^ couldn't resist a bonus reaction for that, whooo boy
Caelestis reached to the top of his head, dazed. The touch still lingered. Warm, yet distant, twisting at his heart all the more cruelly. To think, after everything, he could still think so naively. En had been right—every bit of it—and that stung all the more. He just…
You're really all alone now, that voice at last sounded, tone gleefully mocking. It had been so quiet all this time, yet he could only realise it had been simply laughing silently all the while. NV is gone, and you know they'll never want you back. Your precious En has finally had enough of you. You have no one left at all.
It's only you and me.
He tried to ignore it. En hadn't outright expressed any true hatred, he desperately reasoned. It was fair. There was... still a chance to salvage it all, theoretically—that was what the man had implied, right? Yet Caelestis' now free arms hugged loosely around one another, gaze lowering to the ground with heavying breaths. Every moment longer he lingered, the feeling sunk further through and about like an oppressive wave, suffocating, consuming. He wasn't wanted anymore. He wasn't good enough anymore. Not like this.
You never were, his mind laughed.
(evil eeeennn. also tired af and i have no idea if this makes sense at all or not, so pls go easy on me ahjksghjks)
After what felt only a short time since En's unexpected rejection, the rain had slowed to a stop nearly as suddenly as it had started, even if a little too late for anyone to avoid getting fairly thoroughly drenched though any time spent underneath it. "En," Caelestis called out at the first sight of the other's figure, walking briskly to catch up. "En… En." It was one thing to be angry at him, but to walk right off into the rain like that—!
"I'm sorry. I can leave if you'd rather—you don't have to. I just..." He'd followed on maybe a bit too much of a whim, admittedly. How badly was this pushing his luck now? Did En already hate him all over again? Was the time he feared already becoming reality? "I don't mean to bother you more, but I... feel as though I've taken you for granted, lately," he finally expressed. "I have. You've helped me, time and time again, now. I liked you when you wanted me dead." Perhaps somewhat questionably attracted, frankly. "I still will, even if it becomes so again."
"And now, even while hardened by the world, there remain so many times that show how greatly you care. That glower in your eyes when you're irritated that I can't help but enjoy, your seldom yet dazzling smiles, the faint yet unmistakable softness when caring for your pets. Your harshest moments are sobering, and your moments of affection are all the more heart-fluttering, to the point where I can barely think at all. You've tolerated me for so long, yet I can never predict you."
Unconsciously, his hand grasped loosely onto En's. "Every moment together is such a freshening thrill, I can't begin to explain it. All the unexpected, endearing little things… Everything about you, I…" While pausing to take a proper, deep breath, Caelestis' eyes at last drifted away. Gazing at the ex-prince so fixedly, he could feel it as well—the lurking thoughts that yearned to seep through. It was frightening. To spill all these feelings so effortlessly and unwarranted still, was this the influence of Envy as well? "I can't blame you for any path you take, but I don't want you to walk it alone. I hope you know that."
He looked back at En, although with less courage. How pathetic it was, all but begging him for forgiveness at the slightest show of disapproval. What if he truly did loathe him again already, and this shameless persistence was only further sealing his fate? What if he just hadn't been in the mood for any coffee? "And I mean to say—I had no wish to leave, let alone so suddenly. Only… to host that soul brings certain powers as well, and if… the ones given to me are anything like theirs were, I fear for your safety. Already, I believe almost…" He trailed off with a frown. "I mean to thank you, and apologize. My mind is muddled and misled. If there are any other ways I've wronged you, please, tell me."