shook him to his very core of his spine, as all he ever wanted was to be handsome and striking in some way. How could he? 

Reiner descended from the arm chair as he would brusquely stride off from the room, only to make his way over to a small dressing room where vanity had been sitting at the front of the room. Balls of silver light beamed through the whole room, warming up the room and enhancing the overall exterior design of the borders of the square mirror that had been installed onto the vanity. That was until the man stopped his tracks as soon as he spotted a small sign that had been written, dressing room, at the top center of the door. He vacantly gaze upon the sign, reluctance pausing his tracks as he was afraid to see all of those nits, cracks and smudges possibly deteriorating his overall appearance.. But he had to go look inside, he had to know what was rupturing his appearance, why she would make a comment like that so he could try and fix himself.. Was his mustache uneven? Did his hair appear too demented from the fact that it was dyed silver? Was his hair messy? Were the colors clashing too much? He didn't know at all, he had to go look! 

The German android finally twisted the metal doorknob of the door's dressing room, stepping inside as his overall face and body reflected upon the surface of the mirror.. How distorted he must've looked in that reflection as he shifted his sight over to it, peering at himself in nothing but pure internal disgust and anguish. His eyebrows creased down as the stormy grey hue only darkened twice as more, now beginning to know why the female would make such a comment. He stepped over to the red cushioned stool infront of the vanity. He released a quivering whimper, as he ascended onto it and placed his hands against the deck of the vanity. No, he knew why he looked so hideous! It was all because of his hair, because of his sophisticated attire, his mustache must've been scattered with the tiniest of bread dumbs and disorderly with tangled tiny coarse strands of hair! Why? Why did he have to look so awful, everything was so much worse with that neck-length hair of his! `` Why..?-`` His large, frail hands began to tremble as he disconnected his gaze from the mirror, opening up his palms as he gazed at his own hands.. Why did he have to be so ugly? Why? Why couldn't he be handsome like how everybody said that he was.. No, nobody said that in the first place! It wasn't even true! They were all lies ever since from the start! Everything that the staff of the Android Acceptance said, mocking his looks and appearance, they were all true after all.. He believed them so well from the start..

More whimpers escaped from his chest, as the tumor throbbing against his throat won him over as frigid, heavy tears deluged onto the corners of his dimly lit chestnut eyes. A small hiccup released from the man, beginning to trickle down on the curves of his cherry curled cheeks.. His burning eyes scrunched up as his pale raspberry lips quivered, as tears crashed against the surface of the deck of the vanity. Louder whimpers and disheveled moans escaped from the man, as the small beads of tears never paused in terms of racing down through his cheeks and neck, or even crashing upon the surface to create a tiny puddles of tears glistening from the illuminated sphered balls bordering on the square mirror. His back severely pumped as heaps of squeaks and sobs escaped from him. He closed his eyes as he perceived every single freezing tear of his tapping down.. Even his hands clenched upon the surface of the cold deck infront of him, hunching his head down as he cried and cried. Why did he have to be so hideous? Why couldn't he look any better? All he wanted to be was handsome and happy with how he looked like everyone else did.. He was such a fool for being this way.. Oh, he didn't wanna be a fool! He just didn't! `` I-I just wanna.. be handsome..! `` He painfully choked up from his helpless cries, convulsively gasping and whimpering as he bawled. `` W-..why can't I b-be handsome..`` 

Val had roamed around the rooms of the facility for a bit, trying to find that singer again. He had really pretty shoes and so Val wanted to ask where he had gotten them. A lot of the things he saw he had expected, they were vaguely similar to the club he was working at, if a bit darker - but that was probably due to the different individuals working here. What he did not expect was to hear someone crying. Immidiately his chest tightened, just because it was painful to hear someone sad... no one should be sad after all! Not, that he wanted to forbid being sad, he- aaargh, he was doing it again!
Instead of his thoughts he followed the voice and carefully knocked at the heavy looking door - was it actually like that or was it just the atmosphere?. When he did not get an answer he carefully pushed it open, just enough for him to slip inside before closing it again. "Hey..." Val said quietly as to not scare the sobbing man. Did he even hear him? He didn't know... as the man seemed to talk to himself. "Now, now... that's no way of talking to yourself..." the dancer remarked carefully and tried to make his way around the table to be able to actually look at Reiner as he ducked down a bit to meet his teary blurred gaze. "You know, I think you are handsome. You have like, the prettiest hair! And your mustache is kind of cute... your eyes are beautiful as well. also your outfit... I actually wanted to ask where you got these shoes!" Val took a deep breath. He was really bad at this and he was sorry already but it was better than being alone with this, right?

