Say something nice about the above person's lit!

ChicketyChina (Nice username, by the way!)

I read the first chapter. This was a very nostalgic read for me! It reminded me a lot of the silly characters and stories I loved to write when I was younger; it feels like a cartoon, and I felt like I could picture the scenes in an animated series-- the slapstick action, the jokes about the ruined television, the sitcom premise, the characters' foolery. I enjoyed your little snips at the characters, like the aside about why they own a digital clock, and that Danz's prized "dish" is just two microwaved foods. Your scenes and jokes move on quickly and never overstay their welcome; you have a good sense for timing.

I'm not usually big on toilet humor, but this was fun-- I like some of your phrasing, like a "grandiose dump," and the idea of Dundee being proud of how cleanly he pooped is so weirdly silly. This was a fun read, and you write enjoyable characters!

Any of mine are fine to choose this time!

hedgemaze

i picked 21 at midnight!

i really like the relationship between jill and amber. it is really well portrayed and their interactions all seem very genuine and believable. your descriptions are really unique and well phrased. i particularly like the sentence, "The drinks were cheap, the music was loud, the bands were easy to make fun of, and the newly-21 Amber was accumulating free drinks from friendly patrons like they were going out of style." It really sets the mood in my opinion. your writing style is descriptive and somewhat casual as you write almost like someone speaking, for example "Her resolve probably wouldn't last very long, but hey, it was an attempt.", which works really well for this piece! 

great character interaction, great mood, great style: just a really great piece!

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here is my one-shot collection

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aaahhhh!!! thank you so much!! it was so neat to read your reactions to my writing! i'm glad you liked them!

lordsatin i ended up reading two of your one-shots because your writing style is very easy and fun to follow!

i love you too much is the first. at first i picked it expecting a sappy and cute drabble but hoo boy i was WRONG. not that it's a bad thing! it's a pleasantly dark surprise. you really, really caught the lovestruck headspace hibiki is in with the way you start the drabble. i was put in a false sense of security that the tale would be the cute love story i was expected. i especially enjoy the details of his thoughts that you put in the parentheses between phrases, it really adds to the depth of hibiki's creepiness. and his justification for all his actions at the end? (chef kiss) thats a VERY good way to end the drabble. i love it.

then the second is vending machines and near-death experiences which i thought wow what a curious title, i NEED to read this, IMMEDIATELY, and i wasnt disappointed!! lumi's ignorance is,, oddly adorable, i always love "getting used to new environments and being very amazed by it" kinda stories, not to mention lumi is just a huge sweetheart! she just wants to help people with all she could and thats just adorable!!

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i have tales to die for and the world's signing off, both of which are my (and my friend's, for TTDF) one-shot collections from their respective universes. all tales in TTDF save for "sylvia's just a dying fad" are mine! there's also the stars fall a little slower that i just came up with the concept like... yesterday.

crescentseer I ended up reading the stars fall a little slower and it was just so poetic? I don’t really know how else to explain it, but the writing, especially the beginning, flowed so well. I’m assuming you put a lot of effort into choosing the right words. 

I’ve only just met Funeral and the narrator, but their personalities are already pretty clear. Mainly what stood out to me was how precise the word choice was? The emotions were all expressed really well too. 

I am not explaining this well smh

Anyway I really liked the concept and I’m interested to see where it goes if you’re planning on continuing it!

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It’s a bit long but here’s something I wrote a while back. 

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Aaaaa ty! I’m glad you liked it!

What a sweet read! A heavy topic, but really sweet and warmhearted. The dynamic between Kazuo and Joji went from strained to just awkward and cute so smoothly. The short paragraph style you have is interesting! It really worked well with your piece's subtlety - in the first chapter especially, we're missing a lot of details and context, and it really instills a sort of dread about not knowing what, exactly, is wrong, which suited the mood really really well. Kazuo snapping his elastic band was a great little detail for quietly establishing a lot of information about him.
The thing that obviously stood out the most though was the repetition of the phrase "okay" - it hit the theme so perfectly, especially the way it was used in different contexts, making it almost bittersweet like the rest of the story. Really lovely, and Kazuo seems so sweet <3

so glad to see this thread alive again! here's my library, hope you find something interesting, concrit welcome!

thank you so much! <3 

wormancer

i decided to read Well-Nigh a Revenant. the eerie cover image and the synopsis both caught me eye. the whole mood of this piece was absolutely fantastic. rien's cold angry determination to go through with his murder plot is so interesting to read. I particularly love these two lines "How ironic is it that this monster's books taught me the most deadly places to cut someone?How ironic is it that he taught me about treachery and deceit and killing ones own family?" They really give me a look in Rien's thoughts of the professor. I really like how you didn't oversell the murder itself. there's no long drawn out description but it gets the emotions across with no issue. I also like the somewhat melancholy ending. Rien got what he wanted but he doesn't seem super happy about it. "A grim satisfaction" Just a really cool piece!

here's my oneshot collection

lordsatin
of the oneshots of the collection i chose to read vending machines and near-death experiences and i loved it!! lumi is so sweet and its so cute how clueless she is about certain things? like when she says the circle money referring to coins! and agent b is stoic and has to deal with a lot of that, even though lumi is the cutest creature alive!!

i have a story called let me in please? it's long but it's okay if you just read the first chapter ;v;

totokatokako pinging since it's been a while, and in case you're still interested in this thread!

i should get into literature threads more often :') they seem right up my alley and i need the motivation to finish more literature haaa--

BUT, I read though both let me in please? and Please come in ! both of which i genuinely enjoyed, and reading through them i can tell that it seems you have a decent handle on dialogue? especially so in "let me in please?" as the first few chapters are definitely dialogue heavy, and even more so, it seems as though you might shine best through first person!

first person writing has always been fascinating to me. it's a really good way to get into the heads of your characters and work yourself up and feel for them, and i could absolutely feel that through both of these lit. pieces!

this ties a bit into first person, too, but i admire the way that you've so far shown yourself handling mental illness, especially one like DID which typically doesn't get a good rep in media. your works are certainly some that should be appreciated far more, and i'd love to fave every single one of them... which i'm going to.

my literature is here! all are one shots, and i only have five atm.

vv finally someone with good taste [I Have No Mouth and I Must Scream is my favorite sci-fi story]

but this is so sweet, tysm tysm tysm......... :') i'm glad a lot people seem to like that one! it still does need a lot of editing since i tend to forget to do that sort of thing, but i certainly appreciate the sentiment thats already been dropped ha--

Vapor I'm afraid I'm not the best reviewer but I tried my best!
I read Like Stars We Return To Dust and I loved the atmosphere of it! The way it's structured is really nice. The short impactful statements and the longer more detailed sentences create a nice mix! This extends to the splitting of the paragraphs, especially on the last lines. And I love the wording too.   More specifically, word choices like "devoured", "razed", and "tore".   Really gets me into the hopeless/destructive feeling of it. And those are just in the first paragraph! There's A LOT I could quote but I  loved  "With our communications shut down, there was no way that we could have warned others. Not that we ever desired to.". It really says a lot about the way the character(s) think of those beside themselves.   Overall, short but sweet! And I love me some apocalyptic machines.   Wargames, I Have No Mouth and I Must Scream, etc. Boom. Instant like.   But that's my personal bias shining through.
I'm going to have to read through more of your stuff because this was a great start! :^)  Hope you have a wonderful day/night and stay safe!!

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I don't have much of my writing on here because I'm very finicky with posting it. In fact, the literature I have on here is all posted on a whim. Alone Time is the best and shortest out of what I have and doesn't warrant any content warnings. Though the more I look at it the less I like it. But life goes on! No use dwelling on it. In fact, this thread makes me want to get over myself and post more of my old writing.
EDIT: Ah thank you so much!! My imagination is very vivid so I try and describe what I see as clearly as I can. Glad to see I'm doing a decent job of it lmao. I'd love to eventually write King of the House into a book but I'm sure I wouldn't be able to quell my attention deficit enough for that to happen. I can always hope though!

InCerebralTerms Debated which to read and ended up reading both in your library :'D I loved I Never Liked Rory Downs for the wonderful almost old fashioned short story style and the characterization of Nicky and Jett, especially in how they think of Rory, but I totally see why Alone Time is your favourite. You have a beautifully subtle way of setting the scene! Piecing a mental image together as I went along was really interesting, and I loved the line, "The light that bounced across the space was quickly cut off by Harrison snatching shut the curtains," especially, it's small but really immersive imagery and phrasing!
Reaching the end when Harrison puts whatever image he puts up back together again after seeing how he was moments before and his own reaction to his smile in the mirror is really impactful and like... unsettling, even <3 I'd honestly love to read more King of the House, what a setup.
ALSO. dude I love your art. absolutely neat.

Here's my library, couple different lengths in there, hope you see something you like! concrit welcome ✌️

v OH MY GOSH THANK YOU SO MUCH 😭😭😭😭 I actually JUST did a big edit to suit yourself like yesterday and I'm so glad since that's the one you ended up reading. I am Moved I am Touched my Heart is Full...

wormancer I am... haunted by your work, your imagery... I just read Suit Yourself in the Clothes You'll be Buried In and I don't even know these characters but I'm like... that picture of the emoji being bonked on the head with a hammer.