"Buuut that's not the point, okay?" this time a voice was a little more firm than before. "You know, people will always find things they can criticize about you, right? As much as you will always find things you don't like about yourself and that's okay, honestly. I mean, I don't know anyone who feels handsome all the time." Val tried his best at an encouraging smile. "The important thing is that those are all subjective opinions... and some people are mean and will tell you you look bad just to tear you down, especially if they know it hits you that hard. But you are so much more than people say or can even imagine! I know, there might be voices in your head telling you otherwise but you don't have to believe them! Imagine how great you would be if you never ever doubted yourself.... people just couldn't handle that! So they just HAVE to make you feel bad." while talking he got a little excited and now had a bright smile on his face, that faded a little when he saw all those tears again. Hesitantly he reached out to touch Reiner's hand, just lightly, he didn't want to scare him. Val knew that some people did not want to be touched when they felt bad about themselves - otherwise he would have hugged the man already - but surely a gentle touch to his hand would be fine? 

"Listen to me, I might not know a lot, but I do know that you sure have so many amazing abilities that no one else has. I don't even have to know you for that, you have like, such a warm and friendly aura and the amazing talent to absolutely capture people by your performance - not many people have that! You are incredibly talented and dedicated, otherwise you would not be as good as you are now! You have such a unique and great fashion sense and it looks so good on you, I mean, you can literally pull off anything! And, you know, these are just the things people can see without knowing you. I don't know what happened to you or how cruel people have been to make you think this way..." and it honestly made him angry on Reiner's behalf, because he did not deserve to be treated that way!, "...but don't let these negative thoughts and feelings get the best of you." 

For a while he was just quiet, listening to the silence that had filled the room. "It... it's okay to feel sad and to not like yourself all the time, no one does that, but it's important to remember that you are not what your heavy thoughts tell you. You are amazing and you have a beautiful heart..." Of course Val did not know that the man was actually an android, but even then, he surely had some semblance of a heart, right? It was more symbolic anyway, "...no one can take that from you, they can only be jealous and pathetic and try to tear you down for it. And you still have the strength to go out there and be kind to them. ...and if that isn't beautiful I don't know what is."

"You know you are just stupid, right?" the dancer asked himself, reciting the last question that was thrown at him before he had stormed off, just... away. Somewhere. "Of course I fucking know, I'm not THAT stupid, okay?!" he quietly yelled at himself out of sheer frustration. That's what you get for believing in the best in people! Just a bunch of stupid pain and even better unnecessary remarks. Val took a deep breath as to not break down crying in the middle of the street. Not that anyone would have cared, it was late at night and no one was around, really, but still... a dark alley looked as comforting as it would get so he snuck in there, not really watching his surroundings. If he happened to run into a serial killer they might as well try their luck, ha! After all, that was the one thing he was good for. As a weapon, a thing, to get rid of people while most people wanted to get rid of him instead... kind of ironic, wasn't it? 

He gave up a frustrated noise as he hit his head against the wall before leaning against it and slowly sliding towards the ground until he was no more than a small bundle of pity that hated itself. "Why can't I just, for once, not be the idiot of the story?" he sighed as he finally allowed the tears to stream down his face and blur his sight. "Am I really that bad?" he asked the void that was there to comfort him. "I mean, I guess I am..." Val laughed silently, choking on his tears. What was he, really? A disgusting creature created and groomed to fight and look nice. Didn't really scream 'human being', did it? Not that he was one in the first place... Of course no one would like him. Why should they? 

Remembering his own advice he tried to remind himself that what people said was not the most important thing in the world and yet, how could he ignore it when it was all he ever heard? No one ever tried to convince him otherwise, well, apart from Shin, but that was another... difficult... thing. How nice it must have been to be hugged by someone who just wanted to be there... and nothing more. But that wasn't for him, right? He had the darkness of this alley that slowly swallowed him. Next to the waste and sad remains of human life, where he belonged.

(Marco: reject humanity. return to wolf... maybe)
Marco sat under a tree, leaning against it, as he wistfully gazed into the forest in front of him. Behind him, in the distance, loomed the city he lived in. At times he wonders if should just go into the woods and never return. Never return to humans, to the hardships, to everything he failed miserably at. Just enjoy being a lone wolf in the wilderness. If they knew, they'd chase him to here anyways. If they didn't cut his head off first, that is, like the hunters who were after him surely would love to do. Maybe he was just an evil demon. Maybe he should just leave everything behind. Leave everything behind... Like there was anything to be left behind. He didn't have that many friends and he never accomplished anything in his life.
He let his head hang low, choosing to look at neither trees nor skyscrapers, but the dirt, riddled with a few bugs, instead. Truly, the shapeshifter did not know what to do. What life was worth living? What path worth choosing? While so deep in thoughts, his body slowly slumped down the tree until he was halfway laying on the ground.