"I couldn't say what I was scared of, but I was scared enough that I would rather stay there by myself, staring downwards like the sound of the water could wash away my fear. It sometimes came close." WHOA... It sometimes came close... This might be because I interpreted it wrong at first (as in, the water sometimes came physically closer) but it had me thinking about those lines for a couple minutes.

and then at the end, "Jackwell didn't even nod. Beneath her eyes, I had to turn away, begging the water below to grant me peace of mind. For a moment, it was all I could hear, and I hoped it had deafened me to the sound of her footsteps, but then she spoke the last words I would ever hear from her.
"Suit yourself."
And I did."

just struck me, not just in a "OHHHHHH CALLBACK TO THE TITLE" kind of way, but just... the imagery. This person hears only the ocean, but then over the roar of the sea comes that line? I imagined it spoken softly; Jackwell's voice isn't raised at all, but over the white noise on the coast comes this phrase that just feels... deadly. I saw this scene vividly, like I was intruding upon it... also I happen to love short punchy lines, I'm biased but they're good and strong.

I'm 100% rambling but I also read No Doctor, No God, No Miracle. Once again I'm just like... :BONK: The little line in the blurb hooked me, and then it was like... this continuous "oh no oh no..." Like I started with no idea what's going on in this world but right away I wanted to know so much more.

I'm bad at focusing at the best of times, and especially right now, but I really enjoyed your work.

My library is small but here it is! I have some more stuff to upload that I'm just nervous to post because kind of dark content.

WAA WOW I'M GONNA CRY.... this is so nice to read, I read it on my phone at work and was just smiling so hard! I'm so glad that someone not only read my work but enjoyed it! I'm just ;__; I was debating posting a Henrietta follow up, confessions of a crappy nun and this makes me feel like "someone out there actually likes these characters" and makes me wanna post it!

I read a couple stories and decided to review Confessions of a Disgraced Child Star. I've got to say, you have a really good flow with your words. Nothing ever drags on; you're able to change subjects or transitions scenes quickly and smoothly without derailing focus.
I didn't read about the characters immediately, so the intro into the story was pretty interesting. My first impressions went to Henrietta, a nun that's smoking. Both of those ideas immediately go against the grain from each other, since people usually think nuns are always pure and always innocent. And she's talking to a guy that wants advice on a sugar daddy! She's not a typical nun, and I like that about her. I like that about the introduction; it already takes my expectations and turns it around.
I liked seeing everything through Dejan's point of view. That line where he mentioned thinking his parents were selfish for not buying him things when in truth they'd lost their riches? It was pretty relatable! When you're a kid you focus a little more on yourself than anything else, because that's just how growing up works! I don't know, it just resonated with me.
The build up throughout Dejan's childhood is heartbreaking. He starts of with such a great time and finds out he has a hobby he enjoys, but his parents start monopolizing on it to the point of quitting their own jobs. It's a powerful line because of the hidden information behind it; you can feel the stress Dejan feels because now he's the only one in his family making the money. And he's not even a teenager yet!
So you feel that stress and then see that Dejan couldn't work, and the immediate thought is: oh no. Because now we know how hard his parents are going on him, and without him working we know that however bad they were would be worse. But there's a beauty in knowing that - we immediately knew they'd be worse, not loving or apologetic. And that is artfully done through the writing.
The pacing afterwards is wonderful. We got the nice, slow burn of the childhood pain, but it's lightning when Dejan gets older. The way his parents twist his diagnosis to get his money, the way the media abandons him after coming out, it was like blow after blow and I couldn't stop reading because I was hooked.
When his sugar daddy is brought up I was filled with that sense of oh no and good. I'm glad Dejan finally got a home and someone that "cared", but there was an eerie feeling that kept it from feeling like a happy ending. I believe that's intentional in the tone and in the vagueness of Dejan's descriptions, and it's excellently executed, especially when Henrietta is back in the picture. It was a clever touch to mention her hand, because you really can't tell if she's just cold or angry. But she definitely cares and it gives a... kinda depth to her from the beginning, if that makes sense? Like yeah, she's not a picture perfect nun, but she's still trying to help and taking care of Dejan.

All in all, the pacing, the wording, and the voice of the story were wonderfully done! It kept my interest the entire time and gave me a huge variety of emotions while reading. Absolutely great job!

Happy Together is a story I've recently been working on so I'm weak for compliments on it _(:3」∠)_ You don't have to read all of it, you can pick a chapter to read. Smiley shows up in Chapter 3 tho
And you don't have to read that story, either! Here's my library. There are some joke stories in there that you can pick too.

sobs, i'm gonna cry for days now   i was so nervous about uploading the story, i'm glad you liked it