Then the celestial began opening up to Marco. No place here? Intervene with his happiness? LEAVE HIM?! Marcos eyes widened in shock. What does that mean?... The wolf opened his mouth slightly. He was almost about to say something, but he could hold back just in time. He still was unsure if Caelestis should know and letting him hear his voice will definetely reveal who his other side is. What was he gonna do now? Sure, he could just continue to lay there and pretend to not understand his lover, but surely he could do something to at least show that he cares. So, he extended his head towards Caelestis dragged his large tongue across his cheek before looking him in the eyes and letting out a quiet whimper. Then, after pulling his head back, he lifted up his wing and chimmied it around a bit, while maintaining eye contact. Seems like he was inviting Caelestis for some wolf cuddles.

It was a fine bar with fine drinks, although Caelestis couldn't bring himself to care all too much regardless, as he downed glass after glass of the strongest wine, each cup only serving to strengthen the feelings weighing him down. Even if in a manner that was almost comforting. To feel nothing at all was far more terrifying of a thing, after all, even despite the pain it would always bring. It was a conflicting feeling, truthfully, between embracing them for the beauty they held, and running, for the overwhelming, unbearable power that they would shake him with until he could not find anything to do with himself at all. And so, he drank. The only easy conclusion that could be reached, and... the least harmful option, in a way. At least for him.

His entire existence felt as if nothing but an infinite series of failures. Each day he would continue onward, but each day it only became increasingly difficult to ignore the unfortunate fates that always seemed to follow along with him. Surely there were times that he'd helped—many of them, truly—but when nearly all that remained in his memories were the vague feelings of his countless heartbreaks, tragedies, and deficiencies, what did it matter? He could not dare ask for happiness when his ventures in search of it have only left behind sorrow and loss at nearly every opportunity. He was useless. Beyond useless, really, when it felt as if he always either could do nothing at all, or only make things worse. Was this his punishment for denying the path his existence had been meant to take? If any path at all, that is. Driven so thoroughly by his desires, it felt natural for the karmic consequences to follow soon behind, but why must others be harmed as well in the process? Even when he had not yet hurt someone, he still could not seem to do anything to help. It was only complete and utter powerlessness. Why did there never seem to be anything he could do for anyone? What good was he at all? And yet in spite of everything, he still continued on with this infinite life, driven only by his selfishness time and time again.

Caelestis set down the empty glass, letting out a long, quiet sigh. He almost hoped he wouldn't run into anyone he knew anytime soon, for it might be difficult for the feelings to resist spilling out. Or... anyone at all, really, although at least that would hold fewer consequences.

Caelestis turned his head to the sight of that… mysterious lemon farmer from before. He'd admittedly been hoping to encounter him again, but a place like this was not where he would have expected that to happen. Either way, it was a convenient level of familiarity for spilling out all his woes to. And though he'd tried to hold back, that was exactly what happened, unsurprisingly.

Not meant to be… It wasn't a thought Caelestis liked to linger on. Not in the slightest, if only for the frightening likely possibility of it being the simple truth. Even just describing NV was somehow difficult, the memories still so vivid and clear, and yet… already beginning to feel distant. Memories that would soon fade as any other, regardless of whether he wished for it or not. More than anything, he did not want to forget.

He raised an eyebrow at Vy's odd reaction. Did the man know something about them…? If Caelestis had been intrigued before, now he was thoroughly so, although he held back the urge to pry for now. It would be difficult when in such an emotional mood regardless.

"…Fate, huh?" He looked down, vision finally beginning to blur with tears. Was it? At this point, he wondered if it was the only conclusion that could be reached. "Someone else…" he repeated softly with a sigh, a sudden urge to curl up and cry overtaking him. There didn't seem to be anyone truly meant for him. It would be foolish to assume otherwise when one's countless experiences did nothing but continuously prove otherwise. He stayed silent for a few more moments, appreciating the company even so. 

Ah, fate… Was there truly anything more detestable in the end? 

He raised his head back up to down another glass all at once before turning to Vy, a bittersweet, but oddly resolute smile having formed on his face. "Thank you... I appreciate it, truly." Driven by the wine, the celestial pulled Vy into a sudden, impulsive hug. "I won't give up on them. Not so easily." Maybe… not the message the other had been attempting to convey, though. But if this was fate, then fuck fate. What good had it ever done? He would not so passively allow himself to be controlled. And then… somehow, perhaps he could work something out. If time was needed, he had plenty of it. If things were broken entirely beyond repair, then he could rebuild from scratch. It would hurt to be forgotten, but if it was for the best, so be it. If his form itself was too memorable, he could simply take on another. And if it was still no good even then, or it was to become undeniable that NV truly only suffered from his presence, only then would he finally be left with no choice but to let go.

Once somewhat awkwardly ending the hug, Caelestis slid off the seat, setting the tab onto the counter before turning back towards Vy. He paused for a moment in contemplation, speaking up a few moments later. "Might you have directions for your farm, in fact? I'd like to buy all the lemons you have. Or… at least return for more." He chuckled briefly. "I was terribly lost at the time, you see, so I haven't the slightest clue of the location." In addition, it could be a good opportunity to figure a bit more out about Vy, and also… hopefully NV, if possible.